Horrible 70s album titles like I've Got My Own Album To Do

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REO Speedwagon - You Can Tune A Piano, But You Can't Tuna Fish or whatever the fuck that one is called
Eddie Harris - That Is Why You're Overweight

If Assholes Could Fly This Place Would Be An Airport, Saturday, 1 October 2011 03:33 (3 years ago) Permalink

those are both pretty bitchin'. try harder.

wasabi pea-sized masculinity (latebloomer), Saturday, 1 October 2011 03:44 (3 years ago) Permalink

Joe Walsh to thread.

Pleasant Plains, Saturday, 1 October 2011 04:25 (3 years ago) Permalink

Elvin Bishop: Hometown Boy Makes Good!

The Man With The Flavored Toothpick (C. Grisso/McCain), Saturday, 1 October 2011 04:35 (3 years ago) Permalink

the Harris title makes sense in context with the album art, the woman's hand holding a bon-bon or truffle or whatever

but why single out the 70's? i mean there aren't many worse album titles than say 'Dongs of Sevotion' or 'Sometimes I Wish We Were an Eagle'

Stormy Davis, Saturday, 1 October 2011 04:55 (3 years ago) Permalink

oh man prog rock totally wins this thread

Yes - Tormato
Gentle Giant - Pretentious - For the Sake of It
Caravan - If I Could Do It All Over Again, I'd Do It All Over You

geeta, Saturday, 1 October 2011 05:32 (3 years ago) Permalink

Van der Graaf Generator - The Least We Can Do Is Wave to Each Other

geeta, Saturday, 1 October 2011 05:38 (3 years ago) Permalink

Caravan also wins for 'For Girls Who Go Plump in the Night'!

Stormy Davis, Saturday, 1 October 2011 05:42 (3 years ago) Permalink

ha ha, yes!

Blind Dog at St. Dunstans was a pretty dreadful album title too

geeta, Saturday, 1 October 2011 05:47 (3 years ago) Permalink

OK, time to defend prog rock :

Van der Graaf Generator - The Least We Can Do Is Wave to Each Other is a quote from artist John Minton - "We're all awash in a sea of blood, and the least we can do is wave to each other", which isn't very quirky at all.

Gentle Giant - Pretentious - For the Sake of It. Never heard of this, probably a bootleg if it exists.

Caravan - yes awful, although I quite like the Blind Dog At St Dunstans title.

|III|||II|||I|I||| (Matt #2), Saturday, 1 October 2011 08:17 (3 years ago) Permalink

Ha yeah Joe Walsh's 'But Seriously Folks' was what immediately sprung to mind when I saw the thread title (xposts). Also:

Lowell George - Thanks, I'll Eat it Here

Gavin, Leeds, Saturday, 1 October 2011 08:26 (3 years ago) Permalink

haha i was JUST about to post the Lowell George title

some dude, Saturday, 1 October 2011 11:33 (3 years ago) Permalink

Frampton - I'm In You

Turrican, Saturday, 1 October 2011 11:43 (3 years ago) Permalink

Gentle Giant - Pretentious - For the Sake of It. Never heard of this, probably a bootleg if it exists.

It's a compilation, isn't it?

Not the 70s but it's hard to beat that run of three albums from Phil Collins: "Hello, I Must Be Going!", "No Jacket Required", "...But Seriously" ... which rips off Joe Walsh too!

Juice Should Be Sterliized (Tom D.), Saturday, 1 October 2011 12:10 (3 years ago) Permalink

Oh, that Phil Collins and his waging war on restaurants that don't let him in!

Turrican, Saturday, 1 October 2011 12:17 (3 years ago) Permalink

Think I'd refuse to pay the bill in any restaurant that let Phil Collins in

Juice Should Be Sterliized (Tom D.), Saturday, 1 October 2011 12:21 (3 years ago) Permalink

I love puns MORE than the next man but...

Juice Should Be Sterliized (Tom D.), Saturday, 1 October 2011 12:23 (3 years ago) Permalink

Hate "Crisis? What Crisis?" by Supertramp

Juice Should Be Sterliized (Tom D.), Saturday, 1 October 2011 12:26 (3 years ago) Permalink

Good lord, I never realized "Whale Meat" was a pun, I just thought it was a stupid album title.

Prostetnic Vogon Limbaugh (Dan Peterson), Saturday, 1 October 2011 12:36 (3 years ago) Permalink

Van der Graaf Generator - The Least We Can Do Is Wave to Each Other is a quote from artist John Minton - "We're all awash in a sea of blood, and the least we can do is wave to each other", which isn't very quirky at all.

We're All Awash in a Sea of Blood would have been a way better album title

geeta, Saturday, 1 October 2011 18:27 (3 years ago) Permalink

Kansas were on a roll, as Leftoverture is some painful titling, and then came Point of Know Return.

