Yippee-IA, Motherf***ers! IRRATIONALLY ANGRY PT. 2: Irrationally Angrier

i wonder how early girls learn the death stare. i feel like i was born with it.

I recently picked it up a bloke's train ticket and tried to give it back thinking he'd dropped it accidentally but he was just littering. made me feel like an idiot.

multi-tweet-quoting

good-natured "I'm just sayin'" assholes:

happy-go-lucky hippie at a farmer's market stand going on and on about "hey you guys need some prices here" first owner says in broken english says yeah our daughter isn't here today. a few moments go by & he starts up again. "how about some prices, lol" " gee it sure would help if there were prices yaknow haha!" second owner patiently explains their daughter makes the signs, they got wet the night before & they didnt have time to make new ones
hippie takes that in his stride.
"well ya know it only takes 2 minutes to make the signs. I'm just sayin"

I lost it & snapped at him "why? are you offering? because these folks do actually seem kinda busy. just sayin" and walked away.

fuck that guy. he got TWO explanations & wouldnt let it go, even though the owners were fully prepared to tell customers prices, no one was complaining except loudmouth goodnatured heyi'mjustaregularguy fuckface. asshole

More than once I've said 'so that's what that low, dull noise was' after someone 'just says'.

I used to get people like that in my restauranting days, always folks who wanted to get the last word. I would deliberately troll then as I was an angry 20-something who enjoyed fucking with people. One exchange went like this:

Customer: "Is this your only salsa?"
Me: "Yes, that's our standard salsa"
Customer: "Good thing you're not charging us for it, because it sucks"
Me: "Well, it's free"
Customer: "Good, cuz it sucks"
Me: "Sorry you feel that way, but we're not charging you for it"
Customer: "Good thing, because it's terrible"
Me: "Well, it's free"
Customer: "I'm glad, cuz it sucks"

at which point her friend said "uhm can we move on from this", embarrassed by her friend's stupid salsa purity crusade

then I said "bonsai", took out an 8-pole diagram, and knocked over their table

That reminds me so much of The Simpsons.

Homer: Relax! I built a bomb shelter.
Lisa: That's not gonna protect us from anything!
Homer: Fine, then don't use it.
Lisa: I won't.
Homer: Good.
Lisa: I know it's good.
Homer: So do I.
Lisa: I'm happy for you.
Homer: You should be!

people who refer to a usb memory stick as "a usb" or a wireless phone headset as "a bluetooth"

People who put the word 'photo' in the file name of a photo (people send photos to our newspaper titled "photo.jpg", srsly), or 'document' in the file name of a document ("document.doc").

ugh yes

there is some program that autosaves all images as photo.jpg. I can't think of what now though

That's true, but you wouldn't believe how many renamed jpg's I get titled "photo of match yesterday.jpg", "photo for the paper.jpg" etc.

I put photo in the filename so people know it's not a photorealistic painting I made

Lol

- that this small, local opera company that I like and want to support doesn't have a freaking mailing list so I can keep abreast of their productions. Come on, now, that is basic promotion right there.

there is some program that autosaves all images as photo.jpg. I can't think of what now though

― educate yourself to this reality (sunny successor), Monday, June 24, 2013 11:13 AM

OMG this is my shitty work life RIGHT NOW. Photos with no usable filenames, emails with "use this photo" and zero caption info, people who forward work pics to me with "reduce file size for easier emailing" turned on, people who USE THEIR GODDAMN PHONES AS THEIR ONLY COMPUTING DEVICES AND APPARENTLY HAVE SUCH GODDAMN THUMB-SPRAINS THAT THEY CAN'T BE BOTHERED TO GIVE ME ANY INFORMATION ABOUT THEIR GODDAMN ADS.

"READ MY FUCKING MIND, DESK JOCKEY"
"NO, YOU READ MY FUCKING MIND, HOW MANY FINGERS DO YOU SEE HERE!? FUUUUUUUUUUCKKKKKKK AS;DLKJFASKJDPWU8ERQWENKCMASNCV/"

When I edited the sports site, I used to get photographers sending me pix from Friday night football games with -

• No information about what was happening in the picture ("Check the school's website. They might have a roster you can identify those guys with.")

• I'd tell them that I could edit the pix to our site's dimensions, and they'd go ahead and try to make that 680 x 480 into a 655 x 472 without bothering with anything like a locked proportion anyway.

• Watermarks as big as your face. Because all worthy news sites carry fucking watermarks all over their art.

People suck so hard. They suck TOO hard. They should suck more gently.

http://a3.typepad.com/6a0133f3c49ce9970b013486e6b23b970c-500pi

http://images.45cat.com/otis-redding-try-a-little-tenderness-stax.jpg

Delivery guys that don't bring pens. I usually try and have one or two on my counter for this reason, but y'know we use em for other things too. and Jimmy Johns guy (shutup) comes like 4 times in a row goin "Whoa, broooooo, do you like, have a peeeeeeeennnnn, I don't have one", and then I gotta dig around for one while smelling the warm food that I am desiring to eat.

