[1P3 ROCKTOBER] Ask Ned Raggett, ROCKTOBER EDITION

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This is an 1p3 exclusive!! This month only, you'll be able to ask the only ILX celebrity (since Momus died and Robin Carmody doesn't post here anymore) any question you like. And he might just respond!

Only on 1p3!

By the way, can someone let Ned know about this thread? Kthx.

King Boy Pato, Monday, 1 October 2007 12:11 (7 years ago) Permalink

1. Who is Robin Carmody?

roxymuzak, Monday, 1 October 2007 17:21 (7 years ago) Permalink

Raggett Trivia:

Ned will be spending a good part of 1P3 ROCKTOBER in the Hawaiian Islands.

gr8080, Monday, 1 October 2007 18:33 (7 years ago) Permalink

2. Is anaheim REALLY in the OC? If so:

a. was marissa living down the road from disbeyland?
b. OMG IVE BEEN TO THE OC!!!

sunny successor, Monday, 1 October 2007 19:51 (7 years ago) Permalink

Hmm, he said.

1. Robin Carmody is a man of mystery.

2. It is really in the OC:

2a. Marissa may well have been living down the road from Disneyland. So did Gwen Stefani.

2b. I cannot contest this observation.

Ned Raggett, Monday, 1 October 2007 20:08 (7 years ago) Permalink

3. Ned: Do you want to learn how to surf while staying in Hawaii?

gr8080, Monday, 1 October 2007 20:42 (7 years ago) Permalink

3. Alas I must turn this down, as I do not know how to swim, which could cause me as an amateur surfer some grave discomfort.

Ned Raggett, Monday, 1 October 2007 22:29 (7 years ago) Permalink

HI, NED!

roxymuzak, Monday, 1 October 2007 23:56 (7 years ago) Permalink

4. Are you man enough to take the 1p3psi challenge??

King Boy Pato, Tuesday, 2 October 2007 00:19 (7 years ago) Permalink

estie are you referring to this?

gr8080, Tuesday, 2 October 2007 00:21 (7 years ago) Permalink

HI, NED!

I send greetings to the personage known as roxymuzak. Hello, personage.

4. I am not man enough. Indeed, it is well known that I am a eunuch, and in fact am completely smooth. My deep voice is altered by means of trickery. My beard is pasted on daily, then removed by a false razor. The XY chromosomes allegedly mine are entirely fraudulent, and injected daily by an evil doctor. I would weep, but my tear ducts were used to create a false urethra as needed.

Ned Raggett, Tuesday, 2 October 2007 00:33 (7 years ago) Permalink

5. Why doesn't Jean answer us?

roxymuzak, Tuesday, 2 October 2007 01:09 (7 years ago) Permalink

5. Jean is indisposed. Possibly dead.

Ned Raggett, Tuesday, 2 October 2007 01:22 (7 years ago) Permalink

6. Whatareya?!?

King Boy Pato, Tuesday, 2 October 2007 01:31 (7 years ago) Permalink

6. An agglomeration of atoms dipped in brandy.

Ned Raggett, Tuesday, 2 October 2007 01:33 (7 years ago) Permalink

7.a. Red or white wine?

7.b. Is it acceptable for males to drink low carb beer?

W4LTER, Tuesday, 2 October 2007 01:35 (7 years ago) Permalink

7a. It would be wise to consider one's choice of cuisine. If, however, this is not a factor, it should be noted that red does not require chilling to be savored and enjoyed. It also goes spectacularly well with chocolate. Further notes on the efficacy of this combination in certain personal situations could be given, but are not needed.

7b. Acceptability is a loaded notion. In some cultures it is accepted to blow your nose on someone's shirt-tail before engaging their housepet in coition. (The veracity of the foregoing claim is questionable.) Therefore one should ask instead if pleasing yourself is key. If so, engage in this behavior, being always mindful of the fact that pleasing yourself in public is considered high-risk behavior for arrest.

