100 Reasons Why "Ignition - Remix" Is So Damned Great

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36. OK I have to go to work now (it's a quarter 'til seven in the morning), everybody keep the reasons coming

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 10:46 (10 years ago) Permalink

Sam liked 'em young too. Hopefully R. will not share his ultimate fate however.

I'd like to hear R. get busy a capella like on the second track of Night Beat.

― amateurist (amateurist), Sunday, 15 June 2003 10:49 (10 years ago) Permalink

I have to drive 8 hours today and I haven't slept a wink!

― amateurist (amateurist), Sunday, 15 June 2003 10:49 (10 years ago) Permalink

37. YOu don't even need to own a copy to hear it all the time, just turn on the radio, or if you live in the city open the window.

― nick.K (nick.K), Sunday, 15 June 2003 16:07 (10 years ago) Permalink

38. i dislike it profusely

― stevem (blueski), Sunday, 15 June 2003 16:15 (10 years ago) Permalink

39. It makes me want to buy a shotgun.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Sunday, 15 June 2003 16:16 (10 years ago) Permalink

40. stevem and Alex are...The No-Fun Brigade!*

*I have also expressed the same feelings about this song, but I was wrong.

― Neudonym, Sunday, 15 June 2003 16:20 (10 years ago) Permalink

41. Because the video has a 360-degree shot of R.'s incredible braidwork, and a funny "white guy learns to dance" part, and shout-outs to dead homiez.

― Neudonym, Sunday, 15 June 2003 16:22 (10 years ago) Permalink

don't get me wrong - i don't think its THAT bad, i just have no real feeling for it at all thats the problem. it doesn't excite me, it doesn't make me smile or anything. i wouldn't dance or wave a bottle of beer to it. thats not a flaw on my part or a flaw on the part of the song. JOhn makes good points about the track that i appreciate. and if you're able to ignore the fact that R Kelly is a complete tosspot then more power to you.

― stevem (blueski), Sunday, 15 June 2003 16:36 (10 years ago) Permalink

I was a family counselor on Chicago's South Side for a couple of years, and heard a LOT of "R. Kelly being bad" stories (as well as "R. Kelly is a really generous and nice guy" stories) that had NOTHING to do with underaged girls or Hi-8 technology. And I guess I'm pre-disposed to not giving a shit about artists' personal lives when it comes to their music.

42. Because the entire first verse has been reconstructed to sound like it's a prelude to a song that then (once the chorus kicks in) suddenly exists.

― Neudonym, Sunday, 15 June 2003 16:42 (10 years ago) Permalink

Actually, John, you are completely right about the Sam Cooke thing, now that I actually think about it (thanks), although it still takes me out of that particular song a little bit. Amateurist already hit the echo I like, but I would add that (a) the "bounce bounce bounce bounce bounce bounce bounce" sounds less like like casual dancing instruction and more like ballet, and (b) the "hot and fresh out the kitchen" brings out that good-time barbeque vibe something fierce, like this weekend fun is so wholesome that your mother's going to show up with some warm cornbread for everyone.

― nabisco (nabisco), Sunday, 15 June 2003 16:43 (10 years ago) Permalink

43. r kelly does not sport a 'fro in the video

44. r kelly has never once sported a 'fro to my knowledge

45. does this mean he referring to hair, um, elsewhere than his head?

― jess (dubplatestyle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 16:44 (10 years ago) Permalink

he struck me as a complete tosspot long before those stories emerged, for what its worth (apparently nada)

― stevem (blueski), Sunday, 15 June 2003 16:52 (10 years ago) Permalink

46. The way the original "Ignition" seagues into the remix on Chocolate Factory

― Colin Beckett (Colin Beckett), Sunday, 15 June 2003 17:11 (10 years ago) Permalink

stevem: just to clarify, I'm sure he IS a complete tosspot. but I don't really care when it comes to great singles.

