people that YELP are scumbags

someone should start yelp reviews reviews and all the reviews should be 'this person would be horrible to dine with'

Mine would be "Her name made me think she was Chinese but after we had dinner together I realized she totally wasn't, what a scam"

i've been meaning to suggest same for a while! yelper.com

or maybe whine.com

or just a tumblr of good'uns. that seems to do the trick these days.

The thing is, the site does perform a public service, in that if you meet somebody and find out they use yelp, you can find out within like a minute or so if they have sane and useful opinions or are a horrible pain in the ass. Presumably you could also find this out by talking to them, but smartphones are so much faster anymore.

your use of "anymore" fascinates me

Google "positive anymore", marvel at its alien weirdness

yeah, i started noticing that usage a few years back and it really threw me for a loop

i'm thinking i'm on the verge of starting to use it tho

steven soderbergh's rolodex must be really fucking out there

whoops rong thread

haha, i'm not sure where i picked it up cause it's something that used to bug me too! Is it a Midwestern thing? It's definitely not like hip new slang, it's an old-school regular-workin-people thing.

it doesn't make any sense!

i think it makes a certain amount of sense. divorces "anymore" from the mechanics of its original construction in order to apply its function to other contexts.

Anymore, you take sense where you can find it.

I live in the Midwest and have never heard this

http://microsyntax.sites.yale.edu/positive-anymore

Hey, cool, it has a name! Good to know.

http://www.yelp.com/user_details?userid=txCfYYYzxoIbMTfpz2Tn_w

this guy

that dude is REALLY unhappy in life

omg this guy

Yelp

Categories: Local Flavor, Mass Media
Neighborhood: SOMA
1.0 star rating
9/26/2011

Aah Yelp. You have lost your way. Alas, so has the country so why should you be any different? What I thought Yelp was or is, and what Yelp believes it is are two entirely different entities. To me, Yelp was an online community of people who would venture out to restaurants, bars any business really, and evaluate them fairly and honestly for others to read. No one makes one read my review, and certainly no one has to take what I saw as the truth. To one person, I may be funny and dead on, to the next person, I am just a mean a-hole. It doesn't matter, its just my opinion.

The point is, if I am reviewing something, someplace or someone, and I tell you how awful they were, it is because they were. What that business now does is whine to Yelp. They either create a fake profile, or someone who works for them has a profile, or someone contacts Yelp and cries. The business should be ashamed of themselves. Instead of offering up good service, they cry about a review someone writes. It is my opinion Yelp. You don't have to like it, the business doesn't have to like it, but it is my opinion. Do you think by deleting it from Yelp I change my mind about the establishment. No. I am more determined to tell people how bad the experience was.

I have had reviews removed about three or four times. I always get the same BS email from someone at Yelp who is such a coward, they write from an email address, that can't be replied to. The most recent occasion occurred today.

Someone decided that my review of Rufus DuMonde Dog grooming in Madison, Wisconsin was not to their liking, so they contacted Yelp and Yelp, being a shill for business, removed it. Why? The place is horrible. If you remove my review does that change the quality of their service? Why is Rufus DuMonde such a coward that they don't contact me? It would be far better for them to contact me and offer another opportunity to show me I am wrong. Instead, they whine to Yelp. You can cover up shit in a patina, but the shit is still there, and it still stinks. It doesn't matter how many businesses make Yelp remove bad reviews. If the business or service is getting a bad review, having Yelp remove it, doesn't mean the service improved. On the contrary.

For every review you remove of mine, I will find a way to get the word out much louder. Rufus DuMonde, and all the other horrible establishments I have frequented, you can continue to hide behind the skirt of Yelp, but it won't help you.

