Lindsay Lohan: "Hot, Ready, and Legal!"

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"Lindsay Lohan has been eighteen for just under a week when she tells me her breasts are real. I did not ask (gentlemen never do), though my reporting (discreet visual fact-checking, a goodbye hug) seems to confirm her statement."

jaymc (jaymc), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 18:54 (10 years ago) Permalink

does lindsay work for www.teenstogetbrokeninto.com or something?

i have no idea who she is.

thesplooge (thesplooge), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 18:55 (10 years ago) Permalink

That "reporting" comment is too fucking coy for words.

David R. (popshots75`), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 18:55 (10 years ago) Permalink

Who wrote the story, and can we abuse them?

Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 18:58 (10 years ago) Permalink

click on the link.

hstencil (hstencil), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 18:59 (10 years ago) Permalink

"wrote"

Gear! (Gear!), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 18:59 (10 years ago) Permalink

click on the link

Frightening thought.

Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 18:59 (10 years ago) Permalink

Rosemary I've got lots of Nyquil! I'll ship it overnight.

Gear! (Gear!), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 18:59 (10 years ago) Permalink

don't blame me, Ned.

hstencil (hstencil), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:00 (10 years ago) Permalink

Oh, so YOU wrote it!

Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:00 (10 years ago) Permalink

hstencil (hstencil), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:01 (10 years ago) Permalink

I could think of a better pseudonym than MARK BINELLI.

hstencil (hstencil), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:01 (10 years ago) Permalink

haha, i thought the quote from the intro in this thread was a piss-take.

thesplooge (thesplooge), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:05 (10 years ago) Permalink

It sounds like Ms. Lohan has a wonderful homelife!

Ian c=====8 (orion), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:09 (10 years ago) Permalink

Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen
Forget those rumors about her breasts. Lindsay Lohan has risen to the top of the teen-star crop by keeping it real

Kingfish von Bandersnatch (Kingfish), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:26 (10 years ago) Permalink

Does that mean she only has one breast, but it's real?

Huck, Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:28 (10 years ago) Permalink

I wish Lindsay would quit it with the spray tan.

Homosexual II (Homosexual II), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:37 (10 years ago) Permalink

What exactly is she known for in the first place?

Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:37 (10 years ago) Permalink

She'd be such a moon goddess if she were pale and freckly instead of orange and freckly. Oh and the frosty pink lips gotta go, too. And the eyeliner.

Homosexual II (Homosexual II), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:38 (10 years ago) Permalink

Ned: title of the thread, minus "legal."

hstencil (hstencil), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:38 (10 years ago) Permalink

How quaint.

Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:39 (10 years ago) Permalink

She looks like a cat that's just sat on a buttplug. Doesn't do anything for me.

AdamL :') (nordicskilla), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:39 (10 years ago) Permalink

Ned how old do you sound with these comments? (Alternate: Ned how long were you in Venezuela?)

Begs2Differ (Begs2Differ), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:39 (10 years ago) Permalink

It does something for the cat, Adam.

Ned how old do you sound with these comments?

I always talk like this! The only think I know about Ms. Lohan was some poster for a movie earlier this year, which failed to convince me as to why she was already known.

I was there for a week and a half.

Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:40 (10 years ago) Permalink

She looks like the photographer has just said to her, in an Austin Powers voice, "oooooh Lindsay, you're ever so NAUGHTY!".

AdamL :') (nordicskilla), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:41 (10 years ago) Permalink

think = thing, etc.

Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:41 (10 years ago) Permalink

Mandee OTM about the pale-&-freckly. For sure.

jaymc (jaymc), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:42 (10 years ago) Permalink

MEN CAN'T SEE MAKEUP.

AdamL :') (nordicskilla), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:42 (10 years ago) Permalink

She was very funny in Freaky Friday and Mean Girls, FWIW.

nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:43 (10 years ago) Permalink

They just think that all women's lips are like that.

AdamL :') (nordicskilla), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:43 (10 years ago) Permalink

I must admit, I thought she was a cute kid when I caught The Parent Trap on the ABC/Disney Family Movie or whatever a few years ago. But she was 12 then.

jaymc (jaymc), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:44 (10 years ago) Permalink

So she's some sort of Disney-clone-farm troll, I assume.

Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:45 (10 years ago) Permalink

too old now? xp

Gear! (Gear!), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:45 (10 years ago) Permalink

Kirsetn Dunst in Interview With The Vampire to thread.

AdamL :') (nordicskilla), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:46 (10 years ago) Permalink

the tan, the makeup, the clothes - no, no, no. it makes me want to kill myself! do you know what i could do if i had that kind of $ at my disposal? i'd be unstoppable! and i'd know enough to pay for a decent plastic surgeon! jesus wept!

lauren (laurenp), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:46 (10 years ago) Permalink

I wish they'd cut the double entendres and enuendo and just make the headline "HEY SICK OLD MAN, YOU WANT TO FUCK HER DON'T? DONT YOU?"

David Allen (David Allen), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:47 (10 years ago) Permalink

I was a child actor, and nobody celebrated my own passing over the jailbait threshold. What gives?

AdamL :') (nordicskilla), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:47 (10 years ago) Permalink

Well, i was the innkeeper in a nativity play.

AdamL :') (nordicskilla), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:47 (10 years ago) Permalink

Did you wear a blanket around your head like Linus?

Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:48 (10 years ago) Permalink

I like how Rolling Stone now has covers that Maxim and FHM would deem too obvious.

Gear! (Gear!), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:48 (10 years ago) Permalink

"Sorry. no room, Mary and joseph"

Cue rapturous applause.