― Neudonym, Sunday, 15 June 2003 17:20 (10 years ago) Permalink

47. Toot toot.

― Vinnie (vprabhu), Sunday, 15 June 2003 17:26 (10 years ago) Permalink

but I don't really care when it comes to great singles.

as another aside, i feel this IS the correct way to think about it...but still i doubt i will ever like the song.

― stevem (blueski), Sunday, 15 June 2003 17:38 (10 years ago) Permalink

48. Beep beep.

― Arthur (Arthur), Sunday, 15 June 2003 17:51 (10 years ago) Permalink

back around the time the album dropped, a few stations here would play the whole thing, original and remix, all in a row, as the 6-minute epic it is. i love both, but they really sound their best together.

― Al (sitcom), Sunday, 15 June 2003 17:53 (10 years ago) Permalink

OK so after reading this fine thread I decided to download a copy of the track, and HOLY SHIT! knocked my socks off! I'd heard it before in various background-music environments but never paid attention/realized what it was. I think I'm in love.

I'm totally with #7. I love that he identifies the song as a remix--it's a song about itself!

― s1utsky (slutsky), Sunday, 15 June 2003 17:54 (10 years ago) Permalink

49) The 'stirring dance'

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 15 June 2003 17:55 (10 years ago) Permalink

he's just demonstrating that it is indeed hot and fresh out the kitchen

― Al (sitcom), Sunday, 15 June 2003 17:59 (10 years ago) Permalink

Exactly. Greatness.

Plus:

50) His green-and-white wristband.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Sunday, 15 June 2003 18:07 (10 years ago) Permalink

I kiss all of you so much right now.

― Cozen (Cozen), Sunday, 15 June 2003 18:30 (10 years ago) Permalink

51. The very second before a Hip Hop artist (with a huge 'fro') was about to go on stage came over and confessed his love for the track, knowing that I loved it. A memorable moment for me as it was a risky time, months before the anyone had broken cover and rhapsodised about it.

52. It doesn't sound like a 'real' song, rather some studio experiment, or album interlude.

― nick.K (nick.K), Sunday, 15 June 2003 19:01 (10 years ago) Permalink

BUT i'd normally cross oceans to avoid kelly but i accidentally heard this tune in the megastore today and christ, it's brilliant for abt 43 of the reasons described above. i will now have to reappraise my entire life.

― kieron, Sunday, 15 June 2003 19:04 (10 years ago) Permalink

53. ok I'm back

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 19:35 (10 years ago) Permalink

Wow. Brilliant thread, John. Somehow I haven't heard this song before just now, I just downloaded it because of this thread. (I listen to virtually no radio aside from WFMU these days, and I've never heard it on MTV or BET while channel surfing.) Thank you! It's a wonderful song.

― Matthew Perpetua (Matthew Perpetua), Sunday, 15 June 2003 19:36 (10 years ago) Permalink

54. There's the sudden change in vocal tone in the chorus, right at "mama rollin' that body" - where R Kelly reveals himself to be not just a consummate soul singer, but a pretty clued-in one. Loop that damned line. "Mama rollin' that body": who's that? It's not Kelly. I mean it is him singing, but whose moves is he copping?

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 19:45 (10 years ago) Permalink

55. reggae, it's something reggae: dancehall specifically

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 19:45 (10 years ago) Permalink

56. Elephant Man? No, gentler

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 19:45 (10 years ago) Permalink

57. Ini Kamoze? No, that was what I thought, too, but no

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 19:49 (10 years ago) Permalink

yeah, I thought the same thing--but I can't really identify what artist

― s1utsky (slutsky), Sunday, 15 June 2003 19:54 (10 years ago) Permalink

58. Oh Christ it's Shaggy, where the hell did that come from?

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 19:55 (10 years ago) Permalink

59. Would anybody who's not comfortable with having their contributions posted as part of my weekly Last Plane to Jakarta update please say so before the thread's over, thanks

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 19:56 (10 years ago) Permalink

60. Yes I am aware that technically speaking that last one is not a reason why "Ignition - Remix" is so damned great, and neither is this one for that matter

