Dave Matthews Band : Name Your Reasons Why They Are So Bad & Hated.

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It's officially 1200 posts. Nas and Jay-Z...we're coming after YOU.

Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 22:03 (twenty years ago) link


RIP- Jack Nance.

this thread should just turn into a giant Jack Nance memorium, where we post quotes from all the lynch films he was in.

"she's dead. wrapped in plastic."

or just continue with the Dune references as they seem to pass overtop the heads of most. even the most ardent frat-geek-boy can't muster that kinda devotion...

gawd bless this thread. it keeps my hope alive...

eedd, Wednesday, 23 July 2003 22:19 (twenty years ago) link

We STILL haven't found the secret of life. We pray and we meditate and suck down huge quantities of sapphu juice and melange pellets...and we're just not making any headway.
Maybe Dave Matthews himself will appear -- Jesus-like -- and utter golden syllables of cosmische truth and we will all be enlightened...

...oh...wait, I'm sorry...I'm trying to type this with a straight face and it just...BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 22:24 (twenty years ago) link

(side question: Exactly how many posts ARE in the Nas vs Jay-Z threads?)

Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 22:26 (twenty years ago) link

say, how many of the lady ILM readers out there are sexually attracted to Brad Dourif for all the weirdo/psycho characters that he plays?

Kingfish (Kingfish), Thursday, 24 July 2003 00:22 (twenty years ago) link

I'm amazed. Nobody in continental Europe (where I'm from) listens to Dave Matthews Band. I only know them very little from a feature on British MTV. There, they seemed pretty dull and harmless, and with a certain Patrick Bateman appeal (see: Genesis, Whitney Houston, Huey Lewis & The News). What's all the fuss about? Isn't DMB just plain ol' boring?

Jay K (Jay K), Thursday, 24 July 2003 00:39 (twenty years ago) link

Ah, fuck off.

Allison (Allison), Thursday, 24 July 2003 00:48 (twenty years ago) link

No Doubt Y'All Redneck Hataz Would Prefer This
Too many rednecks on this forum. DMB have fans of all color,creed,class etc. Can't believe some of you all went on about how black people don't like DMB. How many black people like your beloved sonic youths and killing jokes? Not even a point worth considering is it? So why say it about DMB.
Dave Rocks!

Helena, Thursday, 24 July 2003 03:17 (twenty years ago) link

You can't rock if you're called Dave. Unless you're a DJ. Daves that are non-DJs do not rock, almost by definition. Do Colins rock? No. No way can a Colin rock. Neither can a Dave.

colin s barrow (colin s barrow), Thursday, 24 July 2003 03:28 (twenty years ago) link

"What you talkin' 'bout, colin?"
http://www.driko.org/smallpics/davidleeroth.jpg

oops (Oops), Thursday, 24 July 2003 04:07 (twenty years ago) link

I would rebut Helena's assertion, but I suspect that all these DMB fans who jump in, post once and never post again would never read my brilliant rebuttal.

Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Thursday, 24 July 2003 11:03 (twenty years ago) link

Helena completely undercut her point by linking to something that looks really, really cool in theory.

Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Thursday, 24 July 2003 11:40 (twenty years ago) link

Go for it Lord Custos.

Helena, Thursday, 24 July 2003 13:25 (twenty years ago) link

Okay, I'm back.
First: let's break down your post one clause at a time.

Too many rednecks on this forum.
You have obviously NOT been reading the forum. It's mostly indie kid fans and undie rapper fans. In fact, Redneckness is probably more common in the DMB camp then here.
Also, this is an ad hominem attack. Instead of rebutting the other posters, you instead say nasty things about the posters themselves Granted, the ILM'ers have been doing more of their fair share of that as well.

DMB have fans of all color,creed,class etc.
Of all the DMB fan *I've* ever met, have been ex-Deadhead white guys and...oh...rednecks (one dude -- who drives a truck by the way -- only has three tapes: Crash by DMB, Come on Over by Shania Twain, and greatest hits of Randy Travis. Why only three? He threw out his Dixie Chicks tape.)
I have yet to meet any black people who can stomach DMB.
(Contrary to points mentioned very very early in the thread: I haven't met any bankers or insurance men who like DMB either. They all seem to be into John Tesh or John Coltrane.)

Can't believe some of you all went on about how black people don't like DMB. How many black people like your beloved sonic youths and killing jokes?
I know a girl named VeShawn who only likes Metallica and Megadeth. Does that come close?