Ned Raggett, Tuesday, 2 October 2007 02:01 (7 years ago) Permalink

8. Ned - why cant I enjoy any alcohol with food at all? The only beverage I can drink with a meal is water.

gr8080, Tuesday, 2 October 2007 02:10 (7 years ago) Permalink

9. Ned - W1TCH 1 OF US b TEH RAEL N00d SPOOK???

Heave Ho, Tuesday, 2 October 2007 02:16 (7 years ago) Permalink

8. This is very unfortunate! I would be gravely disappointed with life if I could not do such a thing, and would seek to blame a gypsy curse or evil gnomes in lieu of anything else. I can but conclude that something in alcohol and your systems requires an otherwise empty stomach, but that seems far too limited. I would suggest some sort of experimentation to see if there are combinations that work but if nothing has availed, consult your doctor and ask. Sadly, there may simply be no solution.

9. Reality as such is hogwash. The question is moot.

Ned Raggett, Tuesday, 2 October 2007 02:50 (7 years ago) Permalink

10. Obie Trice: Man or Myth?

11. Who is your favourite Australian Rules Football player of all time and why? (Mark "Jacko" Jackson is not an acceptable choice.)

12. Who let the dogs out? Who who who?

King Boy Pato, Tuesday, 2 October 2007 03:25 (7 years ago) Permalink

10. Existence is confirmed by the name. Had there been no name in particular, there would have been no existence. This is why the Sasquatch is false, as in fact there is no proper name it has.

11. Australian Rules football appears to exist in a world where old men in pith helmets are given undue respect. From the perspective of the 21st century, this is a false religion. Its idols must be destroyed.

12. Fred, last Sunday.

Ned Raggett, Tuesday, 2 October 2007 04:06 (7 years ago) Permalink

13. Am I gonna see the Biff again?

King Boy Pato, Tuesday, 2 October 2007 04:24 (7 years ago) Permalink

This is great.

roxymuzak, Tuesday, 2 October 2007 04:30 (7 years ago) Permalink

13. The Biff has received your desire but feels that you have expressed yourself poorly until now. Among other things he wants to be known as Monsieur Le Beouf.

Ned Raggett, Tuesday, 2 October 2007 04:46 (7 years ago) Permalink

!!

roxymuzak, Tuesday, 2 October 2007 04:47 (7 years ago) Permalink

lolz

Curt1s Stephens, Tuesday, 2 October 2007 08:18 (7 years ago) Permalink

I hope Ned Raggett never visits Newcastle, Australia!!

King Boy Pato, Tuesday, 2 October 2007 08:37 (7 years ago) Permalink

Phrase it in the form of a question.

Ned Raggett, Tuesday, 2 October 2007 12:51 (7 years ago) Permalink

14. What would you do if ever faced with the prospect of the Biff coming back (and God willing, it will)?

King Boy Pato, Tuesday, 2 October 2007 13:20 (7 years ago) Permalink

I'm happy we found our Grand Marshall.

Pleasant Plains, Tuesday, 2 October 2007 14:19 (7 years ago) Permalink

Ned is the Santa at the end of the parade.

roxymuzak, Tuesday, 2 October 2007 15:46 (7 years ago) Permalink

15. List top 5 halloween costumes you have worn.

16. Why hasn't anybody said how freakin cute my kid is in her lastest parenting thread photo? Has breeding made them BLIND?!?

sunny successor, Tuesday, 2 October 2007 15:51 (7 years ago) Permalink

Jerks!

roxymuzak, Tuesday, 2 October 2007 16:02 (7 years ago) Permalink

17.a What is your favourite shopped picture of yourself, made by someone else
17.b Are you pleased with this shop:

Heave Ho, Tuesday, 2 October 2007 16:52 (7 years ago) Permalink

In order:

14. The prospect concerns me not at all. You have confused with an entity that gives a damn. I do not, being removed from your petty foibles and concerns in this alleged 'life' you lead. Instead I am saturnine and reserved, observing and recording. Occasionally I eat.

15. These would include:

* Pac-Man
* Charlie Brown
* Raistlin
* A generic magician (you can never have enough)
* An extra from the movie The Apple, of which I am greatly fond.

16. The cuteness of your daughter is acknowledged. It is possible at the time of posting that most observers of the thread were drunk or otherwise incapacitated. Blindness is possible too, and you should stop being rude about people who suffer from it, since there but for the grace of god and/or myself go you. Jeez.

