― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 20 June 2005 23:18 (eighteen years ago) link
― Eric H: not a troll, with one exception (Eric H.), Monday, 20 June 2005 23:23 (eighteen years ago) link
― Shakey Mo Collier, Monday, 20 June 2005 23:27 (eighteen years ago) link
"OMG BRUCE WAYNE IS BATMAN!"
― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 20 June 2005 23:29 (eighteen years ago) link
― Shakey Mo Collier, Monday, 20 June 2005 23:30 (eighteen years ago) link
― Shakey Mo Collier, Monday, 20 June 2005 23:32 (eighteen years ago) link
Imagine him doing this one."OMG BRUCE WAYNE IS BATMAN!"
And yet I'm reading scores of defenses for this film's elementary chronological juggling and its lame fight scenes.
― Eric H: not a troll, with one exception (Eric H.), Monday, 20 June 2005 23:36 (eighteen years ago) link
― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 20 June 2005 23:42 (eighteen years ago) link
― walter kranz (walterkranz), Monday, 20 June 2005 23:53 (eighteen years ago) link
― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 20 June 2005 23:58 (eighteen years ago) link
http://newsimg.bbc.co.uk/media/images/40641000/jpg/_40641684_cruise203.jpg
CRUISEBOT CARES NOT THAT HOLMESBOT IS NOT RECAST. CRUISEBOT HAS OTHER THINGS TO DO. I ACKNOWLEDGE CROWD.
― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 00:02 (eighteen years ago) link
True.
― Eric H: not a troll, with one exception (Eric H.), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 00:11 (eighteen years ago) link
Ah yes, the Trickster. Sub-Riddler character.
oh man. the riddler is already so sub-joker.
― s1ocki (slutsky), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 00:17 (eighteen years ago) link
― Semaphore Burns (nordicskilla), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 00:46 (eighteen years ago) link
― giboyeux (skowly), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 00:55 (eighteen years ago) link
Sir, at heart I am only cruel to you.
― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 01:01 (eighteen years ago) link
OW MY BRANE
― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 02:04 (eighteen years ago) link
― walter kranz (walterkranz), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 02:07 (eighteen years ago) link
― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 02:42 (eighteen years ago) link
He keeps this body morphing shit up, he'll kill himself. To go from less-than-dead to buff, well, I imagine that for months he:
Woke up at 4AM. Shoot up steroids, drink a shitload of protein, aerobics for an hour, pass out.
6AM. Woke up, sho0t up with Human Growth Hormone, more aerobics, eat some high calorie meal, pass out.
8 AM. Wake up, take more androgens, puke, pump iron for a few hours, answer email briskly.
Noon. More iron pumping, probably more drugs.
2PM. Another big meal.
3PM. Boxing, or some other stretch/pull excercize, perhaps enhanced by some sort of speedish drug.
5 PM. 3 steaks.
7PM - 8PM. Vibrate; take some Xanex.
8:30. Puke.
9PM. Watch Val Kilmer BATMAN, hiss "Pussy!", pass out.
Repeat for several months, no days off.
― Ian in Brooklyn, Tuesday, 21 June 2005 03:57 (eighteen years ago) link
― Amateur(ist) (Amateur(ist)), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 04:00 (eighteen years ago) link
― Ian in Brooklyn, Tuesday, 21 June 2005 04:27 (eighteen years ago) link
― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 06:14 (eighteen years ago) link
The whole beginning was just...MY KINGDOM FOR A CONCRETE NOUN. Control your fear, my anger outweighs by fear, vengeance your truth, all this grandiose talk that added up to jack shit. Between this and Episode One I'm surprised Liam Neeson hasn't jumped off a roof. Morgan Freeman bringing amiable warmth to a movie is right up there with me taking a good shit after eating taco bell in the Not News department. Michael Caine got shouldered with the rare and clumsy capper quips. Christian Bale was passable as Bruce Wayne but added little and JESUS CHRIST his Batman voice is hysterical. He already sounds a tad awkward anyway but when he gravels up and goes for ominous he's just pathetic. Michael Keaton did a way better job giving Batman a personality.