"rufus dumonde dog grooming" in madison cannot POSSIBLY be real

(xp from unhappy guy above)

I walked into this dirt hole, holding my breath and tongue, and willing to order something in the hope that I could find some good Mexican food (good Mexican food is actually an oxymoron)

It would be far better for them to contact me and offer another opportunity to show me I am wrong. Instead, they whine to Yelp.

oh the irony

this dude is my new favorite person, it's just pages and pages of misdirected bitching

http://www.rufusdumonde.com/

by the way.

nice FAKE website

Location
Beverly Hills, CA

The City of Los Angeles
Category: Public Services & Government
11/21/2009
It gets one star because I have to give it at least one star, not because it deserves any stars. In fact, it owes me stars. It is the worst city in the world. A hole. A shit hole, and just when you think that hole stinks and couldn't get any worse, you discover that LA actually has a part that is worse then itself, the valley.

Having never been to LA or California before, and relocating from New York three years ago, I discovered it was the biggest mistake of my life. I yearn every day to leave. I don't think I can take it anymore, I hate LA. Randy Newman is an idiot.

There is nothing really remarkable about this city. Who cares about the beaches or the f'**in palm trees. Beaches? Just fill my bathtub up with water and throw sand around the outside of it. A beach is born. When you walk down a street in New York you feel alive. The energy from the people that pass you, the steam arising from the subway grates, the sounds of cars, horns, sirens, the smell of the carts roasting chestnuts - is there anything better. As you get close to major venues, your heart beats just a bit quicker, walk past Madison Square Garden and you realize that you are walking past sporting history.

Walk in LA. You pass some taco truck or some woman selling what appears to be fruit? No energy. Nothing. This city is dead. It looks dead, it smells dead. It is dead. God, or the heavens or mother earth or whomever controls these things hates LA. Earthquakes, fires, mudslides, how much more do you need? The people here are so freaking dumb they don't get it, those are signs to get the hell out, but they stay and marvel at what? The Hollywood sign? The Grove? A man made neighborhood because LA doesn't really have any.

There is traffic because no one, I will repeat NO ONE knows how to drive. They may have once been educated in the art, but when they moved from Ohio with dreams of becoming an actress, they quickly assimilated to so-Cal and completely dumbed down. The traffic doesn't move. Its not congestion like in NY, it just doesn't move. No one drives, they cruise, apparently everyone has all the time in the world, no one has to get anywhere on time.

Look, its that amazing skyline. What skyline? If you see the Los Angeles skyline in a movie, you wouldn't even know it.

I think I will take the bus today. There is a Metro system right? Yes, it just doesn't run anywhere you need to go, it might require seven buses to get there and none of them will run ON TIME!

The food is disgusting. Not a decent restaurant anywhere. Not one restaurant in Los Angeles could compare to anything in New York. Don't get me started on pizza or bagels. Some fool by the name of David Sax just wrote a book declaring LA has the best delis. Sax is Canadian, he doesn't know a deli if it smacked him in the head. He grew up in Toronto knowing Shopsy's and Switzers. He thinks Kosher is Chicago 58 and Pearls. His first Croissant came from Health Bread or Open Window. Take your book David Sax and stick it you know where. Don't tell me about the amazing Mexican restaurants, or the fact that New York doesn't have good Mexican food. Thank goodness. Mexican food is not good food. No great chef masters Mexican cooking. New York, Rome or Paris don't suffer from the lack of a taco.

I would love to offer some words of niceness to this city, but I can't. There is no city in the world that is more disgusting than Los Angeles. From Alvarado Street and Western to Ventura Boulevard, there is nothing memorable or redeeming about this place. The atmosphere, the people, it is an all encompassing hole of deviance and immorality.

Nobody ever sang if you can make it in LA you can make it anywhere. Los Angeles, and California is like the United State's penal colony. It was to the US what Australia was to England. The west was for people that didn't have the ability to truly make it in the east and they tread westward because they didn't want to have to compete. They wanted to create their own rules, live on their terms, and it certainly shows in the manners, the lack of civility and class that embodies the majority of Los Angeles. Yes, there is the Getty, but there is also Encino, Tarzana and Woodland Hills. My point proved.

