the landfill that time forgot: crap uk bands of 00s/10s

i don't know why i'm doing this to myself... but maybe someone here can help me remember the terrible awful no-good song that was by one of these bands or someone like them. an xfm favourite a year or two ago, lyrical themes: don't be sad, you're still young, remember that time we took a record player somewhere and played some tunes, oh yeah that was top.

xps - I think the band that has annoyed me most often is actually The Fratellis.

the stereophonics - CONTENDERS. honoured too many times for their services to the cause of evil to get my vote here. don't think the dude's suffered enough

he did kill himself to be fair

I was aware of that.

Holloways, Music Generator?

(an answer to ledge, that)

WHERE IS THE SCRIPT

xp that was it. thanks. "thanks". actually the name has not yet triggered any memory of the music, thank fuck.

xp - The Script are Irish iirc.

i have never heard scouting for girls or read anything about them. can someone explain why they are the worst please?

Oh.

God I hate the Script though.

I'd forgotten all about The Zutons! (I guess that's probably for the best.)

hmmmm

i think both the first futureheads album and the first rakes album are classics (haven't listened to the latter in years tbh but i fucked heavy w/ it when i was 17)

i've enjoyed a number of songs by snow patrol, the cribs, and, yes, razorlight

they had that song: the zutons, the magic numbers, kaiser chiefs, keane & hard-fi (i used to bang that one joint that was on fifa 06, maybe it was "cash machine"?)

the band on here that i've heard the most shitty music by is kasabian, and i'd be tempted to vote for them but really i can vote for no one besides joe lean and the jing jang jong, from the shitty name right on down to the fact that they made the cover of NME and still never made an album

pigeon detectives & scouting for girls are runners up

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YVLqo7C-WwA

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XlMfV7A3V00

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4oaOQ1cQwt4

Somehow, for me, The Killers made the song that even more than "Chelsea Dagger" sums up everything that this tremendous movement stands for.

It's a black hole of shite and terror.

bands on this list i have knowingly heard:

babyshambles - horrible
florence and the machine - not my thing, but she doesn't belong in a UK indie landfill poll
kaiser chiefs - horrible, but not as bad as several of the others
kasabian - horrible
keane - horrible
mumford and sons - what the fucking fuck
snow patrol - horrible
the cribs - lol johnny marr
the futureheads - not actively offensive
the magic numbers - not actively offensive
the stereophonics - horrible

voted mumford & sons

wow i had no idea the killers had a song called "indie rock & roll" -- thank god i'm at work and have no way of listening to it

the wombats & the courteneers really bring me back to the time in high school where i used to read nme irl

I first heard the Killers track in a friend's car on a landfill compilation and assumed it was by one of the tossers on the list until I looked it up.

Being completely candid, even though seeing the names listed like this makes my heart feel heavy and grey:

Like one song by: Athlete (1st album), Florence, Hard-Fi, Kasabian, Keane, Starsailor, Futureheads, Magic Numbers, Twang, View
Like a whole album by: Babyshambles, Rakes, Kaiser Chiefs

Voted Toploader.

Yeah, Magic Numbers don't bother me at all, they're sweet overweight aging hippies who like to sing pleasant vocal harmonies.

you know who belonged on here even tho I liked a couple of their songs? Maximo Park

