Breast Augmentation

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I have small breasts - got teased about them in high school (my nickname was "Great American Flatlands") to the point that I begged my mum to buy me padded bras just so I could look more like the other girls did. Long story short, I'm 30 now, and I still have small breasts (having a child didn't help at ALL). I've passed the point where I think I have to have large breasts to attract attention - I'm in a perfectly comfortable relationship with a wonderful man who would love me if I had no breasts at all. Having recently come into a little bit of money, however, I'm thinking seriously about having breast augmentation surgery. If I do it, it will be for *myself* not because I want to attract attention - I just want bigger boobs. Any thoughts?

luna (luna.c), Monday, 28 October 2002 08:58 (twenty-one years ago) link

I like small breasts, so I don't want you to do it. Then again, they're yours, so it's really up to you. How big do you want to be?

Eyeball Kicks (Eyeball Kicks), Monday, 28 October 2002 13:48 (twenty-one years ago) link

I agree that the final decision is yours, but please do read up on the incidence of post-surgery scarring and other unpleasant outcomes before making that decision.

Also, what are you looking to get as a result of enlarged breasts? When it comes to school days, I know from personal experience that harassment of that sort can be traumatic. (I was hassled because I was the first to develop and usually was the most heavily endowed in any group.) However, the teasing was probably less about the size of your breasts than that turned out to be an effective way to get your goat.

j.lu (j.lu), Monday, 28 October 2002 14:24 (twenty-one years ago) link

Breast augmentations suck: they don't feel nice, they leave scars, they look ugly, and there are sound medical reasons not to get them. (I mean, ANY size of natural breasts are better than boob-jobs, as far as I'm concerned. And actually I like the small ones best, for what it's worth.) You're 30; don't let your insecure 16-year-old former self boss you around.

Douglas, Monday, 28 October 2002 22:11 (twenty-one years ago) link

Small breasts are new and hip, evidenced by the very skinny runway models who have none.

Leee (Leee), Monday, 28 October 2002 22:25 (twenty-one years ago) link

I'd thought about going from a 36A to a 36C - not an enormous difference - but enough to feel like I actually have 'em. Two friends of mine had them done and they look and feel perfectly natural - apparently the doctor put them in through the navel, which required a drainage tube for several weeks, but left no scars on their breasts and they both love them. On the other hand, I know a few women who have had them and hate them because they've had nothing but problems. I've spoken to a doctor who assures me that I will have minimal scarring and won't lose nipple sensitivity (not sure how common this is, but it's a big issure for me) and I'm still on the fence.

I'd been thinking I want them just because I want them - never had them and now there's a way I can - but Douglas, I think maybe you do have a point - maybe I am letting the 16 year old me boss the 30 year old me around...

Maybe I should just buy more padded bras.

luna (luna.c), Monday, 28 October 2002 23:35 (twenty-one years ago) link

padded bras rule.

I have nothing against plastic surgery (whatever makes you happy), but just remember that on skinny women GREAT BIG CARTOON BOOBS can look kind of weird.

felicity (felicity), Tuesday, 29 October 2002 01:24 (twenty-one years ago) link

I would go for padded bras just because I'd rather have small breasts than scars (and mine are smaller than yours, so I sort of know where you're coming from, although it never really bothered me).

Maria (Maria), Tuesday, 29 October 2002 01:34 (twenty-one years ago) link

i would question how satisfying they really would be, because no matter how nice they might look, you'd always know they weren't real.

ron (ron), Tuesday, 29 October 2002 02:18 (twenty-one years ago) link

...a drainage tube...

That is all.

Sarah McLusky (coco), Tuesday, 29 October 2002 21:34 (twenty-one years ago) link

in the end its your decision and as its your body no-one should judge you for it. but unfortunately, women get judged for their bodies no matter what their bodies are like. if you have a problem with your breasts, (and sorry but this is my honest opinion) i doubt augmentation is going to change how you feel about them. (this does not matter whether they are real or not, i just fail to see how a cosmetic change is going to change your self-perception). if it does though, i will be very happy for you.

who, Tuesday, 29 October 2002 22:37 (twenty-one years ago) link

No scars? Are you prepared for the big red welts that will appear on your shoulder from your bra straps straining under the weight of your new breasts? Not scarring exactly, but mine are still there when I wake up in the morning.