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 19:57 (10 years ago) Permalink

61. But hey, what can you do?

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 19:57 (10 years ago) Permalink

62. Anyhow

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 19:57 (10 years ago) Permalink

63. (note also that the whole feel of the remix owes a fair amount to Buju Banton, of all people)

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 19:58 (10 years ago) Permalink

64. let's posit that somebody involved with this record has heard some dancehall

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 20:02 (10 years ago) Permalink

65. and let's further posit that R Kelly is that guy, which is a lot more probable than the "oh-but-he's-do-dumb" crowd would like to admit, but all the disparate elements in his style suggest either the happiest accident of all time or a remarkable keen ear for when to put what where

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 20:04 (10 years ago) Permalink

66. I actually hear a little bit of Prince in it. I can't be too specific or refer to any particular song (though I could hear the backing track fitting in fairly well on Sign O The Times), but it's a general feeling. Maybe it's the keyboards. Like the best Prince songs, it has an ability to make you feel vicariously smooth and sexy, even if you are not a particularly smooth or sexy person.

― Matthew Perpetua (Matthew Perpetua), Sunday, 15 June 2003 20:04 (10 years ago) Permalink

Why would anyone doubt that R Kelly has heard some dancehall?

― s1utsky (slutsky), Sunday, 15 June 2003 20:05 (10 years ago) Permalink

67. Spot-on Matthew, Prince is in here

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 20:05 (10 years ago) Permalink

68. So's Curtis Mayfield

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 20:05 (10 years ago) Permalink

...the glasses...because he wants to

― s.r.w. (s.r.w.), Sunday, 15 June 2003 20:06 (10 years ago) Permalink

69. And Marvin' freaking GAYE

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 20:06 (10 years ago) Permalink

70. So we've got the feeling of lots of reggae that most Americans have sadly missed just ripping across the front of the track, and this dumb weekend lyric that's not actually dumb, hitting-on-a-dozen-points vocals flexing so effortless that you might be forgiven for thinking it was guileless

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 20:08 (10 years ago) Permalink

71. since after all that effect is the point

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Sunday, 15 June 2003 20:08 (10 years ago) Permalink

69. that 180 degree head shot in the video is classic.

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Sunday, 15 June 2003 20:09 (10 years ago) Permalink

Skipping 266 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

yeah I was DJ'ing for some kids one time early 2004 and I accidentally played the original version. they were like literally teenagers though so i think i cared more than they did.

― billstevejim, Wednesday, 23 January 2013 17:20 (4 months ago) Permalink

There was no "Sex In The Kitchen" (orig mix) though, was there?

― ( ͡° ͜ʖ͡°) (sic), Wednesday, 23 January 2013 21:07 (4 months ago) Permalink

these songs are on platinum-selling albums guys, jeez

― Doctor No Cassie (some dude), Wednesday, 23 January 2013 21:26 (4 months ago) Permalink

this is like when kids think the Jerry Lewis voice was originated by The Animaniacs

― Doctor No Cassie (some dude), Wednesday, 23 January 2013 21:26 (4 months ago) Permalink

I feel sorry for anyone not familiar with the joys of "GIRL. I'M. READY. TO. TOSS. YOUR. SALAD." tbh

― The Reverend, Wednesday, 23 January 2013 22:10 (4 months ago) Permalink

just remembered this topped Stylus' best-of-decade list three years ago.

― the little prince of inane false binary hype (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, 23 January 2013 22:10 (4 months ago) Permalink

haha i knew al was gonna flip at that post

― k3vin k., Wednesday, 23 January 2013 22:40 (4 months ago) Permalink

Okay, but there was no "Snake" (orig mix) though, was there?

― ( ͡° ͜ʖ͡°) (sic), Wednesday, 23 January 2013 22:48 (4 months ago) Permalink

― 乒乓, Sunday, 27 January 2013 05:28 (4 months ago) Permalink

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