itt blogs instruct you how to be a man

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blueski, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:12 (4 years ago) Permalink

MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T BE LIVING HERE!! (Local Garda), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:12 (4 years ago) Permalink

Advice from a jaded bitter dude there.

Matt DC, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:12 (4 years ago) Permalink

I think Noel G and Scholesy need to submit a few entries.

blueski, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:13 (4 years ago) Permalink

finally the way my ex used to bite her lip during non-commital discussions of the future explained

MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T BE LIVING HERE!! (Local Garda), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:14 (4 years ago) Permalink

!!!!!

Matt DC, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:14 (4 years ago) Permalink

braggin'

blueski, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:14 (4 years ago) Permalink

#74 actually works, btw

low-rent black gangster nicknamed Bootsy (DJP), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:15 (4 years ago) Permalink

let's face it

MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T BE LIVING HERE!! (Local Garda), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:15 (4 years ago) Permalink

Go on. Be that guy.

Matt DC, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:16 (4 years ago) Permalink

author obv think all women are incapable of recognising good music from bad

blueski, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:16 (4 years ago) Permalink

hahahahahahahahahahaha oh I would love to see someone terrible at music try #134 on ANY of my musical friends

low-rent black gangster nicknamed Bootsy (DJP), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:17 (4 years ago) Permalink

if you imagine these as written by a paedophile many make a more sinister form of sense.

MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T BE LIVING HERE!! (Local Garda), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:17 (4 years ago) Permalink

gtforia estfufan (unregistered), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:18 (4 years ago) Permalink

"i've just been to the doctors, it's extremely bad ne"

"SHUT UP DARLING!"

MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T BE LIVING HERE!! (Local Garda), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:18 (4 years ago) Permalink

i can assure you that no matter the intent, this shit gets reblogged in total sincerity. i can't go on tumblr to look at menswear blogs without one of these bits of fucked up advice popping up on my dashboard.

― burberry kush (elmo argonaut), Wednesday, June 8, 2011 10:11 AM (5 minutes ago) Bookmark

OK if that's true than that's completely fucked up.

\(^o\) (/o^)/ (ENBB), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:18 (4 years ago) Permalink

"Write a song for her. Even if it's shit you'll be kneee deep in clunge"

The Boy Who Can Go Inside The TV (dog latin), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:18 (4 years ago) Permalink

braggin'

― blueski, Wednesday, June 8, 2011 10:14 AM (3 minutes ago) Bookmark

LOL

\(^o\) (/o^)/ (ENBB), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:19 (4 years ago) Permalink

CLUNGE!?

ewwwwww

\(^o\) (/o^)/ (ENBB), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:19 (4 years ago) Permalink

Not quite sure what this one means in all honesty.

Matt DC, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:19 (4 years ago) Permalink

x-post I think that only gash might be worse euphemism.

\(^o\) (/o^)/ (ENBB), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:20 (4 years ago) Permalink

Yeah, 34. What does it even mean?

\(^o\) (/o^)/ (ENBB), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:20 (4 years ago) Permalink

If a girl admits that she likes _____, know that it took every ounce of courage in her to say that.

27 Dresses, 13 Assassins (Eazy), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:20 (4 years ago) Permalink

haha dan i was kinda o_0 at the gentlemanly wisdom of "if you give her sperm she'll give you a baby" i mean

burberry kush (elmo argonaut), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:21 (4 years ago) Permalink

Str8 rapey this one.

Matt DC, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:21 (4 years ago) Permalink

ledge, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:21 (4 years ago) Permalink

submitted by Garu G

blueski, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:21 (4 years ago) Permalink

This must be a guerilla viral for the new Inbetweeners series, surely?

The Boy Who Can Go Inside The TV (dog latin), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:21 (4 years ago) Permalink

my mind is blown dude. rewriting the rulebook!

MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T BE LIVING HERE!! (Local Garda), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:21 (4 years ago) Permalink

#34 is "it's about the personality"

haha dan i was kinda o_0 at the gentlemanly wisdom of "if you give her sperm she'll give you a baby" i mean

well obv that is ridiculous and not necessarily true, but that's not really the important part of the advice, which is "don't be a dick to her"

low-rent black gangster nicknamed Bootsy (DJP), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:22 (4 years ago) Permalink

are there any actually non-crazy bits of advice here?

The Boy Who Can Go Inside The TV (dog latin), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:22 (4 years ago) Permalink

a couple but not many

\(^o\) (/o^)/ (ENBB), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:23 (4 years ago) Permalink

She will be aroused by the increased chance of you being attacked or run over.

blueski, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:24 (4 years ago) Permalink

ahahahahahahahahaha

\(^o\) (/o^)/ (ENBB), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:24 (4 years ago) Permalink

78 is strange

"Never aggressively roar at her to question whether she should be living in your town"

hmmm...weird, anyone shed any light??

MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T BE LIVING HERE!! (Local Garda), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:24 (4 years ago) Permalink

Latham Green, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:25 (4 years ago) Permalink

the good grammer one is sort of odd coming from someone who is responsible for the sentence "boobs or butts doesn't matter". also "bro's"

thomp, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:26 (4 years ago) Permalink

grammer, yes

thomp, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:26 (4 years ago) Permalink

we have noticed a few people sending in messages regarding the similarity between

http://therulesofagentleman.tumblr.com/

&

http://etiquetteforagentleman.tumblr.com/

For all we know, we started this blog before them and theirs was made recently

For all we know!

ledge, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:27 (4 years ago) Permalink

78 is strange

"Never aggressively roar at her to question whether she should be living in your town"

hmmm...weird, anyone shed any light??

― MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T BE LIVING HERE!! (Local Garda), Wednesday, June 8, 2011 10:24 AM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark

OMG

I died.

\(^o\) (/o^)/ (ENBB), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:27 (4 years ago) Permalink

eh dan i kinda read that first piece of advice as more "if you call her out on anything she will transform into a wretched nagging harpy."

burberry kush (elmo argonaut), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:28 (4 years ago) Permalink

^^^ like my wife

Bert Macklin, F.B.I. (thebingo), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:29 (4 years ago) Permalink

otm that cold sore won't heal itself!

blueski, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:29 (4 years ago) Permalink

OMG

I died.

was going to post it on your wall in case you missed it, hahaha...

MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T BE LIVING HERE!! (Local Garda), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:29 (4 years ago) Permalink

no to chivalry means yes to chivalry

MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T BE LIVING HERE!! (Local Garda), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:29 (4 years ago) Permalink

hey they got rules for the laydeeeeez too

gosh that's a long word

ledge, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:29 (4 years ago) Permalink

Are we already running out of lol material at this blog?

the fey bloggers are onto the zagat tweets (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:30 (4 years ago) Permalink

Okay why is #79 objectionable? Do you think your SO should be the first one to get hit if a car jumps the curb?

eh dan i kinda read that first piece of advice as more "if you call her out on anything she will transform into a wretched nagging harpy."

That is exactly what I meant re: the worst possible interpretation.

low-rent black gangster nicknamed Bootsy (DJP), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:30 (4 years ago) Permalink

hey honey aren't your boobs sore.

Bert Macklin, F.B.I. (thebingo), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:31 (4 years ago) Permalink

but is modern man just a man?

F♯ A♯ (∞), Thursday, 1 October 2015 19:14 (4 months ago) Permalink

Q are we not modern

jimmy falloff (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Thursday, 1 October 2015 19:18 (4 months ago) Permalink

F♯ A♯ (∞), Thursday, 1 October 2015 19:23 (4 months ago) Permalink

I can't believe the Peter Pan page is still live.

I Am Curious (Dolezal) (DJP), Thursday, 1 October 2015 19:32 (4 months ago) Permalink

Thing is, "chopper" is not even the right "wrong" word to use for a helicopter. Professionally, I am sometimes in contact with real military manly-men, who call them "helos." Ultimate manliness comes from knowing the specific type, of course - Blackhawk, Apache, Huey.

Calling a helo a chopper reveals you to be a wussy-ass pansy-boy who got his information about war and the military from watching MASH. Calling it a helicopter reveals you to be a prissy-ass nerd who gets his information from a dictionary.

I fail by all measures, as I can claim neither military manliness nor this weird funhouse-mirror NYT version of modern post-hipster menschiness.

(Although I do make sure everybody's electronic devices are charging before I go to bed. Guilty! If I don't, there will be a cranky 4-year-old up in my grill at 5 AM whining that he can't watch Bob the Builder or play Clumsy Ninja; then it becomes incumbent on me to be just as entertaining as the Internet. Which I am not.)

forbidden fruitarian (Ye Mad Puffin), Friday, 2 October 2015 15:19 (4 months ago) Permalink

uh I learned about it from films and obviously in my life I often have occasion to yell GET TO THE CHOPPER

μpright mammal (mh), Friday, 2 October 2015 15:27 (4 months ago) Permalink

the one about pinned tweets, wtf. i have about 10 pinned tweets, does that make me a cave man?

jill's got heroin (rip van wanko), Wednesday, 7 October 2015 17:14 (4 months ago) Permalink


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