Mike Love's Jagger (Spectrist), Saturday, 1 October 2011 18:45 (3 years ago) Permalink

It is obviously a great album, but I have always hated the title 'Hall of the Mountain Grill'

master musicians of jamiroquai (NickB), Saturday, 1 October 2011 20:07 (3 years ago) Permalink

Budgie - if I were brittania I'd waive the rules

blank, Saturday, 1 October 2011 21:31 (3 years ago) Permalink

The Lowell George one is especially bad because it was also what he wanted the first Little Feat album to be called. Amazing that he held onto it for SO LONG.

cwkiii, Saturday, 1 October 2011 21:37 (3 years ago) Permalink

Sabbath's Technical Ecstacy is pretty ridiculous, especially considering the decidedly non-technical content.

Nate Carson, Saturday, 1 October 2011 21:41 (3 years ago) Permalink

per metal injection (Eazy), Saturday, 1 October 2011 21:46 (3 years ago) Permalink

Every song on D.I. Go Pop is like a horrible 70s album title.

GoshLovely, Saturday, 1 October 2011 23:36 (3 years ago) Permalink

Stretchin' Out in Bootsy's Rubber Band
Ahh... The Name Is Bootsy, Baby!
Bootsy? Player of the Year
This Boot is Made for Fonk-N

shake it, shake it, sugary pee (Tarfumes The Escape Goat), Sunday, 2 October 2011 00:00 (3 years ago) Permalink

This might be the third time in the last month I've posted this:

Josh in Chicago, Sunday, 2 October 2011 00:01 (3 years ago) Permalink

jer.fairall, Sunday, 2 October 2011 00:20 (3 years ago) Permalink

jer.fairall, Sunday, 2 October 2011 00:22 (3 years ago) Permalink

Uriah Heep - The Magician's Birthday

geeta, Sunday, 2 October 2011 03:33 (3 years ago) Permalink

I'd think Budgie's "If I Were Brittania I'd Waive the Rules" kind of fits here.

earlnash, Sunday, 2 October 2011 03:59 (3 years ago) Permalink

Fred Wesley & The Horny Horns - Say Blow By Blow Backwards
even Joe Walsh gets a headache thinking bout that one

Paul, Sunday, 2 October 2011 04:21 (3 years ago) Permalink

Jim Capaldi's "Whale Meat Again" was a protest song about the killing of Whales. (upthread)

Mark G, Monday, 3 October 2011 08:49 (3 years ago) Permalink

Makes it worse.

Naive Teen Idol, Monday, 3 October 2011 13:32 (3 years ago) Permalink

think there's a faces best-of, maybe released after the 70s but recalling its syntactic constructions, good little boys ... when they're asleep

honest weights, square dealings (schlump), Monday, 3 October 2011 13:43 (3 years ago) Permalink

This may be the best/worst:

per metal injection (Eazy), Monday, 10 October 2011 14:04 (3 years ago) Permalink

Faces - A Nod Is As Good As A Wink...To A Blind Horse

1971, so this may be the template

dismissible objects one fucks with (m coleman), Monday, 10 October 2011 14:18 (3 years ago) Permalink

Ringo Starr - Ringo's Rotogravure

OK this isn't verbose but it's one of those albums I used to stare at as a record-store clerk, thinking 'what a dumb title'

dismissible objects one fucks with (m coleman), Monday, 10 October 2011 14:20 (3 years ago) Permalink

see also Ringo The 4th - his sixth album

dismissible objects one fucks with (m coleman), Monday, 10 October 2011 14:21 (3 years ago) Permalink

Is "Sometimes I Wish we were an Eagle" a pun?

She Got the Shakes, Monday, 10 October 2011 14:51 (3 years ago) Permalink

IMO "Too Old To Rock'n'Roll, Too Young To Die" is a great title. Sums up pretty well the thoughts of the first generation who grew up with rock music, and how they dealt with not being teenagers anymore.

Hongroe (Geir Hongro), Tuesday, 11 October 2011 13:21 (3 years ago) Permalink

Man - Do You Like It here Now, Are you Settling In? and (although I kinda like this one) 2 Oz. of Plastic With A Hole In The Middle.

Prostetnic Vogon Limbaugh (Dan Peterson), Tuesday, 11 October 2011 15:06 (3 years ago) Permalink

3 months pass...

I've been thinking (for no particular reason) about lame 70s album titles recently and just found this thread.

For sheer crassness, I can't help thinking of "Fanx Ta Ra" by Sad Cafe:

Daniel Giraffe, Sunday, 22 January 2012 07:18 (2 years ago) Permalink

xp Oh I get it... "Which one's Willie." Which means no one in the band was named Willie. Quite a hoot/hollar combo.

billstevejim, Sunday, 22 January 2012 08:33 (2 years ago) Permalink

Gentle Giant - Pretentious - For the Sake of It. Never heard of this, probably a bootleg if it exists.