Dave Rocks!
you forgot to say "and u r all gay!"

Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Thursday, 24 July 2003 14:33 (twenty years ago) link

How many black people like your beloved sonic youths and killing jokes?

Not that it matters in the slightest, but I know more black folks who like Killing Joke than I do who would ever stoop to the level of listening to DMB.

Alex in NYC (vassifer), Thursday, 24 July 2003 14:44 (twenty years ago) link

Yaaaaay! Alex is BACK!
But I don't see how anyone can be more of a KJ fan than Alex...unless they are all still in iceland wearing their tinfoil hats and praying that the end of the world will be quick and painless.

Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Thursday, 24 July 2003 14:54 (twenty years ago) link

Why only three? He threw out his Dixie Chicks tape.

good set-up, fine delivery.

Kingfish (Kingfish), Thursday, 24 July 2003 14:54 (twenty years ago) link

I thought ILM was pop!

Curt1s St3ph3ns, Thursday, 24 July 2003 14:59 (twenty years ago) link

So, Helena...whats your rebuttal to my rebuttal?

Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Thursday, 24 July 2003 14:59 (twenty years ago) link

I thought ILM was pop!
Nope. Haven't ya heard? We're all a bunch of autosodomizing, t'bacca-chewin' redrecks, now.

Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Thursday, 24 July 2003 15:00 (twenty years ago) link

yeah, Helena, where ARE your rebuttals? Put 'em on the glass, as they say around here.

Kingfish (Kingfish), Thursday, 24 July 2003 15:01 (twenty years ago) link

I'm not actually back. I'm sitting in an overly air-conditioned public library in Quogue on Long Island. The wife and I came out here for a week of sun, but it's been relentlessly rainy, alas.

Alex in NYC (vassifer), Thursday, 24 July 2003 15:19 (twenty years ago) link

fuck every single person in here that talks shit about dave. every dmb lover can tell you how talented and incredible dmb is. but for all you idiots that have NOOOOOOOOOOOo idea and talk bad need to sit down with a dave album and just listen. listen to the words, listen to the music, listen to everything. and until you actually listen go fuck yourselves. dave rocks

drew s, Friday, 25 July 2003 13:09 (twenty years ago) link

Yay!

J (Jay), Friday, 25 July 2003 13:23 (twenty years ago) link

...and we are all gay.

yes, yes, we KNOW this.

also, looks like this thread will never die. Looks like it's time to start referencing other pop culture, since we've had our run of _Dune_.

What icon of Western Civilization shall we make jokes about today?

Kingfish (Kingfish), Friday, 25 July 2003 13:25 (twenty years ago) link

Drew. WE *HAVE* LISTENED. We Have NO CHOICE. He's on the RADIO...ALL...THE...TIME...!
We couldn't AVOID listening to him if we tried!

Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Friday, 25 July 2003 13:25 (twenty years ago) link

So - we're still waiting on a DMB fuckwit fan to give us an example of a good song. Just one fucking song!? Or is it his haircut that you love?

dave225 (Dave225), Friday, 25 July 2003 13:26 (twenty years ago) link

So where's you rational rebuttal to that, eh, Drew?

Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Friday, 25 July 2003 13:26 (twenty years ago) link

Jerry Springer is running for the U.S. Senate.

J (Jay), Friday, 25 July 2003 13:32 (twenty years ago) link

ODB will kick his ass.

Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Friday, 25 July 2003 13:34 (twenty years ago) link

i'm disappointed by the DMB crew's constant refusal to put them rebuttals on the glass.

Kingfish (Kingfish), Friday, 25 July 2003 13:37 (twenty years ago) link

They are Guerilla Trolls. They jump in, call us all idiots. Demand we listen to the nitwits dull and irritating music (like we could frigging avoid it), and then don't bother posting again.

Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Friday, 25 July 2003 13:42 (twenty years ago) link

Oh, except for Helena. (And she still hasn't rebutted by rebuttal.

Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Friday, 25 July 2003 13:45 (twenty years ago) link

Rebutting would only be a waste of time. It's imposible to prove any point here since everyone has already formed a bad opinion of the band and are obviously not willing to alter that opinion.

Song that captures the overall DMBness of DMB = So much to say.

Allison (Allison), Friday, 25 July 2003 13:56 (twenty years ago) link

Allison has proved her worth repeatedly, so in deference to her opinion I will listen to "So Much to Say" and try to glean some wisdom therefrom. If the meaning of life appears I'll let y'all know!

