Alex James and Jamie Oliver bring YOU...Feastival

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Musician Alex James and chef Jamie Oliver are to host a new music and food festival in Oxfordshire this weekend.

Jamie Oliver presents The Big Feastival is being held at the Blur bassist's farm in Kingham.

More than 10,000 people are expected to attend two days of music headlined by Paloma Faith and Texas.

Oliver will also show off his drumming skills on stage with James for a one-off performance in a band called The Farm Lovin' Criminals.

Ned Raggett, Sunday, 2 September 2012 13:58 (8 months ago) Permalink

urge to kill rising

boooooo he ain't hardcore (Noodle Vague), Sunday, 2 September 2012 14:00 (8 months ago) Permalink

After he fucked up that festival so badly last year (where he nearly bankrupted one of the local schools in the process) why why WHY is he doing this again?

There's a point in celebrity and wealth where people's self belief and entitlement way outstrips their abilities and Alex James passed that point a long time ago.

my god it's full of straw (White Chocolate Cheesecake), Sunday, 2 September 2012 14:10 (8 months ago) Permalink

I think he claimed he didn't actually organise the last one. It was just held on his land and had his name attached to it.

Temporarily Famous In The Czech Republic (ShariVari), Sunday, 2 September 2012 14:13 (8 months ago) Permalink

Between them, you think they'd be able to find more interesting bands.

djh, Sunday, 2 September 2012 14:16 (8 months ago) Permalink

"Back one night only...Toploader!"

Ned Raggett, Sunday, 2 September 2012 14:17 (8 months ago) Permalink

Actually I love how bare bones and nothing their Wikipedia entry is:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toploader

Ned Raggett, Sunday, 2 September 2012 14:18 (8 months ago) Permalink

Reflects how nothing they are.

wise men farting over you (snoball), Sunday, 2 September 2012 14:21 (8 months ago) Permalink

being held at the Blur bassist's farm in Kingham.

Instead of 'Feastival', they could reasonably call this whole thing 'Cockfarmers',

wise men farting over you (snoball), Sunday, 2 September 2012 14:22 (8 months ago) Permalink

Because they are cocks, and farmers.
And cockfarmers.

wise men farting over you (snoball), Sunday, 2 September 2012 14:22 (8 months ago) Permalink

Is anyone going to get paid this time, then?

emil.y, Sunday, 2 September 2012 14:23 (8 months ago) Permalink

Oliver will also show off his drumming skills on stage with James for a one-off performance in a band called The Farm Lovin' Criminals.

Oh Christ, I only just spotted this line. I despair for humanity, I really do.

emil.y, Sunday, 2 September 2012 14:24 (8 months ago) Permalink

Come, friendly bombs...

still small voice of clam (a passing spacecadet), Sunday, 2 September 2012 14:31 (8 months ago) Permalink

Cock-Farming Criminals has a good ring to it.

I am just so ashamed of every thing that man touches these days. He makes my vagina weep. Why couldn't I have been a Dave fan?

my god it's full of straw (White Chocolate Cheesecake), Sunday, 2 September 2012 14:44 (8 months ago) Permalink

i dunno being a tory pm isn't great either.

tubular, mondo, gnabry (Merdeyeux), Sunday, 2 September 2012 14:55 (8 months ago) Permalink

I meant the ginger one that played drums and campaigned for New Labour... Oh, shit, wait.

my god it's full of straw (White Chocolate Cheesecake), Sunday, 2 September 2012 14:56 (8 months ago) Permalink

What on earth is Our Beloved Leader wearing in that photo?

direct references of (seandalai), Sunday, 2 September 2012 16:32 (8 months ago) Permalink

boutique baby accessory.

tubular, mondo, gnabry (Merdeyeux), Sunday, 2 September 2012 16:34 (8 months ago) Permalink

Alex James came dressed as an English teacher rapidly approaching hatred of all children.

wise men farting over you (snoball), Sunday, 2 September 2012 16:52 (8 months ago) Permalink

no leather elbow patches - perhaps those are the teacher's signifier of having finally reached hatred of all children

still small voice of clam (a passing spacecadet), Sunday, 2 September 2012 17:11 (8 months ago) Permalink

hopefully someone will drunkenly abscond with a tractor and mow down the ruddy lot of them

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Sunday, 2 September 2012 17:57 (8 months ago) Permalink

So, is anybody going?

Mark G, Monday, 3 September 2012 06:08 (8 months ago) Permalink

I don't think they'd let me in with my 'bottles pre-filled with urine' stall.

wise men farting over you (snoball), Monday, 3 September 2012 06:48 (8 months ago) Permalink

ya, thinking of signing up as a "rotten vegetables for throwing" vendor

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Monday, 3 September 2012 06:51 (8 months ago) Permalink

disappointed to find out that "The TG Collective" wasn't what i thought

boooooo he ain't hardcore (Noodle Vague), Monday, 3 September 2012 08:13 (8 months ago) Permalink

Jamie Oliver could do a cover of 'Hamburger Lady', dedicated to the woman who fed her kids hamburgers through the school railings.

wise men farting over you (snoball), Monday, 3 September 2012 08:16 (8 months ago) Permalink

Actually it would have been great if something called The TG Collective had turned out to be the TG equivalent of ABBA Teens or S Club Juniors.

wise men farting over you (snoball), Monday, 3 September 2012 08:27 (8 months ago) Permalink

...formed of all Alex James' billion children?

my god it's full of straw (White Chocolate Cheesecake), Monday, 3 September 2012 08:28 (8 months ago) Permalink

so now this is finished we can look forward to the first angry creditors by the end of the week?

boooooo he ain't hardcore (Noodle Vague), Monday, 3 September 2012 08:29 (8 months ago) Permalink

Somebody had fun writing this...
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-oxfordshire-19455856

The Britpop star, who now makes cheese,

No change there, then.

Texas due to perform on Sunday.

The true mark of a shitty 3rd tier summer festival.

What's the likelihood that every single fucking person in that picture is white? (not least because of the obscure Oxfordshire by-law which bars anyone with an amount of melanin above a certain level entering the county)

wise men farting over you (snoball), Monday, 3 September 2012 08:41 (8 months ago) Permalink


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