Madchen (Madchen), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 11:04 (twenty-one years ago) link

Well there's that, too... and all of these are reasons I haven't done it as yet, and in the long run, probably won't, but I guess part of me will always really *want* to.

luna (luna.c), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 11:38 (twenty-one years ago) link

Someone once asked me to write a feature which would have involved wearing one of those new bras with jam-jar style bits on that somehow naturally plump them up a cup size (in my case 34B to 34C) and even though I'd never thought about it before it was tempting. Although I have to say it was more to do with the fact I'm worried if my hips get any bigger I'm going to end up with that 'classic English pear shape' thing. Bigger boobs would make it that 'classic Hollywood foxy starlet' thing.


Anyway - I digress - I can see where you're coming from, but my aunt had them done though her armpit after breast cancer (giving what my grandmother, looking for the positive side of the illness, called "lovely Pride and Prejudice boobs"). She hated the drainage tube, and to be honest I think she'd have rather kept her old ones.

Anna (Anna), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 12:45 (twenty-one years ago) link

small breasts are sexy.

michael wells (michael w.), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 13:11 (twenty-one years ago) link

jam-jar style bits

??????

(Is it some kind of rhynming slang?)

Graham (graham), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 13:30 (twenty-one years ago) link

i didn't mean to sound like a pervy threadkiller there.

michael wells (michael w.), Wednesday, 30 October 2002 17:01 (twenty-one years ago) link

actually michael, it kinda helps

luna (luna.c), Thursday, 31 October 2002 02:30 (twenty-one years ago) link

im with sarah on this, a drainage tube says it all.
no thanks.
breasts are sexy, big / small / full / pert / tiny / whatever form they come in.
padded bras are great, so keep what you have and spare a thought for those who cant wear most of the things you can without looking top-heavy and ridiculous,who get those strap marks on the shoulder and who wish they had LESS!

donna (donna), Thursday, 31 October 2002 02:52 (twenty-one years ago) link

jar-jar style bits

ron (ron), Thursday, 31 October 2002 07:28 (twenty-one years ago) link

two years pass...
was reading this guardian article linked from aldaily the other day, and besides being terrified by the thought of nipples rotting and falling off, i suddenly became quite firmly (no pun intended) convinced that breast implants are rather sad and ridiculous and wrong, for any reason (perhaps with the exception of post-mastectomy reconstruction). i suppose it's not really any different than feeling you have to live up to any other 'accepted' standard of beauty (tho i wonder just how widely accepted it really is), but somehow the idea that you'd let someone you even *liked* have possibly risky surgery just to get fake bigger boobs seems particularly cro-magnon. not that it takes a smart guy to recognize a pretty face or a shapely nose or whatever.

jermaine (jnoble), Sunday, 31 July 2005 23:23 (eighteen years ago) link

and a couple days ago i made the mistake of turning to mtv a full five minutes before wonder showzen and saw a close up of a girl's face being cut up to a soundtrack of nu-metal instrumental (YEAH HARDCORE FACE CUTUP SLICE EM). it turned out it was "i want a famous face", and she wanted a posh spice face to impress her (quite obviously gay, but thats not really the point here, except to enhance the tragedy of it all) crush, and i mean maybe its shown at 11pm before the counterculture comedy halfhour so all the hipster kids can smirk at it, but it was really just horrible. i'm too tired most days to be a radical anything, but lately i seem to be really sympathizing with the 'beauty industry has gone too far' group, maybe that's just a boringly sane reaction.

jermaine (jnoble), Sunday, 31 July 2005 23:39 (eighteen years ago) link

Women getting breast implants or having surgery really upsets me. I saw a bit of a program the other day where a woman got £100,000 worth of clothes and surgery. She looked better, she had big boobs, she was really happy. But it just made me want to cry. If women have to get surgery to feel that they're worth something, we live in a very rotten society indeed.