17. Favorite shopped photo. Hmm. I have no outstanding examples, being simply and stupidly pleased with them all.

17a. It would appear that the Maselamb's neck is broken. That might be causing pain. You should reconsider.

Ned Raggett, Tuesday, 2 October 2007 18:25 (7 years ago) Permalink

I think I'm going to ignore the questions and just read the answers from now on.

Pleasant Plains, Tuesday, 2 October 2007 18:33 (7 years ago) Permalink

Lol @ immediate coining of "Maselamb."

roxymuzak, Tuesday, 2 October 2007 19:28 (7 years ago) Permalink

18. Why da hate for the Biff?
19. Should Vini Reilly try In-N-Out Burger?

King Boy Pato, Wednesday, 3 October 2007 04:05 (7 years ago) Permalink

18. I never hate the Biff, or a Biff or even a side of Biff. Clearly you are insane.

19. Vini Reilly, it is well known, is made of matchsticks, cotton and felt. As such he is somewhat delicate, and it is to be feared that a burger of any sort might cause his system some distress. The specific reason for this can be found in the interaction of various products to be found in the burger. It can be assumed that in anything resembling a 'special sauce' is some form of enzyme which devours mitochondria. Mr. Reilly would perish in seconds. Therefore, he should not try it, unless you are his enemy and wish to force a burger upon him. Be careful how you force it down his throat, your hands may get sticky.

Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 3 October 2007 04:34 (7 years ago) Permalink

20. Ned, why do people lie?

roxymuzak, Wednesday, 3 October 2007 05:02 (7 years ago) Permalink

20. Because they are:

* conniving
* nervous
* ashamed
* evil
* stupid
* forgetful

Delete as appropriate. Combine together into one human being as needed, then boil in oil. Repeat if necessary.

Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 3 October 2007 05:18 (7 years ago) Permalink

21. Did Marty McFly really invent Rock and Roll or have those Hollywood SCUMBAGS been lying to us??

King Boy Pato, Wednesday, 3 October 2007 09:07 (7 years ago) Permalink

21. The inventor of rock and roll was one Edna Esclavos, who lived in the small town of Dubston in Feedlenix County, Kansas. Bored with life in 1954, she made a guitar out of hay and a fence post and proceeded to proclaim that 'society is a hole' and that everyone should collective put all their hands on what she described as 'the big one,' but she refused clarification on this point when interviewed by the weekly paper, the Feedlenix Finder-Observer. Her husband protested this turn of events but the huge crowds that gathered back behind their old outhouse, where Edna would play on the roof, would hear no argument otherwise. Tragically she died when lightning struck her after a ten-minute guitar solo, but a young James Brown swore upon her grave he would 'uplift the masses and their asses' by means of a tribute show to her every night. He stopped after two days but no matter.

Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 3 October 2007 14:52 (7 years ago) Permalink

21 wins

sunny successor, Wednesday, 3 October 2007 15:01 (7 years ago) Permalink

We all must remember to THANK Mr. Raggett, isn't that right, 1p3?

roxymuzak, Wednesday, 3 October 2007 16:51 (7 years ago) Permalink

22. tips on picking up ladies, plz

gr8080, Wednesday, 3 October 2007 18:20 (7 years ago) Permalink

22. As follows (in order desired, or of desire -- working also under the assumption that the generic picker-upper I am creating is, like our Mr. Gr8080, of the male persuasion):

* "HI DERE" or equivalent. Politer the better if first approach to said lass of interest. Overly polite, ie, "Prithee fair maiden hast thou seen the bar list" or whatever = you are either Adam Ant in the "Prince Charming" video (good, very very good) or you are an SCA/RenFest reject (go wash immediately, shave off your scraggly beard and in general know you will not know love at all until you realize what a terrible mistake your life has been until now -- do not sidestep into Star Trek conventions either).

* It is well known that the Mere Male, who can be very, very Mere, often has an appreciation of the female bosom in all its ways. All sides knowing this, it is therefore wise upon first introduction and discussion to remember to look into her *eyes* rather than at her *cleavage.* The Merest of Males forget this simple note, and wonder why they are once again wanking themselves to sleep later on in the evening, the deep-fried mini-tacos and the endless PBRs or Grolschs having again sadly precluded sense and tact. Apply similar standards to other parts of the body one might fetishize, ie ass, elbow (know the difference between these two), legs, feet (unless you are Quentin Tarantino, in which case it is obvious why you are talking to her feet), etc.

