Po-Faced Absurdity of DC Comics, Part 2: Son of Po-Face

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This is exactly why Marvel and DC should never kill off any iconic characters whatsoever. It's just messy and stupid.

― Matthew C Perpetua (inca), Thursday, 10 March 2005 18:34 (nineteen years ago) link

What's more realistic: characters that exist in a permanent status quo, or characters that come back from the dead in improbable, convoluted ways?

― Matthew C Perpetua (inca), Thursday, 10 March 2005 18:35 (nineteen years ago) link

What's chocolatier?

― Tep (ktepi), Thursday, 10 March 2005 18:36 (nineteen years ago) link

Wait a sec - how DID Green Arrow die?

― David R. (popshots75`), Thursday, 10 March 2005 18:36 (nineteen years ago) link

His arm was trapped in a bomb that was going to explode over ... Metropolis? Superman offered to amputate his arm to save him -- he couldn't be removed from the bomb without the bomb going off, but the bomb could be disarmed (ha) if the arm stayed in it; Ollie elected to die rather than be a one-armed archer. (It's possible Superman wasn't positive he could amputate without the bomb going off, I don't remember.) Huck probably remembers details I'm leaving out.

― Tep (ktepi), Thursday, 10 March 2005 18:42 (nineteen years ago) link

Ha - if only the bomb was over Antartica or North Dakota. "DAMN IT, Clark - I don't CARE about @#!&ing BISMARCK and a bunch of COWS! Just get my ARM of this STUPID BOMB NOW!"

― David R. (popshots75`), Thursday, 10 March 2005 18:45 (nineteen years ago) link

Clearly, from my last post, you can tell that they set GA up the bomb of his arm.

― David R. (popshots75`), Thursday, 10 March 2005 18:48 (nineteen years ago) link

I wasn't reading comics from 91 through 03, so I don't remember. It was sort of an homage to DKR where Ollie appears with an arm missing.

In Brad Meltzer's brief run on Green Arrow, he opened with "I was dead. I came back." And I read that and went ZOWEE, that's good enough for me. Because it's a freakin' comic book.

― Huk-L, Thursday, 10 March 2005 18:49 (nineteen years ago) link

Yeah, that's the kind of thing I meant when I originally said I was going to skip GL Rebirth because I didn't care about the journey, just about getting there: bringing Ollie back, bringing Hal back, in the long run the details aren't important. Now, in the case of Rebirth, that might not prove to be the case -- it's hard to say what the status quo will be when it's done. But that's what I thought would happen, anyway.

― Tep (ktepi), Thursday, 10 March 2005 18:51 (nineteen years ago) link

Way back in 1997 I posted this in response to the question of what a 'good death' for GA would be:

"Ollie is facing off against the terrorists. He gets his
arm stuck, not in a bomb, but in a laundry mangler. Slowly, he is
dragged through. Superman slices the arm away with heat vision and
Ollie takes out fifty terrorists, drawing his bowstring with his
teeth. However, he fails to notice the pump-action shotgun levelled at
his back. The blast blows a hole right through his stomach. Watching
the bloody remains of his spine clattering against the wall, Ollie's
resolve only hardens, hardens like the drying blood pooling on the
floor. Heroic to the last, he drags himself painfully towards the
final terrorist and bites his throat out - recieving a knife right
through his head and a butcher's skewer in his heart. Stabbed through
the BRAIN... stabbed through the HEART... HE WILL NOT DIE!! Only when
he smashes through the cockpit window and drops five thousand feet
onto the Daily Planet globe is the heroic life force of Green Arrow
finally, messily extinguished. All that remains is his beard. "The
guns did not miss him, but we shall!" cries a tearful Superman as he
cradles an unidentified bone.

And if that isn't a 'landmark issue' I don't know what is."

I'm not proud of many posts I made back then, but I'm quite proud of that.

― Vic Fluro, Thursday, 10 March 2005 19:09 (nineteen years ago) link

!!!!

― David R. (popshots75`), Thursday, 10 March 2005 19:11 (nineteen years ago) link

You are my hero.

― Huk-L, Thursday, 10 March 2005 19:13 (nineteen years ago) link

Hoo-boy!
http://www.titanstower.com/assets/whos%20who/dickgrayson/nwingbat416.jpg

― Huk-L, Friday, 11 March 2005 18:01 (nineteen years ago) link

Jim Starlin exploring the love that dare not speak its name! (& that scene happened just a few months before Jason Todd was whacked! oh my!)

