'John Carter,' aka the Edgar Rice Burroughs 'A Princess of Mars' adaptation

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no, no, it's good. denby's sole purpose at the new yorker afaict is to make all the other writers look good by comparison. he's like the dero of movie writers.

all yoga attacks are fire based (rogermexico.), Tuesday, 20 March 2012 22:51 (2 years ago) Permalink

I would fight denby tbh

all yoga attacks are fire based (rogermexico.), Tuesday, 20 March 2012 22:54 (2 years ago) Permalink

he's like the derpy of movie writers

Fozzy Osbourne (contenderizer), Tuesday, 20 March 2012 23:05 (2 years ago) Permalink

this movie was very easy to understand, btw

Fozzy Osbourne (contenderizer), Tuesday, 20 March 2012 23:06 (2 years ago) Permalink

There's CGI in Zodiac? Must watch it again.

Sick Mouthy (Scik Mouthy), Tuesday, 20 March 2012 23:42 (2 years ago) Permalink

Once again, tried to see John Carter tonight, and the showtimes were totally inhospitable. Like, 6:20 or 9:40. Fuck that noise. It's almost like they're trying to bury this cat turd. Oh well. Saw "21 Jump Street" instead. Was funny.

Josh in Chicago, Wednesday, 21 March 2012 02:45 (2 years ago) Permalink

There's CGI in Zodiac? Must watch it again.

― Sick Mouthy (Scik Mouthy), Tuesday, March 20, 2012 6:42 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

every shot in fincher's recent movies is like a composite of several takes, using CGI. it's insane.

flesh, the devil, and a wolf (wolf) (amateurist), Wednesday, 21 March 2012 09:59 (2 years ago) Permalink

AV Club loved it, though they point out that a fully faithful version would have to be made by Paul Verhoeven and unreleasable in the US.

Vulture has an interesting story about how it was massively mishandled partly because the director made Finding Nemo and Wall-E and was basically made of gold to Disney.

Also read somewhere that Disney's films department is now making a loss for the fourth year in a row after betting bad on Mars Needs Moms, The Sorceror's Apprentice, and Prince of Persia.

Andrew Farrell, Wednesday, 21 March 2012 11:06 (2 years ago) Permalink

Also what's really really weird is that the 'logo' for the film has a very visible J C and M - it looks like they took 'of Mars' recently - except that it's been called John Carter for as long as I've been aware of it.

Andrew Farrell, Wednesday, 21 March 2012 11:08 (2 years ago) Permalink

A lot riding on The Avengers then

Number None, Wednesday, 21 March 2012 11:15 (2 years ago) Permalink

I'm finally seeing this today! 11am, y'all! Set expectations on ... low.

Josh in Chicago, Wednesday, 21 March 2012 12:59 (2 years ago) Permalink

he's like the derpy of movie writers

How dare you insult derpy like that, at least she is funny and cute.

Respectfully, Tyrese Gibson (Nicole), Wednesday, 21 March 2012 14:14 (2 years ago) Permalink

In comparison to denby, anyway.

Respectfully, Tyrese Gibson (Nicole), Wednesday, 21 March 2012 14:15 (2 years ago) Permalink

Mars Needs Moms, The Sorceror's Apprentice, and Prince of Persia
man I can't believe they lost money on these.
National Treasure 3, The Search For Revenue set for release Summer 2013.

WARS OF ARMAGEDDON (Karaoke Version) (Sparkle Motion), Wednesday, 21 March 2012 17:08 (2 years ago) Permalink

I tried to watch Sorceror's. First 15 minutes were too painful to bear. Seemed like some committee's idea of what kids want to watch.

Axolotl with an Atlatl (Jon Lewis), Wednesday, 21 March 2012 17:12 (2 years ago) Permalink

Maybe it was just the version I saw but the very end had JOHN CARTER OF MARS before the credits. (Just 'JOHN CARTER' at the start)

kinder, Wednesday, 21 March 2012 17:31 (2 years ago) Permalink

"wait a minute, that was all taking place on Mars?"

Number None, Wednesday, 21 March 2012 17:39 (2 years ago) Permalink

haha

kinder, Wednesday, 21 March 2012 17:40 (2 years ago) Permalink

Put that at the end of Jerry Maguire and see how it plays...

Axolotl with an Atlatl (Jon Lewis), Wednesday, 21 March 2012 17:43 (2 years ago) Permalink

Mildred Pierce OF MARS

Axolotl with an Atlatl (Jon Lewis), Wednesday, 21 March 2012 17:43 (2 years ago) Permalink

Michael Clayton OF MARS

bring back the dream of buzz bin (Phil D.), Wednesday, 21 March 2012 17:44 (2 years ago) Permalink

Nixon OF MARS

wait that might make more sense

Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 21 March 2012 17:58 (2 years ago) Permalink

Carter's of mars, Nixon's of Venus

Axolotl with an Atlatl (Jon Lewis), Wednesday, 21 March 2012 18:03 (2 years ago) Permalink

John, Carter of Mars

the sir edmund hillary of sitting through pauly shore films (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, 21 March 2012 18:07 (2 years ago) Permalink