* Humor good. Bad humor bad. Know the difference. "Nice shoes, wanna fuck" or any equivalent of a 'ha ha' pick up line = you are bereft of life, sense and any form of brainpower. Allow yourself to be mulched for the benefit of humanity.

* If you are under the assumption that all you want out of the chance encounter you are currently engineering is a conducting of social relations for an evening in the privacy of one's own home/bedsit/car/park bench and nothing more, that's fine, but it would be handy if you read the appropriate signals the lady you are talking with is giving off in this matter. If she is interested and things progress from there, hurrah. If she is not interested, take the hint. If you persist, she will seek to leave. If you do anything stupider in this situation, mockery will be the least of your problems. Don't make us find you and kill you.

* Brush your goddamn teeth, floss, and otherwise take care of yourself. If you need me to spell this out for you, you are already in deep trouble.

Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 3 October 2007 18:56 (7 years ago) Permalink

any equivalent of a 'ha ha' pick up line = you are bereft of life, sense and any form of brainpower. Allow yourself to be mulched for the benefit of humanity.any equivalent of a 'ha ha' pick up line = you are bereft of life, sense and any form of brainpower. Allow yourself to be mulched for the benefit of humanity.any equivalent of a 'ha ha' pick up line = you are bereft of life, sense and any form of brainpower. Allow yourself to be mulched for the benefit of humanity.any equivalent of a 'ha ha' pick up line = you are bereft of life, sense and any form of brainpower. Allow yourself to be mulched for the benefit of humanity.any equivalent of a 'ha ha' pick up line = you are bereft of life, sense and any form of brainpower. Allow yourself to be mulched for the benefit of humanity.any equivalent of a 'ha ha' pick up line = you are bereft of life, sense and any form of brainpower. Allow yourself to be mulched for the benefit of humanity.

This is classic stuff!!

roxymuzak, Wednesday, 3 October 2007 19:12 (7 years ago) Permalink

Ned u r kewl.

23. You come over and watch the Cubs game with the exploited 18 year olds y/n?

en i see kay, Wednesday, 3 October 2007 19:19 (7 years ago) Permalink

I hope my reputation never dies.

Ned Raggett, Friday, 15 February 2008 16:38 (6 years ago) Permalink

there music has taught me about stuff you wouldnt even learn in school, i am politically smarter than anyone else my age because of themthere music has taught me about stuff you wouldnt even learn in school, i am politically smarter than anyone else my age because of themthere music has taught me about stuff you wouldnt even learn in school, i am politically smarter than anyone else my age because of themthere music has taught me about stuff you wouldnt even learn in school, i am politically smarter than anyone else my age because of them

roxymuzak, Friday, 15 February 2008 17:38 (6 years ago) Permalink

1 month passes...

manics91 (21 minutes ago) Show Hide
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its not obssesiveness.. we would say this in anyones favour.. it is unfair to say that someones stupid cos they killed themselves..

1. RICHEY WASNT FOUND SO ITS NOT CALLED SUICIDE RETARD ITS CALLED MISSING!

2. RICHEY EDWARDS WAS/IS PROBABLY THE MOST INTELLIGENT MAN IN THE WORLD

i suggest you think b4 posting old men making a dick of emselves!!!

gr8080, Tuesday, 18 March 2008 18:25 (6 years ago) Permalink

RICHEY EDWARDS WAS/IS PROBABLY THE MOST INTELLIGENT MAN IN THE WORLD!

roxymuzak, Tuesday, 18 March 2008 19:24 (6 years ago) Permalink

74. This shall not occur. I have standards.

75. Only until the first, sad, failed teabagging.

And good night.

