Movies That Were Probably Made By a Spasm of Six Year-Olds on Acid: The Top 75 Action Films Poll Results Thread

everyone h8s temple of doom is my understanding

psychomania. that's what they played late at night on t.v. all the time when i was a kid.

And that one, yes!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v212/etienne_saint/dirtyharry.png

#71

DIRTY HARRY

Don Siegel
1971
United States
(165 points, 7 votes)

I have decided I need to see about adopting Inspector Callahan's no-cursing policy of dry sarcasm and cruel disregard for vanity as opposed to my usual sailorstyle shit fuck piss ass bitch banter (starting with muttering "swell" and "marvelous" when receiving, uh, new information).

― El Tomboto

Robinson couldn't fire a gun without screwing his eyes shut and flinching, so they had to stop filming and send him off to a shooting range for a couple of days. Even after that you can still see him blinking whenever he fires. His performance is excellent though, just the simple bit where he's walking across the rooftop tearing up the piece of newspaper does so much to establish that the character is evil.

― snoball

the first "dirty harry" at least is fantastic. i love that shot where the camera just flies back when harry finally confronts scorpio on the football field.

― J.D.

DIRTY HARRY

everyone h8s temple of doom is my understanding

― lag∞n, Monday, February 13, 2012 11:14 AM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

maybe i was the only one to vote for it

i went to the same school as andrew robinson! for a year. they had a framed picture of him in the school library. he's awesome. now and then.

o damn, its startin already! temple of doom i havent seen since i was a p small kid, but it was real scary to me back then...

i voted for two bond movies, but goldfinger wasnt one of them, but it's a good'un

you're picking great shots for the pics!

i had to check to make sure i didn't vote for all of the first three indiana jones movies but nope no temple, i can breathe easy

surprised that temple of doom placed so low... also surprised to find myself voting it so high on my ballot. i guess when you have an opening like that the rest of the movie could have feature garfield and i would have voted it high

haha this is so OTM

sorry for not voting ;_;

it never clicked with me until now, but looking at that dirty harry pic its clear that harry callahan is the most badass sweater vest-wearer in cinema history

it was your #3, AP!

― omar little, Monday, February 13, 2012 11:13 AM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Ha! Just went back and reviewed my list. Wild Bunch & Seven Samurai got top billing, so my votes are less cracked out than I remember.

it never clicked with me until now, but looking at that dirty harry pic its clear that harry callahan is the most badass sweater vest-wearer in cinema history

suddenly Santorum makes sense

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v212/etienne_saint/hurtlocker-1.jpg

#69 (TIE)

THE HURT LOCKER

Kathryn Bigelow
2009
United States
(167 points, 8 votes)

There were a bunch of times that Bigelow's choices in Hurt Locker had me muttering to myself "100% pure adrenaline" or other quotes from Point Break. Especially the drinking scenes. She loves to shoot scenes of dudes hangin' out.

― Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic)

lemme just say that all other merits aside there are some really stunning shots in this pic

― all yoga attacks are fire based (rogermexico.)

Finally saw the Hurt Locker, which I really liked.

I do wonder if Jeremy Renner's character ended up leaving his family again because the way his wife cleaned mushrooms was beyond the pale. Who soaks them in a tub of water?

― ô_o (Nicole)

kathryn bigelow

finally, someone running away from an explosion

not my bigelow of choice, but def a dope, tight little movie. also, a really cool title

I voted Raiders and left out Temple. I found myself selecting the best and only voting for one of any series.

hurt locker is one of those movies that i think of as not very good but also the rare intersection of oscar bait and ilx bait

i cant pick only one when it comes to like indiana jones and og star wars cuz when they are literally the best-directed action movies of all time it would be silly to just pick a token choice

I agree with you, slocki. In retrospect it was a weird choice.

are you saying you voted for jedi and crystal skulls?

is it really oscar bait? i still find its win kinda mystifying, only past winner i'd really compare it to is like The French Connection (or i guess Platoon)

the irl guy who it was based off of is apparently even more unhinged in reality, and is really notorious in the EOD community

are you saying you voted for jedi and crystal skulls?

― some dude, Monday, February 13, 2012 10:33 AM (6 seconds ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

obv I voted for phantom menace

are you saying you voted for jedi and crystal skulls?

― some dude, Monday, February 13, 2012 11:33 AM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i did vote for jedi! (but rather lower on the list)
i didnt vote for crystal skulls though, it's not as bad as the star wars prequels but not nearly the level of the others. i'm not saying you HAVE to vote for ALL of them, but there's no reason not to vote for more than one in a series if multiple entries are dope

yeah i guess it's not fair to call any oscar winner an oscar bait although there are some ways that i think it's reasonable to call it that

there is a reason! to make room for other flicks!

hurt locker is SO not oscar bait

oscar bait is like, expensive studio bought & paid for shit like "chocolat"

yeah i feel you s1ocks -- i meant to vote for all three o.g. SW movies but somehow i left out SW itself

go away, baitin'

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v212/etienne_saint/diehard3.jpg

#69 (TIE)

DIE HARD WITH A VENGEANCE

John McTiernan
1995
United States
(167 points, 6 votes)

Die Hard With A Vengeance is a blast. It's too damn long and episodic - they clearly hadn't worked out how to end the thing - but it's got too many classic Die Hard lines to be discounted. OK, it was a weird move for the series to become a chase all around town instead of a confined-space thing, but there are other ways in which it fits into the lineage - mainly the great fake-out by the bad guy. And possibly my favorite line ever by John McClane, over a truck CB: Attention! Attention! Nils is dead! I repeat, Nils is dead, fuck-head!