I was hoping Helena would show back up too. :-(

J (Jay), Friday, 25 July 2003 13:59 (twenty years ago) link

wait, that wasn't a radio single, was it?

Kingfish (Kingfish), Friday, 25 July 2003 14:00 (twenty years ago) link

I don't believe so...might have been.

Allison (Allison), Friday, 25 July 2003 14:04 (twenty years ago) link

To rebut:
"Rebutting would only be a waste of time. It's imposible to prove any point here since every DMB fan has already formed a positive assessment of the band and are obviously not willing to alter that opinion."
And as Mark Twain once aptly opined: "Any long standing debate -- or thread over 1200 posts long -- means both sides are wrong."

Since neither side will give ground, maybe would should
1) both admit defeat and turn this thread back into a random assortment of movie quotes. or
2) nope. there is no choice #2. Goto 1

Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Friday, 25 July 2003 14:08 (twenty years ago) link

http://www.osric.com/~jeremy/bizarro.jpg

http://www.osric.com/~jeremy/glitch.jpg
I still say that this thread is a glitch in the matrix, and it's a lot like participating in the Special Olympics.

Kingfish (Kingfish), Friday, 25 July 2003 14:11 (twenty years ago) link

Now..was that really necessary?

Allison (Allison), Friday, 25 July 2003 14:16 (twenty years ago) link

I could only afford the 30 second clips on the Amazon website .. but .. Dave's music *is* toe-tapable .. but I get this Phil Collins vibe off of it - maybe a little funkier, but still, there it is. I think what really bugs me are the smooth-jazz basslines. ANyway, I think I liked Too Much more than the other songs - although I still can't get away from the association with drinking a $5.00 Budweiser at a free outdoor festival kinda sound.

But thanks for the recommendation, Allison.

dave225 (Dave225), Friday, 25 July 2003 14:17 (twenty years ago) link

The way I see it, Allison is caught between our snarkiness and the fact that practically none of the other fans who have posted here have any sense of perspective.

Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 25 July 2003 14:27 (twenty years ago) link

Alright - after further anesthetizing my sensibilities, I can accept the 30-second clip of "Don't Drink the Water" as passable. (That's probably the song that true DMB fans hate, isn't it....)

dave225 (Dave225), Friday, 25 July 2003 14:30 (twenty years ago) link

snarkiness keeps me entertained at work, at least.

and that makes it all worthwhile.

Kingfish (Kingfish), Friday, 25 July 2003 14:33 (twenty years ago) link

Actually it's one of my favorites. It's only 30 seconds though, you didn't get to hear the part where he freaks out and goes into a trance-like state.

Allison (Allison), Friday, 25 July 2003 14:39 (twenty years ago) link

Dave Matthews is on the local alt-rock morning show right now, previewing songs from his new "solo album." He's kind of funny, in a pleased-with-himself way. The songs are atmospheric but dull. I think I like them better than the songs (I've heard) with the "B."

Sam J. (samjeff), Friday, 25 July 2003 15:17 (twenty years ago) link

i can't stand that don't drink the water song. it was funny at first but now it's just damned silly.

Felcher (Felcher), Friday, 25 July 2003 15:26 (twenty years ago) link

Funny? I guess I didn't listen very carefully. (Actually, i didn't listen to the words at all.) I just thought that musically it was more interesting than what else I've heard.

dave225 (Dave225), Friday, 25 July 2003 15:49 (twenty years ago) link

Christ, I remember looking in on this thread in its infancy, the very day it was birthed.
And look, it's gotten so big.
I just spent two hours reading this thread, and I have to admit, it was fan-freakin'-tastic.
It had everything — drama, conflict, comedy, tragedy, mysterious strangers, and if I read between the lines correctly, maybe even a little romance.
Thank you to all the posters for such an entertaining read — from the ILM regulars, who didn't disappoint, to the DMB legions who rushed to their idol's defence.
This thread is pure gold.
Somebody should allow some magazine to serialize this. Or ILM could sell the movie rights.
Oh, and Dave Matthews rox Uruguay.

Bruce Urquhart (Bruce Urquhart), Friday, 25 July 2003 22:35 (twenty years ago) link

Would Careless Talk Costs Lives be improved if they ran a cover story on Dave Matthews Band? Everett True should interview Dave Matthews.
ET could be responsible for inflic....launching the genius of DMB in the UK. (Getting him away from us all in the states for a while)

Allannah, Friday, 25 July 2003 23:20 (twenty years ago) link


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