Boy, did I misread that first sentence, and including "peeeeeeeennnnn" later on didn't help.

i'm not even gonna ask what kinda deliveries you're getting, phil

people who end emails with 'Happy Monday!!'

there is some program that autosaves all images as photo.jpg. I can't think of what now though

It's called "The iPhone Photos App." JUST ran into this 2 minutes ago when I sent a picture from my iPhone to my work email.

people who end emails with 'Happy Monday!!'

― ljubljana, Monday, June 24, 2013 6:51 PM (38 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

GUILTY but only sarcastically when I'm emailing somebody on Monday morning with a long list of things I need them to do for me, or making some kind of onerous request.

I should probably stop though.

I have seen the light.

I close a lot of emails with "have a good week" or "have a good weekend," but only when it's code for "thank god I don't have to think about you anymore for at least a month."

when a task needs to be completed and you are constantly fighting uphill against people who only focus on their TINY minute part of the task and nooooooooooooo one ever does anything with the whole task in mind and nothing ever gets done, I could kill people seriously

raaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh rage

when you just want someone to believe in you and it feels like no one does

might just be me, but the phrase "must be nice" irks me like no other. Mostly because of how condescending it comes across, ie "Wow, must be nice to have things so easy when the rest of us toil away".

Especially when it's something like telling pepole I work from home, and they go "must be nice". FUCK YOU, I WORKED ALMOST TEN YEARS AT THIS JOB TO EARN THIS PRIVILEGE!

"must be nice to have some financial help from your folks." "no, it's actually fucking horrible. i hate myself every time i have to ask for it."

My usual reply to the condescending/snotty "must be nice" is, "Yep, it is. Stay in a job more than 2 years and you might get some privileges too!"

Heh, I've used that rebuttal sometimes, a little more softly.

I get the "must be nice" mostly frequently from parents when I talk about going out, sleeping in, or travel to fun places. "YES, IT SURE IS" I say to them.

xps - Carl, you have dispensation to use Happy Monday after an onerous request. This is totally acceptable. Harder to pull off with Happy Wednesday, though, which I hate even more than Happy Monday, now I come to think of it.

when you just want someone to believe in you and it feels like no one does

Feeling this pretty hard as a student. You're a student too...

When you've got a deadline to meet but another person needs to submit something to you and that other person's deadline passed LONG ago and that other person doesn't have even a minimally legit reason why you haven't been given that material yet.

My supervisor, who so far has been one of the chillest people I've ever met, today blew up at the person in question. I'd like to take a bath or watch a movie, but I've been told to expect this item to come in tonight. (Just as we've been expecting it for the last three days....)

I know it's tough finding something new on the Web to talk about, so recycling stuff is gonna happen.

But I hate it when subjects over six months old get trotted out with intro lines like "An astronomical artist has created eye-opening illustrations..." Why yes he has. I also hear there's this Spanish painter who has painted a controversial piece of art focused on the tragedy of Guernica.

I know, it's the Daily Mail. They got to my little hobby site about three months after everyone else did, trumpeting its debut and getting nearly every fact in the story wrong. Watch out for October 2013 when that wolf story gets told again.

similar to that, I hate how people don't read dates on articles. so when two events of the same nature (ie, someone eating human flesh) occur in the same timeframe, a number of related articles always pop-up within the week, as the media likes to report like-minded articles, but often many of them are from 6-8 months ago and only get new exposure because of the new trend.

so then I'll see a friend post OMG, WHAT IS GOING ON, THREE PEOPLE HAVE DIED OF AMOEBA WITHIN THE LAST 3 DAYS, and then I'll look at the last article and it's from a year ago.

also, and this is a really lame thing to get angry about, but I hate it when fanboys don't know their own material.

I used to know this girl who was hella into Star Wars, and talked about it all the time. And one time she did a presentation to a group of us about Star Wars, and kept referring to Endor as "Andorra". I'M NOT EVEN A STAR WARS FANBOY AND I KNOW THAT'S WRONG, JEEBUS.

http://talkingwithtami.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/endora-bewitched.jpg

I'm nowhere near that close being a fanboy - I don't think I could stomach someone giving a presentation on Star Wars.

But that said, those little decal stickers you see on the back windshields of SUVs? The ones that illustrate the family members? The stickers that make me IA anyway in the first place?

When I saw the window the other day that had a big Darth Vader, a big Princess Leia next to him, a smaller Luke Skywalker, and an even smaller pet-sized Chewbacca – even I got IA about how fucked up that was on so many different levels.

those little decal stickers you see on the back windshields of SUVs? The ones that illustrate the family members? The stickers that make me IA anyway in the first place?

Oh good, it's not just me then.

I once saw one with a halo over one of the kids' heads. Just wanted to pull over and lay down in the floorboard.

Saw this on a car yesterday:

http://cdn.www.babble.com/wp-content/blog_uploads/18/files/stick-figure-family/stickfigure3.jpg

It took me 15 minutes to understand the signif of the halo, because I wasn't aware that these window-clings were a thing. Actually it took me up until kate posted one.

Oh no was the halo because the child had died????