pitchfork is dumb (#34985859340293849494 in a series.)

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that is because kylie is, like sophie ellis bextor, going for a retro- mancuso/levan vibe, with all the classicism inherent in such an endeavour.

gareth, Tuesday, 2 April 2002 00:00 (fourteen years ago) Permalink

Actually, I did try to write about that record in the same way I would have for anything else at Pitchfork. I thought the gag would be better if people really thought we were changing styles, and Spin may be full of ads, but at least the reviews aren't jokes! As far as I know, anyway. Dullness wasn't intentional though.

dleone, Tuesday, 2 April 2002 00:00 (fourteen years ago) Permalink

best e-mail address ever, eh starbar?

dudley, Tuesday, 2 April 2002 00:00 (fourteen years ago) Permalink

Dead right sir. Power shandies all round to the geezer behind it eh?

Sarah, Wednesday, 3 April 2002 00:00 (fourteen years ago) Permalink

From: DWilliams@EQRWORLD.com Subject: NO, Just Admit You Like It Up There

You have completed your learning of life's lessons. Now, you suck ass just like all the other bores before you. Kylie, Alanis? Whatever, bitch. I am sure you already have the defense mechanisms in place so, this will mean nothing but, another exercise in...oh, who cares. Looking elsewhere for reality...or maybe I can pretend to be a rubber worm like pitchwhore.com...here big fishie, look, I rounded 'em up for you in a arrel. A whole demographic!

Not Funny

Dare, Thursday, 4 April 2002 00:00 (fourteen years ago) Permalink

five years pass...

Y'know sometimes they really are asking for it:

"White Williams issues a debut album layered with impeccable influences-- including Roxy Music, Beck, and T. Rex-- and a sense of calculated disaffection."

Well shit SIGN ME UP.

lukas, Thursday, 1 November 2007 18:57 (nine years ago) Permalink

Yeah, that was a bit of a repellant blurb if I ever saw one.

Z S, Thursday, 1 November 2007 19:01 (nine years ago) Permalink

Wait, are you saying that doesn't seem accurate?

nabisco, Thursday, 1 November 2007 19:10 (nine years ago) Permalink

I read 'White' as 'While' and thought "The Saul Williams album sounds like that?"

Ned Raggett, Thursday, 1 November 2007 19:11 (nine years ago) Permalink

it's more that they used that as their _hook_

x-post

lukas, Thursday, 1 November 2007 19:20 (nine years ago) Permalink

The front blurbs are always stripped/condensed summary descriptions from the review inside -- in this case

His songs are thin and languorous, with impeccable influences and the sort of calculated disaffection that comes from an MFA in design and a good weed connection.

nabisco, Thursday, 1 November 2007 19:46 (nine years ago) Permalink

omg that is horrorshow

The blurb >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> the article quote

HI DERE, Thursday, 1 November 2007 20:18 (nine years ago) Permalink

I assume that's an article quote; nabisco, if you just made that up then SHAME ON YOU.

HI DERE, Thursday, 1 November 2007 20:22 (nine years ago) Permalink

why would a critic ever try to guess where a song comes from?

Mr. Que, Thursday, 1 November 2007 20:23 (nine years ago) Permalink

I'm more bothered by beck as impeccable influence

dmr, Thursday, 1 November 2007 20:24 (nine years ago) Permalink

Wait, are you saying that doesn't seem accurate?

The description of "a sense of calculated disaffection", a combination of words that makes me imagine the shittiest band of all time, followed by "recommended" was repellant for me. I guess I like my disaffection to be natural, not carefully planned, so I would never recommend something like that.

Then again, I've never heard it so what do I know and so on.

Z S, Thursday, 1 November 2007 20:29 (nine years ago) Permalink

b-but someone at pfork said "hm, how can we get people to read this review? I know! we'll mention the artist's impeccable influences and calculated disaffection! that'll reel 'em in!"

RIP satire etc

lukas, Thursday, 1 November 2007 20:34 (nine years ago) Permalink

they could have collaged+mis-used _anything_ from the article, and they collaged+mis-used that

lukas, Thursday, 1 November 2007 20:35 (nine years ago) Permalink

The White Williams album reminds me much more of late 10cc and Bread than of Roxy Music. That bit was like the classic "Let's over-hip our influences" review.

I eat cannibals, Thursday, 1 November 2007 20:54 (nine years ago) Permalink

The description of "a sense of calculated disaffection", a combination of words that makes me imagine the shittiest band of all time, followed by "recommended" was repellant for me.

See, this sounds like the blurb WORKED for you -- i.e., efficiently let you know you would probably not like this act.

