Seinfeld: Classic or Dud

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George orders a BLT, but realizes that he hates the texture of tomato, and the lettuce doesn’t add anything at all. He starts eating “BBBs” for lunch instead.

frogbs, Thursday, 10 May 2012 14:07 (2 years ago) Permalink

there's some duds, but mostly bizarre lols

andrew m., Thursday, 10 May 2012 14:09 (2 years ago) Permalink

okay these are getting weird

George practices handling food as minimally as possible in order to avoid having to wash his hands as often. Jerry is unnerved when his new girlfriend confesses she’s been to every one of his shows since 1992. Elaine dates a man who enjoys having cigarettes put out on his skin, and finds herself increasingly turned on by secondhand smoke. When the others finally learn Kramer’s first name — Cosmo — he pulls open his face and blasts them all into oblivion with the tiny star contained inside his skull.

frogbs, Thursday, 10 May 2012 14:10 (2 years ago) Permalink

Elaine wears “low heel shoes” with the toe elevated higher than the heel.

andrew m., Thursday, 10 May 2012 14:11 (2 years ago) Permalink

some of these are close enough to the real thing

The Penguin

When Elaine’s coworker starts taking two-hour-long lunches, she tries to do the same, only to later learn that the woman only takes so long because she has to be fed through a special tube. Kramer starts writing down detailed predictions about trivial events on long scrolls, which he stores in Jerry’s freezer. After a teen on the street refers to an umbrella-wielding George as ‘The Penguin’, he starts to find other commonalities with the character. Jerry receives a request to perform at a fan’s funeral.

andrew m., Thursday, 10 May 2012 14:14 (2 years ago) Permalink

i love it how some of them are basically take offs on existing Seinfeld plots, then some are like this

George takes up painting to relieve stress, but finds that he can only paint grotesque images of massive tragedies. Elaine rubs against rough surfaces in Jerry’s apartment in order to shed her skin, which Newman later discovers by accident, and eats after overcoming his initial terror. Kramer’s new shampoo turns his hair bright purple. Jerry vomits a living fetus.

it's as if a computer is writing these

frogbs, Thursday, 10 May 2012 14:17 (2 years ago) Permalink

When Jerry confesses to Elaine that he’s still a virgin and has faked every sexual encounter using misdirection and sleight-of-hand, she gives him such a forceful “Get Out” push that he quantum tunnels through his apartment wall and falls to the sidewalk outside. Newman loses a bet with Kramer and has to carry him around on his shoulders for a week. George wakes up to discover psychedelic mushrooms growing between his toes.

frogbs, Thursday, 10 May 2012 14:19 (2 years ago) Permalink

"George is bitten by a radioactive pedophile and dreads the potential consequences."

nickn, Thursday, 10 May 2012 16:43 (2 years ago) Permalink

I would love to see some of these actually performed, but I'll probably have to settle for my imagination.

Spectrum, Thursday, 10 May 2012 20:41 (2 years ago) Permalink

yeah I've been imagining a 10th season with some of these, some of the bits about Jerry bombing or Bania trying to find "the best" bathroom in NYC are funny as hell

frogbs, Thursday, 10 May 2012 20:45 (2 years ago) Permalink

These are really good, especially the quotes in character:

George finds a hair in his soup and insists that it “tasted pubic”.

Kramer thinks “horse-faced” should be considered a compliment. “Horses are noble creatures, Jerry. Kings and knights had them.”

Elaine tries to woo the man who moves into the victim’s apartment, saying he’s “way more handsome than the dead guy.”

Jerry is offended when a piece of fan mail is signed, “Regards.” “Regards? Regarding what? You’re just acknowledging my existence?” He nasally whines. “I don’t even get a ‘Best?’ At least with ‘Best,’ you’re getting something good. You don’t know what, but you know it’s good. It’s the best!”

misty sensorium (Plasmon), Friday, 11 May 2012 08:50 (2 years ago) Permalink

These seem entirely authentic IE entirely unfunny.

