Saturday Night Live

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i would watch pregnant amy poehler do anything

v v cute btw

Buffcoat and Beaver or Beaver and something else (jeff), Monday, 20 October 2008 17:15 (5 years ago) Permalink

I thought she and GOB didn't consummate the marriage?

jaymc, Monday, 20 October 2008 17:21 (5 years ago) Permalink

Rap was kinda cringe-worthy, but I will always laugh at McGruber and even a weak Jean K. Jean. (Would pay theater prices for a crappy Jean K. Jean movie.)

nabisco, Monday, 20 October 2008 17:21 (5 years ago) Permalink

the best was the appearance of tim calhoun, my favorite reoccurring character in recent history

metametadata (n/a), Monday, 20 October 2008 17:22 (5 years ago) Permalink

will forte is awesome

metametadata (n/a), Monday, 20 October 2008 17:22 (5 years ago) Permalink

Also the Poehler "I'm No Angel" perfume ad was pretty A+

nabisco, Monday, 20 October 2008 17:24 (5 years ago) Permalink

that excerpt seems to presuppose that a) SNL should seek to materially detract from Palin, presumably because she's Palin

Yes, presumably Swift would not have had an "it's all fun n games" stance twd the biggest idiot ever to run for national office

Dr Morbius, Monday, 20 October 2008 17:28 (5 years ago) Permalink

I never knew Swift did booking.

nabisco, Monday, 20 October 2008 17:29 (5 years ago) Permalink

i just thought the moose was funny

akm, Monday, 20 October 2008 17:30 (5 years ago) Permalink

the part where Baldwin whispers in Fey's ear and she sez "Bye-ee" and hurries past Palin made me chuckle, but otherwise, pretty lame.

some penetrating commentary here, courtesy of those nitwits on "Fox & Friends" and that load Frank Luntz ("great observer of all things media"). howdare Baldwin et al. not show Palin the courtesy to read from the cards better! WTF?

yeah xpost perfume ad was lols

flyover statesman (will), Monday, 20 October 2008 17:32 (5 years ago) Permalink

Best thing to ever happen to the show was when they aired the first ever episode to honor George Carlin and not a single thing was funny - nothing, finally disproving the "it used to be good" cliche. I especially like it when people say "it used to be funny when Chris Rock, Adam Sandler, and Chris Farley were on it" because those were the lowest rated seasons ever.

I think it's been really really funny recently.

Also, Would pay theater prices for a crappy Jean K. Jean movie. = OTM.

Spencer Chow, Monday, 20 October 2008 17:32 (5 years ago) Permalink

especially white ppl rapping badly, which they LOVE.

When this started, I made like I had to go out for a smoke, but really I just couldn't take the bit. I hate it when they make me embarrassed on their behalf.

crusty but benign (kenan), Monday, 20 October 2008 17:33 (5 years ago) Permalink

you probably just watched it

conrad, Monday, 20 October 2008 17:34 (5 years ago) Permalink

I believe Swift was Jack Paar's personal ass't back in the '50s.

S Chow = Rex Reed Award-winning reverse barometer of comedy

Dr Morbius, Monday, 20 October 2008 17:35 (5 years ago) Permalink

Ha, I didn't know that Jean K. Jean and Tim Calhoun were recurring characters. Both of them were hilarious.

jaymc, Monday, 20 October 2008 17:36 (5 years ago) Permalink

What does it matter when I watched it? Sunday morning, if you're keeping score.

crusty but benign (kenan), Monday, 20 October 2008 17:37 (5 years ago) Permalink

yeah the first season of this show isn't funny at all now. the second and third only marginally better. I do think the eddie murphy years are still pretty great, and the season Lorne Michaels left, with chris guest, martin short, and billy crystal is still probably the funniest this show ever got. I think this current cast seems to have the best, non-ego centric chops of any cast since then (by which I mean they seem like good ensemble players and not people aiming for a career doing terrible movies).

akm, Monday, 20 October 2008 17:45 (5 years ago) Permalink

the show really is not funny now

and what, Monday, 20 October 2008 17:45 (5 years ago) Permalink

did you see any of the last five years of this show? compared to that it is a woody allen film

akm, Monday, 20 October 2008 17:47 (5 years ago) Permalink

Tim Calhoun is my alltime fave snl character and I was excited to see him again, but it was maybe the weakest entry in Tim Calhoun history.

dan selzer, Monday, 20 October 2008 17:52 (5 years ago) Permalink

That was the least funny of all the Jean K. Jeans thus far, too. (Possibly because they're running out of Euro references and can never live up to the Nutella joke.)