I agree, though, it looks kind of weird to have such a neutral-to-disparaging summary blurb on a recommended album.

nabisco, Thursday, 1 November 2007 22:04 (nine years ago) Permalink

I like how they gave the new Babyshambles, which is actually tuneful and a good all around album, a 4.0, but gave the first one, which is dreadful and hard to listen to / bloated, a 7.3,

Yeah, it was definitely TWICE as good as the new one. Fuckin' morons.

Erock Zombie, Friday, 2 November 2007 18:30 (nine years ago) Permalink

ugh, "impeccable influences" is really repulsive.

Hurting 2, Friday, 2 November 2007 18:46 (nine years ago) Permalink

(xpost) was that a parody or are you really getting worked up about an internet score for babyshambles

dmr, Friday, 2 November 2007 18:47 (nine years ago) Permalink

He was worked up?

roxymuzak, Friday, 2 November 2007 18:49 (nine years ago) Permalink

wait, i thought the grading scale was logarithmic. like 5 is twice as good as 4. somebody email ryan schreiber to find out.

elan, Friday, 2 November 2007 19:14 (nine years ago) Permalink

shit, now i need to reevaluate all my purchases of the last five years.

elan, Friday, 2 November 2007 19:16 (nine years ago) Permalink

It's actually modelled after the Richter Scale, hence the superlative designations of various well-reviewed albums as either "Reccomended," "Best New Music," or "Whole Lotta Shakin' Goin' On."

Alex in Baltimore, Friday, 2 November 2007 19:24 (nine years ago) Permalink

"White Williams issues a debut album layered with impeccable influences-- including Roxy Music, Beck, and T. Rex-- and a sense of calculated disaffection."

if anything, that reads like a good reason not to check out the album....

stephen, Friday, 2 November 2007 19:28 (nine years ago) Permalink

richter scale is logarithmic xpost

but kudos nonetheless

elan, Friday, 2 November 2007 19:42 (nine years ago) Permalink

yeah sorry the "actually" sounded like I was disagreeing when it more of an "yeah and" thing

Alex in Baltimore, Friday, 2 November 2007 19:43 (nine years ago) Permalink

No band has marked indie's prog revival more definitively than Battles: Their debut, Mirrored, took rock for a set of puzzle pieces, but was ultimately defined by its pictorial sensibility-- each song felt like a cartoon soundtrack-- and the incorporation of jokes into the most historically humorless music in the known world.

latebloomer, Friday, 2 November 2007 19:43 (nine years ago) Permalink

wtf, wtf -- wtf? -- wtf!

Hurting 2, Friday, 2 November 2007 19:45 (nine years ago) Permalink

the incorporation of JOKES

s1ocki, Friday, 2 November 2007 19:46 (nine years ago) Permalink

ya i saw that too... pretty lazy writing

s1ocki, Friday, 2 November 2007 19:46 (nine years ago) Permalink

How can you get paid to write if you don't know what "but" means?

HI DERE, Friday, 2 November 2007 19:51 (nine years ago) Permalink

jokes?!?!? has dude ever read the back of a don cab/a minor forest/whoever cd?

YGS, Friday, 2 November 2007 19:53 (nine years ago) Permalink

That bothers me more in a semantic sense: I think the album has a sense of humor, sure, but I don't know what "jokes" refers to in a largely instrumental piece of work.

jaymc, Friday, 2 November 2007 19:56 (nine years ago) Permalink

joeks, bruv

Ned Raggett, Friday, 2 November 2007 19:56 (nine years ago) Permalink

You can here an interpolation of classic knock-knock jokes in "Atlas".

HI DERE, Friday, 2 November 2007 20:06 (nine years ago) Permalink

<i>jokes?!?!? has dude ever read the back of a don cab/a minor forest/whoever cd?

-- YGS, Friday, 2 November 2007 19:53 (10 minutes ago) Link</i>

"jokes" was horrible word choice on my part--john is right--but come on, do you really think that having a punny song title is the same as making music that is formally and sonically <i>humorous</i>? eh. don cab always struck me as definitively unfunny, they just tried to compensate with SURREAL HEADLINES.

mike powell, Friday, 2 November 2007 20:08 (nine years ago) Permalink

Ha, I didn't even read the review, so I didn't know it was you, Mike.

jaymc, Friday, 2 November 2007 20:11 (nine years ago) Permalink

There is a strong semantic difference between "humor" and "jokes"; they shouldn't be used interchangeably and, based on your followup here, you definitely meant the former.

Also, why did you use "but" as your conjunction? The second clause does not invert, negate, contradict or palpably change the meaning of the first clause (Mirrored being defined by pictoral sensibility and humor is not a condition that lies in opposition to it viewing rock as a set of puzzle pieces), so your sentence winds up not making any sense; you've either left out a critical piece of information or just flat-out used the wrong word.

