ILE rolling non-slam Tennis thread

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Nadal will be #1 on 18/8. Can't quite believe Fed's slump post-SW19; loss to Simon, near-loss to Ginepri, loss to Karlovic. Thought he might have at least made a fight of the #1 ranking (his form was fine for 18 of 19 matches in Paris, Halle and London); I had this romantic notion of the baton being passed as Fed beat Nadal at Flushing Meadow (Nadal's points surge taking him past the repeating champ despite the loss). Fed will be lucky to get out of the sixteens in NYC. Does Beijing have any ranking points?

Michael Jones, Monday, 4 August 2008 00:04 (7 years ago) Permalink

yeah, it does. i think a few less than a masters event for the dudes, a few more than a tier ii for the chicas.

GOD that feels ridiculous looking at it! thinking about how much the olympics mean to, like, track&fielders and rowers and the like, and in tennis it's like...a TIER II.

anyway in other news, THIS is the 15-year-old saviour of the WTA who in the past month has taken sets from both serena and sweta, michelle larcher de brito:

she makes sharapova sound like a trappist. seriously i can't believe she hasn't been asked to stop that bullshit yet, or like MURDERED ON COURT by a deafened opponent. that's not a grunt, that's a scream with a sustain pedal on. i'm not sure i'm going to be able to actually watch any of her matches.

oh and in other news silliams has pissed on her phone at the beach:
sometimes you just long for the days before celebrities discovered how to work the internet themselves :(

(also note "enuf boring stuff" LIKE TENNIS)

lex pretend, Tuesday, 5 August 2008 20:19 (7 years ago) Permalink

you know, i used to watch all the nonslams cuz my stepdad taped them. then i didn't speak to him anymore. i wish i knew when they were on -- i think i'm gonna have to get on top of that!

Surmounter, Tuesday, 5 August 2008 20:20 (7 years ago) Permalink

they're on every week! televised or not is another qn

lex pretend, Tuesday, 5 August 2008 20:22 (7 years ago) Permalink

exactly, that's the thing.

Surmounter, Tuesday, 5 August 2008 20:23 (7 years ago) Permalink

10 months pass...

Blake was asked about the partisan crowd before today's final and reminded everyone he's half English :)

BBC giving it "Blake is just happy to be here" bollocks - dude isn't here to make the numbers up. I think I'll be pro-Blake today, as he does things like this

SB "A Good Story" (onimo), Sunday, 14 June 2009 13:17 (6 years ago) Permalink

Well done Andy!

ailsa, Sunday, 14 June 2009 15:02 (6 years ago) Permalink

Bit of a dull game lit up by a few stunning forehands. Shoddy line calls all day, none of which helped Blake. Well done to Murray on being the first Brit in yonks to win Queen's, which I'm sure won't lead to even more Wimbledon hype.

SB "A Good Story" (onimo), Sunday, 14 June 2009 15:08 (6 years ago) Permalink

I predict Murray will cave under the pressure and be out by round 3.

ailsa, Sunday, 14 June 2009 15:09 (6 years ago) Permalink

he doesn't seem to be the sort to cave under pressure. but a friendly first-week draw would certainly be nice...

didn't watch the Queen's, but watched the Edgbaston SFs (Li d. Sharapova and Rybarikova d. Mirza) and a bit of the final today - Magdalena Rybarikova is a real discovery, such a classic grass-court game! Slices and volleys and good serving! she looks weirdly like Samantha Morton, too. i remember seeing a photo of her from her junior days when she lost some random final - she was posing w/the trophy and seriously looked like she was about to go bowling for columbine. so it was lucky for Edgbaston that she won today!

Haas beat Djokovic in the Halle final this week too.

lex pretend, Sunday, 14 June 2009 15:25 (6 years ago) Permalink

in other news, larcher de screamo gets a wildcard to wimbledon. FUN.

Roz, Sunday, 14 June 2009 15:56 (6 years ago) Permalink

The weird transatlantification of Murray's pan loaf accent has meant I can't actually hear what he's saying - it's just a series of droning noises that makes my ears stop working.

