PARIS HILTON

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her voice — which is almost certainly auto-tuned and tweaked by a computer

Almost certainly!

― Steve Go1dberg (Steve Schneeberg), Wednesday, 23 August 2006 06:15 (seventeen years ago) link

Photoshop alert.

YA DONT SAY!

― Nathalie (stevie nixed), Wednesday, 23 August 2006 06:50 (seventeen years ago) link

i think " a few screws loose", "thinks she's hott" and "self-absorbed" as all v good qualities in a popstar.

why?

― Bashment Jakes (Enrique), Wednesday, 23 August 2006 07:27 (seventeen years ago) link

oh fuck it i see that there's been commentary enough on livejournal (including zenith's usual i hate ilx rant).

lex's rhetoric on this one has just been 'everything you think is bad, is actually good'. but the strongest assertions -- that the songwriting is top-hole, that paris's soul comes through blah-blah-rockist-blah, that she has a great popstar persona -- are just bollocks.

i don't see how the thematic breakdown ('her songs are about the search for Real Love!!' yeah and?) helps matters.

― Bashment Jakes (Enrique), Wednesday, 23 August 2006 07:47 (seventeen years ago) link

i'm just... disappointed! by some big old fat lies in the lex's review. scott storch is not 'the best money can buy'. the statement "At a time when a perception of authenticity is necessary for both critical and commercial success" is untrue (look at the pussycat dolls), or just irrelevant -- 'paris' stands or falls apart from whatever the critical orthodoxy is. there's no need to lie, really; plenty of good music has been made by poor singers, so there's no pressing need to claim that paris's voice is up to snuff, when it isn't.

being taken up with prom queen/princess cliches deep in your twenties is also not especially endearing.

― Bashment Jakes (Enrique), Wednesday, 23 August 2006 08:28 (seventeen years ago) link

The video on her You Tube channel is nice.

― rchinn (rchinn), Wednesday, 23 August 2006 21:45 (seventeen years ago) link

There are a few good songs on "Paris", I like it more than "Back To Basics". Xtina is clearly a better singer, but nobody has written a decent song for her so far (or I just fuckin' hate R&B), so I go for Paris, but neither of the two albums will be in my top 20 at the end of the year, that's for sure.
Moreover, some of the songs are good, not the "beating, yearning heart" of it.

― zeus (zeus), Wednesday, 23 August 2006 22:26 (seventeen years ago) link

If any other name was attached to "Stars are Blind" it would get zero airplay, that's for sure.

― darin (darin), Wednesday, 23 August 2006 22:42 (seventeen years ago) link

"Stars Are Blind" is a bland song sung poorly; there is nothing there for me to latch onto. I don't really have any interest in hearing the album (and I was kind of amazed you guys generated 170+ posts on it until I clicked on the thread, ha).

― Jesus Dan (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 23 August 2006 23:08 (seventeen years ago) link

the whole fucking album is bland. The only way the album is tolerable is if you lower your expectations to the floor, so that you can then be surprised when she doesn't step on her dick with every track.

But it's way easier to be cynical and notice that everything about her vocal work is completely undistinguishable. She hired a hitmaker so she sounds like the rest of Storch's resume. B.F.D. I hear crap like this and kneel down at the altar of rockism with complete confidence.

― don weiner (don weiner), Wednesday, 23 August 2006 23:51 (seventeen years ago) link

have you noticed that the review of her album on stylus has disappeared ? weird... any explanation for that, huh ?
(I must confess I haven't bought it yet...)

― AleXTC (AleXTC), Thursday, 24 August 2006 09:02 (seventeen years ago) link

TS: 'Stars Are Blind' vs No Doubt's 'Underneath It All'

― Konal Doddz (blueski), Thursday, 24 August 2006 09:13 (seventeen years ago) link

No Doubt in a landslide! Mentalist.

― Jesus Dan (Dan Perry), Thursday, 24 August 2006 10:09 (seventeen years ago) link

I thought it was a good song to bring up/compare with 'Stars Are Blind' at this point, cos I had this inkling that 'Underneath It All' was more popular at it's time even tho it shares qualities with 'Stars Are Blind' (cod-reggae, sung by blonde girl with a voice that really pisses some people off if perhaps not actually 'bland'). It probably is better, but not by that much imo.

