They're Remaking 'Alien' -- the 'Prometheus' thread

everyone has their own opinion but alien/aliens are IN NO WAY as dumb/contrived/c-grade as prometheus

"Alien" works better because, duh, they all learned the lessons illustrated in "Prometheus." Worry about contamination, when an alien lizard creature rears its head don't try to pet it, join your local outerspace worker's union to avoid Company exploitation, etc.

ha

there is no way prometheus is as dumb as alien or aliens, which are careful and nuanced studies of corporate culture under stress in the vein of robocop and terminator

...

say what now

i think that's a typo tbf

I sure hope so

Can we open the airlock just in case

depends on if tlg's coming in or leaving, i say be prepared in any case

"sorry but david was such a dumb character, as ok as fassbender played him"

bishop and ash are pretty dumb characters, too, but the actors really sold them in a compelling way. three out of four distinct compelling robot performances is a pretty good record.

harsh on charlize

ok here's my director's cut

remove all jesus shit and focus on prometheus myth. guy pearce appears often as young guy pearce in hologram. he is actually a skeletal monstrosity in a lifepod. he is yr basic dr morbius mad scientist with david as amoral altaira and charlize as macready and idris as pris (yr basic pleasure model). the alien thing is actually an STD propagated by engineers. all the caricature remaining ethnic / ignorant / superstitious / curious george red shirt and scientist dudes all die way earlier from more memorable ways including sensitive crying dude who never impregnates noomi. he should just crumble into dust already and seed the planet with doe-eyed rodents. the nanotech dna virus might fuck up the hull of the ship and kill more people with melting helmets and final destination part 4 / jaws 3d plausible natural disasters. this includes everyone who got killed by roundhouse punches from zombies. the engineer is actually totally reasonable and is actually deep down alot like a draag. but he turns out to be a replicant too and when he impregnates noomi the baby turns out to be a facehugger egg that bursts onto skeletal guy pearce and produces the alien which ultimately just gets let loose on the planet with an escaping engineer who goes to LV 426 BOOM DONE

the crew of the ship could be in a spinoff tv series and david and charlize could be a cartoon network show

i'm in

anyway i'm just kidding it would be better if the engineer characters were just completed unrelated to hr giger

*actually*

leave the engineers but just expunge any reference to facehuggers and chestbursters and never have them show up or wake up, i'm sure fassbender could handle the flute

first way i can think of improving this movie is that none of them wake up

just a bit of robofass pottering

ie performing some of the better-known routines from the ouevre of dennis potter

anyway an advanced alien culture with only one type of WMD is like an old dog with only one trick

just have it be something different and interesting

like this

http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ldjbxuZa6c1qf0aafo1_500.jpg

http://f.hypotheses.org/wp-content/blogs.dir/624/files/2012/03/Escale-%C3%A0-Pharagonescia.jpg

SPLOZZ

castro assassination plan #253 imo

Maybe this has been mentioned upthread but is it consensus that Prometheus retcons the eggs in Alien to be the canisters?

i can't see why it would be. the eggs hatch facehuggers and the canisters leak black goo. also the eggs are eggs and the canisters are canisters. plus it's a pred ship.

Yeah, these dudes deal in bio weapons. Nothing saying they always have to be transporting the exact same bioweapon every time.

I just thought... if the engineers made us - WHO MADE THE ENGINEERS?

Oh crap, 5 seconds ago that was a shit gag in my mind, now I think it could be where lindelof actually wants to go with the sequel.

Imagineers

headband dude

YAPHET

KOTTO.

CALL HIM BY HIS NAME, HE'S AN AFRICAN PRINCE

otm

lol at "Imagineers"

Oh man think of how next level this would have been if it was Walt Disney secretly frozen on the ship instead of Weyland.

You know, what we're really missing these days is cool comic book adaptations of movies. Downloaded the original Alien one the other day, pretty cool.

http://images.wikia.com/marveldatabase/images/3/36/Marvel_Comics_Super_Special_Vol_1_17.jpg

I own this.

I was reading <A href="http://www.darkhorse.com/Books/15-027/Aliens-Omnibus-Volume-3";>a collection of stories in the Alien universe</a> last weekend, they're impressively bleak and down on plucky humans.

not the onion

http://badassdigest.com/2012/07/03/seattle-ticket-taker-spoils-prometheus-on-moral-grounds/

hehe wonder which red state's going to sponsor that bill

well we're just going to warning-sticker movies the same way we're warning-sticker-ing soda and cigarettes

hmm... so based on "just doing my job ma'am" bit I can see how management might have put him up to it to forestall rants from crazy pro-lifers. the bigger problem here is, it's not an abortion! it's a caesarean, and iirc the miracle baby gets on quite nicely post-procedure.

haaaaaaaaa

"at first everyone treated him like a freak, but then they understood why god had let him live"

the only way this would be acceptable is if the dude spoiled it by singing 'bodies' in full-on jonny rotten voice. and also if the ticket-taker was johnny rotten.

noomi and fass as joshua and caleb accepting their inheritance and marching into hebron to face the children of giants as a test of faith in god's grace

I feel like the ticket-taker may have been trolling considering it's a big ol' squiddy parasite. Still, pretty hilarious

Because Poe's Law is standard operating procedure, sullen teenager behavior is indistinguishable from earnest rightwing religious types

I haven't seen prometheus yet, but I've seen an awful lot of spongebob

https://sphotos.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/523538_10150890935797261_1474100003_n.jpg

omg

it occurred to me while i was watching it!

lol

this was both better and worse than i was expecting

really glad i went in with low/no expectations

found it really beautifully shot and designed, a couple good performances, a bunch of interesting ideas, and tons of plot points handled unbelievably poorly