EUROVISION 2012

Also the botox has worn off and he doesn't look like embalmed like he does in the video.

This is probably the best of the ballads, tbh.

There are a lot of ballads this year, hopefully Eng's performance has shown people 'how it's done', so to speak, and we'll get some votes out of it.

liking hungary a lot more this go-round - getting kind of a nu-george michael vibe (enough with the wobble bass already tho)

Hungary: much effort into what sounds like a bare skeleton of approximately nothing

HORSEMEN LAND

The person doing the subtitles tonight is a faster typist than whoever was doing it during the semis.

TAILPIPE MAN LAND

xxp

HORSEMEN LAND

That long plait of hair going across her chest looks like a turd.

markedly less terrible than the semifinal at least

Albania is like alien music on Star Trek...not a gd look.

emil.y does a mean goth retaliation, it must be said -- this is wtf in all the most fabulous ways

CITY OF DRIVE

It'd be funny if everyone left the building before he took off the blindfold.

Hahahaha!

The 'rrrruuuhhhh' bits make him sound like the singer from Bros.

would have been better if he'd done those acrobatics with the fold on

*does somersault and nuts self unconcious on the floor*

The Boz/Herz entry is like a subdued Celine Dion B-side. Really forgettable.

For a second I thought 'what are those huge lumps on the Russian grannies' faces?', but then I realised that they were microphones.

UDMURT

I have a feeling they'll be advertising car insurance for whoever Russia's equivelent of Shelia's Wheels is.

Just turned on and those grannies are bluddy awful.

Iceland = time for a piss break

Umpty-tum nonsense. But would have been top 3 10 years ago.

OOH KEY CHANGE

if you liked that key change, you're gonna love moldova

I wait with bated breath.

This Cyprus thing sounds like a David Guetta b-side.

I must disagree with Aldo. Rabid grannies for the win!

But info quite like Cyprus ( actually I seriously do warn Enge to win, I just don't think it will happen)

France = shit.

It's a bit 'mid 90's French Eurovision entry'. They've never really moved beyond that.

Oh I dunno. It's OK. I'm quite perversely thinking of It Bites.

it's kinda like the climax of a jodorowsky film

France = ok indeed.

xp lol It Bites!

LAND OF CARPETS

Italian woman has annoyed me enormously in the build up, but the song has a chance.

Cut price Winelodge.

"you're an independant Roman after all"

Yeah, I think your right
Xpost

"Come on audience, sing along to these lyrics that are very likely to be in a language that you don't speak!"

"I bought a gunshot"?

Barry Manilow!

He needs some headphones to hold to his ears as he emotes.

Norway - if Skrillex was Turkish

PUSH ME
AND THEN JUST TOUCH ME
TILL I GET MY
SATISFACTION

"my heart beats faster as I'm scanning the crowd" > sniper?

"My meat is all peaking when I can tell you're around"

"skinning the crowd" > serial killer taxidermist

"I don't know what I'm doing tonight but this birdshit is making me stronger"