― Konal Doddz (blueski), Thursday, 24 August 2006 10:27 (seventeen years ago) link

If any other name was attached to "Stars are Blind" it would get zero airplay, that's for sure.

but the point is that it IS paris hilton. it's a pop song so the person matters as much as the song itself!

― Nathalie (stevie nixed), Thursday, 24 August 2006 10:45 (seventeen years ago) link

It's also totally not what people really expected her single to sound like (well I didn't at least). Whether that indicates that it would've got played regardless of what it had sounded like or whether it's getting played despite defying expectations somewhat I'm not sure.

― Konal Doddz (blueski), Thursday, 24 August 2006 10:47 (seventeen years ago) link

"If any other name was attached to "Stars are Blind" it would get zero airplay, that's for sure."
but the point is that it IS paris hilton. it's a pop song so the person matters as much as the song itself!

-- Nathalie (stevi...), August 24th, 2006.

well yes. and it's paris hilton. so the hateful non-singing minor celebrity matters almost as much as the unobjectionable-but-hardly-outstanding lite-reggae track. fan-bloody-tastic.

― Bashment Jakes (Enrique), Thursday, 24 August 2006 10:52 (seventeen years ago) link

If any other name was attached to "Stars are Blind" it would get zero airplay, that's for sure.

well similar songs got airplay when the name No Doubt was attached to them!

so the hateful non-singing minor celebrity

why is she hateful? i don't understand why paris hilton provokes so much ire compared with, oh, any other given popstar/entertainment sleb who get, if not admired, then not reviled.

― The Lex (The Lex), Thursday, 24 August 2006 10:55 (seventeen years ago) link

"Stars Are Blind" is good but "Underneath It All" is much better - for Lady Saw alone!

― Tim Finney (Tim Finney), Thursday, 24 August 2006 10:59 (seventeen years ago) link

she is famous for being very rich, giving someone a blowjob, and despising poor people. if this doesn't condemn her in your view, neither does it mean that there's any reason to admire her.

xpost

― Bashment Jakes (Enrique), Thursday, 24 August 2006 11:01 (seventeen years ago) link

You missed out the racism, and reneging on a promise to do a charity event for starving children because "I haven't got enough time".

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Thursday, 24 August 2006 11:03 (seventeen years ago) link

being rich and giving blowjobs are fine by me! i do the latter and would like to be the former.

despising poor people - i refer you to paris's own quote upthread re "the real me"

― The Lex (The Lex), Thursday, 24 August 2006 11:05 (seventeen years ago) link

You went to private school, you already are "rich".

There's also a private school/blowjob gag here but I can't be bothered to make it.

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Thursday, 24 August 2006 11:06 (seventeen years ago) link

here is a sensible person:

http://observer.guardian.co.uk/comment/story/0,6903,1572890,00.html

― Bashment Jakes (Enrique), Thursday, 24 August 2006 11:06 (seventeen years ago) link

Er Lex I don't think she can explain despising poor people as being part of her media mask.

― Tim Finney (Tim Finney), Thursday, 24 August 2006 11:07 (seventeen years ago) link

Jawbreaker “Fireman”

― Raymond Cummings (Raymond Cummings), Thursday, 24 August 2006 11:07 (seventeen years ago) link

lex she is *famous for* those things, is the point. not for, you know, being talented or otherwise heroic.

― Bashment Jakes (Enrique), Thursday, 24 August 2006 11:07 (seventeen years ago) link

as for 'the real me' -- this is a very straightforward notion of identity from one of ilx's top contrarians.

― Bashment Jakes (Enrique), Thursday, 24 August 2006 11:08 (seventeen years ago) link

dom you really have a v reductive and inaccurate perspective on the uk class system for someone who spends most of their time going on and on ad nauseam about it

― The Lex (The Lex), Thursday, 24 August 2006 11:14 (seventeen years ago) link

and the whole issue of whether paris is a good or intelligent person is the biggest red herring ever given some of the other people who get ilm approval!

― The Lex (The Lex), Thursday, 24 August 2006 11:15 (seventeen years ago) link

Why argue the point that she's a good person then?

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Thursday, 24 August 2006 11:15 (seventeen years ago) link

um, i haven't.

― The Lex (The Lex), Thursday, 24 August 2006 11:18 (seventeen years ago) link

"Why is she hateful? Not that it matters, total red herring."