-- Ned Raggett, Wednesday, October 31, 2007 10:49 PM (Wednesday, October 31, 2007 10:49 PM) Bookmark Link

^^^classic out of context lulz

The Reverend, Tuesday, 18 March 2008 22:49 (6 years ago) Permalink

manics91 (41 minutes ago) Show Hide
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jumping of a bridge is dumb.... ill tell ya whats dumb a dumb fuck american = kurk cobain shotting himself in his garage....

but richey has been missing for 12 years... no official evidence of cloths, body, NOTHING... he dissaperred without money and a passport!! so you think thats dumb??? get a life..

gr8080, Wednesday, 19 March 2008 00:37 (6 years ago) Permalink

lol how do i shot self in garage

gr8080, Wednesday, 19 March 2008 00:37 (6 years ago) Permalink

RICHEY EDWARDS WAS/IS PROBABLY THE MOST INTELLIGENT MAN IN THE WORLD!

I concur with this shit

Noodle Vague, Wednesday, 19 March 2008 00:38 (6 years ago) Permalink

clubkidparty | February 05, 2008 (Block User)
hahahahahahahha

someone like you, with a mullet, tiny dick, no muscle, fat from yesteryear, and no job comes here to talk shit.

hahahahahahahhahahahahaahah

please dude, anyone on this site could fucking take you.

anyone in oasis could take you.

yr a 50 year old pussy living off the welfare system in his mothers garage.

scum like you should be killed.

gr8080, Monday, 24 March 2008 05:45 (6 years ago) Permalink

fat from yesteryear

gr8080, Monday, 24 March 2008 05:45 (6 years ago) Permalink

Steveothebud (3 months ago) Show Hide
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My conclusion is

*that your not even fairly inteligant..

Tuomas, Monday, 24 March 2008 08:49 (6 years ago) Permalink

Oh, that was already posted. sorry.

Tuomas, Monday, 24 March 2008 08:50 (6 years ago) Permalink

Reading all those comments on Ned's Manic Street Preacher video, I can't believe the amount of MSP fans who think that one guy is just "missing", and that he didn't commit suicide.

Tuomas, Monday, 24 March 2008 08:54 (6 years ago) Permalink

1 month passes...

lethalpayne1 (9 hours ago) Show Hide
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why the fuck would anyone wanna take on america... fucking talentless pricks lol...

this asshole is a shite music jernalist:

drummer didnt make a racist comment, richey has not been proved dead, richey didnt take any drugs... manics arent arena rock u dumbass fagot.. i saw them in a university.. and your the fat fuck so why arent you listening to the manics... your an idot...

gr8080, Tuesday, 29 April 2008 19:16 (6 years ago) Permalink

Richey is still out there trying to find the right size banana suit for Nicky. He'll be back.

King Boy Pato, Wednesday, 30 April 2008 02:06 (6 years ago) Permalink

it's a tough fit

roxymuzak, Wednesday, 30 April 2008 04:35 (6 years ago) Permalink

1 month passes...

NED WILL BE APPEARING LIVE IN NEW YORK JUNE 28. PLS TO SUBMIT YOUR QUESTIONS NOW!!!!

tehresa, Monday, 23 June 2008 18:23 (6 years ago) Permalink

HI DERE PLS TO EXPLAIN IN WHICH DIRECTION THE BRONX AND BATTERY ARE RESPECTIVELY

Autumn Almanac, Monday, 23 June 2008 21:22 (6 years ago) Permalink

ned-

why does king boy pato wear a cape?

-gr8080

gr8080, Tuesday, 24 June 2008 00:33 (6 years ago) Permalink

Ned-

Why does Kevin Shields say "we want hen fap" in "What You Want"?

-Curt1s

Curt1s Stephens, Tuesday, 24 June 2008 01:16 (6 years ago) Permalink

get yr questions in soon!!

tehresa, Wednesday, 25 June 2008 22:18 (6 years ago) Permalink

ned -

what is the silliest outfit you have ever worn? this includes anything you have been forced to wear, as well as things you have chosen to wear.

-roxy

roxymuzak, Thursday, 26 June 2008 17:14 (6 years ago) Permalink

i only have 4 questions here, guys. that's not even long enough for an oprah segment.

tehresa, Saturday, 28 June 2008 14:27 (6 years ago) Permalink

Dear Ned Raggett-

What would you suggest is the best way for me to become an internet rock music critic?