― David R. (popshots75`), Friday, 11 March 2005 18:05 (nineteen years ago) link

http://nightwing.superman.ws/oddities/youthfulangst.gif
http://nightwing.superman.ws/adventures/talkintrash.gif

― Huk-L, Friday, 11 March 2005 18:22 (nineteen years ago) link

How did Bruce Wayne Jr. turn into Muhammed Ali?

― Leeeter van den Hoogenband (Leee), Friday, 11 March 2005 20:09 (nineteen years ago) link

Superman has this chamber, you see, and once you close the door...

― Huk-L, Friday, 11 March 2005 20:10 (nineteen years ago) link

http://homepage.mac.com/phantroll/.cv/phantroll/Public/kirbyhardnaked.jpg-link.jpg

― Matthew C Perpetua (inca), Saturday, 12 March 2005 03:40 (nineteen years ago) link

OMG, I should get that panel tattoed on my nads.

― Huk-L, Saturday, 12 March 2005 19:06 (nineteen years ago) link

http://www.somethingawful.com/articles.php?a=2723&p=8

some spoof comic covers - I especially liked the batman wedding one

― Mark C (Markco), Monday, 14 March 2005 11:29 (nineteen years ago) link

Really? The URL "Something Awful" seems rather appropriate. You just can't fake this stuff.

― Matthew C Perpetua (inca), Monday, 14 March 2005 13:03 (nineteen years ago) link

it's monday morning - I take all the laffs I can get

agree that they do not approach the true majesty of genuine 60s comic covers though...

― Mark C (Markco), Monday, 14 March 2005 13:59 (nineteen years ago) link

I kinda liked the World's Least Subtle Innuendo one, which was kind of ironic, because the none of their jokes were very subtle either, and that was their downfall.

― Huk-L, Monday, 14 March 2005 14:31 (nineteen years ago) link

Yeah, it's like doing a 'satire' of a Kirby monster comic or something - what's the point?

― Tom (Groke), Monday, 14 March 2005 14:33 (nineteen years ago) link

"Laughs." (I'm assuming I can't access the SA link from where I currently am - damn you, corporate overlords - which is for the better.)

― David R. (popshots75`), Monday, 14 March 2005 14:40 (nineteen years ago) link

The new 'Comic Chaos' thing they're doing is frankly appallingly bad compared to the excellent first one:

http://www.somethingawful.com/articles.php?a=1809

This had a couple of real golden moments with things like 'Eric Does Not Pay' and the Carly Simon one...

― Vic Fluro, Monday, 14 March 2005 17:27 (nineteen years ago) link

"Gorilla Comes Out Of Fucking Nowhere" wins.

― DV (dirtyvicar), Monday, 14 March 2005 21:29 (nineteen years ago) link

Oh wow.
http://www.comics.org/graphics/covers/1449/400/1449_4_075.jpg

― Huk-L, Wednesday, 16 March 2005 19:48 (nineteen years ago) link

Oh dear. Is that Zatanna? ... is it Darkseid? Is it Paladin?

― Tep (ktepi), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 19:51 (nineteen years ago) link

It's Black Canary.

― Huk-L, Wednesday, 16 March 2005 19:54 (nineteen years ago) link

Oh, whoops. No wonder Green Arrow's so exhausted!

― Tep (ktepi), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 20:07 (nineteen years ago) link

Looks like he got served.

― Huk-L, Wednesday, 16 March 2005 20:09 (nineteen years ago) link

Okay, how did Black Canary manage to take out Superman??????

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 20:43 (nineteen years ago) link

I thought we talked about this on the Science V. Ugliness thread. Blondes (especially leggy blondes) are unassailable.

― Huk-L, Wednesday, 16 March 2005 20:45 (nineteen years ago) link

So basically you are saying that Black Canary has a Kryptonite punani?

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 20:48 (nineteen years ago) link

Once you go green...

― Huk-L, Wednesday, 16 March 2005 20:50 (nineteen years ago) link

... your girlbits get mean?

― David R. (popshots75`), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 21:04 (nineteen years ago) link

haha - i like that she kicked the atom's ass too.

― j blount (papa la bas), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 21:05 (nineteen years ago) link

did she peg ollie?

