pitchfork is dumb (#34985859340293849494 in a series.)

lmao

hay guys conservatives and ed sheeran fans have feelings too

why wasn't chaki's milquetoast zing preserved solely for you I ask

you useless dullard fuck, when will you fuck off forever

― an uptempo Pop/Hip Hop mentality (imago), Friday, March 10, 2017 10:21 AM (two minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

can u just go write another shitty epic novel or something?

at least that would constitute some sort of artistic achievement

Does it matter what you say if you play shoegaze? I'm too dull to make poetry, looking for a loophole here.

you're a fucking plague on interesting discourse. good day

shitting in the corner of an empty room counts as a artistic achievement in certain cases

wait was that last part to me? Because I knew that already.

nah flops and lj are working something out i guess

can you find some other precocious 16 year olds to talk at? sure they would be much more impressed

didn't read review, but what would you actually say about Ed Sheeran music other than it is bland and utterly without character? You could take out his vocal, and insert one of 100,000 aspiring pop singers, male or female, and use the tracks as demos to shop. And probably not get signed, because 99,999 other people are doing the exact same thing.

― Dominique, Friday, March 10, 2017 9:29 AM (one hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Pitchfork even reviewing this shit over countless other deserving obscurities it'll never touch is the true atrocity here

― an uptempo Pop/Hip Hop mentality (imago), Friday, March 10, 2017 10:19 AM (twenty-nine minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i'm no sheeran stan, but these opinions are both bad

Is Dominique specifically referring to those out there that consider American Idol the best way to objectively measure one's quality as a musician? I assume there are a lot of people like that. Is that wrong of me?

xp
nevertheless, it is my opinion. There are doubtlessly lots of ways to write in an interesting way about music that I find bland, though life is too short for me to do more than post on ILM. Were someone to pay me enough to write about my thoughts on Ed Sheeran, it would be hard not to focus on the lack of music character.

I'm not actually referring to anyone in particular -- except that there are at least that number of aspiring pop performers who would love to have an opportunity like Ed Sheeran. Make no mistake, I believe there is a way to be him, and make music that I like/find interesting. What I've heard isn't it.

itt: performative mapping of world ES represents, invokes

pitchfork publishing an earnest takedown of ed sheeran feels like something from the early 00s era

like why bother?

reviews with a score of 2.8 get clicks and shares

RIP pitchfork

what did pitchfork do to suddenly get super super fast pageloads

iirc sacrificial ceremony

You installed an adblocker?

who knows everything seems very fast today, maybe i should sit down

the singularity is approaching

i am/we are pitchfork

what did pitchfork do to suddenly get super super fast pageloads

― j., Friday, March 10, 2017 8:47 AM (four hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

deleted obscure_bands database ie pages accessed < 4k x/month

they got a hemi

Pitchfork pans the new Ed Sheeran album but spends the entire review talking only about the lyrics. Like, who the hell listens to music for the lyrics?!

a) me
b) most of ed sheeran's fans
c) most fans of singer-songwriter types in general, which is Sheeran's selling point
d) this is a bad take

I thought it was a joke post. It's not?

Mr. Snrub is an enigma tbh

an enigma wrapped in a puzzle I've seen dozens of times

when did lengthy discussions about a snrub take begin? ilx continues to surprise me

am I supposed to know who snrub is

what did pitchfork do to suddenly get super super fast pageloads

― j., Friday, March 10, 2017 8:47 AM (four hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

dat xfinity ad $$$$$

I know little about Snrub except that he's got access to LeBron's inner circle.

an enigma wrapped in a puzzle I've seen dozens of times

― a self-reinforcing downward spiral of male-centric indie (katherine), Friday, March 10, 2017 4:34 PM (twenty-three minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

this is a good zing

not singling anyone out, katherine, this is a collective failure imo

snrub's one of those types who's easy to find online but isn't the sort you'd expect to hang around ILX for a decade.

Aren't we all though tbf

Though maybe I'm shortchanging snrub, I also would have pegged him as a Ke$ha stan.

Wouldn't

Xxxpost, Katherine I've never been sure if snrub was a long running bit by a regular using an alt acct

Of course lyrics are important. But the review made it seem like lyrics were the only bad thing about the album.

lyrics are important most so far as they contain syllables with song-condusive vocal sounds

This Is What You Get: An Oral History of Radiohead’s “Karma Police” Video

What It Felt Like When OK Computer Came Out
sponsored by MailChimp

it was the fittest of times, it was the happiest of times

Thom Yorke bursting into tears over MTV's support for the band is hilarious. Tears sponsored by MailChimp, natch.

xp lmao

I haven't actually read the Karma Police article. I just thought the title was funny, as if Pitchfork is angrily punishing us with an oral history of Radiohead's Karma Police video.

ahahahahaha https://twitter.com/clickhole/status/844270728988033024