ANNOUNCEMENT - CALL FOR PITCHES - MAX AND LAMP FILM PRODUCTION COMPANY LLC

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"black friday" - shoppers who show up at a midnight sale on black friday are terrorized by a serial killer who locks them in and dispatches with them one by one. gruesome death modes: bled to death from paper cuts made with cut-out coupons, crushed to death between shopping carts, etc. their only chance is a disgraced marine who only came to the sale to get his daughter the perfect xmas present, now he'll have to fight his way out if he wants to see her again.

congratulations (n/a), Friday, 27 November 2009 19:38 (fourteen years ago) link

see, i can actually see that one being made

itdn put butt in the display name (gbx), Friday, 27 November 2009 20:05 (fourteen years ago) link

haha thats really a pretty good movie idea imo

¨°º¤ø„¸¸„ø¤º°¨ (Lamp), Saturday, 28 November 2009 04:56 (fourteen years ago) link

only if marine gets played by steve buscemi imo

Louis Cll (darraghmac), Saturday, 28 November 2009 05:10 (fourteen years ago) link

shock reveal at end of movie = serial killer is sinbad reprising role from jingle all the way

EFIL4RAGGETT (los blue jeans), Saturday, 28 November 2009 06:12 (fourteen years ago) link

Working Title: Turtles, Turtles Everywhere!
Release Date: June 26, 2011

Sally May Jenkins (Jane Fonda) and Billy Joe Jenkins (Beau Bridges) are quirky Louisiana turtle farmers (and part-time grandparents!) who love only one thing more than spending time with their eccentric farm family in a colorful Cajun setting: raising and caring for thousands of turtles! But when their funky swamp life is threatened by evil Yankee developer Troy Burnheart (Bradley Cooper), can the Jenkins clan manage to rally the community to save the turtle farm, or will Burnheart and his cronies succeed in draining the swamp to build a shopping mall?

iiiijjjj, Sunday, 29 November 2009 18:23 (fourteen years ago) link

two months pass...

http://i.imgur.com/tPLC9.jpg

caek, Tuesday, 2 February 2010 14:16 (fourteen years ago) link

let's start casting now, i want to package this up in time for berlin

caek, Tuesday, 2 February 2010 14:16 (fourteen years ago) link

must be told from the perspective of the dog

not with v/o or anything but by only shooting what is immediately visible to the dog. then he trips balls and dies ;_;

avatar 2: the na'vi ending story (gbx), Tuesday, 2 February 2010 14:21 (fourteen years ago) link

http://i47.tinypic.com/2dmh5pw.jpg

ice cr?m, Tuesday, 2 February 2010 14:41 (fourteen years ago) link

and youll never believe what happens next...

ice cr?m, Tuesday, 2 February 2010 14:42 (fourteen years ago) link

I want to make an avatar movie except everybody is green instead of blue and at the end you find out that pandora...was actually earth all along

you want it to be some dude, but it's the other dude (dyao), Tuesday, 2 February 2010 14:47 (fourteen years ago) link

we are currently accepting ideas for our premiere movie--please post a 50-200 wd pitch to this thread for consideration. you should cast the movie with your dream actors--no guarantees we will be able to sign those actors

max, Tuesday, 2 February 2010 14:47 (fourteen years ago) link

pandora...was actually earth a burrito all along

ice cr?m, Tuesday, 2 February 2010 14:48 (fourteen years ago) link

after the revelation there will be a 15 minute long coda where a digitally resurrected jimmy stewart dresses the the earth up in different eco-costumes, getting closer and closer to the truth until the earth's conscience gets the better of her xxp

you want it to be some dude, but it's the other dude (dyao), Tuesday, 2 February 2010 14:48 (fourteen years ago) link

pandora...was actually earth a burrito all along

― ice cr?m, Tuesday, February 2, 2010 2:48 PM (29 seconds ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

exec producer credit right here.

caek, Tuesday, 2 February 2010 14:49 (fourteen years ago) link

unobtainium = guacamole

ice cr?m, Tuesday, 2 February 2010 14:52 (fourteen years ago) link

fuckin hell you would have them FLOCKING to the IMAX to see a burrito in 3D

genial anarchy (darraghmac), Tuesday, 2 February 2010 14:52 (fourteen years ago) link

3D!!

genial anarchy (darraghmac), Tuesday, 2 February 2010 14:52 (fourteen years ago) link

it will change cinema 4EVER

ice cr?m, Tuesday, 2 February 2010 14:56 (fourteen years ago) link

four-word pitch:

MICHAEL
SNOW
WAVELENGTH
3D

the highest per-vote vag so far (history mayne), Tuesday, 2 February 2010 14:57 (fourteen years ago) link

three months pass...

a time-travel thriller about evolved dinosaurs that disguise themselves as dog catchers

(latebloomer) (latebloomer), Thursday, 13 May 2010 23:53 (fourteen years ago) link

but instead of dogs they catch people

(latebloomer) (latebloomer), Thursday, 13 May 2010 23:53 (fourteen years ago) link

and force them to compete against each other in a secret arena on the moon.

(latebloomer) (latebloomer), Thursday, 13 May 2010 23:55 (fourteen years ago) link

love it

max, Friday, 14 May 2010 13:15 (fourteen years ago) link

cast it for me

max, Friday, 14 May 2010 13:20 (fourteen years ago) link

well get renny harlin to do it as his comeback

max, Friday, 14 May 2010 13:20 (fourteen years ago) link

sam jackson as nick fury

May be half naked, but knows a good headline when he sees it (darraghmac), Friday, 14 May 2010 13:33 (fourteen years ago) link

four months pass...

