pitchfork is dumb (#34985859340293849494 in a series.)

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Seriously, it's like pretending like you're about to punch someone in the face and then getting mad when their first reflex is to punch you in the face for real.

-- Alex in Baltimore, Friday, 16 November 2007 20:28 (4 weeks ago) Link

It is more like yelling, in your worst French accent, "Ah m goiiin too pawnch zhoo in theh fehce (frog laugh)" with one eye closed while dangling a baguette delicately between two fingers like a distasteful pornographic magazine discovered during an unscheduled room cleaning by your disapproving Belgian mother and then being forced to write every victim of violence in the entire world ever (even those made into kidney pie maggot-styley) explaining that a consciousness-raising committee had been formed to ban people like yourself from ever talking in silly voices about silly things again.

that is what the pitchforkmediadotcom.com situation is like.
what do I know, though?? I am just a PASSIVE OBSERVER.

Jeff!, Friday, 14 December 2007 10:30 (sixteen years ago) link

No, threatening a lawsuit and assuming everybody's gonna know you were just a-funnin' because, hey, the way you phrased things was totally funny - that doesn't really compare to telegraphing your intentions via ridiculous accent and costume.

J0hn D., Friday, 14 December 2007 10:47 (sixteen years ago) link

three weeks pass...

webdev lulz.

fukasaku tollbooth, Monday, 7 January 2008 13:14 (sixteen years ago) link

Seems more intelligent and thought out than usual. What gives?

King Boy Pato, Monday, 7 January 2008 13:15 (sixteen years ago) link

the email to pitchfork is confounding not because it touches on "serious", unfuckwithable issues but because it's simply unfunny and pointless.

Charlie Howard, Monday, 7 January 2008 14:21 (sixteen years ago) link

wouldn't this http://www.pitchforkmediadotcom.com/index6.htm get him off due to fair use laws regarding parody? or is the url too intentionally misleading?

kiss out the jams, Tuesday, 8 January 2008 07:20 (sixteen years ago) link

also, I laughed at "beanbag chair chorizo"

kiss out the jams, Tuesday, 8 January 2008 07:22 (sixteen years ago) link

<i>No, threatening a lawsuit and assuming everybody's gonna know you were just a-funnin' because, hey, the way you phrased things was totally funny - that doesn't really compare to telegraphing your intentions via ridiculous accent and costume.

-- J0hn D., Friday, 14 December 2007 10:47 (4 weeks ago) Link</i>
Well John, at least you find me totally funny! :-)

Jeff!, Friday, 11 January 2008 00:13 (sixteen years ago) link

yay a famous person likes meeee

Just got offed, Friday, 11 January 2008 00:20 (sixteen years ago) link

two months pass...

^^ ahaha !

Charlie Howard, Wednesday, 26 March 2008 12:57 (sixteen years ago) link

Two of the questions from Pfork's interview of Colin Greenwood, bassist for Radiohead:

Pitchfork: The Pitchfork review of In Rainbows suggested "Radiohead have grown tired of trying to outrun themselves." What do you think of that assessment?

Pitchfork: The Pitchfork review of Hail to the Thief put forth the idea that "anything Radiohead does from here on out will sound like Radiohead"...

stephen, Friday, 28 March 2008 14:21 (sixteen years ago) link

"For personal questions, please press 2. For favourite Torchwood character, please press 3."

Dingbod Kesterson, Friday, 28 March 2008 14:24 (sixteen years ago) link

I would wager most of the people who posted in this thread in 2002 and 2003 have gone on to write for the site.

cee-oh-tee-tee, Friday, 28 March 2008 17:11 (sixteen years ago) link

I think the only one who has "gone on to" write for the site is Jess. Raposa, Dare, and Leone were already on staff at the time. I mean, unless mr. sparkle is a pseudonym for Tom Breihan or something.

jaymc, Friday, 28 March 2008 17:27 (sixteen years ago) link

who was dare

J0rdan S., Friday, 28 March 2008 17:27 (sixteen years ago) link

Christopher "Double" Dare

Alex in Baltimore, Friday, 28 March 2008 17:28 (sixteen years ago) link

mr. sparkle = Ray Suzuki

David R., Friday, 28 March 2008 17:31 (sixteen years ago) link

mad lolz @ ljag

BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Friday, 28 March 2008 17:46 (sixteen years ago) link

xpost: mr. sparkle = http://www.liquidmatrix.org/blog/wp-content/uploads/2007/09/mrsparkleorig.jpg

stephen, Friday, 28 March 2008 17:47 (sixteen years ago) link

i posted to ilx before i wrote for pfork, pplz

and what, Friday, 28 March 2008 18:31 (sixteen years ago) link

the mobb deep quote fits like a high-top fade, but will it make up any of the cred i'll lose forthis??? let's fucking hope so!

-- ethan, Thursday, September 13, 2001 8:00 PM (6 years ago) Bookmark Link

trifnan delong

and what, Friday, 28 March 2008 18:32 (sixteen years ago) link

there practically isn't any Pitchfork writer on ILX who didn't post here before writing for them, except for a couple PF lifers like Rich@rdson and, well, me.

Alex in Baltimore, Friday, 28 March 2008 18:36 (sixteen years ago) link

and i don't really count cause i was there for all of 3 months.

