itt blogs instruct you how to be a man

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i'd say you're otm, but, you're a woman

goole, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 15:08 (3 years ago) Permalink

lol

low-rent black gangster nicknamed Bootsy (DJP), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 15:09 (3 years ago) Permalink

wtf...paolo abdul said this, not paula coelho!

― MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T BE LIVING HERE!! (Local Garda), Wednesday, June 8, 2011 10:33 AM (34 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

lol

xp and lol again

horseshoe, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 15:09 (3 years ago) Permalink

strong Whose Line Is It Anyway vibe from this one

ledge, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 15:11 (3 years ago) Permalink

I misread "crown" as "clown"

low-rent black gangster nicknamed Bootsy (DJP), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 15:12 (3 years ago) Permalink

okay this has to be a joke.

horseshoe, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 15:12 (3 years ago) Permalink

invisible crown is the only one that has made me lol, though

horseshoe, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 15:13 (3 years ago) Permalink

wait you mean you don't already do that?

\(^o\) (/o^)/ (ENBB), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 15:13 (3 years ago) Permalink

Wondering how many of the guy ones were actually written by a woman and vice-versa.

Matt DC, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 15:14 (3 years ago) Permalink

"submitted by [random punter]" on most of the laydeeez ones, betraying the lack of bespoke attention to detail and high quality control as found on the gents blog.

ledge, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 15:16 (3 years ago) Permalink

no serenade no fire brigade just a trypophobia (Edward III), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 15:16 (3 years ago) Permalink

This sounds like the advice of Matt Foley, motivational speaker.

EDB, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 15:16 (3 years ago) Permalink

boobs or butts doesn't matter

horseshoe, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 15:18 (3 years ago) Permalink

it's a puzzle

horseshoe, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 15:18 (3 years ago) Permalink

bums don't matter

blueski, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 15:19 (3 years ago) Permalink

hips don't lie

ledge, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 15:19 (3 years ago) Permalink

that's definitely the most mysterious imo

\(^o\) (/o^)/ (ENBB), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 15:19 (3 years ago) Permalink

194 - I feel like there's some positive in that one though.

\(^o\) (/o^)/ (ENBB), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 15:19 (3 years ago) Permalink

boobs or butts; doesn't matter

low-rent black gangster nicknamed Bootsy (DJP), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 15:20 (3 years ago) Permalink

The No. 159 Rule of a Gentleman

Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way, you'll be a mile from them, and you'll have their shoes.

no serenade no fire brigade just a trypophobia (Edward III), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 15:20 (3 years ago) Permalink

need a gif generator stat

ledge, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 15:21 (3 years ago) Permalink

boobs or butts don't matter
anyone can see
boobs or butts don't matter...
to meee....

burberry kush (elmo argonaut), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 15:23 (3 years ago) Permalink

yeah with the semi-colon i guess it could be read as advising men to be equal-opportunity oglers.

horseshoe, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 15:30 (3 years ago) Permalink

advice that was sorely needed

horseshoe, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 15:31 (3 years ago) Permalink

These need t-shirts!

27 Dresses, 13 Assassins (Eazy), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 15:33 (3 years ago) Permalink

I said if you're thinkin' of being my baby
It doesn't matter if you're boobs or butt
oww!

gtforia estfufan (unregistered), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 15:34 (3 years ago) Permalink

ha

\(^o\) (/o^)/ (ENBB), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 15:34 (3 years ago) Permalink

poll:

boobs
butts
doesn't mattter

no serenade no fire brigade just a trypophobia (Edward III), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 15:36 (3 years ago) Permalink

low-rent black gangster nicknamed Bootsy (DJP), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 15:37 (3 years ago) Permalink

How To Hail A Taxi Cab Like A Man via art or manliness

how does this relate to 'being a man' at all, please someone tell me

burberry kush (elmo argonaut), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 16:07 (3 years ago) Permalink

ugh i dunno, i know it may be tiresome to call bullshit on this gender stuff ad nauseam but it bothers me that "competence at any task whatsoever" is somehow constructed as a "masculine" trait. really?

burberry kush (elmo argonaut), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 16:11 (3 years ago) Permalink

yeah, also, all those directions are completely obvious. i don't mean to be a jerk but how long does it take to figure out the off-duty cab thing? i guess i hail a cab like a man.

horseshoe, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 16:12 (3 years ago) Permalink

"how hail a cab without looking like a dumb tourist asshole"

burberry kush (elmo argonaut), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 16:14 (3 years ago) Permalink

It was about 3 miles from my hotel, so I decided to take a cab.

40% chill and 100% negative (Tracer Hand), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 16:15 (3 years ago) Permalink

Realizing I was looking more and more like a dopey tourist, I gave up and decided just to walk to Katz’s.

40% chill and 100% negative (Tracer Hand), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 16:15 (3 years ago) Permalink

Yeah, I could have taken the subway, but they’re fraught with their own complexities for the uninitiated.

40% chill and 100% negative (Tracer Hand), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 16:18 (3 years ago) Permalink

hey maybe the first step in reclaiming the "lost art of manliness" might be: don't get intimidated by the arcane complexities of public fucking transport

burberry kush (elmo argonaut), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 16:22 (3 years ago) Permalink

For well-known places in town, like the Empire State Building or something, you can just tell the driver the name of the place. But for hotels, friends’ apartments, or restaurants, give the address or at least a nearby intersection of the place you’re going.

okay really?

low-rent black gangster nicknamed Bootsy (DJP), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 16:33 (3 years ago) Permalink

"Where are you going?"
"Jim's apartment."

low-rent black gangster nicknamed Bootsy (DJP), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 16:33 (3 years ago) Permalink

haha

gtforia estfufan (unregistered), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 16:35 (3 years ago) Permalink

I want to submit "how to put on pants like a man"

low-rent black gangster nicknamed Bootsy (DJP), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 16:38 (3 years ago) Permalink

Shit like this is why I let my subscription to Esquire expire.

отдых в Крыму! (Pleasant Plains), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 16:41 (3 years ago) Permalink

Dan, when you put on pants, be amazing.
She'll notice.

40% chill and 100% negative (Tracer Hand), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 16:43 (3 years ago) Permalink

How to Exit a Room Like a Man offers these helpful suggestions, each of which are followed by a full explanatory paragraph:

1. Know when to leave.

2. Stand up.

3. Hold out your hand.

4. Say “Thanks!” and “Goodbye.”

5. Gather your things.

6. Walk to the door with confidence.

7. Open the door.

8. Walk away.

burberry kush (elmo argonaut), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 16:49 (3 years ago) Permalink

the fuck

burberry kush (elmo argonaut), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 16:49 (3 years ago) Permalink

7.5. Fart authoritatively.

40% chill and 100% negative (Tracer Hand), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 16:51 (3 years ago) Permalink

h8 this shitt so bad

brad whitford, witchfynder general (underrated aerosmith bootlegs I have owned), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 16:52 (3 years ago) Permalink

omitting Step 7 can have tragic consequences:

gtforia estfufan (unregistered), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 16:52 (3 years ago) Permalink

2.5 Get dressed.

Terje Chocolate Orange (seandalai), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 16:53 (3 years ago) Permalink

200. There's actually only one woman. She has been replicating herself for untold millennia. Across the ages, her characteristics and needs and desires are exactly the same across all iterations of this single extant woman, incarnated in billions of variable forms. A man is a person. "Woman" is a breed.

brad whitford, witchfynder general (underrated aerosmith bootlegs I have owned), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 16:56 (3 years ago) Permalink


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