Andrew Farrell, Friday, 11 May 2012 10:07 (2 years ago) Permalink

2 months pass...

Anyone else watching this?

http://www.comediansincarsgettingcoffee.com

Jerry Seinfeld's web series. Unscripted, off the cuff, two comedians hanging out, with the added bit of Seinfeld's ridiculous rich guy car collection.

I don't enjoy it. Feels like a vanity project. It's kind of stiff and unfunny. The Gervais episode was a hard to watch. I think i'll keep watching it though.

America's Mobile, Friday, 10 August 2012 18:15 (2 years ago) Permalink

Is there any evidence of Seinfeld being funny after Seinfeld? I mean it's clear that Larry David still has it, and even though those last two seasons without him were actually pretty good, Seinfeld's post-Seinfeld life is littered with terrible commercials, The Marriage Ref, and awful twitter account, and now this

frogbs, Friday, 10 August 2012 18:18 (2 years ago) Permalink

the larry david one is great because it has larry david being larry david

40oz of tears (Jordan), Friday, 10 August 2012 18:31 (2 years ago) Permalink

because it has larry david being larry david

not a positive imo

johnny crunch, Friday, 10 August 2012 18:34 (2 years ago) Permalink

Seinfeld is just Larry DAvid's dickpuppet

Sweet Yin Yang ☯ (Latham Green), Friday, 10 August 2012 18:43 (2 years ago) Permalink

not a positive imo

f u imo :)

40oz of tears (Jordan), Friday, 10 August 2012 19:01 (2 years ago) Permalink

The Larry David one might've been OK because he and Jerry have a great rapport, which definitely couldn't be said about him and Gervais. The Brian Regan one wasn't so bad. But this series seems to be just Jerry on autopilot. It would be interesting if he were trying a little harder. It really just seems unprepared, totally winging it.

America's Mobile, Friday, 10 August 2012 20:08 (2 years ago) Permalink

The Larry David one might've been OK because he and Jerry have a great rapport, which definitely couldn't be said about him and Gervais. The Brian Regan one wasn't so bad. But this series seems to be just Jerry on autopilot. It would be interesting if he were trying a little harder. It really just seems unprepared, totally winging it.

America's Mobile, Friday, 10 August 2012 20:11 (2 years ago) Permalink

gervais woul dbe better served with a Mitchell or Webb

Sweet Yin Yang ☯ (Latham Green), Friday, 10 August 2012 20:14 (2 years ago) Permalink

3 weeks pass...

We did the usual thing today where each of my students introduced his or her seatmate, and it turns out one my girls says she wants to be an architect. Naturally thrilled. If she suddenly decides she wants to be a city planner instead, I won't be happy.

clemenza, Wednesday, 5 September 2012 03:31 (2 years ago) Permalink

What if she wants to be a marine biologist?

nickn, Saturday, 8 September 2012 03:11 (2 years ago) Permalink

We were joking about that! (A Seinfeld fan I work with.) The thing is, she's a nice girl and a good student--apparently she really does want to be an architect. It defeats the whole purpose if she's not a complete phony like George.

clemenza, Saturday, 8 September 2012 03:15 (2 years ago) Permalink

1 month passes...

Everybody's talkin at me
I can't hear a word they're sayin
Just drivin round in Jon Voight's car

Emperor Cos Dashit (Adam Bruneau), Wednesday, 10 October 2012 20:38 (1 year ago) Permalink

Any hot chicks out there want to get bisy just let me know. I got it all . They call me "the Mutt" and with all that implies. And that ain't dirt in my eye.

Larry

― Larry Mutt, Wednesday, August 15, 2001 8:00 PM (11 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

HAHAHH what???

Emperor Cos Dashit (Adam Bruneau), Wednesday, 10 October 2012 21:20 (1 year ago) Permalink

valuable old posters

some dude, Wednesday, 10 October 2012 21:22 (1 year ago) Permalink

rip larry mutt

turds (Hungry4Ass), Wednesday, 10 October 2012 21:24 (1 year ago) Permalink

"i don't think i could do it. they say you always remember your first time. i don't want to be remembered, i want to be forgotten."