HI DERE, Friday, 2 November 2007 20:19 (nine years ago) Permalink

There is a strong semantic difference between "humor" and "jokes"; they shouldn't be used interchangeably and, based on your followup here, you definitely meant the former.

Also, why did you use "but" as your conjunction? The second clause does not invert, negate, contradict or palpably change the meaning of the first clause (Mirrored being defined by pictoral sensibility and humor is not a condition that lies in opposition to it viewing rock as a set of puzzle pieces), so your sentence winds up not making any sense; you've either left out a critical piece of information or just flat-out used the wrong word.

-- HI DERE, Friday, November 2, 2007 8:19 PM (4 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

you're right, 'but' wasn't a great choice. i think the idea was to say that though it had this puzzle-like quality--you could talk about how the parts fit together, like everyone does in a math-rock review--it was, for me, defined by these more abstract qualities: its sense of humor, its ability to be pictorally evocative. sure, i get what you're saying.

but seriously--human being here, willing to engage, bristles as asinine comments like the "knock-knock joke" one. furthermore--and i'd never slag scott or mark because i know they're incredibly busy guys--i think you bring the same charges to an editor. just saying.

mike powell, Friday, 2 November 2007 20:28 (nine years ago) Permalink

sorry, you *could* bring the same charges. lord i grow weary of life's endless ironies.

mike powell, Friday, 2 November 2007 20:29 (nine years ago) Permalink

I'm just glad you're writing regularly.

jaymc, Friday, 2 November 2007 20:29 (nine years ago) Permalink

I think I'm pretty much firmly on record as someone who thinks there are a lot of editors out there who aren't doing what they should. This mostly stems from a desire to be an editor (ha).

Also I think the egregious misspelling of "hear" is more offensive than the actual knock-knock joke comment (which was an allusion to a recently-revived ILE thread).

HI DERE, Friday, 2 November 2007 20:35 (nine years ago) Permalink

Joke: pretending "Atlas" has a different lyric when he is very clearly singing

people like to
people like to
eat a sandwich

nabisco, Friday, 2 November 2007 20:37 (nine years ago) Permalink

Also I think the egregious misspelling of "hear" is more offensive than the actual knock-knock joke comment (which was an allusion to a recently-revived ILE thread).

-- HI DERE, Friday, November 2, 2007 8:35 PM (44 seconds ago) Bookmark Link

and there i thought you were just aping my ignorance and carelessness.

mike powell, Friday, 2 November 2007 20:37 (nine years ago) Permalink

(xpost - that's not actually funny, of course: people do like them some sandwiches)

nabisco, Friday, 2 November 2007 20:39 (nine years ago) Permalink

i always heard the "eat a sandwich" bit as "penis terror"

ciderpress, Friday, 2 November 2007 20:41 (nine years ago) Permalink

This Is What You Get: An Oral History of Radiohead’s “Karma Police” Video

jmm, Tuesday, 21 March 2017 18:11 (two days ago) Permalink

What It Felt Like When OK Computer Came Out
sponsored by MailChimp

blonde redheads have more fun (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Tuesday, 21 March 2017 18:55 (two days ago) Permalink

it was the fittest of times, it was the happiest of times

tylerw, Tuesday, 21 March 2017 18:57 (two days ago) Permalink

Thom Yorke bursting into tears over MTV's support for the band is hilarious. Tears sponsored by MailChimp, natch.

Position Position, Tuesday, 21 March 2017 18:58 (two days ago) Permalink

xp lmao

flappy bird, Tuesday, 21 March 2017 19:01 (two days ago) Permalink

I haven't actually read the Karma Police article. I just thought the title was funny, as if Pitchfork is angrily punishing us with an oral history of Radiohead's Karma Police video.

jmm, Tuesday, 21 March 2017 19:08 (two days ago) Permalink

ahahahahaha https://twitter.com/clickhole/status/844270728988033024

flappy bird, Tuesday, 21 March 2017 19:34 (two days ago) Permalink

A fabulous crime is that I actually swallow my gum all the time.

nomar, Tuesday, 21 March 2017 20:15 (two days ago) Permalink

'gum is the impossible meal' is just about the perfect clickhole sentence

an uptempo Pop/Hip Hop mentality (imago), Tuesday, 21 March 2017 20:17 (two days ago) Permalink

Thom Yorke: I came up with the title of the album on the spot. It’s the moment when you give a computer a guitar and say, “Okay, computer…let’s see what you got! Show us your stuff!”

blonde redheads have more fun (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Tuesday, 21 March 2017 20:25 (two days ago) Permalink

