JESUS CHRIST...MANCHESTER...

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This whole thing isn't that surprising though. Manchester's Old Guard are little more than jokes, morons and tribute acts anyway. It takes something like this to wash all the scum away, etc etc.

I will take ye several pictures when the time comes.

making some spurious justification via bach completely sums up the head-up-arseness of this city.

Could this possibly be that Stone Roses one that goes on for a bit and kicks off at the end? I'm just stabbing in the dark here...

roffle
it's like something a fourth-year drama class would come up with, no? I expect ILM could write something better in its lunch hour.

But I'll still turn out to watch it.

xpost

look, I'm totally being disingenuous but still, it wouldn't hurt of journalists found ways to essentially say "this is actually not a joke" within such articles. How very fucking clever of them to play neutral all of a sudden when the whole thing clearly reads like an stupid prank to everyone or at least raises a few legitimate questions. But no, aren't we all smart and professional all of a sudden.

All the other Manc bores who take their music and themselves and their beards very seriously indeed: Andy Votel, Mr Scruff, Elbow, The Doves, New Order, Oasis, et al, mustn't be as hard-up as Bez, Brown & co.

But really, this is a joke isn't it? Isn't it?

Or that web page is a perfect hack and will be taken down shortly. Who can you trust since the advent of you know, photography and stuff.

The BBC is recruiting pop performers from groups such as the Stone Roses and Happy Mondays to play Jesus, the disciples, the Virgin Mary and Pontius Pilate.

Bez, a former tamborine-bashing member of the Happy Mondays and a winner of Celebrity Big Brother, is expected to be one of the disciples, but the BBC said that it was too early to announce other names.

The drama, called the Manchester Passion, will begin with the performers playing Jesus and the disciples, dressed in contemporary clothes, at the Last Supper, sitting on a wall in a Manchester street.

Much of the action is expected to take place near Manchester's gay and red light area close to Canal Street as the group "process" towards Albert Square in the city centre.

During the Last Supper, the character playing Jesus will sing Joy Division's Love Will Tear Us Apart.

Meanwhile, the Judas figure, knowing he is about to betray Jesus, sings the downbeat anthem by The Smiths, Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now.

In the Garden of Gesthemene, which will take place in a Manchester park, Jesus sings Sit Down by James as he prays alone, and then duets with Judas - Blue Monday by New Order - as he is arrested by performers dressed as police officers.

As the group converges on Albert Square in the centre of the city, a separate crowd of people carrying a 25ft-long, white cross will arrive from the other side of the city.

The trial of Jesus by Pontius Pilate will be accompanied by the singing of Wonderwall by Oasis, the chorus of which goes:
"I said maybe
You're gonna be the one who saves me?
And after all
You're my wonderwall."

The Virgin Mary will express her emotions at the foot of the cross in the song Search For the Hero by M People, which featured in a recent car advertisement.

At the climax of the programme, the resurrected Christ will appear on the roof of Manchester town hall and, if the draft script is followed, will belt out a reprise of Wonderwall.

belter.

And, yes, Depeche Mode performing "Personal Jesus".

http://www.bbc.co.uk/bbcthree/imagedump/13248.jpg

"What a shame Rufus Wainwright and Jeff Buckley weren't from Manchester because we could have used a few of their songs!"

I mean, what can you say. Except DIE DIE DIE.

Ian Broudie is fucking bollox personified, is he a Manc?

Scouse?

oh god yeah

tried to think if any of these retards took a single thing from the smiths, best i could come up with was the jangly guitar sound

even back then if you mentioned Northside everyone sniggered but if anyone says now "Northside weren't that bad" either nostalgia is an evil that we need to get rid of or modern brit indie is so bad that it makes Northside look not bad.

Marr's guitar playing, which was v. innovative and rightly recognised as such, has been one of the greatest forces for evil in British music of the last 20 years. Including in the hands of J. Marr post-Smiths.

I met the bassist from Intastella in a pub recently. Quite a sad experience.

On the plus side, I can't see them reforming any time soon.

thought about liverpool and whether to do a general 'come friendly bombs and rain on every lancs settlement large enough to contain a branch of superdrug'

liverpool seems superficially different, but really it's narc of sd in the extreme....it's a bit more fey, psych, 'zany' rather than 'quirky'....but since they'd probably hate to be lumped in with the manchester fucks, i'd say it's pretty important we conflate them itt

Saw P4ul Ryd3r in Dry one time not long after the Mondays split, that was a pretty sad experience.

obv my definitive take on Liverpool musicians is already another thread but gosh darn it for a mad and exciting city its mad and exciting bands sure are fucking boring. and Julian Cope's from Tamworth

why no anti-london thread?

beneath contempt, not really a place

but tbf a lot less indie-boreathon than the NW and environs

how about west midlands towns that aren't as good as Birmingham?