I know there will be those who will attack me. They will want to tell me about the weather (it never changes), or something else, but really think about it. You don't have to admit it, but think about when was the last time you got really great customer service in Los Angeles. You didn't. If you start with shit, you can only attract flies and maggots.

When I leave, and it will be soon, I will NEVER come back. You can keep this shit hole and everything and everyone it contains.

http://twentyfourframes.files.wordpress.com/2009/08/travis-bickle-goes-to-the-movies.jpg

Wait, I thought I was crossposting but the Rufus Du Mode guy is the same guy who hates Mexican food!

I'm obsessed with the fact that he capitalizes "Croissant"

he hates everything!

"There was no fresh smell on my dog like there should be for a few days after a complete grooming"

This guy lived in Madison for a time and I have to concede that his reviews are not totally wrong, e.g. he understands that Culver's is better than In and Out (though in his case this may reflect his burning LA-hatred more than objective burger assessment) and Pedro's is just as bad as he says it is.

he went to a pizza place called giorgio's in milton, wi

FUCK YOU TWO STARS

xp oh i didn't pick up that he was in madison for a while haha

even his 5 star reviews burn with hate:
Thank you Pietro, for actually serving really outstanding food in one of the worst, dismal cities in the United States. Awesome is an adjective that still doesn't do this place justice. The pasta was delicious, the gravy was sweet, like it should be. The chicken was tender, I have nothing bad to say about this place, except that it is in Madison, WI instead of north Jersey, where this place would be home.

After having to experience one of the worst restaurants in Madison, WI (Pedro's), it was a pleasure to visit and write about this one.

wait wait

La Conversation

Categories: Bakeries, Cafes
5.0 star rating
7/26/2008
I wasn't going to write a review of this place. Seemed silly, it is so good, and is always busy so why does anyone need to know what I think. Then I saw that people are saying it is expensive, its crowded, they are not giving it five stars??? SHAME! SHAME on all of you. If you can't say anything nice, do not say anything at all. This place is incredible. For those who know me, you know I hate LA and I hate California. I long to be back east where life and the people are normal. But I lament, anyway, there are a few places that wil make me forget how much I despise being here. THIS is one of them. Urth Cafe is another. La Conversation is my happy place. Going next door to B2V and having Kim color my hair is another happy place. La Conversation was one of the first places I went to when I moved to LA. I have such fondness in my heart for this place. I love it. Everything on the menu is fantastic, lunch or breakfast. Some of the bakery items are better than others. lemon bars are to do die for, as are the linzer cookies. Really great restaurant/cafe.

getting a real 'angling for a book deal' feeling from a lot of his screeds esp the one about LA

The chicken was tender, I have nothing bad to say about this place, except that it is in Madison, WI instead of north Jersey, where this place would be home.

By the way, I like this restaurant too, but I like it for being an exact replica of the mediocre red-checked-tablecloth Italian places in New Jersey. I would describe the food as "entirely satisfying."

Unless he is 85 I consider his use of "gravy" here to be an affectation.

you know that at every single one of these restaurants, he's meek and agreeable no matter what happens, then runs home and vents bile into his computer

Having never been to LA or California before, and relocating from New York three years ago, I discovered it was the biggest mistake of my life. I yearn every day to leave. I don't think I can take it anymore, I hate LA. Randy Newman is an idiot.

a+

i've actually wondered about that place in madison. maybe i'll give it a shot.

Aah Yelp. You have lost your way. Alas, so has the country so why should you be any different?

straight up amazing

Oregano's, you screwed me. The first time I went here, I went based upon someone's recommendation. I wrote you a fair balanced review and in turn, I thought we had an understanding. I wouldn't rip you a new one and you would insure that if I ever came back, you would provide some consistency to he food. I never said your food was stellar, I just wanted to get the same crap I got the first time. I upheld my end of the bargain, you took my fair review and screwed me.

honestly i think the worst thing about this site, aside from the sense of entitlement, is that everybody writes like they're getting paid by the word - - - an ordinary human would just write "I had a good experience here once, but recently went back and was disappointed."