Challenging opinion: there is not nearly as much variation in the quality of SNL seasons as the arguing public would like to pretend.

nabisco, Monday, 20 October 2008 17:53 (5 years ago) Permalink

this season has been pretty good so far. the only thing that has especially bugged me is that going "lol crystal meth" has become their new default punchline -- the Phelps episode featured I believe 2 references to meth in the first 15 minutes, and then another one in the Weekend Update.

some dude, Monday, 20 October 2008 17:53 (5 years ago) Permalink

SNL is like the Tonight Show, or Today - it's a franchise in a non-prime time slot. Whether it is funny or not is beside the point to the network execs who keep it on the schedule. It will probably survive another 25 years because it is super cheap to produce - and what else are they going to put on at that time slot that could draw more viewers?

Aimless, Monday, 20 October 2008 17:53 (5 years ago) Permalink

Buffcoat and Beaver or Beaver and something else (jeff), Monday, 20 October 2008 17:54 (5 years ago) Permalink

calhoun is a recurring character from a while back (i think i remember forte doing him as one of his first parts when he was added to the show) but they use him sparingly

metametadata (n/a), Monday, 20 October 2008 17:54 (5 years ago) Permalink

The Guest/Crystal/Short/Shearer season was easily the funniest, but it was also very traditional and unzeitgeisty.

M.V., Monday, 20 October 2008 17:59 (5 years ago) Permalink

yeah but that makes it still funny, 25 years later

akm, Monday, 20 October 2008 18:00 (5 years ago) Permalink

Challenging opinion: there is not nearly as much variation in the quality of SNL seasons as the arguing public would like to pretend.

― nabisco, Monday, October 20, 2008 1:53 PM (18 seconds ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

i dunno, can you show me anything from the last 10 years or so that's as funny as norm macdonald weekend updates or frank gannon p.i. p.i. or the sly stone car accident bit or grayson moorhead securities or

Jay Mohr: Hey, look at this polar bear cage. Hey, you think I can swim the little moat both ways before the bear eats me?

Adam Sandler: Five bucks says you can't.

Jay Mohr: All right. Read 'em and weep, my friend!

[Mohr jumps the railing into the polar bear pit. He disappears from view and we hear a loud splash as he hits the water below.]

Norm MacDonald: "Read 'em and weep"? You say "Read 'em and weep" before you lay down your cards in poker, not before you jump into a polar bear cage.

Tim Meadows: Yeah, okay, Mr. Dictionary.

Norm MacDonald: "Mr. Dictionary"? How does knowing about poker make me "Mr. Dictionary"?

Tim Meadows: Ah, no, I wasn't talking to you.

and what, Monday, 20 October 2008 18:00 (5 years ago) Permalink

the norm macdonald weekend updates were some funny shit

akm, Monday, 20 October 2008 18:01 (5 years ago) Permalink

unfrozen caveman lawyer, who's more grizzled, sinatra group...

and what, Monday, 20 October 2008 18:02 (5 years ago) Permalink

I've loled more at this season than I have in a long time. Space Olympics, Wahlberg, etc. Plus I have a mega-crush on Casey Wilson.

jon /via/ chi 2.0, Monday, 20 October 2008 18:03 (5 years ago) Permalink

george f will's sports machine XD

and what, Monday, 20 October 2008 18:03 (5 years ago) Permalink

mike myers/heather locklear racist infomercial

and what, Monday, 20 October 2008 18:04 (5 years ago) Permalink

[ "Grayson Moorhead Securities. A Tradition of Excellence." ]

Narrator: On Wall Street, trendy investment fads have come and gone over the years, but not at Grayson Moorhead, where we've always stuck to the basic principles set forth by Arthur Grayson nearly 80 years ago.

Arthur Grayson: Our clients must be our first priority.

[ "The Tradition Endures" ]

We will take our client's money and invest it. Part of the profit we will keep for ourselves; the rest we will give to the client.

[ "A Tradition of Security" ]

We will make a list of our clients, and how much money each of them has given us to invest. We will keep this list in a safe place. If we have time, we will make a copy of the list, in case something happens to the first list.

[ "A Tradition of Listening" ]

Listen to your client. It's the only way to know what he's saying.