Shiteness rating out of 10

ATHLETE - 9/10: really this is the point where post-Coldplay bands just started taking the piss. Also I think they were technically Christian rock.
BABYSHAMBLES - 7/10: Probably the worst live band I have ever seen but they get a couple of points taking off for car crash/amusement value.
BIFFY CLYRO - 7/10: Would probably be higher if I'd had more exposure to their fans and/or been to Reading in 10 years.
FLORENCE AND THE MACHINE - 4/10 - bit too much in the star quality stakes, also a couple of alright songs.
HARD-FI - 6/10 - awful clumsy shit but they get a couple of points knocked off because Hard To Beat was quite a good song, and they weren't the Ordinary Boys.
HUNDRED REASONS - 5/10 - too past-it and lol to be serious contenders here
JOE LEAN AND THE JING JANG JONG - 7/10 - obviously woeful but everybody knew it
KAISER CHIEFS - 10/10 genuine contenders
KASABIAN - 10/10 genuine contenders, also worst fans ever
KEANE - 2/10 basically too inoffensive
MUMFORD & CUNTS - 20/10
NOAH AND THE WHALE - 5/10 - no one can seriously vote for them when Mumford & Sons exist
PIGEON DETECTIVES - 10/10 worst shit ever
RAZORLIGHT - 10/10 also maybe more for Johnny Borrell factor
SCOUTING FOR GIRLS - 11/10 she's so luvverly, she's so luvverly, she's so luvverly, she's so luvverly, she's so luvverly, she's so luvverly, she's so luvverly, she's so luvverly
SNOW PATROL - 9/10 - they get a point knocked off for making DJ Martian so angry
STARSAILOR - 8/10 - obviously terrible but also kind of easy to ignore to matter how big they were
THE COURTEENERS - 6/10 - some Oasis shit, right?
THE CRIBS - 9/10, dude has one of the worst voices ever
THE ENEMY - can't even remember what they sounded like but I'll assume they were terrible so a straight 8/10
THE FEELING - I don't think I've actually knowingly heard one of their songs, 8/10 as I'm not giving them the benefit of the doubt
THE FRATELLIS - 30/10 - Chelsea Dagger might be the worst thing that any of these bands have put out
THE FUTUREHEADS - 5/10 - feel a bit too credible to be here
THE HOOSIERS - 9/10, stupid name
THE KOOKS - 4/10 - hating on the Kooks feels a bit like hating on Keane, kneejerk "girls like this so it must be shit" hate
THE MAGIC NUMBERS - 5/10 - hilarious strop on Top of the Pops gives them a bit of leeway, also everyone's forgotten about them
THE ORDINARY BOYS - 10/10 - surely they were to 'ska' what Mumford & Sons are to 'folk'
THE OTHERS - honestly I have no idea what they sounded like but the sheer lack of ambition indicated by giving yourselves a name with absolutely no connotations whatsoever gets them a straight 10/10
THE RAKES - even Lethal Bizzle is probably embarassed about this lot now 8/10
THE STEREOPHONICS - okay they might actually rival Mumford & Sons 30/10
THE TWANG - 8/10 - fuck knows
THE VIEW - 9/10 - Cast more like
THE WOMBATS - 8/10 but at least they seem funny in retrospect
THE ZUTONS - 10/10 - die.
TOPLOADER - should fit in the Kooks/Keane mould except for the fact that Dancing In The Moonlight is one of the worst records ever made. 10/10

i have the biffy clyro album with the woman masturbating on the front. i do not recall the name of the record but the image stuck. the singles off that were v good and i suspect continue to be so.

xp re Maximo Park, yeah I'd put em around Cribs level, fine enough in themselves, but too close to the vortex not to get sucked in.

I was gonna vote for someone who may get a bit overlooked (suspect that there won't be too many hundred votes for the fucking Fratellis), but really I want this to be a Scouting for Girls landslide.

Never forget this atrocity. Watch this before voting

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I-oMHPZgKJc

Futureheads wld sit more comfortably in some kind of tru-indie thing with The Young Knives, Mystery Jets etc. Minor mid-decade successes.

You people are all giving The Rakes and The Cribs too much credit.

THE KOOKS - 4/10

way too lenient.

"Well uh oh, oh I love her because she moves in her own way
Well uh oh, oh she ame oo my oh ust oo hear aout eye ay"

kill kill kill

Toploader and Stereophonics are well out-of-time for this poll.

I believe the singer from Maximo park wore/wears a bowler hat, which is enough to ratchet up their score a few points. One of their songs wasn't too bad though, it had a jittery energy to it.

i have never heard scouting for girls or read anything about them. can someone explain why they are the worst please?

― Damn this thread seems so....different without ilxor (ilxor), Thursday, February 17, 2011 9:59 AM (16 minutes ago)

Both Toploader and the Shitophonics had significant 2000 albums out, I reckon they qualify, and they're not synonymous with the previous decade in the way that, say, Oasis were.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xe6coqAoDC0

^^^ Simultaneous nadir of two separate genres, which is quite an achievement.

Rakes' first album also had a lot of jittery energy and enough opacity to get them let off here, if you want to be For Real horrible you've gotta wear them hearts on your sleeves.

We should judge this scientifically by sending the list as a questionnaire to Nick Clegg and asking him to tick off which ones he likes the best. Scouting For Girls would probably win due to repping for him.

singles off first rakes album were great. next couple singles after were good too but then they ran out.

Kings of Leon really should be on this poll, it's what they would've wanted.

Like a lot of their work:
futureheads

Like one or two songs:
hard-fi
kaiser chiefs
kasabian
keane
razorlight
snow patrol
the feeling
the magic numbers
the zutons

Ho hum:
athlete
babyshambles
florence and the machine
starsailor
the cribs
the hoosiers
toploader

10th circle of hell:
biffy clyro
scouting for girls
the fratellis
the kooks
the ordinary boys
the stereophonics

Never knowingly heard:
hundred reasons
joe lean and the jing jang jong
mumford and sons
noah and the whale
pigeon detectives
the courteeners
the enemy
the others
the rakes
the twang
the view
the wombats

Voted Biffy Clyro.

listening to 'she's so lovely'... fuck

xpost Yes, the first Rakes album is so much better than most of the stuff here. They were at least trying to be clever and interesting. Though grindie was obviously a regrettable episode in this proud nation's history.