Alex in Baltimore, Friday, 28 March 2008 18:37 (sixteen years ago) link

yeah i mean i started in 01 but i was posting here in 2000

and what, Friday, 28 March 2008 18:37 (sixteen years ago) link

xp nice try, lifer

and what, Friday, 28 March 2008 18:37 (sixteen years ago) link

do we count ramosi here too?

and what, Friday, 28 March 2008 18:38 (sixteen years ago) link

two weeks pass...

Oh hey you guys, it's Jeff again. I figured since you all collectively have such a vested interest in my, uh... COMEDY I would let you know that I'm working on a new cartoon series called Starving Muppet Babies.

Oh and here's a direct link to the most recent episode.

More to the topic, what's w/ the grade inflation lately??? So much BNM, not enough monkey urine.

Jeff!, Wednesday, 16 April 2008 00:16 (sixteen years ago) link

one month passes...

FFS, Cohen, get over yourself: The Cinematic Orchestra Live at the Royal Albert Hall "review"

dblcheeksneek, Thursday, 29 May 2008 22:08 (fifteen years ago) link

why do you guys bother reviewing albums by your own writers if every single one gets b/w 7.5-7.7

J0rdan S., Thursday, 29 May 2008 22:11 (fifteen years ago) link

it's kinda played out but i still fuck with every day.

Jordan, Thursday, 29 May 2008 22:19 (fifteen years ago) link

What is song Ma Fleur?

Raw Patrick, Thursday, 29 May 2008 22:29 (fifteen years ago) link

pitchforks say oneida in north carolina the 21st

http://www.pitchforkmedia.com/article/news/50720-oneida-turn-iweddingi-lp-into-live-spectacle-tour

terrastock says oneida's at the fest the 21st

http://www.terrascope.co.uk/Terrastock7/Terrastock7_performers.htm

what is wrong, pitchforks?

kamerad, Thursday, 29 May 2008 23:32 (fifteen years ago) link

today's two main reviews:

Bun B - II Trill - Rating: 7.7 -------------------- Recommended

Steinski - What Does It All Mean? - Rating: 8.7 ----- Not Recommended

...
..
.

????????????!??!?!?!?!!

stephen, Friday, 30 May 2008 17:39 (fifteen years ago) link

If the Recommended or Best New Music tags were STRICTLY a function of the ratings, there wouldn't be any reason to have them.

nabisco, Friday, 30 May 2008 17:47 (fifteen years ago) link

It does say Terrastock on the 21st...of June. Winston-Salem, N.C. is the 21st of August.

Nabisco's right, but in addition to that compilations/archive releases/reissues of older material, etc., don't get those tags. (The other one being "Best New Music" and all.) There have been a few exceptions for collections of recent-ish 7"/12"-type material that most readers wouldn't have been previously familiar with (this was really stretched for the Braxe comp) but that Steinski is a collection of material from the past three decades, so...

scottpl, Friday, 30 May 2008 17:55 (fifteen years ago) link

good point Scott (i realized it was a comp. after i actually read the review, duhhh)

stephen, Friday, 30 May 2008 18:07 (fifteen years ago) link

why does pitchfork writers never want to bob their heads to trip hop?

rockapads, Friday, 30 May 2008 18:36 (fifteen years ago) link

i would like to see a 5.8 rated album get a "Recommended"

matinee, Friday, 30 May 2008 18:58 (fifteen years ago) link

why do you guys bother reviewing albums by your own writers if every single one gets b/w 7.5-7.7

Ta-da.

jaymc, Wednesday, 4 June 2008 17:36 (fifteen years ago) link

why do you guys bother reviewing albums by your own writers if every single one gets b/w 7.5-7.7

http://www.pitchforkmedia.com/article/record_review/50523-supreme-balloon

poortheatre, Wednesday, 4 June 2008 17:49 (fifteen years ago) link

what did rollie pemberton get

deej, Wednesday, 4 June 2008 17:52 (fifteen years ago) link

I like Festival.

Hurting 2, Wednesday, 4 June 2008 17:54 (fifteen years ago) link

Not sure if it belongs in this thread (could be classic or dud)... it's known that music journalists often don't listen to records enough to make a true judgment, if at all (see: Black Crowes/Maxim)... but I rather like this admission from Scottpl. in his Pfork review of the new Radiohead best of:

The packaging is merely a few promo photos and a long essay I didn't read (sorry).

C/D?

stephen, Thursday, 5 June 2008 15:34 (fifteen years ago) link

nonfamous local chicago bands almost always ratings between like 6 and 8 also, guessing they don't want to offend

n/a, Thursday, 5 June 2008 16:56 (fifteen years ago) link

two weeks pass...

from the Notwist review today:

Acher provides a candid glimpse into a troubled marriage by describing it in terms of the material goods used to prop it up-- "I remember good lies/ When we carried them home with us/ To our bedside tables and the coffee sets"-- thereby keenly drawing parallels between dysfunctional relationships and the IKEA-furnished apartments that house them: the cool surface appearances barely concealing the soul-deadening sterility.

stephen, Thursday, 19 June 2008 20:31 (fifteen years ago) link

Yeah, the SQUARES are all, like, ROBOTS, man!1!!

Bodrick III, Thursday, 19 June 2008 20:54 (fifteen years ago) link


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