This definitely exists and is not a bootleg. It's a compilation but at least the title can't be blamed on the band, the liner notes say the label came up with it. Although they did apparently play gigs with a backdrop with "PRETENTIOUS" in big letters above them.

The Eyeball Of Hull (Colonel Poo), Sunday, 22 January 2012 12:42 (2 years ago) Permalink

greg kihn to thread, surely

scream blahula scream (govern yourself accordingly), Sunday, 22 January 2012 14:22 (2 years ago) Permalink

(i realize it's hardly in the true caravan spirit, but 1978's "next of kihn" would have been a prime offender even if he hadn't gone back to the well a dozen times)

scream blahula scream (govern yourself accordingly), Sunday, 22 January 2012 14:25 (2 years ago) Permalink

Doobie Brothers - What Were Once Vices Are Now Habits

Mr. Snrub, Sunday, 22 January 2012 16:39 (2 years ago) Permalink

... but does in no way excuse it.

... and a Martin Parr photo essay (Tom D.), Wednesday, 22 October 2014 17:33 (1 week ago) Permalink

'eads

Master of Treacle, Wednesday, 22 October 2014 17:55 (1 week ago) Permalink

i keep walking past the bus stop near where im staying and it says "both sides of the road" and it makes me think of this thread

anvil, Wednesday, 22 October 2014 18:07 (1 week ago) Permalink

so i looked on discogs and it listed no records called that, apart from one called corpses on both sides of the road, by some people called
endometrium cuntplow

anvil, Wednesday, 22 October 2014 18:09 (1 week ago) Permalink

Have: 4
Want: 2
Avg Rating: 5.0 / 5
Ratings: 2
Last Sold: Never
Lowest: --
Median: --
Highest: --

anvil, Wednesday, 22 October 2014 18:09 (1 week ago) Permalink

endometrium cuntplow

dying

Doctor Casino, Wednesday, 22 October 2014 18:10 (1 week ago) Permalink

Horrible 70s band names like endometrium cuntplow

Don A Henley And Get Over It (C. Grisso/McCain), Wednesday, 22 October 2014 20:21 (1 week ago) Permalink

Has this been mentioned yet, or is it too obvious?

mahb, Thursday, 23 October 2014 08:01 (1 week ago) Permalink

lonely guy just thinking baout things

bizarro gazzara, Thursday, 23 October 2014 12:13 (1 week ago) Permalink

^ otm. I know we've moved on from the albums actually being horrible but nothing about that album is horrible!

... and a Martin Parr photo essay (Tom D.), Thursday, 23 October 2014 12:24 (1 week ago) Permalink

Also in general I have grown to love these titles so much

u2 removal machine (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Thursday, 23 October 2014 13:41 (1 week ago) Permalink

every time this thread is bumped I think 'that must be all of them', but there seems to be an infinite number of these records

soref, Thursday, 23 October 2014 13:44 (1 week ago) Permalink

Jojo Gunne made a career of these: two of their other titles were Bite Down Hard and So...Where's The Show?.

Don A Henley And Get Over It (C. Grisso/McCain), Thursday, 23 October 2014 14:00 (1 week ago) Permalink

xpost I really hope there's an infinite amount

you walk on the street, grab the rock (President Keyes), Thursday, 23 October 2014 14:31 (1 week ago) Permalink

But i will pretty much listen to any album released in the 1970s

you walk on the street, grab the rock (President Keyes), Thursday, 23 October 2014 14:31 (1 week ago) Permalink

This is basically one of these, right?

Doctor Casino, Thursday, 23 October 2014 18:30 (1 week ago) Permalink

though really "Instant Karma" and "Mother" there kinda beg to be album covers on their own. "Cold Turkey" a sad missed opportunity.

Doctor Casino, Thursday, 23 October 2014 18:32 (1 week ago) Permalink

Some 70s guys just didn't hit their stride until the 80s:

Gotta say these dudes seem spectacularly lucky to have scored a latter-day hit with "You Can Do Magic" - until I remembered that I was kind of baffled to imagine that someone actually greenlit four albums of America as a duo post-1980.

Doctor Casino, Thursday, 23 October 2014 21:13 (1 week ago) Permalink

wow those are all great

u2 removal machine (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Thursday, 23 October 2014 21:32 (1 week ago) Permalink

That middle one reminded me of this...

john wahey (NickB), Thursday, 23 October 2014 21:36 (1 week ago) Permalink

seems like we've moved on to "head-shakingly literal record cover depictions of the title"...which is I guess a big part of the records on this thread so far.

