Innocuous things that make you irrationally angry (a list thread)

117. people who stop in the middle of busy pedestrian through ways to set down their bags to have a chat. sidewalks, airports, malls, museums, wherever.

118. similarly, people who do this with their shopping cart while ogling canned tuna. get the fuck to the side.

^ again, not so innocuous. but make me crazy.

119. people who describe every food they mention as "the most awesome..."

This thread is so hatey on OTHER PEOPLE. I tried to add some inanimate balance with hangers but it's swung back to humanity and it's out of control!!!!!!!!!! Seriously Hell IS other people.

droit de seigneur

Chapstick

elbows

hacky sack

uvulas

Justin Bieber

thumbs

calling tissues "Kleenex"

regional variants for soft drinks that are not "soda" or "pop" (including, ironically, "soda pop")

old Band-Aid(TM) brand bandages

120. other people

referring to the My Life With The Thrill Kill Kult song "(A Girl Doesn't Get Killed By A Make-Believe Lover) 'Cuz It's Hot" as "'Cuz It's Hot"

oh I see Laurel already went there

xp

121. Use of the word "awesome." I realize this battle was lost long ago, but I thought the word was supposed to mean something, well, awe-inspiring. I first heard it used in Star Wars (Luke seeing the Death Star: "It's AWESOME!"). A music professor of mine in college still used it in its pre-80s heaviness, and one day caught himself: "Jimmy Lyons' playing was AWESOME...and when I say 'awesome,' I mean in the way that word was used before people started to use it to refer to pizza."

(I think I told this story somewhere else on ILX...apologies for the repetition)

awesome story!

(choking on my own rage)

122. People who use the word "amazing" interchangably with "very good". NOT EVERY GODDAMN THING IS FUCKING AMAZING.

123. People who quote lyrics out of context to be funny. OH YOU FEEL STUPID AND CONTAGIOUS HUH? HERE, HERE'S A SHOTGUN

louis c.k. has a great bit about standing in line at the post office where the entire line is this seething mass of hatred toward whoever is at the window getting served. and then your time comes. and you're that guy. it happens so fast.

sorry I am one of the hated ones who overuses "awesome" and "amazing". (winces)

Couples at the grocery store who volubly plan their dinner while they're shopping.

125. Hidden broccoli in things that look like they do not have broccoli in them. I hate broccoli enough as it is, but hidden broccoli? SHIT JUST GOT REAL

126. People who fan themselves with a book or a magazine. IT DOESN'T FUCKING PROVIDE YOU ANY BENEFIT AND IT ANNOYS ME.

San Te you are on a roll! (Hi five)

Unles hi fives annoy the shit out of you, then I will happily retract

Hi-fives are always acceptable

*hi five*

As accidentally posted on the Strokes thread:

Some of you must spend 98% of your day walking around in an uncontrollable rage and I feel very sorry for you.

I just assume that people who get angry about pretty much any inconsequential thing just like being angry

made-up statistics

wtf fanning with a magazine totally works can't you fan properly or something no wonder u madd doggie

lol at people who take this list too serious!

It's just fun to vent about ridiculous things. Also typing in all caps IS REALLY FUN YOU GUYS

key words here are "innocuous" and "irrational". Note to onlookers: this is not the "Post your hate manifestos here" thread

would definitely waft myself with ur hate manifestos u disgusting savages

lol: OH YEAH WELL THAT'S JUST GREAT BC YOU'RE IN MINE, YOU WAFTING WAFTER

ppl with short fuses

wafter

People who say 'bless you' when you sneeze. I might be sneezing three times in a row, you gonna do this every time? You want me to say thankyou every time? LET ME SNEEZE IN PEACE.

I rode the train yesterday with a couple, of which the man kept pressing his sweaty back against the upright pole I was holding onto

this is my all-time number one subway pet peeve. like it makes my blood boil when ppl lean against poles on crowded trains, preventing anyone else from hanging onto them

small, wheeled suitcases in busy areas

99. Opening goods in the supermarket & eating/drinking them before you've paid for them (and then handing the opened package to the cashier at the checkout). The only exception I will allow is maybe, *maybe* if you have small children/toddlers with you. But if you're a grown person, surely you can wait til you've paid for the damn thing. It's called impulse control.

^^^this. also i wonder whether the people who do this actually have the money to pay for the items they're consuming. what if they get up to the register and realize they have no cash, and their cards are maxed out, and the store doesn't take checks?

i wanna say "extroverts" are innocuous things that make me irrationally angry but honestly some extroverts really are disgusting savages.

I was momentarily irrationally angry this morning at

127. Too much foam in my latte

Then, thanks to this thread, I caught myself being angry at something innocuous and decided not to sweat it.

ILX: Self improvement - one thread at a time.

when people say "zero" (as in: "this energy drink has zero sugar") instead of "no." zero is a number; you wouldn't say "this energy drink has two sugar").

Small factual errors tend to attract my attention.

E.g. : not angry, more like "tss, typical clueless media people acting all informative but not having a clue what they're talking about" :

National Geographic, series called Megafactories, during the episode on the construction of the Winnebago (yeah, I watch all kinds of shit) :
"(name) is a heat duct specialist. To guide her work, she uses an advanced computer coding and stamping system called Citrix."

Nerd LOLz - documentary makers saw "Citrix" on her screen, so that must be how she controls that tube cutting laser robot thingy, right?
(FYI, Citrix is a desktop virtualisation tool - it only means that what she's doing is running on a server and not on her local computer)