[ "A Tradition of Trust" ]

If a client is talking, and you're not listening, and he notices, and he accuses you of not listening, just say, "Sure, I've been listening, I've heard every word you've said." If he then says, "Alright, tell me what I've been talking about." Just say, "You've been talking about your investments. Which stocks to buy and so on." That way the client will think you've been listening, even though you haven't.

[ "A Tradition of Integrity" ]

We will invest only in white-owned businesses.

Narrator: Not all of Arthur Grayson's principles are followed today, but at Grayson Moorhead we still believe in the basics.

Arthur Grayson: Don't leave the client's money lying around. Keep it in a safe place. For example: where we keep the list.

and what, Monday, 20 October 2008 18:04 (5 years ago) Permalink

http://snltranscripts.jt.org/94/94bparadox.phtml

and what, Monday, 20 October 2008 18:06 (5 years ago) Permalink

ONE BIG DOOR

some dude, Monday, 20 October 2008 18:07 (5 years ago) Permalink

ONE BIG DOOR.

― some dude, Thursday, June 26, 2008 12:17 PM (3 months ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

some dude, Monday, 20 October 2008 18:07 (5 years ago) Permalink

I have no tolerance, gang, for anyone who commits arson.

and what, Monday, 20 October 2008 18:08 (5 years ago) Permalink

I was just looking at the transcript page for a 97 episode that featured a Goat Boy sketch, a cheerleader sketch, AND a Roxbury guys sketch. there really was a time when Norm was totally holding shit down by himself.

― some dude, Thursday, June 26, 2008 3:00 PM (3 months ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

and what, Monday, 20 October 2008 18:09 (5 years ago) Permalink

i will still ride for lazy sunday but yes white people rap lol is played whoooo

BIG HOOS was a communisteen orgadriver (BIG HOOS aka the steendriver), Monday, 20 October 2008 18:12 (5 years ago) Permalink

Natalie Portman's rap is classic too.

jon /via/ chi 2.0, Monday, 20 October 2008 18:12 (5 years ago) Permalink

Winston-McCauley Funeral Home

Winston-McCauley Spokesperson.....Phil Hartman

Spokesperson: Care, compassion, dedication. These are the things we can promise you at Winston-McCauley Funeral Home. And there's one other thing we can promise: that we will not have sex with any dead body. How can we guarantee this level of service? First, we rigorously test our applicants for aptitude and intelligence.. and also to make sure they don't have the urge to have sex with dead bodies. And, if any of our employees fails to live up to our standards, he can be suspended, without pay, for up to six months. And, if that's not enough, you have my personal assurance that if you can prove that your loved one was the victim of post-mortem sex, I will discount your bill with us for a full $1,000. That's the Winston-McCauley Guarantee.

Announcer: Care. Compassion. Dedication. And absolutely No Sex. Winston-McCauley Funeral Home.

velko, Monday, 20 October 2008 18:13 (5 years ago) Permalink

God, you kids were weaned on shit.

http://snltranscripts.jt.org/76/76imrmike.phtml

Dr Morbius, Monday, 20 October 2008 18:19 (5 years ago) Permalink

Predictable.

jaymc, Monday, 20 October 2008 18:24 (5 years ago) Permalink

http://snltranscripts.jt.org/91/91tgannon.phtml

and what, Monday, 20 October 2008 18:25 (5 years ago) Permalink

Jim Belushi was doing lol white people rap on SNL 23 years ago. Yikes.

Little Hussein (Pancakes Hackman), Monday, 20 October 2008 18:30 (5 years ago) Permalink

http://snltranscripts.jt.org/06/06ihiphop.phtml

I love this skit a little too much.

Pipe Wrench Fight (HI DERE), Monday, 20 October 2008 18:32 (5 years ago) Permalink

Natalie Portman's rap is classic too.

― jon /via/ chi 2.0, Monday, October 20, 2008 2:12 PM (18 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

take it to stuff white ppl like; that was like the most unfunny viral bullshit of the past several years as far as i'm concerned.

i will say the mark wahlberg talks to animals sketch was a) hilarious b) gave me a little more respect for andy samberg.

the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Monday, 20 October 2008 18:32 (5 years ago) Permalink

S Chow = Rex Reed Award-winning reverse barometer of comedy

Hmm, that's not very funny either.

Spencer Chow, Monday, 20 October 2008 18:35 (5 years ago) Permalink


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