Dokken played here for a Ribfest and people were total assholes (Sparkle Motion), Thursday, 23 October 2014 21:37 (1 week ago) Permalink

lotta overlap, but basically "awkwardly conveys agreeable inessentiality" is my main criterion here.

Doctor Casino, Thursday, 23 October 2014 21:40 (1 week ago) Permalink

absolutely

Dokken played here for a Ribfest and people were total assholes (Sparkle Motion), Thursday, 23 October 2014 21:41 (1 week ago) Permalink

inessential

Dokken played here for a Ribfest and people were total assholes (Sparkle Motion), Thursday, 23 October 2014 21:41 (1 week ago) Permalink

soref, Thursday, 23 October 2014 21:50 (1 week ago) Permalink

'Rise and Shine' by Kokomo seems to have an alternate cover as well?

soref, Thursday, 23 October 2014 21:52 (1 week ago) Permalink

no thanks

Doctor Casino, Thursday, 23 October 2014 21:55 (1 week ago) Permalink

wow, these guys

Doctor Casino, Thursday, 23 October 2014 21:57 (1 week ago) Permalink

Nazareth - Close Enough For Rock'N'Roll

john wahey (NickB), Thursday, 23 October 2014 21:58 (1 week ago) Permalink

"Rise and Shine," the train one, just gets better the more I look at it.

Doctor Casino, Thursday, 23 October 2014 21:59 (1 week ago) Permalink

Fumble - Poetry In Lotion

john wahey (NickB), Thursday, 23 October 2014 22:01 (1 week ago) Permalink

banal phrase + vaguely 'clever', ironic representation of the above + ambience of good-natured frolicsome sauciness was the litmus test I was trying to apply

soref, Thursday, 23 October 2014 22:03 (1 week ago) Permalink

Bunk Dogger - First Offence

sorry, hammering the hipgnosis a bit here

john wahey (NickB), Thursday, 23 October 2014 22:05 (1 week ago) Permalink

nah, you're killing it today IMO!

Listening to Dr. Hook's hits now. I knew the (sublime) "When You're In Love With A Beautiful Woman" but there's some other good stuff... "You Make My Pants Wanna Get Up And Dance" is exactly the kind of good-times middling hit (or non-hit) that I expect to find anchoring one of these albums.

Doctor Casino, Thursday, 23 October 2014 22:09 (1 week ago) Permalink

man bunk dogger that one is amazing

u2 removal machine (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Thursday, 23 October 2014 22:12 (1 week ago) Permalink

what does "bunk dogger" mean, is that UK slang?

u2 removal machine (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Thursday, 23 October 2014 22:12 (1 week ago) Permalink

it was the guy's name I think!

john wahey (NickB), Thursday, 23 October 2014 22:14 (1 week ago) Permalink

it sounds like it ought to mean something though

john wahey (NickB), Thursday, 23 October 2014 22:15 (1 week ago) Permalink

Someone who dogs bunks, clearly.

emil.y, Thursday, 23 October 2014 22:16 (1 week ago) Permalink

damn, obvious really!

john wahey (NickB), Thursday, 23 October 2014 22:17 (1 week ago) Permalink

soref, Thursday, 23 October 2014 22:20 (1 week ago) Permalink

soref, Thursday, 23 October 2014 22:36 (1 week ago) Permalink

"time for another" is such a perfect second album title for this thread

anonanon, Thursday, 23 October 2014 22:41 (1 week ago) Permalink

Another winner from Nazareth (from 1984):

Humorist (horse) (誤訳侮辱), Friday, 24 October 2014 01:10 (1 week ago) Permalink

this thread's really stepped it up today, good work all

Free Me's Electric Trumpet (Moodles), Friday, 24 October 2014 01:32 (1 week ago) Permalink

A power trio album from 1981: Jack Bruce, Bill Lordan (former Sly and the Family Stone drummer) and Robin Trower:

Humorist (horse) (誤訳侮辱), Sunday, 26 October 2014 01:56 (5 days ago) Permalink

There should be one of these called "Welp, Let's Get This Over With"

my jaw left (Hurting 2), Sunday, 26 October 2014 02:07 (5 days ago) Permalink

"Two More Of These And We're Out Of Our Contract"

my jaw left (Hurting 2), Sunday, 26 October 2014 02:07 (5 days ago) Permalink

not seeing horse's image :(

Doctor Casino, Sunday, 26 October 2014 02:42 (5 days ago) Permalink

On the Jack Bruce tip, check out these initial offerings from his lyricist Pete Brown

A Meal You Can Shake Hands with in the Dark

Full title: Things May Come and Things May Go But the Art School Dance Goes on Forever

Don A Henley And Get Over It (C. Grisso/McCain), Sunday, 26 October 2014 03:25 (5 days ago) Permalink


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