SB "A Good Story" (onimo), Sunday, 14 June 2009 16:04 (6 years ago) Permalink

pan loaf accent

is that how you talk with your mouth full of bread?

Beth Parker, Sunday, 14 June 2009 16:17 (6 years ago) Permalink

It was once more expensive and regarded as more fashionable than the then more common plain loaf. Hence, to speak with a pan loafy voice is to speak in a posh or affected manner.

SB "A Good Story" (onimo), Sunday, 14 June 2009 16:19 (6 years ago) Permalink

How on earth does Murray speak with an affected accent?! He just mumbles.

I found that picture of Rybarikova looking like she's ready to go bowling for Columbine after losing the Wimbledon juniors final!

Fortunately today was more to her liking.

lex pretend, Sunday, 14 June 2009 16:41 (6 years ago) Permalink

Haas beat Djokovic in the Halle final this week too.

!!! interesting result for sure. fed dropped out?

Lamp, Sunday, 14 June 2009 17:22 (6 years ago) Permalink

yeah...Djokovic was lucky to be in the final at all, he had to come back from 5-7, 2-5 down and save 5 match points against Florent Serra (!) in the 2nd round.

lex pretend, Sunday, 14 June 2009 17:26 (6 years ago) Permalink

3 weeks pass...


French tennis player banned for betting found dead

Natural causes apparently.

RIP Mathieu

anatol_merklich, Wednesday, 8 July 2009 15:55 (6 years ago) Permalink

Fuckin' hell. (Though my initial shock was because I thought you meant Paul-Henri Mathieu...)

Michael Jones, Wednesday, 8 July 2009 16:00 (6 years ago) Permalink

Oh right, sorry! To avoid confusion to others: it's Mathieu Montcourt.

anatol_merklich, Wednesday, 8 July 2009 16:08 (6 years ago) Permalink

The Lex's favourite choker, Richard Gasquet avoids getting suspended after testing positive for coke.

The full findings are here (pdf): pretty lol-worthy just for the kissing descriptions and finding out that he was allegedly "contaminated" at a Bob Sinclar event.

Roz, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:32 (6 years ago) Permalink

hingis should've found a french waiter of her own to blame. or maybe just one of the 9494439 atp players she'd slept with.

lex pretend, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:42 (6 years ago) Permalink

her ban ends in january right? think she'll come back?

Roz, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:03 (6 years ago) Permalink

4 weeks pass...

wtf federer?! 5-2 up in the final set, somehow fails to serve it out twice and then DFs on match point in the tie-break to give Tsonga the win.

all credit to Jo-W for stepping it up right at the end, but still... that was some breakdown.

Roz, Friday, 14 August 2009 21:25 (6 years ago) Permalink

5-1 up in the third! :o

at the same time I was watching Flavia Pennetta try to choke away her match - she beat Venus in the last round, and winning this would mean a top 10 debut. 6 match points came and went, double faults on at least two of them, but her opponent was Hantuchova so it was OK in the end.

btw, Serena's post-Wimbledon record = QF loss in Stanford to Stosur and 3R loss in Cincinnati to Bammer, who now owns a 2-0 record over her. The Real Number 1!

am endeavouring to pretend the horrific Clijsters comeback isn't happening. never liked her.

best recent press conference = Marat defending baby sis by telling the press to "go fuck themselves" <3

lex pretend, Friday, 14 August 2009 21:32 (6 years ago) Permalink

obv didn't see the Fed match but am guessing that J-W just started going even more for broke than usual when down 1-5, and everything began going in.

lex pretend, Friday, 14 August 2009 21:33 (6 years ago) Permalink

yep and suddenly firing aces as well when he hadn't been able to get a good first serve in since like the end of the first set. meanwhile fed's serve just went to pieces after that.

also yay dinara fighting back a break in both sets to beat kimmy. would've hated it if she lost this one.

Roz, Friday, 14 August 2009 21:39 (6 years ago) Permalink

best recent press conference = Marat defending baby sis by telling the press to "go fuck themselves" <3

this whole presser was fucking classic.

