fuck the assholes who write copy for Groupon

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Groupon and similar sites here (Scoopon/Living Social etc) just got an absolute panning in the Age yesterday - and the comments on the article were also pretty eye opening. Basically the only way this shit works is oversubscribing the offers, but its the coupon company that skims off all the profit: the stores end up swamped and cant/wont honor deals, and thus the customer gets ripped off too (deals expiring within weeks, but no bookings available, etc)

Put me off ever consideirng using such a system.
http://www.theage.com.au/money/planning/catch-in-coupon-special-offers-20110802-1i8nz.html

Rameses Street (Trayce), Friday, 5 August 2011 03:08 (1 year ago) Permalink

surprised no-one has cross-ref'd this w/ the Innocent Smoothie thread seeing as this reads like it's totally a product of that whole mess

'what's puzzling you' is the name of my dog (DJ Mencap), Friday, 5 August 2011 09:07 (1 year ago) Permalink

do i dare ask

( •ิ.•ั) (gr8080), Friday, 5 August 2011 09:21 (1 year ago) Permalink

wait there's a chain of smoothie shops on the island of brittain called innocent smoothies?

( •ิ.•ั) (gr8080), Friday, 5 August 2011 11:55 (1 year ago) Permalink

it's a brand, like fresh samantha or odwalla or whatever

Dark Noises from the Eurozone (Tracer Hand), Friday, 5 August 2011 11:56 (1 year ago) Permalink

I still maintain it sounds like a teenie porn site.

jaymc, Friday, 5 August 2011 12:30 (1 year ago) Permalink

again, like fresh samantha

Dark Noises from the Eurozone (Tracer Hand), Friday, 5 August 2011 12:33 (1 year ago) Permalink

Ha, I don't know what Fresh Samantha is, but OK.

jaymc, Friday, 5 August 2011 12:37 (1 year ago) Permalink

imagine anything with variations on 'fresh' or 'natural' in the name can prolly sound like teenie porn if you strain enough

'what's puzzling you' is the name of my dog (DJ Mencap), Friday, 5 August 2011 12:40 (1 year ago) Permalink

Has anyone else started getting Groupon-like deals from Amazon in their inbox every day?

jaymc, Friday, 5 August 2011 12:44 (1 year ago) Permalink

no, because i immediately unsubscribe from any bullshit like that and so should you!

Dark Noises from the Eurozone (Tracer Hand), Friday, 5 August 2011 12:51 (1 year ago) Permalink

Beats me how companies come up with the "value" of these "deals." Like, "A $110 value can now be had for $70!" Well obviously it's really worth $70. It's like a department store sale where the "original retail price" is so high that no one would pay it, but the "sale" price is exactly what the going rate is, the sweet spot. To me Groupon is just advertising under a thin guise.

calstars, Friday, 5 August 2011 13:00 (1 year ago) Permalink

no no it's because they actually want to give you a really good deal! they are just being super-nice!

Dark Noises from the Eurozone (Tracer Hand), Friday, 5 August 2011 13:03 (1 year ago) Permalink

http://posiescafe.com/wp/?p=316

nh (cozen), Friday, 5 August 2011 13:03 (1 year ago) Permalink

^one cafe owner's groupon experience

nh (cozen), Friday, 5 August 2011 13:04 (1 year ago) Permalink

I think the only Groupons that I've bought are for restaurants, and I have been able to get some decent discounts.

The one time it sort of burned me is when I went to an Indian restaurant with Eazy, and we realized that we were just shy of the $40 minimum order that the Groupon required, so we ordered a couple of drinks, but then that put us far enough over $40 that the Groupon essentially just paid for our drinks but didn't save us any money on on our original intended order.

jaymc, Friday, 5 August 2011 13:44 (1 year ago) Permalink

I got a pretty awesome $25 groupon for a local bar that has a great scotch selection. It didn't exclude drinks, so we just sat around drinking $10 glasses of scotch

mh, Friday, 5 August 2011 14:18 (1 year ago) Permalink

Beats me how companies come up with the "value" of these "deals." Like, "A $110 value can now be had for $70!" Well obviously it's really worth $70. It's like a department store sale where the "original retail price" is so high that no one would pay it, but the "sale" price is exactly what the going rate is, the sweet spot. To me Groupon is just advertising under a thin guise.

― calstars, Friday, August 5, 2011 3:00 AM (5 hours ago) Bookmark

i havent read cozen's link yet but ive talked to a few (bar and restaurant) business owners who fucked with groupon and said they actually take an incredible loss but its worth it for the marketing

( •ิ.•ั) (gr8080), Friday, 5 August 2011 19:06 (1 year ago) Permalink

also calstars do you know how Groupon works? in most cases you get a gift certificate worth X amount of dollars for half the listed price.

i mean unless you're on some wake up sheeple ~what is value really~ shit

( •ิ.•ั) (gr8080), Friday, 5 August 2011 19:08 (1 year ago) Permalink

there are plenty of groupon horror stories -- i think gawker ran one of their exposes or w/e

J0rdan S., Friday, 5 August 2011 19:09 (1 year ago) Permalink

Does the entire Innocent Smoothies aesthetic strike you as deeply fucking irritating?

