itt blogs instruct you how to be a man

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No.200 - now I know this is a joke. "I love how he only fights with me when nobody's watching. It makes me feel special".

The Boy Who Can Go Inside The TV (dog latin), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:09 (4 years ago) Permalink

wasn't this a rick astley b-side??

MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T BE LIVING HERE!! (Local Garda), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:10 (4 years ago) Permalink

IDIOT. ARE YOU GETTING THIS, IDIOT? OMG WHAT AN IDIOT.

lol xp

blueski, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:10 (4 years ago) Permalink

Elmo that's why I think that the author is being facetious. It's just too ridiculous.

\(^o\) (/o^)/ (ENBB), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:11 (4 years ago) Permalink

if this is a joke it's actually hilarious

but it isn't a joke.

MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T BE LIVING HERE!! (Local Garda), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:11 (4 years ago) Permalink

That last one Local Garda posted is so so creepy.

Matt DC, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:11 (4 years ago) Permalink

i can assure you that no matter the intent, this shit gets reblogged in total sincerity. i can't go on tumblr to look at menswear blogs without one of these bits of fucked up advice popping up on my dashboard.

burberry kush (elmo argonaut), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:11 (4 years ago) Permalink

no. 200: "let her know there's a private world that you and her share that is chock-full of acrimony and bitterness"

djp i really don't have a problem with promoting courtesy, respect, civility, discretion, & other 'gentlemanly' virtues, whatever, but a lot of this 'advice' is just weighed down with so much gender insecurity and total cluelessness.

All I'm saying is that the tone you were seeing in the initial ones you posted seemed like they were reaching for the worst possible interpretation; out of context from some of the later ones, I don't think they are terrible pieces of advice, but taken as a whole I totally agree with you.

low-rent black gangster nicknamed Bootsy (DJP), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:12 (4 years ago) Permalink

blueski, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:12 (4 years ago) Permalink

MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T BE LIVING HERE!! (Local Garda), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:12 (4 years ago) Permalink

Advice from a jaded bitter dude there.

Matt DC, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:12 (4 years ago) Permalink

I think Noel G and Scholesy need to submit a few entries.

blueski, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:13 (4 years ago) Permalink

finally the way my ex used to bite her lip during non-commital discussions of the future explained

MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T BE LIVING HERE!! (Local Garda), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:14 (4 years ago) Permalink

!!!!!

Matt DC, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:14 (4 years ago) Permalink

braggin'

blueski, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:14 (4 years ago) Permalink

#74 actually works, btw

low-rent black gangster nicknamed Bootsy (DJP), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:15 (4 years ago) Permalink

let's face it

MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T BE LIVING HERE!! (Local Garda), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:15 (4 years ago) Permalink

Go on. Be that guy.

Matt DC, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:16 (4 years ago) Permalink

author obv think all women are incapable of recognising good music from bad

blueski, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:16 (4 years ago) Permalink

hahahahahahahahahahaha oh I would love to see someone terrible at music try #134 on ANY of my musical friends

low-rent black gangster nicknamed Bootsy (DJP), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:17 (4 years ago) Permalink

if you imagine these as written by a paedophile many make a more sinister form of sense.

MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T BE LIVING HERE!! (Local Garda), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:17 (4 years ago) Permalink

gtforia estfufan (unregistered), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:18 (4 years ago) Permalink

"i've just been to the doctors, it's extremely bad ne"

"SHUT UP DARLING!"

MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T BE LIVING HERE!! (Local Garda), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:18 (4 years ago) Permalink

i can assure you that no matter the intent, this shit gets reblogged in total sincerity. i can't go on tumblr to look at menswear blogs without one of these bits of fucked up advice popping up on my dashboard.

― burberry kush (elmo argonaut), Wednesday, June 8, 2011 10:11 AM (5 minutes ago) Bookmark

OK if that's true than that's completely fucked up.

\(^o\) (/o^)/ (ENBB), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:18 (4 years ago) Permalink

"Write a song for her. Even if it's shit you'll be kneee deep in clunge"

The Boy Who Can Go Inside The TV (dog latin), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:18 (4 years ago) Permalink

braggin'

― blueski, Wednesday, June 8, 2011 10:14 AM (3 minutes ago) Bookmark

LOL

\(^o\) (/o^)/ (ENBB), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:19 (4 years ago) Permalink

CLUNGE!?

ewwwwww

\(^o\) (/o^)/ (ENBB), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:19 (4 years ago) Permalink

Not quite sure what this one means in all honesty.

Matt DC, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:19 (4 years ago) Permalink

x-post I think that only gash might be worse euphemism.

\(^o\) (/o^)/ (ENBB), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:20 (4 years ago) Permalink

Yeah, 34. What does it even mean?

\(^o\) (/o^)/ (ENBB), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:20 (4 years ago) Permalink

If a girl admits that she likes _____, know that it took every ounce of courage in her to say that.

27 Dresses, 13 Assassins (Eazy), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:20 (4 years ago) Permalink

haha dan i was kinda o_0 at the gentlemanly wisdom of "if you give her sperm she'll give you a baby" i mean

burberry kush (elmo argonaut), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:21 (4 years ago) Permalink

Str8 rapey this one.

