Bruno Mars/Smeezingtons singles poll

And then she could do "Right Round."

you spin me right round baby right round
like a record baby
a 45
on my sassy mama's victrola
black and white movies
stickball gaaaames

the worst of these are seriously some of the most atrocious songs of my lifetime

― illuminati girl (J0rdan S.), Thursday, February 16, 2012 10:04 AM (4 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

otm

Why is this a poll? This is like asking "which pile of vomit is least fermented."

tbf hipsters would be all over "The Lazy Song" and "Bow Chicka Wow Wow" if they were sung by Gnarls Barkley
― CANDY aka JUNK (some dude), Thursday, February 16, 2012 1:23 PM (3 hours ago) Bookmark

Are you sure hipsters are really that stupid?

the ones that went nuts for "Fuck You" are, yes

its equally obvious that "fuck you" would not have been a hit among hipsters if bruno mars had sung it but i dont think it works the other way, esp for "the lazy song"

well yeah i'm trolling mostly but i still feel like those songs are all pretty interchangeable in terms of their musical merit or senses of humor

about a month ago i finally found myself having to give in and accept that i actually love a bruno mars song ("it will rain")

also like or tolerate:

right round
nothin' on you
fuck you
grenade

Billionaire probably annoys me more than any other song in recent memory, particularly for being so historically/politically tone deaf

Nothing is interchangeable with "The Lazy Song". Nothing.

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

My mom was arguing with me about how it is impossible to dislike "The Lazy Song", and it was in fact the greatest song of the past year. This disturbed me a great deal.

It upsets me to ponder even for a moment the worldview vantage point from which "The Lazy Song" is a great song.

Like think about how sad (emotionally) you must be to hear this song and really vibe with it.

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

fuck all five of you

shoulda been six coz I forgot to vote #takethat

Wait Bruno Mars wrote 'fuck you'? I would've voted for that and yeah whoever said that a hipster like myself would love Lazy Song if it was sung by Cee-lo is otm. Why is there anything wrong with that idk.

cuz it's a dogshit song that's completely reprehensible on many, many grounds that transcend who happens to be singing the song

Oh I know the song is dogshit. I was just saying I'd prefer any Bruno Mars song with Cee-loo singing it instead of him. I guess the polemic was that someone upthread was debating that we should prefer the real Bruno Mars' version just because he is the composer but that is utter bollocks. Lazy Song by Bruno Mars is offensive as performance and composition and with Cee-lo it would only be offensive as composition.

"i prefer my shit painted with gold"

cuz it's a dogshit song that's completely reprehensible on many, many grounds that transcend who happens to be singing the song

― J0rdan S., Thursday, February 23, 2012 1:23 AM (7 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

so is "Fuck You"

Doesn't matter how many times you say it, some dude, you're on the wrong side of the "Fuck You" issue. I loved it the first time I heard it, and so did America. I'll agree about "Lazy Song," though the vehemence of the protests here doth seems too much.

Based purely on my observations, seems like women like Bruno Mars a lot more than men do. I have some ideas about what that means, but I don't know if any of them are especially relevant or true.

some dude: wrong on chintzy fauxtown novelty songs, wrong for america

i think your observation is that bruno mars is a pretty boy pop star who occupies the same cultural space as nearly every other pretty boy pop star in history

Anybody know about that Sesame Street jam upthread? Thanks.

I do not think that that is my observation, but thanks as always for the condescension!

just saying, "women like [male pop singer] a lot more than men do" is not a truth bomb in and of itself, especially if you're not actually going to share your promised ideas about it.

In an unstable world some dude's enduring hatred of Fuck You is something I can rely on.

i'm kind of indifferent to it, really, i just think it's hilarious that it's such an acclaimed song and love to troll people about it

lots of ilx posters basically dislike it, i think

also, america (and britain) love a lot of shitty songs

5.87: Rate Cee-Lo's "F**k You" out of ten

I loved it the first time I heard it, and so did America.
I loved it the first time I heard it, and so did America.
I loved it the first time I heard it, and so did America.
I loved it the first time I heard it, and so did America.
I loved it the first time I heard it, and so did America.
I loved it the first time I heard it, and so did America.
I loved it the first time I heard it, and so did America.
I loved it the first time I heard it, and so did America.
I loved it the first time I heard it, and so did America.
I loved it the first time I heard it, and so did America.

Why do you hate America, some dude?

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-g-HfIkCzJ7c/TeOQ_z-s0eI/AAAAAAAAFfc/_wJzb8DS-zo/s1600/statue-of-liberty-crying.jpg

not that we need to keep re-visiting this but to clarify my earlier statements in a brief and only semi-trolling way:

1 Several female people I know focus on Bruno Mars' doo-wop voice and old-school trappings (vocal harmonies, dancing, hair) and see him as more original than, say, the average person on ILX or this thread

2 I have seen people actively angry at him for these things here, don't know what's different between the way he does this and say the retro thing of Raphael Saadiq / Janelle Monae / etc.

3 People also seem hurt that he is a very successful singer and songwriter and producer; I don't care if people don't like his songs -- I obv don't mind a few of them and actively like others -- but are we really going back to days of "fuck that guy he's a sellout" or "authenticity check" or the like?