Q. Now that you stopped, what about coaching her?

MARAT SAFIN: Oh, you want me to hang myself? (laughter.)

Roz, Friday, 14 August 2009 21:41 (6 years ago) Permalink

<3 <3 <3

lex pretend, Friday, 14 August 2009 21:43 (6 years ago) Permalink

Wow, Pennetta will be Italy's FIRST EVER top 10 woman! Both Schiavone and, before her, Farina Elia peaked at 11.

lex pretend, Friday, 14 August 2009 21:45 (6 years ago) Permalink

Meanwhile, Andy Murray becomes the first man not named Roger or Rafa to hold a spot in the top two since forever. More importantly, Del Potro beat Roddick.

Michael Jones, Sunday, 16 August 2009 09:25 (6 years ago) Permalink

i am enjoying Del Pony's hardcourt domination of Roddick v much.

lex pretend, Sunday, 16 August 2009 09:47 (6 years ago) Permalink

Does it mean Del P gets his #5 ranking back? I know he lost a bunch of points in the second half of July. In fact, I'm happy to support Juan Martin today if it makes the difference... ;)

Michael Jones, Sunday, 16 August 2009 09:55 (6 years ago) Permalink

yeah, if he wins today he'll be back at no 5.

lex pretend, Sunday, 16 August 2009 10:03 (6 years ago) Permalink

How is Nadal doing post-injury? Lost an edge, or is it too early to tell?

xyzzzz__, Sunday, 16 August 2009 10:23 (6 years ago) Permalink

he's only played two or three proper matches so yeah still rusty/cautious but he seems to be getting better everyday.

gonna be a great USO - with Murray at number 2, it's likely that Nadal will end up on the same half of the draw as Fed which is just weird to think abt. they've both been at the top for *ages*.

Roz, Sunday, 16 August 2009 11:06 (6 years ago) Permalink

1 month passes...

henin to unretire

mookieproof, Tuesday, 22 September 2009 18:09 (6 years ago) Permalink

can only be a good thing

pfunkboy (Herman G. Neuname), Tuesday, 22 September 2009 19:03 (6 years ago) Permalink

i have no problem with these comebacks, but geez, i wish these "i am gonna quit tennis"-people just announce a sabbatical instead.

also, on another forum i heard a theory that Henin will have a much more difficult time getting back in top shape, since "she's no athlete" and only got to number 1 after years and years and years of hard work.

otoh Clijsters had a kid.

Ludo, Tuesday, 22 September 2009 19:09 (6 years ago) Permalink

"Subconsciously, it might have had an impact," Henin said of Clijster's successful comeback. "But it certainly was not the most important reason."

loooool keep telling yourself that, honey

Roz, Tuesday, 22 September 2009 19:39 (6 years ago) Permalink

Whatever the reasons this is good news.

xyzzzz__, Tuesday, 22 September 2009 19:41 (6 years ago) Permalink

Justine <3

This is only a good thing if we WIN THE AUSTRALIAN OPEN. And everything else. And get that Wimbledon title. And overtake Serena's Slam total.

I love the idea that she's only doing it to bully St. Kim again :D

lex pretend, Tuesday, 22 September 2009 19:49 (6 years ago) Permalink

exactly... like she'd ever let kim be the number one belgian. :P

Roz, Tuesday, 22 September 2009 19:53 (6 years ago) Permalink

lex pretend, Tuesday, 22 September 2009 19:57 (6 years ago) Permalink

Wonderful news. Unless it's a total failure and she runs out of wildcards after a few months.

Michael Jones, Tuesday, 22 September 2009 20:51 (6 years ago) Permalink

This is so hilarious! Welcome back, Justine!

sturdy, ultra-light, under-the-pants moneybelt (HI DERE), Tuesday, 22 September 2009 20:52 (6 years ago) Permalink

women's tennis is so fucked.

mizzell, Tuesday, 22 September 2009 21:09 (6 years ago) Permalink

3/1 To win 2010 French Open

Tracer Hand, Wednesday, 23 September 2009 10:46 (6 years ago) Permalink

Need to point out that 38-yr-old Kimiko Date-Krumm - she will be 39 next month - has just reached the Seoul final, beating Kleybanova, Hantuchova (lol Hantuchova) and Kirilenko in consecutive three-setters! So happy for her. From the bits and pieces I've seen of her this year, her old-school flat strokes are still a joy to watch and she's still a superior athlete to many of the girls half her age. She'll play Groenefeld or Medina Garrigues in the final - surely either are winnable matches.