― Jesus Dan (Dan Perry), Thursday, 24 August 2006 11:22 (seventeen years ago) link

Seriously Lex, she's not going to fuck you or loan you anything. You can let go.

― Jesus Dan (Dan Perry), Thursday, 24 August 2006 11:23 (seventeen years ago) link

not hateful != likable

the things she does are no more morally dubious than what, i dunno, jessica simpson or mariah carey or j-lo or britney have been said to have done - so i don't understand why people who aren't repulsed by them are repulsed by paris. it doesn't mean any of them are nice AND I WOULDN'T WANT THEM TO BE

― The Lex (The Lex), Thursday, 24 August 2006 11:23 (seventeen years ago) link

Hahahahahaha!

"I don't see why people loathe her and they don't loathe (list of pop starlets that people often say they loathe)!"

― Jesus Dan (Dan Perry), Thursday, 24 August 2006 11:29 (seventeen years ago) link

right, everyone is being deliberately fucking obtuse on this thread and i don't have the time for it. i'm going to go and continue to laugh from afar at the more amusing plan b forum thread.

― The Lex (The Lex), Thursday, 24 August 2006 11:31 (seventeen years ago) link

(Speaking of which, what has Mariah done besides working herself into a coma and being crazy? I'm genuinely curious.)

― Jesus Dan (Dan Perry), Thursday, 24 August 2006 11:32 (seventeen years ago) link

I think Lex has a fetish for ridiculous female pop stars who make songs that he can against all the odds take seriously. The more you all insult Paris the more he will dig his heels in. I recognise this trait because myself and some of my IRL friends share it, to a certain extent.

I wonder if Lex is pooh-poohing Britney because she has been partially rehabilitated ("you know, "Toxic" is a really great song!).

Dan, Mariah didn't do stairs.

― Tim Finney (Tim Finney), Thursday, 24 August 2006 11:37 (seventeen years ago) link

It's also totally not what people really expected her single to sound like

I think this is an important point - when those false-leaks were going around there seemed to be a lot of excitement over that Sweetbox song, "human sacrifice", which is strong/brash/angry (vulgar?), one set of paris-attributes; instead we ended up with this insipid, sweet, languid thing, which also fits the 'paris' image but from a completely different direction.

― stop moving. (cis), Thursday, 24 August 2006 11:54 (seventeen years ago) link

it's true that lex's review crashed the lollercopter right into the heart of plan b's idiot forums.

― Bashment Jakes (Enrique), Thursday, 24 August 2006 12:09 (seventeen years ago) link

apparently the video has been banned in India.

― Konal Doddz (blueski), Thursday, 24 August 2006 13:11 (seventeen years ago) link

rockists.

― Bashment Jakes (Enrique), Thursday, 24 August 2006 13:14 (seventeen years ago) link

Racists, morelike.

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Thursday, 24 August 2006 13:14 (seventeen years ago) link

The wretchedness of the Plan B forum makes me want to go back in time and become a school bully

― DJ Mencap (DJ Mencap), Thursday, 24 August 2006 13:57 (seventeen years ago) link

i've written for it and everything but what do you expect? it's the indie-est zine out there!

― Bashment Jakes (Enrique), Thursday, 24 August 2006 13:59 (seventeen years ago) link

The wretchedness of the Plan B forum makes me want to go back in time and become a school bully

haha otm.

what i find sad is that plan b didn't have to be so indie, and it never set out to be (ffs KELIS was the planned cover star for issue 1, and only got pulled because she doesn't do photoshoots), but bejesus the demographic it appeals to now is beyond words.

― The Lex (The Lex), Thursday, 24 August 2006 14:02 (seventeen years ago) link

the forum is quite something. next time someone complains about strawman arguments here they should take a peek -- people who really say things like "i hate rap music, except for 'hey ya!'".

― Bashment Jakes (Enrique), Thursday, 24 August 2006 14:06 (seventeen years ago) link

ages and ages ago there was a thread on estelle, and some of the responses were ACTUALLY "urgh i can't stand those rappers who don't speak properly"!!!

― The Lex (The Lex), Thursday, 24 August 2006 14:10 (seventeen years ago) link

but Eamon DID suck!

― Konal Doddz (blueski), Thursday, 24 August 2006 14:27 (seventeen years ago) link

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PARIS HILTON - PARIS