― j blount (papa la bas), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 21:06 (nineteen years ago) link

From the man-thing that brought you Basic Instinct and Showgirls comes an exploration into the seedier side of superheroes...

http://www.comics.org/graphics/covers/1449/400/1449_4_075.jpg

When the caged bird sings ... LOOK OUT!

Black Canary is ... PLUCKED! (A Joe Eszterhaus Production)

― David R. (popshots75`), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 21:12 (nineteen years ago) link

http://www.comics.org/graphics/covers/1449/400/1449_4_075.jpg

THEY FELL FROM HER QUIM: A JLA special event!

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 16 March 2005 21:22 (nineteen years ago) link

Batman kinda looks like he's ready to go again.

― Matthew C Perpetua (inca), Thursday, 17 March 2005 02:57 (nineteen years ago) link

I like that Superman's costume is still intact (though I guess he didn't get on the tear-away shirts until post-Byrne) and his hair isn't even tussled.

― Huk-L, Thursday, 17 March 2005 14:53 (nineteen years ago) link

Return of the FINGER!!!
http://www.greenarrowfansite.com/reviews/images/WFno210.JPG

― Huk-L, Tuesday, 29 March 2005 15:26 (nineteen years ago) link

I like the fact that even the dog doesn't have a face!

― Tom (Groke), Tuesday, 29 March 2005 21:29 (nineteen years ago) link

That man has no nose!

― Austin Still (Austin, Still), Tuesday, 29 March 2005 22:19 (nineteen years ago) link

Clearly, Ollie's beard acts not just as carbon-dating-like heptitude signifier, but also as face-vanishing-preventor.

― Huk-L, Wednesday, 30 March 2005 05:34 (nineteen years ago) link

I can't believe this hasn't made it yet:
http://www.rzero.com/books/GL-GA-1b.gif
http://www.hushed-whispers.net/bk/justiceleagueunlimited/episodes/initiation/Initiation37.jpg
1http://www.hushed-whispers.net/bk/justiceleagueunlimited/episodes/initiation/Initiation63.jpg

― Huk-L, Wednesday, 30 March 2005 06:16 (nineteen years ago) link

http://www.titanstower.com/assets/whos%20who/dickgrayson/nwingbat416.jpg

The rest of Nightwing's sentence: "...your clone!"

― BARMS, Thursday, 31 March 2005 13:19 (nineteen years ago) link

two weeks pass...

http://www.comics.org/graphics/covers/704/400/704_4_100.jpg

― Huk-L, Tuesday, 19 April 2005 14:58 (nineteen years ago) link

Skipping 24 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

Would it really mess up traffic? If the colours are switched over, it wouldn't make any difference- the sequence would just change from top to bottom to vice versa. (that's in the UK, I don't know how it would work in the US)

― Richard Jones, Thursday, 28 May 2009 11:22 (fourteen years ago) link

Red turns green but green doesn't turn red. So we're down a colour.

― CosMc (Raw Patrick), Thursday, 28 May 2009 11:26 (fourteen years ago) link

Is that Tales of the Unexpected available in a B&W reprint, I wonder. "The Day White Turned to White!"

― chap, Thursday, 28 May 2009 12:24 (fourteen years ago) link

Red turns green but green doesn't turn red. So we're down a colour.

There's so many of those buggers anyway, so who cares? We could just replace red with, say, indigo. It's not like it had much use before.

― Tuomas, Thursday, 28 May 2009 12:36 (fourteen years ago) link

one year passes...

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_dcE1D7cyBDQ/SoYZ02AviVI/AAAAAAAAAFY/Nzn3KGjvxp8/s400/super.bmp

― Tuomas, Tuesday, 28 December 2010 14:04 (thirteen years ago) link

I kinda want to know the context to this, but on the other hand it's perfect as it is.

― Tuomas, Tuesday, 28 December 2010 14:04 (thirteen years ago) link

Oh yes.

― The New Dirty Vicar, Tuesday, 28 December 2010 21:08 (thirteen years ago) link

Context, according to Livejournal, is "It's from a series of 'imaginary stories' in which Kal-El's rocket was found by Thomas and Martha Wayne. They adopted him, named him Bruce and he grew up to be a mild-mannered librarian who works with and romances Barbara Gordon."
http://asylums.insanejournal.com/scans_daily/16278.html

― buildings with goats on the roof (James Morrison), Wednesday, 29 December 2010 07:22 (thirteen years ago) link

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