― Doctor Casino

did you guys know Die Hard With A Vengeance is kind of an amazing, amazing movie?

― TOMBOT

the "annoying criminal mastermind" thing is the only reason that Die Hard With A Vengeance was even remotely watchable

― bernard snowy

i struggled with the jedi question but i still think it, like temple of doom, has some pretty all-time stuff in it

haha of all the movies i'd cite as archetypical oscar bait i wouldn't have gone for 'that chick flick about the chocolaterie'

http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2001/03/04/PK146052.DTL&ao=all

juliette binoche, judi dench, general faux-foreignness, miramax...

but you can pretend i said 'the shipping news' or any other lasse hallstrom movie instead haha

Still bothered (from a realism standpoint and just because it didn't fit into the narrative) by the scene in The Hurt Locker where an EOD team turns into a sniper team.

Bummed I didn't vote - would have voted for the first three Indy movies and all three Bournes no doubt.

thing about hurt locker is, when the movie showed at toronto the year before it came out, they weren't even sure it was gonna get a theatrical release!

DHWAV is really cool, didnt vote for it but its a strong movie

yeah, it definitely faced a lot of commercial resistance for, y'know, not being much of an action movie (xpost)

yeah hurt locker is a small and mean Man Movie, a very atypical BP winner imo

Star Wars is great, but it didn't make my top 50. I think mostly due to going to the theatre to see the re-release of New Hope and being all fuck it I give up on this fucker.

true (shameless name-droppy story): after the first tiff press screening i went to the film's publicist office to try and book an interview with k-bigs and she was standing there in the hotel suite getting her hair done up by her pr rep. i told her i'd just been to the screening and she really nervously, charmingly, interrogated me on how it went.. "do you think people liked it??"

i struggled with the jedi question but i still think it, like temple of doom, has some pretty all-time stuff in it

― the jazz zinger (s1ocki), Monday, February 13, 2012 11:39 AM (4 minutes ago) Bookmark

you know whats weird is that i didnt vote for any spielberg even though i consider him the greatest action director probably ever to live

that is weird!

not even ALWAYS?

lol

oh man, Die Hard With A Vengeance is such a great movie

^^^

'with a vengeance' probably the best action sequel suffix of all time, too

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v212/etienne_saint/conair2.png

#67 (TIE)

CON AIR

Simon West
1997
United States
(170 points, 6 votes, 1 first place)

This movie is both awful and great, I would rather watch it than pretty much any other 90s action movie.

― jon /via/ chi 2.0

man 97 was a fantastic year for movies

this isnt even the best action classic to come out that year i mean

chapelle is pimp in this but then everyone is p much amazing

― "what a great post" - some (Lamp)

I like the part where Steve Buscemi, infamous child killer, wanders around for a few minutes in the desert, amid the ruins of an abandoned airport, and stumbles upon a pigtailed toddler playing innocently in her back yard.

― Heady Snobbin (Pillbox)

Let Us Civilly Discuss Con Air

No, please? Because that movie involves Cage saying "Put the bunny down" like 8 times.

also lotr villains spotting iirc

Touchez pas au Grisbi
Classes Tous Risques
The League of Gentleman
The Silent Partner
The Anderson Tapes
Investigation of a Citizen Above Suspicion
Milan Caliber 9
Cash on Demand

Wrong effing thread!

yeah bizarro otm

MM1 does show some pretty awful violence against women. Partly because it is an exploitation movie and partly because the story is intended to push Max beyond sanity in the worst ways imaginable. but it’s def not entirely a “fun watch”

i just dont like ppl skipping 1 and going straight to 2. it bugs me.

Has anyone put together a reel of all the scenes in Wild Bunch with the bunch just collectively laughing maniacally?

― Josh in Chicago, Wednesday, February 15, 2012 11:10 AM (4 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i believe sam peckinpah did, it was called "the end of the movie the wild bunch"

― the jazz zinger (s1ocki), Wednesday, February 15, 2012 8:15 AM (six years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i lol hard every time i think of this post

I finally watched Red Dawn over the break (it's on Amazon Prime). Back when I was an actual spasming 6-year-old, I had seen tv commercials for the network premier of Red Dawn and gotten all worked up about it and my parents agreed to let me watch. But within the first few minutes when the teacher and all the students started getting killed, I was horrified and made them turn it off. This time around I made it all the way through! A very stupid movie, but kinda a blast.

it’s so bananas but a deep favorite

pour one out for William Friedkin #14 and #37 in our action poll, #1 in our uh hearts?
or cars, maybe.

https://imgur.com/dKJr4NV

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