Cathy (Cathy), Sunday, 31 July 2005 23:59 (eighteen years ago) link


I always hated fake boobs, but I saw this woman on tv today who got fake boobs because she was so into the fifties look - it was a body modification thing. She was kind of punk, so she didn't look like your typical victim of a poor self-image.

"Shoes," Sheila Jeffreys says, "are almost becoming torture instruments. During a woman's daily make-up ritual, on average she will expose herself to more than 200 synthetic chemicals before she has morning coffee. Regular lipstick wearers will ingest up to four and a half kilos during their lifetime." We are talking about Jeffreys' latest book, Beauty And Misogyny: Harmful Cultural Practices In The West, and she is in full flow about the horrors of what she calls "the brutality of beauty".

This is so over-the-top.

Land Ho (dymaxia), Monday, 1 August 2005 03:52 (eighteen years ago) link

for the record, my friend posted that and forgot to log out - I'm perfectly happy with my own boobs k thx bye.

luna (luna.c), Monday, 1 August 2005 03:54 (eighteen years ago) link

i was gonna say!

jaymc (jaymc), Monday, 1 August 2005 03:56 (eighteen years ago) link

If women have to get surgery to feel that they're worth something, we live in a very rotten society indeed.

HOORAY! Welcome to society. This is your cultural birth. You are welcome here, as long as you don't say douchey things like that anymore.

Paunchy Stratego (kenan), Monday, 1 August 2005 04:10 (eighteen years ago) link

wtf

jaymc (jaymc), Monday, 1 August 2005 04:12 (eighteen years ago) link

The implication there is that surgery makes you a bad female. In a society where surgery is so available, avoiding it becomes a political, not a practical, measure. To imply that getting "work" done makes you less of a woman is insensitive and, actually, kinda stupid.

Paunchy Stratego (kenan), Monday, 1 August 2005 04:18 (eighteen years ago) link

it also describes women as if they - in their glorious multiplicities - are single entity.

mullygrubbr (bulbs), Monday, 1 August 2005 04:20 (eighteen years ago) link

Women are beautful. Women who get breast implants are also beautiful. If you can afford it, why not?

Paunchy Stratego (kenan), Monday, 1 August 2005 04:24 (eighteen years ago) link

By this logic, Kenan, I must ask if you can afford penis lengthening surgery, in that if you can, you must surely lead by example.

Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 1 August 2005 04:26 (eighteen years ago) link

That's pretty silly.

luna (luna.c), Monday, 1 August 2005 04:27 (eighteen years ago) link

There is currently no penis lengthening surgery that works.

Paunchy Stratego (kenan), Monday, 1 August 2005 04:30 (eighteen years ago) link

i'd like to see you get it blown up like a balloon kenan

mullygrubbr (bulbs), Monday, 1 August 2005 04:31 (eighteen years ago) link

I would not like that at all.

Paunchy Stratego (kenan), Monday, 1 August 2005 04:32 (eighteen years ago) link

And "like a balloon" is a hilarious reduction of what breast augmentation involves nowadays.

Paunchy Stratego (kenan), Monday, 1 August 2005 04:39 (eighteen years ago) link

well get it blown up like a breast then!

haitch (haitch), Monday, 1 August 2005 04:40 (eighteen years ago) link

i was just kidding. i'm on yr side.

mullygrubbr (bulbs), Monday, 1 August 2005 04:44 (eighteen years ago) link

Not to brag or amything, but penises are a lot more complicated than breasts. They're not just lumps of fat and some glands. They're way weirder. No one has cracked that mystery yet.

Paunchy Stratego (kenan), Monday, 1 August 2005 04:44 (eighteen years ago) link

no one has cracked the fat!

mullygrubbr (bulbs), Monday, 1 August 2005 04:44 (eighteen years ago) link

(sorry lame pun for aussie viewers)

mullygrubbr (bulbs), Monday, 1 August 2005 04:45 (eighteen years ago) link

!!! !! !!!!!! !! !!! !!!!!!!!!! !!

woodstock, Monday, 1 August 2005 04:52 (eighteen years ago) link

Kenan, I give you the micropenis.

Leeeeeee (Leee), Monday, 1 August 2005 05:55 (eighteen years ago) link

two years pass...

for the record, my friend posted that and forgot to log out - I'm perfectly happy with my own boobs k thx bye.