AdamL :') (nordicskilla), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:48 (10 years ago) Permalink

Does this lust for untouchable teenage Hollywood jailbait - the kind that causes me to claw at my eyes during sleep, write "creative" letters to the police and local newspapers, use Photoshop for purposes surely at odds with those for which it was conceived, and spend hours in front of the mirror repeating various mantras to myself - dissipate with age, I wonder? Or are we subject to a lifetime of this torture?

AdamL :') (nordicskilla), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:54 (10 years ago) Permalink

ILE rips on celebrities too much. This is my counterpost. I like Lohan quite a bit. She's decent on the acting front, can be awfully funny, and just generally has a likeability that a lot of competing teen-girl-stars don't, quite so much. She's got a style that's generally hers, or anyway doesn't seem all styled-and-crafted to blankness. Plus she's awfully cute, in a laid-back and smart-seeming kind of way. She's now surprisingly curvy, and not just in a breasty way, which is possibly somehow refreshing for a teen-girl-star. Equally refreshing is that she's not incredibly chipper and eager-to-please like most people in her position wind up being. You start imagining that if you spent time with her she'd pick on you and make lots of sly dirty jokes, as opposed to like Hilary Duff, who would be all chipper and talky and energetic. You can imagine Lohan hanging out and getting stoned and eating cookies, in a fun, healthy way, which is hard to imagine with say Duff, and hard to imagine with say the Olsen Twins except as some sort of sordid spiraling-away "It's Drugs!" thing. Plus I will totally admit it: in Mean Girls, during the Christmas dance bit, Lohan and her large thighs look super-nice. I don't mean that in a dirty or obsessed way, just that she looked nice and I was happy for her.

So there.

nabisco (nabisco), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:55 (10 years ago) Permalink

Also it's important to note that I like her hair and her freckles, which I agree should not always be oranged-out.

nabisco (nabisco), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:57 (10 years ago) Permalink

I'm not dissing her, Nabisco! I do really, really hate the spray tan, though.

jaymc (jaymc), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:58 (10 years ago) Permalink

yay nabisco!

she is like a safe Carmen Electra. Now I realize that making Carmen Electra safe takes away most of the fun, but, you know. I'm not complaining.

kyle (akmonday), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:59 (10 years ago) Permalink

i think hillary duff is brilliant. still haven't seen mean girls, so i'll withhold my opinion on which of them should have 'won' (there was/is beef btw HD & LL, right?) my point was, RS LIES.

g--ff (gcannon), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 19:59 (10 years ago) Permalink

I think this isn't so much anti-Lindsay as it is anti-"Rolling Stone again summing up a young female celeb by the fact that they can now be legally fucked"

Gear! (Gear!), Wednesday, 28 July 2004 20:00 (10 years ago) Permalink

hot, ready and legal for 10 years.

how's life, Tuesday, 21 October 2014 08:36 (1 month ago) Permalink

The audience at Speed-the-Plow didn’t form the usual theatregoing suspects. A third were sexy twentysomethings

were they now?

Mark G, Tuesday, 21 October 2014 10:01 (1 month ago) Permalink

yes they were - one third

conrad, Tuesday, 21 October 2014 14:30 (1 month ago) Permalink

Nigel Lindsay, the fine comic British actor, made a decent American fist of his co-producer,

this sounds difficult

Οὖτις, Tuesday, 21 October 2014 17:21 (1 month ago) Permalink

Theater is a great move in reputation restoration. I hope she can stay steady.

smoochy-woochy touchy-wouchy, (sunny successor), Tuesday, 21 October 2014 17:22 (1 month ago) Permalink

Lindsay Lohan: "Hot, Ready, Legal and Increasingly Irrelevant!"

Aimless, Tuesday, 21 October 2014 17:28 (1 month ago) Permalink

"Hot, Ready, and Off-Book!"

the man with the black wigs (Eazy), Tuesday, 21 October 2014 17:39 (1 month ago) Permalink

1 month passes...

bleb
fram
spep
FORNARINA

fgti jaq, it's chinavision! (Stevie D(eux)), Sunday, 30 November 2014 18:51 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

smack?

StanM, Sunday, 30 November 2014 19:59 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

blap
cram
toot

difficult-difficult lemon-difficult (VegemiteGrrl), Sunday, 30 November 2014 20:33 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

(HQ)

the late great, Sunday, 30 November 2014 20:47 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

i was hoping it was some kind of lilo candy crush game

difficult-difficult lemon-difficult (VegemiteGrrl), Sunday, 30 November 2014 20:49 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

Following in Madonna's footsteps. Would have liked to see the play, despite some distaste for Mamet.

Banned on the Run (benbbag), Monday, 1 December 2014 00:12 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

bleb
fram
spep
FORNARINA

otm

the incredible string gland (sic), Monday, 1 December 2014 04:46 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

murch
splet
burtt
thom
fornarina

I dunno. (amateurist), Monday, 1 December 2014 07:19 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

Precision.
Timelessness.
Grandiose.
Impeccable.
The gorgeousest. Fornarina clothes.
All the cosmopolitans of a Cosmo time piece.
You'll be the one watching your dreams come true.
With Fornarina.

nickn, Monday, 1 December 2014 18:06 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

F, O, R, N, A, R, I, N, A.
FORNARINA

YOU OWN EVERYTHING

EVERYTHING IS YOURS.

fgti jaq, it's chinavision! (Stevie D(eux)), Monday, 1 December 2014 19:25 (2 weeks ago) Permalink


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