Also, how can i get beer w/o a fake ID????

-Anthony

Anthony Michael Samson, Saturday, 28 June 2008 14:30 (6 years ago) Permalink

same answer for both questions

roxymuzak, Sunday, 29 June 2008 01:06 (6 years ago) Permalink

answers have been submitted. videos will be uploaded shortly!

tehresa, Sunday, 29 June 2008 03:35 (6 years ago) Permalink

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_elsHJKv1pM

tehresa, Sunday, 29 June 2008 03:53 (6 years ago) Permalink

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_UXGevBJrL8

tehresa, Sunday, 29 June 2008 04:02 (6 years ago) Permalink

sexy nip

velko, Sunday, 29 June 2008 04:12 (6 years ago) Permalink

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MoaNAczh16I

tehresa, Sunday, 29 June 2008 04:25 (6 years ago) Permalink

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mWUUyxqv0xo

tehresa, Sunday, 29 June 2008 04:25 (6 years ago) Permalink

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ns5S-u9hdt4

tehresa, Sunday, 29 June 2008 04:29 (6 years ago) Permalink

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=skSlkTSunGU

tehresa, Sunday, 29 June 2008 04:42 (6 years ago) Permalink

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wjIF5vd2YXU

tehresa, Sunday, 29 June 2008 04:42 (6 years ago) Permalink

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=65-GXm6U-UM

tehresa, Sunday, 29 June 2008 04:49 (6 years ago) Permalink

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J0ynuqptL9Y

tehresa, Sunday, 29 June 2008 04:53 (6 years ago) Permalink

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oBCksPDQyek

tehresa, Sunday, 29 June 2008 04:58 (6 years ago) Permalink

ah damn, should have thought to submit a question.

latebloomer, Sunday, 29 June 2008 20:16 (6 years ago) Permalink

ah damn, should have thought to submit a question about a polarizing britpop band.

gr8080, Monday, 30 June 2008 05:08 (6 years ago) Permalink

gr8080, Monday, 30 June 2008 05:08 (6 years ago) Permalink

"too short pussy pop"

poll plz

sunny successor, Monday, 30 June 2008 06:09 (6 years ago) Permalink

reads like lyrics to the best daft punk song ever

J0rdan S., Monday, 30 June 2008 06:11 (6 years ago) Permalink

im gonna vote for "hillary clinton screensavers"

J0rdan S., Monday, 30 June 2008 06:11 (6 years ago) Permalink

lol @ these!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

roxymuzak, Friday, 4 July 2008 00:03 (6 years ago) Permalink

And I thank you all.

Ned Raggett, Friday, 4 July 2008 02:26 (6 years ago) Permalink

1 month passes...

sexe cunt anal booty thong

Curt1s Stephens, Friday, 15 August 2008 05:20 (6 years ago) Permalink

2 months pass...

riw1989 has made a comment on Ned Raggett: T/S: Manic Street Preachers vs Gay Dad:

You fail to mention the fact that Edwards wrote the greatest "dark" album ever. I've yet to encounter an album which takes all the problems of modern life. Wire also successfuly tackled this as well in many different songs too, design for life and ifwhiteamericatoldthetruthforonedayit'sworldwouldfallapart to name two. So, you completely failed to talk about anything musically by the manics with Richey and agreed that he is more intelligent than you. Good job you moron.

♪☺♫☻ (gr8080), Saturday, 25 October 2008 00:56 (6 years ago) Permalink

haha failed to mention that one

○◙i shine cuz i genital grind◙○ (roxymuzak), Saturday, 25 October 2008 16:38 (6 years ago) Permalink

4 years pass...

ᶓ͠סּᴥ͠סּᶔ ᶓͼ᷆ₓͼ᷇ᶔ (gr8080), Monday, 16 September 2013 16:15 (1 year ago) Permalink

4 weeks pass...

my account w/ all the ask ned raggett videos was deleted by youtube after using it to troll metallica fans but thankfully one outraged manic street preachers fan reposted this one:

ᶓ͠סּᴥ͠סּᶔ ᶓͼ᷆ₓͼ᷇ᶔ (gr8080), Tuesday, 15 October 2013 16:47 (1 year ago) Permalink


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