-- luna (luna.c), Sunday, July 31, 2005 8:54 PM (2 years ago) Bookmark Link
i was gonna say!

-- jaymc (jaymc), Sunday, July 31, 2005 8:56 PM (2 years ago) Bookmark Link

looool

chaki, Monday, 15 October 2007 17:31 (sixteen years ago) link

http://www.bigpunforever.com/9p.jpg

and what, Monday, 15 October 2007 17:32 (sixteen years ago) link

I think it's ridiculous to reply (to her friend) that you, a poster, like small breasts. Some like'em small, some like'em big. It doesn't so much matter what one particular person thinks, just what she feels. She wasn't going from tiny boobies to superbazookas (which, if I recall correctly very few surgeons would give her). That said, there are a lot of dangers to it (fucking up immune system, leakage, nipple insensivity,...).

I wonder what she did. Did she have'em done or not?

stevienixed, Monday, 15 October 2007 17:51 (sixteen years ago) link

Let's not keep this thread anywhere close to the top. Chaki's on a personal tear to badmouth Luna. This is not a real revival.

Misery, Monday, 15 October 2007 17:52 (sixteen years ago) link

nice work not keeping it from the top, mizzz.

chaki, Monday, 15 October 2007 17:53 (sixteen years ago) link

I try to sit at the bar and fish extra olives out of the garnish tray when the bartender isn't busy. Helps if you know the bartender.

Laurel, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 01:31 (sixteen years ago) link

Someone, a friend, soaked a whole bunch of lychees in vodka for two weeks.......NOM and extra dranked after like ten of them!

Abbott, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 01:33 (sixteen years ago) link

dateline worthy: if luna had scammed people out of money via a fake internet persona in order to afford fake breasts.

bnw, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 01:34 (sixteen years ago) link

Can you still lactate after fake boobage?

Abbott, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 01:35 (sixteen years ago) link

Well, not you specifically, but the augmented being?

Abbott, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 01:35 (sixteen years ago) link

That should certainly be googleable data. I'm on it.

Beth Parker, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 01:39 (sixteen years ago) link

I'm sure you can, if based only on rrrobyn's diagrams

kenan, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 01:40 (sixteen years ago) link

depends on where they make the incision

Beth Parker, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 01:42 (sixteen years ago) link

I thought generally speaking the answer was no? But that you don't know until you get pregnant and try it -- I guess the...severing? disruption? (or conversely, preservation) of the milk ducts isn't an exact science.

Go figure, something invasive and (mostly) unnecessary that is solely performed on women isn't particularly well researched for the drawbacks that don't affect the patient's supposed sex appeal.

xp ahh, thanks, Beth. Does that come with a gin martini?

Laurel, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 01:43 (sixteen years ago) link


If the nerves around the areola were not cut or damaged during surgery, you may be able to nurse fully or partially. Nerves are vital to breastfeeding since they trigger the brain to release prolactin and oxytocin, two hormones that affect milk production. Your chances of breastfeeding also improve if your milk duct system is intact.

Oh god, there's reasons beyond suckling I wouldn't want nerve nippular damage.

thx for the research Beth!

Abbott, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 01:44 (sixteen years ago) link

I always think "What if that lady in Grapes of Wrath had a boob job? Would she have been able to breastfeed that man to keep him alive still? Or would the most jaw-dropping moment in all of high school English be the ending of 'The Necklace' instead?"

Abbott, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 01:45 (sixteen years ago) link

It's like a pornographic "Gift of the Magi": she gets implants to make herself more desirable, thereby increasing her chances of getting hitched and/or pregnant...and then can't save a member of the set she was trying to attract.

Laurel, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 01:47 (sixteen years ago) link

The GRAPES of wrath indeed

(you see the milk glands are all bunched up like widdle grapey wapes, or bindles of chicken fat.)

Abbott, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 01:48 (sixteen years ago) link

Out of desperation I once tried to cream my coffee with my own breast milk. Took about a cup to do the job. That stuff may be sweet but it's way nonfat.

Beth Parker, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 01:49 (sixteen years ago) link

I don't believe you.