(The Other) J.D. (J.D.), Wednesday, 10 October 2012 21:26 (1 year ago) Permalink

5 months pass...

I just saw the episode with the other Frank Costanza (the handicapped parking/Drake episode). Very disorienting, having seen the reshot episode many times. MIA: the way Jerry Stiller says "de-li-ver" when he instructs George to pick up the wheelchair.

clemenza, Wednesday, 13 March 2013 20:04 (1 year ago) Permalink

"The Switch" was on the other day. I think it might be the greatest episode of any sitcom ever.

frogbs, Wednesday, 13 March 2013 20:05 (1 year ago) Permalink

2 months pass...

Yeah, they've been killing it all month.

Plasmon, Monday, 20 May 2013 03:48 (1 year ago) Permalink

I like these but one of them is a direct lift from a Star Trek: deep space nine episode I'm sure of it.

Philip Nunez, Monday, 20 May 2013 04:52 (1 year ago) Permalink

the jerry arc there is from a krzhizhonovsky story

the white queen and her caustic judgments (difficult listening hour), Monday, 20 May 2013 04:56 (1 year ago) Permalink

I am familiar with the works of Sigizmund Krzhizhanovsky.

Plasmon, Monday, 20 May 2013 08:02 (1 year ago) Permalink

reminded me of "House of Leaves"

Number None, Monday, 20 May 2013 14:21 (1 year ago) Permalink

George stares into the abyss, but the abyss shows no interest back.

frogbs, Monday, 20 May 2013 15:09 (1 year ago) Permalink

that's from nietzsche

the white queen and her caustic judgments (difficult listening hour), Monday, 20 May 2013 16:03 (1 year ago) Permalink

ugh this is even cornier than 'future seinfeld,' what is the compulsion to use an actual comedy classic as fodder for chin-scratching internet humor

yeeznuts (some dude), Monday, 20 May 2013 16:16 (1 year ago) Permalink

this here is one of my favourite piece of 'internet humour':

Seinfeld Current Day ‏@Seinfeld2000
Newmen comit suicide

NI, Monday, 20 May 2013 16:40 (1 year ago) Permalink

lol

Le Bateau Ivre, Monday, 20 May 2013 16:41 (1 year ago) Permalink

wait what's chin scratching about it -- it's pretty faithful to the Seinfeld template and free of deliberate misspellings.

Philip Nunez, Monday, 20 May 2013 16:45 (1 year ago) Permalink

7 months pass...

, Friday, 10 January 2014 18:35 (8 months ago) Permalink

3 weeks pass...

George and Jerry's 'Comedians In Cars' reunion special http://comediansincarsgettingcoffee.com/george-costanza-the-over-cheer

piscesx, Monday, 3 February 2014 03:34 (7 months ago) Permalink

This was not funny at all.

Burt Stuntin (Hurting 2), Monday, 3 February 2014 04:03 (7 months ago) Permalink

I've been enjoying Comedians in Cars, though. Not the Tina Fey one as much as the others, but I'm a regular viewer. And i was ina Starbucks next to a guy watching it on his laptop, which makes me think it's taking off.

tbd (Eazy), Monday, 3 February 2014 04:08 (7 months ago) Permalink

so wait is 'Goerge Costanza' in character in this episode of Comedians in Cars?

scott c-word (some dude), Monday, 3 February 2014 04:22 (7 months ago) Permalink

i'll never know!

balls, Monday, 3 February 2014 04:36 (7 months ago) Permalink

xp I think the concept is that it starts out as the actors but kind of time-warps into the characters when they enter the restaurant. Man I fucking hate Jerry Seinfeld.

Burt Stuntin (Hurting 2), Monday, 3 February 2014 04:41 (7 months ago) Permalink


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