Was anyone at this?

In March 1991, NME reported that Northside were appearing at the 'Great Indie Festival - A Midsummer's Day Dream' at Milton Keynes Bowl in June that year. Also on the bill were 808 State, Gary Clail, New Fast Automatic Daffodils, The Shamen, Shades of Rhythm plus Flowered Up.[1]

there's probably a million anti london threads, most of my contempt recently has been for the post jack penate rah rah schindie dogcum of recent years, partly cuz it's notably vile but also cuz i actually encounter these retards irl

as a place tho, london is too diverse to be hated in singularity like liverchester, and there are always good mp3s from london amidst the crap

good records from liverchester are pretty rare

why you trying to make me so miserable abt living in Mcr, ffs :(

nah i'm just asking u to become the manc varg vikerness

yeah but you're a londoner!
xps

dude sorry not really down on the city tho yr pubs are often too far apart and some bastard bulldozed Tommy Ducks and the big city shops suck balls quite a bit and the Pancake House closed as well :(

there are good things still tho i guess

I have seen the Manc Varg Vikerness and his name is...Guy Garvey.

Cornerhouse, that's a good thing. seem to recall some dece pubs round there too. Science Museum was fantastic last time I checked.

there's probably some cavilling to be had abt middle class london ppl h8ing on other parts of the country, but srsly fuck that

evil is evil whether or not it has a cse in media studies or a photo with the bullingdon club

altho Liverpool's World museum is fucking amazing and blows most things away

Yeah pancake house RIP. I really like living here but tbh if people say 'what should we do on a visit to Mcr' then I'm kinda stumped.

i've never been to 'mcr' but i'd guess there are good things there, and there's plenty of cash in the suburbs and cheshire so it's not like i'm h8ing on mogadishu and its terrible indie scene

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ku3g9xPCs0M

=

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ClcwKgxu2wk

there's 2 threads of mancs hating on a whole country so i dont think anyones gonna judge you nakh on hating the whole aura of manchester thing

i mean imma prob vote for mumfords in the landfill thread, i'm not sure i'd even have any liverchester filth in my top 3 or 4 contenders either

they're shit even at being shit

http://i.imgur.com/87Uni.jpg

Cheshire, culturally speaking, wants fuck all to do with Manchester (and vice versa).

And any connection Cheshire has with Manchester is with south Manchester, which has much less to do with the Manchester you are lamenting here, I think.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U1842QnWpqY&feature=related

from about 3 minutes on. what a great bloke Browny really is. looking for that dope-addled interview where he'd been listening to too much Capleton and started calling for dem battymen to be bunned.

isn't south manchester the more middle class bit.....and some areas to the north, whereas inner manchester is mostly poor?

where do most of the shit bands come from

Runcorn

stone roses first album is probably the last thing in the manc indie canon that doesn't need to be destroyed

i'll rep for Yes Please, don't really care for the Roses but I guess that first album gave us "Tunes Splits the Atom" so it's not all bad.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t9kGItHdEYU

much better with them bleep bloops all over it

fuck I looked like Tunes in 1990, them round sunglasses were all the go

A guy called gerald + probably other great early 90s dance music that I don't know about probably puts Manchester on a level with Sheffield (stuff of that period). The dance music scene is alright, I prefer it to Leeds. I like Trus'me.

S Manchester = middle class (inc all the uni students). Current musical output: dull indiepop

Yer shit Manc indie bands are from the inner manchester or, more likely, northern outskirts like Oldham.

South Manchester is not really representative of the city as a whole and has more in common with London/SE England than it does with East Manchester.

(I am a middle class Manchester uni graduate so obv live in south suburbs)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-X5ekIFIazg&feature=related

INDIE CLUB

I agree it's time ILM had an anti-sheffield thread!

this is going to be the last h8fest i'm engaging in for a while, cuz between the theory bloggahs, the illiterate sportswriters, the deviantart nudniks and the landfill reets i've been keeping it negative in a not altogether healthy way this week

n e wayz to summarize, i can understand why an area that did see a lot of interesting stuff 25 yrs go would want to nurture some sort of heritage industry, tho the ubiquity of lecherous senile cunts like peter hook makes it seem pretty risible

however, whilst nobody would mistake the relics of the uk's industrial past for actual productive capacity, there seems to be a mistaken belief that former greatness in cultural fields persists beyond its very obvious death

this supposed aura is in actuality the grim spectre of endogamy and ancestor worship, an autophagic freakshow without end

sing that last line to yourself in the style of ian curtis

nah, 'senile cunts' and 'autophagic freakshow' in the same song could only be sung by MES, but i don't think he needs to outsource his lyrics

http://fuc51.blogspot.com/

BY THE SEA...IS OVERRATED!!...

It felt more like 2 1/2 hours than Silence did.