We should judge this scientifically by sending the list as a questionnaire to Nick Clegg and asking him to tick off which ones he likes the best.

Polls on ILM are fucked up enough without introducing AV cheers

biffy clyro are really really awful and a(nother) stain on my country.

Do you know what's sad? Enter Shikari are better than all of these.

There's definitely a difference between bands where I was lured in by one good single and then loss interest and ones (like the Kooks and Scouting for Girls) where I clearly remember encountering them for the first time and thinking, fuck this for a game of soldiers.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XlMfV7A3V00

This is just the worst. If I had the choice between being forced to listen to this on repeat for eternity in hell and listening to She's So Lovely on repeat for eternity in hell I think I would probably plump for Scouting For Girls.

If it was definitely one or the other I wd become a big-time god botherer tbh

she's so lovely vs dancing in the moonlight vs good enough (dodgy) which one would be the winner for worst song? Im guessing shes so lovely as its the most recent but those other 2 were the equivalent of their day.

Randomly thought of this momentous thread yesterday and it turns out it's ten years old :/

Big thanks to kitchen person in this thread for putting me on to The Radio Dept. - have been thoroughly enjoying their output since last September.

Noodle Vague's run-down of the CONTENDERS from 2011 belongs in some sort of ILM Hall of Fame. It really is staggering how many verifiably awful bands all conspired to become famous and inescapable around the same time. I moved to the UK from Oz in 2005 so I blame myself.

Am I a dumbass for thinking “Shut Your Eyes” by Snow Patrol is a good song?

Remember the band South? I actually liked them and it holds up tbh. Are they a CONTENDER here? Or outside the category entirely?

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-manchester-65558954

pretty funny pearl-clutching in the article:

Fan Saffie Yates, who had waited six years to see the band, said she first thought it was some sort of stunt.

She said: "It was very scary to see someone you respect behave like this.

"The bass player normally plays a couple of songs and it was his birthday yesterday. He wanted to play a third song and the lead singer went for him.

"He punched the bassist. I didn't know if it was part of the act.

"The band left the stage and the fans were hanging around waiting to see what would happen.

funny to see athlete at the bottom. the keyboardist went to my school - he gave a presentation about how the band got started, their influences etc

what was really funny was him talking about how their main influence was, of all things, grandaddy - they were apparently really keen on getting the same kind of decayed, lo--fi vibe as you get on songs like AM 180. i've listened to a few athlete tracks, scouring them for the remotest sign of that influence, and i've never been able to find anything. just another mediocre britpop band

for what it's worth, mornings eleven by the magic numbers still rocks
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TwobxaEoVaM

I interviewed that Athlete guy - Tim W - just before the release of their third album and he was super excited about some of the subtle production tricks on it; they’d just built their own studio and were self producing for the first time. I haven’t revisited it, but we talked about The Outsiders and Flying Over Bus Stops in particular. https://mikeatkinson.wordpress.com/2007/09/29/interview-tim-wanstall-of-athlete/

congratulations to Toploader for their very late challenge for the title

When the revolution comes they can be put on the queue for the guillotine

No queuing for Toploader, I'll open a new guillotine especially

I think in the name of a fairer, non-partisan class enemy cull, it would be quite equitable and justified to execute any bands that play at the Labour conference as well.

i'm pretty sure anybody that performs at a Lab or Tory conference was already on my gulag list on aesthetic grounds alone

I thought you liked The Strawbs?

Ok, saw a tweet saying Toploader are playing at the Lab conference and...it's sort of perfect?

No matter who you vote for, Toploader always get in.

isn't truss on record as liking Onka's Big Moka?

her legacy was more Magic Hotel

this twitter account that posts old photos from getty images is doing a weekend dedicated to 00's UK indie , and it's quite something

https://twitter.com/shitbritishpics

wow.
until now, i have never ever seen a picture of clor before.

ha that Kevin Bridges pic

I'd totally forgotten about the landfill-ized version of the Hollyoaks theme music

If you aren’t sure what any of these bands sound like, then just put this on as it could be 90% of them https://t.co/rTnLZO1AoP

— Great British 00s Indie Images (@shitbritishpics) October 22, 2023

You mean they haven't been using that theme for the entire 21st century?

Symposium are back together, end times

I'm sad I missed this original poll

The right (i.e. worst) two bands came out tops though

But I feel like I have opinions on almost every single of these bands and histories with a great deal of them also.