Dave Matthews Band : Name Your Reasons Why They Are So Bad & Hated.

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It Didn't because Dave Matthews Band IS the meaning of life!

― The Resurrector, Tuesday, 22 July 2003 14:38 (twenty years ago) link

is that anything like the Water of Life?

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Tuesday, 22 July 2003 14:42 (twenty years ago) link

Paul: "Those who used DMB tried and failed?"
Rev Mother Mohiam: "They tried and died."

― Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Tuesday, 22 July 2003 14:45 (twenty years ago) link

"and how can this be? for Dave is the Kwisatz Haderach!"

http://mediaservice.photoisland.com/auction/Jul/20037222263406199904517.jpg

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Tuesday, 22 July 2003 14:56 (twenty years ago) link

http://mediaservice.photoisland.com/auction/Jul/20037222263406199904517.jpg

― Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Tuesday, 22 July 2003 14:59 (twenty years ago) link

thanks.

stupid photoisland. i need to remember that they only allow one link per page.

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Tuesday, 22 July 2003 15:02 (twenty years ago) link

fun fact: the kid who played Alia grew up into the tasty Alicia Witt, who was the little piano-playing sister in "Twin Peaks", and was the freaky ex-porn chick in "Cecil B. Demented"

http://www.bombsite.com/images/cecil1.jpg
"jingle balls, jingle balls..."

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Tuesday, 22 July 2003 15:13 (twenty years ago) link

(I like that Bekah exposed her inner nerdiness by trolling a web board. You go, girl!)

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 22 July 2003 15:28 (twenty years ago) link

i love you all. i thought i was the only one who loved that movie (and is now creeped out by how hot alicia witt is."

― Felcher (Felcher), Tuesday, 22 July 2003 15:55 (twenty years ago) link

Save this thread!

(This is Mark C, who never posts on ILM, volunteering for the ILXor army in the 100 Years of Dave Mattews War. I would be perfectly willing to lay my life down for the right to diss the least interesting, ambitious and vivacious music on the planet)

― Mark C (Mark C), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 08:41 (twenty years ago) link

You imbeciles are powerless against the the likes of us. I'm afraid your first mistake has already been made in underestimating our sizeable assemblage of hippies and frat boys. Surrender yourselves now to evade the extreme humilation and agony of your inevitable defeat.

― Allison (Allison), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 14:18 (twenty years ago) link

Chuuuuuuuuk-SAH!
(*the first regiment of frat boy jarheads explodes into bloody, greasy giblets*)

― Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 14:50 (twenty years ago) link

just like in Quake!

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 15:18 (twenty years ago) link

Surrender yourselves now to evade the extreme humilation and agony of your inevitable defeat.
We Fremen have a saying...
"God created DMB to test our patience."
One cannot go against the sick sense of humor of God.

...and his word shall carry death eternal
to those who stand against the righteous.

― Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 15:32 (twenty years ago) link

The RIGHTEOUS?!?!?!?!?!

― Felcher (Felcher), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 15:37 (twenty years ago) link

(I shall bend like a reed in the wind...)

― Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 15:39 (twenty years ago) link

well, the self-righteous, then.

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 15:40 (twenty years ago) link

Felcher is secretly Sting? Oh dear.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 15:42 (twenty years ago) link

Chuuuuuuuuk-SAH!
BLADOW!

― Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 15:45 (twenty years ago) link

DMB Fans all over the world dissapear in a splatter of gore.

― Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 15:47 (twenty years ago) link

(gasp)
...Custos no longer needs the Weirding Module...

― Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 15:47 (twenty years ago) link

DEeeeeeeeeeeeeeee-MMM'BEE! *BOOM*

"our name is now a killing word."

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 15:47 (twenty years ago) link

http://ddraven.tripod.com/dune/

― Felcher (Felcher), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 15:53 (twenty years ago) link

hee hee. that's a cute quiz.

in other news, i never knew that Jack Nance was in _Dune_ until i was mucking about on IMDB yesterday.

http://www.davidlynch.de/nancedune.jpg

"There...was a fish...IN the percolater, my Baron."

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 16:08 (twenty years ago) link

i love the colors in that picture

― Felcher (Felcher), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 16:09 (twenty years ago) link

You fools! Did you honestly think that I would compose my regiment solely of frat boys and hippies? My master plan shall soon come into effect, and your attempts to rid the world of DMB fans will be a miserable failure. Heed my warning, for your cruel endeavors will not go unpunished.

― Allison (Allison), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 16:26 (twenty years ago) link

looks like some freaky Wizard of Oz/emerald shit.

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 16:27 (twenty years ago) link

Foolish woman, our Jihad will Cleanse the Universe of ALL jam bands!

― Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 16:30 (twenty years ago) link

god forbid what the frat boys & hippies would do even they ever got their hands on the spice Melange...

http://members.rogers.com/darlenescreations/hippies.jpg
Give me spice! Drive them into utter submission. You must not show the slightest pity or mercy... as only you can... Never stop!

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 16:40 (twenty years ago) link

That CANNOT be a real photo. It HAS to be a holloween costume. Thats too friggin wretched for even the most acid-addled fule to wear.

― Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 16:49 (twenty years ago) link

Heed my warning, for your cruel endeavors will not go unpunished.
I.. I.. I've always been a big DMB fan... I mean, what's not to like? They're sweet, and they totally rock ... ! I never said nothin' bad about them. Help me out here, guys...

Wait - oh!
Foolish woman, our Jihad will Cleanse the Universe of ALL jam bands!
I hate DMB and all other jam bands. Buncha fucks. Screw 'em.

― dave225 (Dave225), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 16:49 (twenty years ago) link

Did someone just secretly use "the voice" on dave225?

― Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 16:59 (twenty years ago) link

Your inane comments will no longer be tolerated, Custos. You leave me no choice but to kill you. Unless we are stopped, the wrath of a thousand cronies shall soon penetrate and demolish your army.

― Allison (Allison), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 17:03 (twenty years ago) link

it's probably a pic of grown up frat types dressed up as hippies.

here's some real hippies

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 17:05 (twenty years ago) link

Your inane comments will no longer be tolerated, Custos.
Try and stop me.
...
Ha, couldn't do it. (*Blows loud raspberry*)
You leave me no choice but to kill you.
I've got my personal shield on. You can't get me.

(Note: wouldn't it be hilarious if we found out that Allison was really Tanya Headon in disguise. And DMB turns out to be the only music she doesn't hate!)

― Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 18:19 (twenty years ago) link

be careful! the slow blade penetrates!

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 18:28 (twenty years ago) link

Then Allison and I will join each other in death!

― Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 18:32 (twenty years ago) link

Wow...when you see that written down...that just looks sooooo "Amatuer Goth Poetry Slam Nite"

― Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 18:33 (twenty years ago) link

Y'know what. This is too many "Dune" references for just one thread.
Kingfish...I suspect This thread can get more ~~melange~~ mileage out of them.

― Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 18:37 (twenty years ago) link

i know. I just like the fact that when this thread is revived in 2004, it'll have all this random sub-stream-of-consciousness turns, with the occasional holdover in pop culture. Like Odysseus wandered thru the modern day pop culture landscape, never able to return home, but never bored, either.

and, in our version, Odysseus looks like the Kurt Russell character in "Big Trouble in Little Trouble", riding thru the night on the Pork Chop Express.

plus, i thought it'd be funny to somehow conflate DMB & Dune references. It's certainly been entertaining for the last day or so.

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 18:44 (twenty years ago) link

It's officially 1200 posts. Nas and Jay-Z...we're coming after YOU.

― Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 22:03 (twenty years ago) link

RIP- Jack Nance.

this thread should just turn into a giant Jack Nance memorium, where we post quotes from all the lynch films he was in.

"she's dead. wrapped in plastic."

or just continue with the Dune references as they seem to pass overtop the heads of most. even the most ardent frat-geek-boy can't muster that kinda devotion...

gawd bless this thread. it keeps my hope alive...

― eedd, Wednesday, 23 July 2003 22:19 (twenty years ago) link

We STILL haven't found the secret of life. We pray and we meditate and suck down huge quantities of sapphu juice and melange pellets...and we're just not making any headway.
Maybe Dave Matthews himself will appear -- Jesus-like -- and utter golden syllables of cosmische truth and we will all be enlightened...

...oh...wait, I'm sorry...I'm trying to type this with a straight face and it just...BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

― Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 22:24 (twenty years ago) link

(side question: Exactly how many posts ARE in the Nas vs Jay-Z threads?)

― Lord Custos Epsilon (Lord Custos Epsilon), Wednesday, 23 July 2003 22:26 (twenty years ago) link

say, how many of the lady ILM readers out there are sexually attracted to Brad Dourif for all the weirdo/psycho characters that he plays?

― Kingfish (Kingfish), Thursday, 24 July 2003 00:22 (twenty years ago) link

I'm amazed. Nobody in continental Europe (where I'm from) listens to Dave Matthews Band. I only know them very little from a feature on British MTV. There, they seemed pretty dull and harmless, and with a certain Patrick Bateman appeal (see: Genesis, Whitney Houston, Huey Lewis & The News). What's all the fuss about? Isn't DMB just plain ol' boring?

― Jay K (Jay K), Thursday, 24 July 2003 00:39 (twenty years ago) link

Ah, fuck off.

― Allison (Allison), Thursday, 24 July 2003 00:48 (twenty years ago) link

No Doubt Y'All Redneck Hataz Would Prefer This
Too many rednecks on this forum. DMB have fans of all color,creed,class etc. Can't believe some of you all went on about how black people don't like DMB. How many black people like your beloved sonic youths and killing jokes? Not even a point worth considering is it? So why say it about DMB.
Dave Rocks!

― Helena, Thursday, 24 July 2003 03:17 (twenty years ago) link

You can't rock if you're called Dave. Unless you're a DJ. Daves that are non-DJs do not rock, almost by definition. Do Colins rock? No. No way can a Colin rock. Neither can a Dave.

― colin s barrow (colin s barrow), Thursday, 24 July 2003 03:28 (twenty years ago) link

"What you talkin' 'bout, colin?"
http://www.driko.org/smallpics/davidleeroth.jpg

― oops (Oops), Thursday, 24 July 2003 04:07 (twenty years ago) link

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