What The Hell Are You Doing Here? You Don't Belong Here: An Oral History of Pablo Honey

Wimmels, Tuesday, 21 March 2017 20:31 (two days ago) Permalink

the "karma police" oral history is actually kinda interesting

the raindrops and drop tops of lived, earned experience (BradNelson), Tuesday, 21 March 2017 20:34 (two days ago) Permalink

also would rather eat a nine day-old Whopper sat on by Baron Harkonnen than be forced to read Sir Elton interviewing Misty Joe Fuckface

Wimmels, Tuesday, 21 March 2017 20:36 (two days ago) Permalink

it was the fittest of times, it was the happiest of times

― tylerw, Tuesday, March 21, 2017 6:57 PM (one hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

<333

Le Bateau Ivre, Tuesday, 21 March 2017 20:42 (two days ago) Permalink

also would rather eat a nine day-old Whopper sat on by Baron Harkonnen than be forced to read Sir Elton interviewing Misty Joe Fuckface

An understated reaction there, really.

Separately, missing a Snrub beef is something I am glad of.

Ned Raggett, Tuesday, 21 March 2017 20:51 (two days ago) Permalink

the "karma police" oral history is actually kinda interesting

― the raindrops and drop tops of lived, earned experience (BradNelson), Tuesday, March 21, 2017 4:34 PM (thirteen minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

This post brought to you by MailChimp.

Position Position, Tuesday, 21 March 2017 20:54 (two days ago) Permalink

@pitchfork Catch @TheMagFields founder, Stephin Merritt, in conversation at @MCAchicago April 18—supported by @MailChimp… https://t.co/tL0UUdEXMi

Stephen 'MailChimp' Merritt

Le Bateau Ivre, Tuesday, 21 March 2017 20:55 (two days ago) Permalink

Misty Joe Fuckface

keeper

The sandwiches looked quite dank. (contenderizer), Tuesday, 21 March 2017 21:02 (two days ago) Permalink

The only accurate description of that...that thing.

Ned Raggett, Tuesday, 21 March 2017 21:06 (two days ago) Permalink

that oral history was really good actually

flappy bird, Tuesday, 21 March 2017 21:14 (two days ago) Permalink

Their factually inaccurate Adult. blurb bugged me:

"On their first album in six years, the married electro duo curate a highly collaborative record that is richer and stranger than anything they've done before. It's unusually electrifying."

(Their last one came out in 2013. 🤦‍♂️)

spastic heritage, Tuesday, 21 March 2017 21:31 (two days ago) Permalink

ewwwww their twitter bio is 'the most trusted voice in music' fuck these utter jerks forever

an uptempo Pop/Hip Hop mentality (imago), Wednesday, 22 March 2017 11:08 (yesterday) Permalink

it's their slogan

niels, Wednesday, 22 March 2017 11:34 (yesterday) Permalink

well obviously now i'm reading the recent phil elverum profile/interview/story thing and regretting saying that, dammit pitchfork why you have to be good sometimes

an uptempo Pop/Hip Hop mentality (imago), Wednesday, 22 March 2017 11:46 (yesterday) Permalink

Who died, and who did the killing?

That’s the central mystery of “Big Little Lies,” HBO’s limited series based on Liane Moriarty’s novel of the same name. But like the book, the show does not bask in that single question. It asks so, so many. Like, why does Madeline (Reese Witherspoon) drive a Buick?

http://pitchfork.com/thepitch/1471-how-does-the-first-grader-on-big-little-lies-have-such-killer-music-taste/?mbid=homepage-more-latest-and-video

AdamVania (Adam Bruneau), Thursday, 23 March 2017 03:07 (three hours ago) Permalink

Chloe’s taste in music is not a minor aspect of her character—it defines her. We’re supposed to recognize that early on in the show, when she says to classmate Ziggy (Iain Armitage), “When I grow up, I want to run a massive label.” This girl is a mogul in the making. She’s not thinking of limited runs of hissing cassettes—she’s dreaming of Grammys. Hell, she’s wearing Apple earbuds around her neck in numerous scenes, including the opening credits.

hell, she's wearing EARBUDS. she likes music so much she is WEARING EARBUDS!!!!

AdamVania (Adam Bruneau), Thursday, 23 March 2017 03:12 (three hours ago) Permalink

that oral history was really good actually

― flappy bird, Tuesday, March 21, 2017 2:14 PM (yesterday)

i tried to read it but got bugged early on by the author's claim that the video starts "in media res". it starts with a frigging still shot of the (motionless) car's (empty) back seat.

Balðy Daudrs (contenderizer), Thursday, 23 March 2017 03:18 (three hours ago) Permalink


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