On my second visit, I ordered a meatball sub, again. I wanted the Jr. The same as I had before when you included the waffle fries that were not needed. This time you served me a whole sub, not what I wanted and there were no fries. I didn't want them, but where were they? How was the sub? Yuck! I could have got a better meatball sub at Subway. Do you understand how insulting that comment was? Oregano's, I said Subway. That is bad, dude! Bad!! I guess what we have determined is that you just suck. You are another horrible, fake Italian restaurant, serving food that Chef Boyardee would be ashamed to put his face on.

Oh yeah, where was the cute blonde at the register? If you are going to serve bad food, always make sure there is a cute blonde serving me, not a fat guy with glasses in a white t-shirt. That just makes the whole experience even worse.

you can seriously pick one of this guy's reviews virtually at random and be sure of something horrible happening to you

Interesting that a restaurant that has the chutzpah to declare itself as "The Good Egg" would at least prepare a good egg. Not so.

>_<

OMFG! They can't even make oatmeal. It's 7:20 am and I find myself at Scottsdale Road and the 101. My options for a business breakfast range from Chik-Fil-A (NOT!) to the bangladesh Wendy's. The pickings are very slim. If I venture down Scottsdale Road, I am facing not much more, Village Inn? So I hold my breath, bite my tongue and decide if I get the coffee at Starbucks, I can find something benign to order for breakfast. Oatmeal. How can they mess this up? Everyone is making it now. Burger King, Au Bon Pain, even McDonalds found a way to serve oatmeal. Albeit, the McDonald's oatmeal is milky, and has hard apple bits but it resembles oatmeal more than Paradise bakery's. This was a quinoa salad, I am sure it was. It had no resemblance to oatmeal. It tasted more like a cup of couscous or quinoa with cinnamon and obscene pecans dumped on top. Dear Paradise, chop your pecans. Please. I am sure Juan could chop the pecans right before he chops the lettuce. Next, instead of dumping the can of cinnamon on the oatmeal, how about using candied pecans. The crunch and sweetness of the pecans would be the natural sweetness to the oatmeal. Finally, go buy oatmeal, real oatmeal, not couscous or quinoa. This was the worst oatmeal I have ever had, anywhere! You amaze me as to how bad you get every time I make the mistake of visiting. I almost want to make it a challenge. I might start to frequent you more just so I can see how low you can go. Game on!

Is there really not a system on this site for policing people who post offensive racist shit?

okay i'll stop but seriously, THIS FUCKING GUY

I have to find a new friend to go bike (Schwinn, not something cool like a Harley) riding with. This is the second time I have been dragged to a Paradise Bakery at breakfast time. I can't take it anymore. There was a review for another location where the reviewer says it looks when you step in the door that Paradise has promise. That is so true.

WHO IN THE FUCK CAAAAAAAAAAAARES

This is not really a review of Subway, as Subway in itself is disgusting. Why anyone thinks over-processed luncheon meat is good is beyond me. Actually Subway found a way to make things even worse. They used to sell fresh avocado on the sandwich. Now, they use a disgusting, bland green glop that resembles guacamole but tastes worse than Elmer's Glue. Have you ever noticed the odd smell that accompanies a Subway?

Anyway, this review is specifically about this location. To the short, fat ugly employee that works here around noon - lose the attitude. It makes the experience even worse than it is. It is not mine, or anyone else's fault that you look like you do, and the universe has set your employment at a Subway in the heart of ASU. Its not our fault that your days are spent serving some of the hottest girls on the planet while they ignore your questions and continue to text on their iphones. They are busy, planning their photo shoots for Playboy and their weekends in Vegas.

Unfortunately this is where you are at this point in your life, so get over it. Serve the incredibly hot Delta Gamma's and chubby Delta Theta's. Don't put so much mayo on my 6" roast beef and move on. We can make this whole experience so much better without the attitude.

fucking delta thetas