And the WTA used "age ain't nothing but a number" as the headline for their story :D

lex pretend, Saturday, 26 September 2009 09:39 (6 years ago) Permalink

lex pretend, Saturday, 26 September 2009 09:53 (6 years ago) Permalink

seemed like Edmund got a bit sloppy at the start of the third and Goffin seized his chance, and now he's finally stopped choking is just out-manoeuvring Edmund...

lex pretend, Friday, 27 November 2015 15:16 (2 months ago) Permalink

I've seen lots of comebacks but so rarely such a 180 from "frozen and terrified on court" to "free-flowing and confident"

lex pretend, Friday, 27 November 2015 15:33 (2 months ago) Permalink

Murray really lucky not to be broken there...

lex pretend, Sunday, 29 November 2015 12:34 (2 months ago) Permalink

Goffin flopping => Murray has woken up now

lex pretend, Sunday, 29 November 2015 12:40 (2 months ago) Permalink

Won it.

Otago Imago (Tom D.), Sunday, 29 November 2015 15:09 (2 months ago) Permalink

It is extremely surreal that GBR have won the Davis Cup. Like actually won, not just won a play-off

lex pretend, Sunday, 29 November 2015 17:49 (2 months ago) Permalink

Five years ago they were losing to Lithuania (hats off to Laurynas Grigelis) and facing Turkey in a relegation play-off to drop to the four tier (which would have meant a round-robin in Macedonia the follow spring vs Albania and Norway - I can't imagine Murray returning to the fold for that).

The road back has been that long and would have stopped in March if it hadn't been for James Ward, beating Isner 15-13 in the 5th in Glasgow (though Inglot/Murray J ran the Bryans close).

Hell of a final point.

Michael Jones, Sunday, 29 November 2015 20:05 (2 months ago) Permalink

1 month passes...

Ivanovic losing to Naomi Broady is the first hilarious result of 2016. Ivanovic lost the first set with two consecutive DFs (three total in that game) and down MP ballooned a sitter FH wide. Dealing with pressure as well as ever then.

Great win for Daria Kasatkina over Venus, she's going to be really good.

Halep, Sharapova and Serena all w/d from their first matches rmde

cher guevara (lex pretend), Tuesday, 5 January 2016 09:09 (1 month ago) Permalink

ffs @ halep robbing us of the azarenka match-up, she's so cowardly & basic

ana's fh on MP was so perf <3

uberweiss, Tuesday, 5 January 2016 11:55 (1 month ago) Permalink

kvitova retires too

gr8 start to the year every1

uberweiss, Tuesday, 5 January 2016 12:06 (1 month ago) Permalink

What is wrong with them all, this is week one when they're all supposed to be fresh ffs

cher guevara (lex pretend), Tuesday, 5 January 2016 12:48 (1 month ago) Permalink


cher guevara (lex pretend), Tuesday, 5 January 2016 12:50 (1 month ago) Permalink

i'm enjoying this paszek renaissance

also lol @ bouchard

groovemaaan, Thursday, 7 January 2016 07:51 (1 month ago) Permalink

So, Broady falls to Stephens but that's her best week on the WTA tour since Quebec City in September. And didn't she try and get Ostapenko (who beat her in the Quebec semi) defaulted in the last sixteen in Auckland? She chucked a racket and it hit a ball boy. Broady eventually won from mp down.

Don't follow the tour much so those highlights are the first I've seen of her since she lost to Woziancki at Wimbledon. Backhand is something fierce now.