― 'what's puzzling you' is the name of my dog (DJ Mencap), Friday, August 5, 2011 7:11 AM (7 hours ago) Bookmark

btw this is easily one of the most lasting thread titles on ilx for me. idk shit about innocent smoothies but at least once a week i'm think "god, what a deeply fucking irritating aesthetic" to myself

J0rdan S., Friday, 5 August 2011 19:10 (1 year ago) Permalink

Dry, but another reason it's going to be interesting to see whether they boom or bust:

http://www.bloomberg.com/news/2011-08-04/groupon-s-strikeouts-reveal-an-unspoken-truth-jonathan-weil.html

saint dominic's p4k review (Eazy), Friday, 5 August 2011 19:35 (1 year ago) Permalink

groupon is p. wack imo, but i can't say i have tons of sympathy for cafe owners who don't even understand what their basic expenses are.

call all destroyer, Friday, 5 August 2011 19:44 (1 year ago) Permalink

I almost feel bad for small restaurants who have no idea how to actually do coupons and get talked into a ridiculous deal with Groupon. But then, I remember that they're running a business and there are about a million and one ways they could screw up and that is just one

mh, Friday, 5 August 2011 19:45 (1 year ago) Permalink

its it like 70% of restaurants close down in their first year? i get so sad when i see a new restaurant closing, wether i ever ate there or not-- cause i know it means someone's hopes and dreams and hard work have been smashed to pieces, and its probably all their own fault

( •ิ.•ั) (gr8080), Friday, 5 August 2011 19:53 (1 year ago) Permalink

isn't it like

( •ิ.•ั) (gr8080), Friday, 5 August 2011 19:53 (1 year ago) Permalink

There are many groupon horror stories, which are a drop in the bucket of businesses that end up happy w groupon. Theyve made stats about it public and the vast majority of places have positive results

I do find the copy annoying, groupons are obviously worthwhile sometimes

Gatsby was a success, in the end, wasn't he? (D-40), Friday, 5 August 2011 19:54 (1 year ago) Permalink

Fwiw re: hiring "real copywriters" - thats... Exactly what they've done. They've also got a ful editorial team that comes out of like textbook publishing. And apparently, based on market research, this kind of copy works rlly well w their target demo so

Gatsby was a success, in the end, wasn't he? (D-40), Friday, 5 August 2011 19:56 (1 year ago) Permalink

Not defending it I think the companies aesthetic is corny but they employ gajillions of writers with salaried positions so kudos to them

Gatsby was a success, in the end, wasn't he? (D-40), Friday, 5 August 2011 19:58 (1 year ago) Permalink

haha i think that makes me even more angry about it

xpost re: this annoying style working well w/ their target audience

( •ิ.•ั) (gr8080), Friday, 5 August 2011 19:58 (1 year ago) Permalink

they kind of stole the house style of woot.com

mh, Friday, 5 August 2011 20:00 (1 year ago) Permalink

They've also got a ful editorial team that comes out of like textbook publishing.

One of my coworkers left here (you know where I work) to take a job as a copy editor at Groupon. Paid substantially better.

jaymc, Friday, 5 August 2011 20:04 (1 year ago) Permalink

its it like 70% of restaurants close down in their first year? i get so sad when i see a new restaurant closing, wether i ever ate there or not-- cause i know it means someone's hopes and dreams and hard work have been smashed to pieces, and its probably all their own fault

And then I see the CANCUN CYBER CAFE setting its grand opening off of the main drag through the blue-collar part of town and smdh.

≝ (Pleasant Plains), Friday, 5 August 2011 20:06 (1 year ago) Permalink

Dry, but another reason it's going to be interesting to see whether they boom or bust:

http://www.bloomberg.com/news/2011-08-04/groupon-s-strikeouts-reveal-an-unspoken-truth-jonathan-weil.html

― saint dominic's p4k review (Eazy), Friday, August 5, 2011 9:35 AM (41 minutes ago) Bookmark

wow, even with their accounting practices they're prioritizing retarded meaningless cutsey bullshit!!!

( •ิ.•ั) (gr8080), Friday, 5 August 2011 20:18 (1 year ago) Permalink

Well thats because they have a product anyone can sell, so branding is everything

Gatsby was a success, in the end, wasn't he? (D-40), Friday, 5 August 2011 20:21 (1 year ago) Permalink

If their target demo is idiots, then I understand the approach. I only figured they weren't professional copywriters because of some NY Times article ... it talked about Groupon hiring poets, musicians, and journalists to write these things. They read like the creations of some brain-damaged inmate on the cusp of becoming an outsider-art curiosity.