Laurel, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 01:52 (sixteen years ago) link

I mean I am militant about milk in coffee and also unusually hippie-ish in my feelings about bodily fluids but I don't think my own breastmilk would be an option. For me.

Laurel, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 01:54 (sixteen years ago) link

It's true. I nursed my kids for 4 years straight, so I had a ready supply.

Beth Parker, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 01:54 (sixteen years ago) link

You'd do it too, if you got up and there was no freaking milk for the coffee.

Beth Parker, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 01:55 (sixteen years ago) link

xp What, in the freezer?

Laurel, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 01:55 (sixteen years ago) link

in her breasts!

rrrobyn, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 01:56 (sixteen years ago) link

yep, time to go home

omar little, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 01:57 (sixteen years ago) link

also lol "nippular"

rrrobyn, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 01:57 (sixteen years ago) link

wow. i prefer half & half in my coffee, do i even want to ask what the diy equal of that would be?

chicago kevin, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 01:57 (sixteen years ago) link

Gallons. Whole tittiesful.

Beth Parker, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 01:58 (sixteen years ago) link

On the bright side, you don't have to add sugar.

Laurel, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 01:59 (sixteen years ago) link

Or colostrum.

Laurel, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 02:00 (sixteen years ago) link

I conveyed the milk directly from glandular structure into coffee cup, by means of a rolling thumb/index finger action.

Beth Parker, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 02:00 (sixteen years ago) link

I hate it when there's no colostrum in the morning.

Laurel, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 02:00 (sixteen years ago) link

Wow I really do not want to write my resume.

Laurel, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 02:02 (sixteen years ago) link

Wow I really do not want to write my resume.

-- Laurel, Tuesday, October 16, 2007 9:02 PM (Tuesday, October 16, 2007 9:02 PM) Bookmark Link

hi dere, wait until you have to write cover letters.

chicago kevin, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 02:04 (sixteen years ago) link

Oh, I'm not going to do that. I'm going to give my resume to people I know at various publishing houses and let THEM rep me. At least that's the plan.

Laurel, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 02:06 (sixteen years ago) link

i'm thinking about bagging the european tour and getting out of chicago for the winter. if i don't land something quick there's really no reason to stay here.

chicago kevin, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 02:09 (sixteen years ago) link

but that's for another time, back to titties and coffee.

chicago kevin, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 02:09 (sixteen years ago) link

If you get a firm enough implant you should be able to set your coffee cup right up there, no problem.

Beth Parker, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 02:12 (sixteen years ago) link

Or even implants, plural.

Beth Parker, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 02:12 (sixteen years ago) link

yes, that is what everyone wants in a breast

kenan, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 02:13 (sixteen years ago) link

We all need extra storage space.

Beth Parker, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 02:13 (sixteen years ago) link

My kitchen is woefully lacking in counter space. The implant option makes a lot of sense.

Beth Parker, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 02:14 (sixteen years ago) link

If you get a firm enough implant you should be able to set your coffee cup right up there, no problem.

anyone remember those stretch armstrong dolls from the 70s? maybe you could get implants made out of that stuff?

chicago kevin, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 02:14 (sixteen years ago) link

You could mold actual cupholders! A chest console!

Beth Parker, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 02:15 (sixteen years ago) link

i keep reading implant as eggplant

rrrobyn, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 02:15 (sixteen years ago) link

They're very similar.

Beth Parker, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 02:16 (sixteen years ago) link

You could mold actual cupholders! A chest console!

that's exactly what i was thinking.

chicago kevin, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 02:16 (sixteen years ago) link

spare change, beat-up old ipod, loose cigarettes...

kenan, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 02:18 (sixteen years ago) link

Gives a whole new meaning to "cup-size."

Beth Parker, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 02:18 (sixteen years ago) link

I'm a 36 Venti.

Beth Parker, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 02:18 (sixteen years ago) link

ILX: A storm in a C-cup

Laurel, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 02:20 (sixteen years ago) link

HA

kenan, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 02:20 (sixteen years ago) link

lol, laurel told deeznuts off for being an ass on the tits thread.

estela, Wednesday, 17 October 2007 02:31 (sixteen years ago) link


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