Of Mice and Men of Mars

Fozzy Osbourne (contenderizer), Wednesday, 21 March 2012 18:08 (2 years ago) Permalink

Anne of Green Gables of Mars

Fozzy Osbourne (contenderizer), Wednesday, 21 March 2012 18:09 (2 years ago) Permalink

Mars Needs Moms of Mars

Number None, Wednesday, 21 March 2012 18:13 (2 years ago) Permalink

The Rise of the Planet (Mars) of the Apes

Axolotl with an Atlatl (Jon Lewis), Wednesday, 21 March 2012 18:14 (2 years ago) Permalink

Disney Needs Money of Mars

the sir edmund hillary of sitting through pauly shore films (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, 21 March 2012 18:16 (2 years ago) Permalink

I Don't Know How She Does It On Mars

Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 21 March 2012 18:18 (2 years ago) Permalink

Sex and The City On Mars

Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 21 March 2012 18:18 (2 years ago) Permalink

Mars Attacks On Mars

kinder, Wednesday, 21 March 2012 18:39 (2 years ago) Permalink

John Carpenter's Ghosts Of Mars On Mars

Aunt Acid and the Gaviscons (aldo), Wednesday, 21 March 2012 18:40 (2 years ago) Permalink

Mask of Mars

goole, Wednesday, 21 March 2012 18:41 (2 years ago) Permalink

Star Wars Of Mars

Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 21 March 2012 18:44 (2 years ago) Permalink

Delta of Venus of Mars

bring back the dream of buzz bin (Phil D.), Wednesday, 21 March 2012 18:45 (2 years ago) Permalink

To Live and Die in L.A. of Mars

Fozzy Osbourne (contenderizer), Wednesday, 21 March 2012 18:49 (2 years ago) Permalink

Freddy vs. Jason of Mars

Fozzy Osbourne (contenderizer), Wednesday, 21 March 2012 18:50 (2 years ago) Permalink

The Passion of the Christ of Mars

Fozzy Osbourne (contenderizer), Wednesday, 21 March 2012 18:51 (2 years ago) Permalink

Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil of Mars

BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Wednesday, 21 March 2012 18:58 (2 years ago) Permalink

Holes of Mars

goole, Wednesday, 21 March 2012 19:03 (2 years ago) Permalink

A Trip to the Moon of Mars

bring back the dream of buzz bin (Phil D.), Wednesday, 21 March 2012 19:04 (2 years ago) Permalink

Schindler's List of Mars

scott seward, Wednesday, 21 March 2012 19:05 (2 years ago) Permalink

Just got back. This movie was perfectly fine! I will say, however, that the stuff that doesn't work about it largely falls at Stanton's feet: his misbegotten promotion ideas, his inability to find a rhythm (talk talk talk ACTION talk talk ACTION talk), his lack of experience dealing with in-the-flesh actors and occasional tough time simply putting a movie of this scope together (weird framing and mismatched scenes abounded). Bummer we won't get a sequel, because obviously the foundation is there. How did fucking Clash of the Titans get a sequel? Was that a blockbuster? How did Battleship get made at all?

This movie did leave me wanting a six-legged butt-dog of my own, though. And a Lynn Collins.

Josh in Chicago, Wednesday, 21 March 2012 19:07 (2 years ago) Permalink

I have a butt-dog but alas, she only got 4 legs.

Axolotl with an Atlatl (Jon Lewis), Wednesday, 21 March 2012 19:36 (2 years ago) Permalink

his inability to find a rhythm (talk talk talk ACTION talk talk ACTION talk),

i think this is a big problem yeah. i still think any scene where characters are gravely spewing 30 different goofy alien names at you is just dead-on-arrival. i also didnt care for how JC felt like a cardboard Reluctant Modern Movie Hero - right down to the phoned-in hero refusing the call moments. most of the stuff about his backstory was unnecessary, especially all the stuff where he keeps telling people he's done with fighting other peoples wars or whatever - it doesnt resonate, and it drags the movie down. you never believe him as a southern gentleman from virginia either

How did fucking Clash of the Titans get a sequel? Was that a blockbuster?

a big one!

How did Battleship get made at all?

thats kind of a funny story actually. universal was desperate for franchises a few years ago and hasbro had just switched to an aggressive firm looking to make some deals, so universal bought the rights to a bunch of hasbro properties, with penalty clauses if they didnt get projects off the ground within a certain amount of time. so to avoid a 7 figure penalty, they commit to a $200 million Battleship picture because it was the best choice out of a bad lot. i think their deal recently went in the toilet so there probably won't be any more boardgame movies in the near future.

these pretzels are makeing me horney (Hungry4Ass), Wednesday, 21 March 2012 20:56 (2 years ago) Permalink

you mean we're not going to get Ridley Scott's Monopoly?

Number None, Wednesday, 21 March 2012 20:57 (2 years ago) Permalink

I want to see that list

(he did what!) (Austerity Ponies), Wednesday, 21 March 2012 20:59 (2 years ago) Permalink

The Cluening

the sir edmund hillary of sitting through pauly shore films (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, 21 March 2012 20:59 (2 years ago) Permalink


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