Spectrum, Friday, 5 August 2011 20:21 (1 year ago) Permalink

they read like a theater kid's blog posts

( •ิ.•ั) (gr8080), Friday, 5 August 2011 20:22 (1 year ago) Permalink

I think they sound like underpaid, low-experience copywriters trying to sound cutesy.

It'd be pretty great if they had actual mentally-unbalanced people

mh, Friday, 5 August 2011 20:22 (1 year ago) Permalink

gr80 otm actually

mh, Friday, 5 August 2011 20:23 (1 year ago) Permalink

Well they hire lots of those too but the writing style is a v strict house style. I should backpedal slightly here - they don't want pro ad copywriters or something, just ppl who can nail the aesthetic

Lol grady they employ and the style was created by chicago improv kids

Gatsby was a success, in the end, wasn't he? (D-40), Friday, 5 August 2011 20:24 (1 year ago) Permalink

Yeah, theater kids is probably closer. I just like the idea that the whole Groupon creative campaign is the brainchild of a lone man in a padded cell drooling all over himself. Or really any campaign for that matter. "Make this ad about baloney!!" "But we're selling photo albums." "Trust me!"

Spectrum, Friday, 5 August 2011 22:03 (1 year ago) Permalink

huh, thought i posted something on this thread. it probably ended up in the Blink 182 thread or something.

i just think it's insane that there's no limit to the coupons. like, how are businesses supposed to plan for that?

Dark Noises from the Eurozone (Tracer Hand), Friday, 5 August 2011 22:05 (1 year ago) Permalink

haha i JUST NOW got the pun in this stupid company's name...!? wtf @ me.

Dark Noises from the Eurozone (Tracer Hand), Friday, 5 August 2011 22:06 (1 year ago) Permalink

Lol grady they employ and the style was created by chicago improv kids

― Gatsby was a success, in the end, wasn't he? (D-40), Friday, August 5, 2011 10:24 AM (1 hour ago) Bookmark

haha knew it.

( •ิ.•ั) (gr8080), Friday, 5 August 2011 22:08 (1 year ago) Permalink

I basically just think the meme about them fucking over businesses is basically untrue. Its like an ebay store w a 98% positive rating and a really large number of sales. They are impish for having a v v responsive customer service dept; the one time I thought I got fucked over by a coupon they did a full refund immediately

Gatsby was a success, in the end, wasn't he? (D-40), Friday, 5 August 2011 22:26 (1 year ago) Permalink

Lol they are impish!! They are KNOWN

Gatsby was a success, in the end, wasn't he? (D-40), Friday, 5 August 2011 22:27 (1 year ago) Permalink

lol i was going to spend at least 5 minutes trying to figure out what you meant there

call all destroyer, Friday, 5 August 2011 22:29 (1 year ago) Permalink

autocorrect the news

Dark Noises from the Eurozone (Tracer Hand), Friday, 5 August 2011 23:01 (1 year ago) Permalink

do we have a thread dedicated to deej's phone fucking up his posts yet

( •ิ.•ั) (gr8080), Friday, 5 August 2011 23:18 (1 year ago) Permalink

Celebrate the Man Who Gave Birth to You

He felt you grow and kick inside of him for nine months—
thank him with deals on Father's Day gifts.

does Groupon know something about my father that I don't

that is a weird thing to bring up over lean cuisine (DJP), Wednesday, 30 May 2012 17:29 (11 months ago) Permalink

Yes.

carl agatha, Wednesday, 30 May 2012 17:33 (11 months ago) Permalink

h8 when Groupon writers try to be "funny"

heated debate over derpy hooves (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Wednesday, 30 May 2012 17:38 (11 months ago) Permalink

I always think of this guy when I read the "funny" groupon copy:

Respectfully, Tyrese Gibson (Nicole), Wednesday, 30 May 2012 18:26 (11 months ago) Permalink

hahahaha

that is a weird thing to bring up over lean cuisine (DJP), Wednesday, 30 May 2012 18:27 (11 months ago) Permalink

11 months pass...

I was waiting for it, and it delivered in the last sentence

tweeship journey to 77 (mh), Wednesday, 15 May 2013 15:25 (1 week ago) Permalink

u_u

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 15 May 2013 15:26 (1 week ago) Permalink

umair haque
‏@umairh
Hey, what is that "1,2,3,4" song that came out a few years back? Was that Ting Tings?

ʎqןıs (gr8080), Friday, 24 May 2013 14:52 (5 hours ago) Permalink

So dip your brush or tune your ear to what’s happening on F Street -- you won’t be disappointed.

amirite?

ḉrut (crüt), Friday, 24 May 2013 14:55 (5 hours ago) Permalink

haha oops wrong "assholes" thread

ʎqןıs (gr8080), Friday, 24 May 2013 14:56 (5 hours ago) Permalink


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