Matt DC, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:21 (4 years ago) Permalink

ledge, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:21 (4 years ago) Permalink

submitted by Garu G

blueski, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:21 (4 years ago) Permalink

This must be a guerilla viral for the new Inbetweeners series, surely?

The Boy Who Can Go Inside The TV (dog latin), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:21 (4 years ago) Permalink

my mind is blown dude. rewriting the rulebook!

MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T BE LIVING HERE!! (Local Garda), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:21 (4 years ago) Permalink

#34 is "it's about the personality"

haha dan i was kinda o_0 at the gentlemanly wisdom of "if you give her sperm she'll give you a baby" i mean

well obv that is ridiculous and not necessarily true, but that's not really the important part of the advice, which is "don't be a dick to her"

low-rent black gangster nicknamed Bootsy (DJP), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:22 (4 years ago) Permalink

are there any actually non-crazy bits of advice here?

The Boy Who Can Go Inside The TV (dog latin), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:22 (4 years ago) Permalink

a couple but not many

\(^o\) (/o^)/ (ENBB), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:23 (4 years ago) Permalink

She will be aroused by the increased chance of you being attacked or run over.

blueski, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:24 (4 years ago) Permalink

ahahahahahahahahaha

\(^o\) (/o^)/ (ENBB), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:24 (4 years ago) Permalink

78 is strange

"Never aggressively roar at her to question whether she should be living in your town"

hmmm...weird, anyone shed any light??

MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T BE LIVING HERE!! (Local Garda), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:24 (4 years ago) Permalink

Latham Green, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:25 (4 years ago) Permalink

the good grammer one is sort of odd coming from someone who is responsible for the sentence "boobs or butts doesn't matter". also "bro's"

thomp, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:26 (4 years ago) Permalink

grammer, yes

thomp, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:26 (4 years ago) Permalink

we have noticed a few people sending in messages regarding the similarity between

http://therulesofagentleman.tumblr.com/

&

http://etiquetteforagentleman.tumblr.com/

For all we know, we started this blog before them and theirs was made recently

For all we know!

ledge, Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:27 (4 years ago) Permalink

78 is strange

"Never aggressively roar at her to question whether she should be living in your town"

hmmm...weird, anyone shed any light??

― MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T BE LIVING HERE!! (Local Garda), Wednesday, June 8, 2011 10:24 AM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark

OMG

I died.

\(^o\) (/o^)/ (ENBB), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:27 (4 years ago) Permalink

eh dan i kinda read that first piece of advice as more "if you call her out on anything she will transform into a wretched nagging harpy."

burberry kush (elmo argonaut), Wednesday, 8 June 2011 14:28 (4 years ago) Permalink

From 2006 to 2012, PyroManiacs turned out almost-daily updates from the Post-Evangelical wasteland -- usually to the fear and loathing of more-polite and more-irenic bloggers and readers.

oh, the ireny!

Aimless, Friday, 12 June 2015 05:28 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

i·ren·ic
/īˈrenik,īˈrē-/
adjective: irenic; adjective: eirenic

1. aiming or aimed at peace.

noun
noun: irenics; noun: eirenics; noun: irenic; noun: eirenic

1. a part of Christian theology concerned with reconciling different denominations and sects.

So did they typo or just use an obcure word?

Jim Gillette's unused octave (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Friday, 12 June 2015 09:04 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

ppl seem to be taking the dudestick thing at face value but the pledges bit of its kickstarter give the impression it's a windup?

there was a lot of beer and people doing sit ups, (laughs) (DJ Mencap), Friday, 12 June 2015 10:31 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

Is it intended humor, or is it intended "humor?" Difficult to say.

Upright Mammal (mh), Friday, 12 June 2015 13:52 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

A play on 'chapstick' surely?

kinder, Friday, 12 June 2015 17:28 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

Observant

got bent (mild cheezed off vibes) (s.clover), Friday, 12 June 2015 17:29 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

Idk if you ppl have the word 'chap' so excuse me

kinder, Friday, 12 June 2015 17:33 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

"manly preachers" totally reminded of the POWER TEAM who I would see on late night tv all the time when I was a kid.

They'd break baseball bats over their thighs and tear phone books in half then get serious and talk about jesus for a bit before blowing up a bunch of hot water balloons until they exploded

joygoat, Friday, 12 June 2015 18:44 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

thank you for bringing this to my attention

drash, Saturday, 13 June 2015 19:22 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

power team is the kind of thing you learn about and immediately say wow there must be an everything is terrible video of this, and you'd be right:

gr8080, Sunday, 14 June 2015 16:49 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

oh lord

drash, Sunday, 14 June 2015 17:05 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

I'm not sure if it was a knockoff or minor league Power Team but they came to my (public) junior high when they were touring churches in the area. Since they couldn't mention Jesus it was five minutes of "don't do drugs" and then smashing concrete blocks with their foreheads.

Kiarostami bag (milo z), Sunday, 14 June 2015 17:32 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

All of that stuff is pretty easy to fake if the props have been doctored ahead of time.

Aimless, Sunday, 14 June 2015 17:47 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

I prefer to think God is real and chose to show his majesty through swole dudes breaking objects

Upright Mammal (mh), Sunday, 14 June 2015 18:44 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

^^^

Twee Speech and Crepey Literalism (Noodle Vague), Sunday, 14 June 2015 18:49 (2 weeks ago) Permalink


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