Michael Jones, Thursday, 7 January 2016 12:57 (1 month ago) Permalink

The Broady/Ostapenko drama was hilarious. Don't think either of them came out of it well. Ostapenko seems pretty bratty (and has form even in her short WTA career, her Qu├ębec runner-up speech last year must have set a record for shortest acceptance speech of all time - it was literally "I'm upset I played so badly, thanks to the sponsors [mic drop]") and was lucky not to be DQed (though it's not like she chucked her racquet particularly hard or angrily), but omgggg Broady's desperation. Never seen an opponent campaign to the point of tears to try to win like that since Ramos Vinolas against Kyrgios last year in Estoril. Broady and Ramos were both technically right but it's probably worse behaviour than just an immature racquet toss. Funny how they kept going at it afterwards too. Broady didn't cover herself in glory on Twitter afterwards either.

Also I swear literally every single time there's drama or beef involving any other tennis players, Cornet ALWAYS pipes up.

Sam Crawford finally getting it together, huge huge power game but she's inexplicably spent three years fucking around in US ITFs.

Wouldn't it be something if Paszek could play consistently well for an entire year. Her BH is so pretty and smooth.

The WTA #s 1, 2, 3, 4 and 6 all withdrew or retired from their first match of the year, well DONE everyone. What's the betting they're all miraculously risen from their deathbeds for the AO.

cher guevara (lex pretend), Thursday, 7 January 2016 13:24 (1 month ago) Permalink

Ugh, as much as I love tennis in my timezone, watching (male) commentators doing the whole Asexual (Though Possibly Sexual) Man Love thing for Jack Sock of all people is... please stop. I mean, at least Roddick back in the day was smashable.

oh, boy, .GIF! That's where I'm a Viking! (edwardo), Thursday, 7 January 2016 13:48 (1 month ago) Permalink

Wozniacki can't even beat her pigeon to make a MM final these days:

Azarenka/Kerber was pretty great until 3-3 and then Kerber completely fell apart, totally scrambled tactically.

cher guevara (lex pretend), Saturday, 9 January 2016 11:34 (1 month ago) Permalink

Didn't get home in time but 61 62 is a DELICIOUS scoreline for Djokovic to finally take the h2h lead over Nadal

Coric is the first teenager in an ATP final for eight years, I knew about the drought of young talent but even so that surprises me!

cher guevara (lex pretend), Saturday, 9 January 2016 16:41 (1 month ago) Permalink

Azarenka is going to win the AO isn't she

oh, boy, .GIF! That's where I'm a Viking! (edwardo), Wednesday, 13 January 2016 09:48 (4 weeks ago) Permalink

Not sure a title run that went Q, LL, Vinci, Q, Kerber really institutes anyone as Slam favourite (nb I don't believe any of the others are exactly on their deathbeds)

cher guevara (lex pretend), Wednesday, 13 January 2016 09:57 (4 weeks ago) Permalink

Makarova just slipped on a beetle

cher guevara (lex pretend), Wednesday, 13 January 2016 10:08 (4 weeks ago) Permalink

3 weeks pass...

berrer/zverev is a nice contrast of styles rn

johnny crunch, Friday, 5 February 2016 15:06 (5 days ago) Permalink

Um, Russia have lost the first 3 rubbers in Fed Cup to the Netherlands. Sharapova is playing... in doubles? Nice dead rubber to keep her eligible for Rio, that. Kuznetsova is now losing to Hogenkamp and Bertens for fun these days.

oh, boy, .GIF! That's where I'm a Viking! (edwardo), Sunday, 7 February 2016 10:35 (3 days ago) Permalink

pretty interesting match between Taylor Fritz and Michael Mmoh in Memphis last night. First time I'd seen Mmoh play, I really like his strokes and his defence was pretty amazing against Fritz absolutely whaling on every stroke. Fritz's power just too much though. A bit surprised Fritz's serve wasn't the weapon I've remembered it being before, or maybe Mmoh can just read it well.

The latest instalment in the tragicomedy that is Donna Vekic's career: losing to Sevastova from 4-0 up in the third set in Kaohsiung.

cher guevara (lex pretend), Wednesday, 10 February 2016 09:36 (3 hours ago) Permalink

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