JAGGER DOES AMERICA

this would sort of be like a 'no reservations' style weekly tv series chronicling l0u1s jagg3r's first tour of america -- he would do 'things' and go to 'places' but the crux of the show & the hook that would keep viewers coming back would be his own writing & narration in classic jaggerian prose -- also there would be cooking interludes, like we would find him a kitchen and he would do like two or three quick dishes, recipes posted on our website

J0rdan S., Monday, 4 October 2010 21:49 (thirteen years ago) link

love it

max, Monday, 4 October 2010 22:20 (thirteen years ago) link

needs a sidekick

max, Monday, 4 October 2010 22:20 (thirteen years ago) link

that wd be me

frederick bunce esq, professional sidekick, Monday, 4 October 2010 22:24 (thirteen years ago) link

awes

journey to the end of nyt (nakhchivan), Monday, 4 October 2010 23:45 (thirteen years ago) link

aw nakh I thought you was gonna volunteer

acoleuthic, Monday, 4 October 2010 23:46 (thirteen years ago) link

pledge £10 to an ilx0r paypal fund for plane tix + digicam

as godard said, all you need to make a film is a girl and a gun a max and a jag

journey to the end of nyt (nakhchivan), Monday, 4 October 2010 23:51 (thirteen years ago) link

ignore this buffoon, I smoke a pipe and possess my own Super 8 camera

frederick bunce esq, professional sidekick, Tuesday, 5 October 2010 00:01 (thirteen years ago) link

no sidekick for lj

journey to the end of nyt (nakhchivan), Tuesday, 5 October 2010 00:13 (thirteen years ago) link

:(

btw nakh when are you and I gonna bro down over a tumbler of something lethal and a grand sporting occasion

acoleuthic, Tuesday, 5 October 2010 00:20 (thirteen years ago) link

hmmnph if i ever get freebies to a cricket match again i'll let u know but i imagine the irlj experience is probably too intense for delicate souls like yrs truly

journey to the end of nyt (nakhchivan), Tuesday, 5 October 2010 00:26 (thirteen years ago) link

haha

am generally pretty low-maintenance + coyly affable IRL and not terrifying (ppl are free to dispute this btw) - think on it dude, you seem A+ sound

acoleuthic, Tuesday, 5 October 2010 00:34 (thirteen years ago) link

i feel like coy is a thing you cannot call yourself. like, other people can observe that you're coy but if you call yourself coy it makes me wonder.

horseshoe, Tuesday, 5 October 2010 00:38 (thirteen years ago) link

not coy--"coyly affable"

max, Tuesday, 5 October 2010 00:39 (thirteen years ago) link

"affable, in a coy manner"

max, Tuesday, 5 October 2010 00:39 (thirteen years ago) link

i thought about that and i am not sure what it means frankly, but still

horseshoe, Tuesday, 5 October 2010 00:40 (thirteen years ago) link

it was a sort of deliberate oxymoron? idk. you're right.

acoleuthic, Tuesday, 5 October 2010 00:41 (thirteen years ago) link

LJ: COYLY AFFABLE S01E01 script

LJ sits crosslegged in front of the fly-ridden corpse of a coyote, clutching antique winchester rifle and staring unblinkingly into the camera for some 10 seconds w/ blood stripes under his eyes

INTERTITLE; THE IMPOSSIBILITY OF DEATH IN THE MIND OF SOMEONE LIVING

LJ: THIS is my story, and all thee who bear witness to it shall know my glory, for terra incognito is but an enticement to my kind [etc]

journey to the end of nyt (nakhchivan), Tuesday, 5 October 2010 00:48 (thirteen years ago) link

:D x1000000

acoleuthic, Tuesday, 5 October 2010 00:53 (thirteen years ago) link

three months pass...

inspired by reading this piece goole linked on the Giffords shooting thread: http://www.theatlantic.com/politics/print/2011/01/is-jared-loughner-a-white-house-case/69348/

"White House Case" is the term of art used by psychiatrists since the at least the 1960s to describe a distinct subset of the mentally ill who become psychotically preoccupied with the inhabitants of the White House or other government offices.

The White House Case (dark comedy)

Over the years, the psych ward at St. Elizabeth's Hospital's in Washington DC has collected a rag-tag bunch of patients, all committed for exhibiting a peculiar (though not violent) obsession with various US presidents. A group of 5 such patients have over the years formed a close fraternal bond while spending their years in the ward together, each having been committed for their unhealthy obsession with a different late-20th century US president.

One night, they catch wind that some staff at St. Elizabeth's are actually being using their employment as a cover for their membership in a clandestine rogue terrorist group planning on assassinating the current US president. As the only people in the world capable of stopping this plot, they must band together to break out of St. Elizabeth's, warn the authorities of this plot, convince anyone they can that they're not crazy, and save the president's life.

I see this being Eddie Murphy's "comeback" performance as the Regan-obsessed patient.

gr8080, Thursday, 13 January 2011 21:28 (thirteen years ago) link

love it

max, Thursday, 13 January 2011 21:31 (thirteen years ago) link

lets start preproduction next month

max, Thursday, 13 January 2011 21:31 (thirteen years ago) link


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