Aside from a few early moments with Thomas Wayne (well cast) and maybe Gordon (Gary Oldman was the only actor who seemed really intriguing in the parts I caught, sort of reminded me of Laurence Olivier in The Boys From Brazil in his determination to not just coast on skills a la Caine and Freeman but have something going under the surface despite being in an overwraught joke of a movie), the scenes just zipped along without gripping me despite their weighty tone. Actually it might be BECAUSE of that tone. I know a lot of people are anxious for a 'serious' Batman movie but Batman and all superheroes are to some degree completely ludicrous. It's hard to look at a LIVE HUMAN wearing that outfit and not giggle, ESPECIALLY when they're being excruciatingly earnest, and this movie seemed to be under the notion that we were at church.
I have a hard time believing this movie is gonna have legs at the theatre, but hey evidently people like draggy, self-serious tripe. I did like Holmes' homage to the batnipples.
― miccio (miccio), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 12:45 (eighteen years ago) link
― miccio (miccio), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 12:46 (eighteen years ago) link
Can you point me at a movie that is enjoyable if you sleep through half of it?
― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 12:48 (eighteen years ago) link
DAMN YOU DANG!
― David R. (popshots75`), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 12:49 (eighteen years ago) link
(xpost: HAHA)
― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 12:49 (eighteen years ago) link
― David R. (popshots75`), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 12:50 (eighteen years ago) link
― miccio (miccio), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 12:51 (eighteen years ago) link
― miccio (miccio), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 12:52 (eighteen years ago) link
― David R. (popshots75`), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 12:53 (eighteen years ago) link
― Austin Still (Austin, Still), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 12:54 (eighteen years ago) link
― David R. (popshots75`), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 12:55 (eighteen years ago) link
x-post dude I was SO paying attention to the movie. I wasn't blitzed off my gourd.
― miccio (miccio), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 12:56 (eighteen years ago) link
"Oh god no! I fell asleep five minutes in! The music were awful, the lyrics were laughable, the costumes were ludicrous, and the blocking was from a public-school talent show. Nighttrain?"
― David R. (popshots75`), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 12:57 (eighteen years ago) link
― David R. (popshots75`), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 12:58 (eighteen years ago) link
― miccio (miccio), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 12:58 (eighteen years ago) link
― Tom (Groke), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 12:58 (eighteen years ago) link
― miccio (miccio), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 12:59 (eighteen years ago) link
― Tom (Groke), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 13:03 (eighteen years ago) link
― Austin Still (Austin, Still), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 13:06 (eighteen years ago) link
Miccio wins!
― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 13:08 (eighteen years ago) link
― miccio (miccio), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 13:09 (eighteen years ago) link
(xpost: Tom, I don't know exactly how much I'd have to drink before voluntarily watching "The Hunger" but I suspect it might put me in the hospital.)
― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 13:11 (eighteen years ago) link
― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 13:12 (eighteen years ago) link
Dammit how come I remember the exact track order of Morrissey albums and not the names of lesbian vampire films?
BTW if Miccio had posted saying "I walked out halfway through, it was shit and here's why" would people still complain? I agree the "easy dismissal" comment was way cheeky.
― Tom (Groke), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 13:13 (eighteen years ago) link
Tom, please to research the name of this "lesbian vampire" movie so I can get my post-work alcopop schwerve on. (Oh dang was it some Deneuve / Sarandon nookie? Oh yeah.)
― David R. (popshots75`), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 13:13 (eighteen years ago) link
― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 21 June 2005 13:14 (eighteen years ago) link
ESPECIALLY the batmobile. The batmobile ESPECIALLY.
NB: I have always hated Batman.
― TOMBOT, Tuesday, 21 June 2005 13:15 (eighteen years ago) link