4 I would hope people (and esp that tall drink of water some dude) wd know the minor facetiousness of my earlier comment about America but I still don't know if this is actively not liking the song or passively being pissed about success of said song

5 Repeat point 4 except substitute "Bruno Mars" for "the song"

how do you focus on his retro aesthetic AND see him as original? idgi

also i don't think what people dislike about him or his songs, here or elsewhere, has much to do with the old school aesthetic. the songs that get the most hate ("The Lazy Song," "Billionaire," etc.) aren't particularly old fashioned.

also where is the sellout/authenticity thing even coming from? strawmen galore over here. i think people are in general agreement that dude is talented, has a nice voice and can write a catchy tune, the dischord mainly has to do with what he actually does with that talent.

XP In re: "originality": because instead of doing what most other people are doing (hard-ass Chris Brown aggressive dancing etc) he's doing something different and not seen as much(James Brown / Sam Cooke influence) etc. Not everyone has to be Bjork to seem original yknow.

That's a fair point about "Lazy Song" and "Billionaire" (the crappiness of which is as much about Travis McCoy's basic unlikability), but doesn't address what I think is the main think people (except you!) like about "Fuck You": it sounds like an old kind of song, but it has profanities in the chorus (Lily Allen callback) AND the bridge where Cee-Lo gets E-mo in an Old-schoo way

I have also just reached the limit of me caring about all this

BUT AMERICA WILL CARRY THE TORCH FOR ME

fair enough. i don't even see where any of those bullet points even ties into the thing about women liking him more than men, but i'm not gonna drag it out if your interest in this is even more quickly evaporating than mine.

point #1 was the relevant one here. to WAY overgeneralize (like I have already done so why not continue down that path) I don't hear/see/read any women in the real world talking about "I hate that guy's guts" or "he's shitting all over his own talent" or "Grenade? more like Lemonade haha am I right?" instead, they buy the records, they actually enjoy his performances on TV, etc.

funny thing is i WANT to like him more than i do, he reminds me of a lot of people i'm a fan of, like he could be a less R&B ne-yo or a more pop patrick stump, and he seems likable enough, but his music just has very low hit rate for me.

Well, he's pretty young, right? Plenty of time for him.

yeah he could improve with time. i guess there's a bit of a suspicion that people who are THAT successful that early in their career tend not to mess with the formula from there, whether or not that's really true.

man i really dislike this bruno mars person

I mostly like him, except "The Lazy Song" make me want to watch him die a slow, incredibly painful and brutal death, preferably in front of all of his loved ones

"yound wild & free" is ok, and yes it is more than superficially similar to "toot it & boot it."

otherwise i really can't stand all of these.

I love Grenade because it is so ridiculous and floridly melodramatic, but that's because it is funny to me.

He's the thinking-man's Jason DeRulo.

Bruno Mars is a talented songwriter (if you don't agree then just admit you don't like pop and be okay with it, it's really not a big deal)

hahahaha fuck off m8

"the worst of these are seriously some of the most atrocious songs of my lifetime"

This resonates. "the Lazy Song", "When I Was Your Man", "Just The Way You Are", "Marry You", "Billionaire" - this is a trail of devastation with few parallels. Mars does actually remind me a bit of Billy Joel, in that he tends to write the kind of songs that one could imagine a really irritatingly precocious 10 year old coming up with and being really pleased with.

is sassarfrasco not only getting trinidad james mixed up with james brown, but mystikal mixed up with bruno mars?

xp to the guy upthread who doesn't like the "language in Uptown Funk: the radio edit says "trick" instead of "bitch" so you can play that version for your nephew (although is a prostitution reference any better than a common meaningless swear word, despite the former somehow being less explicit in our culture?)

IMO Uptown Funk is a bit too knowing for me to enjoy it unconditionally, but it is damn catchy. But the firs time I heard it I was in the car with my mom and she went "ooh I like this, this sounds so 70s" and to me it sounds like thats exactly what Mars and Ronson wanted. I like throwbacks, but such self-conscious, purposeful, targeted throwbacks leave a bad taste in my mouth.

http://www.slate.com/blogs/browbeat/2015/01/13/uptown_funk_mark_ronson_and_bruno_mars_hit_no_1_on_the_billboard_chart_why.html

That article has more hotlinks than a wikipedia page, wtf

http://f.cl.ly/items/3D2S2i3U2T402p12470T/slate_article.png

http://f.cl.ly/items/0s440i0o3Y113R1z3Z3o/youtube.png

http://f.cl.ly/items/121J3z011k3P2K3z2c3O/itunes.png

http://f.cl.ly/items/2N1E3C2C2f0B0j1k2q0a/spotify.png

lol

lmao

went to Burger King for once and "Grenade" comes on. I like Bruno Mars plenty, whether it's his traditional pop, or 80s throwback funk, but I've always hated this song. but today I figured out why I hate it so much - it's like a middle school love letter that describes all of the sucky things someone would do for the person they loved, and sticking to one rhyme.

I would catch a grenade for ya
I would injure Dwyane Wade for ya
I would talk like Sling Blade for ya
I would buy a Kincaid for ya
I would get shitty grades for ya
I'd subscribe to Parade for ya
I'd lose on Nick Arcade for ya