pitchfork is dumb (#34985859340293849494 in a series.)

the singularity is approaching

i am/we are pitchfork

what did pitchfork do to suddenly get super super fast pageloads

― j., Friday, March 10, 2017 8:47 AM (four hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

deleted obscure_bands database ie pages accessed < 4k x/month

they got a hemi

Pitchfork pans the new Ed Sheeran album but spends the entire review talking only about the lyrics. Like, who the hell listens to music for the lyrics?!

a) me
b) most of ed sheeran's fans
c) most fans of singer-songwriter types in general, which is Sheeran's selling point
d) this is a bad take

I thought it was a joke post. It's not?

Mr. Snrub is an enigma tbh

an enigma wrapped in a puzzle I've seen dozens of times

when did lengthy discussions about a snrub take begin? ilx continues to surprise me

am I supposed to know who snrub is

what did pitchfork do to suddenly get super super fast pageloads

― j., Friday, March 10, 2017 8:47 AM (four hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

dat xfinity ad $$$$$

I know little about Snrub except that he's got access to LeBron's inner circle.

an enigma wrapped in a puzzle I've seen dozens of times

― a self-reinforcing downward spiral of male-centric indie (katherine), Friday, March 10, 2017 4:34 PM (twenty-three minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

this is a good zing

not singling anyone out, katherine, this is a collective failure imo

snrub's one of those types who's easy to find online but isn't the sort you'd expect to hang around ILX for a decade.

Aren't we all though tbf

Though maybe I'm shortchanging snrub, I also would have pegged him as a Ke$ha stan.

Wouldn't

Xxxpost, Katherine I've never been sure if snrub was a long running bit by a regular using an alt acct

Of course lyrics are important. But the review made it seem like lyrics were the only bad thing about the album.

lyrics are important most so far as they contain syllables with song-condusive vocal sounds

This Is What You Get: An Oral History of Radiohead’s “Karma Police” Video

What It Felt Like When OK Computer Came Out
sponsored by MailChimp

it was the fittest of times, it was the happiest of times

Thom Yorke bursting into tears over MTV's support for the band is hilarious. Tears sponsored by MailChimp, natch.

xp lmao

I haven't actually read the Karma Police article. I just thought the title was funny, as if Pitchfork is angrily punishing us with an oral history of Radiohead's Karma Police video.

ahahahahaha https://twitter.com/clickhole/status/844270728988033024

A fabulous crime is that I actually swallow my gum all the time.

'gum is the impossible meal' is just about the perfect clickhole sentence

Thom Yorke: I came up with the title of the album on the spot. It’s the moment when you give a computer a guitar and say, “Okay, computer…let’s see what you got! Show us your stuff!”

What The Hell Are You Doing Here? You Don't Belong Here: An Oral History of Pablo Honey

the "karma police" oral history is actually kinda interesting

also would rather eat a nine day-old Whopper sat on by Baron Harkonnen than be forced to read Sir Elton interviewing Misty Joe Fuckface

it was the fittest of times, it was the happiest of times

― tylerw, Tuesday, March 21, 2017 6:57 PM (one hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

<333

also would rather eat a nine day-old Whopper sat on by Baron Harkonnen than be forced to read Sir Elton interviewing Misty Joe Fuckface

An understated reaction there, really.

Separately, missing a Snrub beef is something I am glad of.

the "karma police" oral history is actually kinda interesting

― the raindrops and drop tops of lived, earned experience (BradNelson), Tuesday, March 21, 2017 4:34 PM (thirteen minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

This post brought to you by MailChimp.

@pitchfork Catch @TheMagFields founder, Stephin Merritt, in conversation at @MCAchicago April 18—supported by @MailChimp… https://t.co/tL0UUdEXMi

Stephen 'MailChimp' Merritt

Misty Joe Fuckface

keeper

The only accurate description of that...that thing.

that oral history was really good actually

Their factually inaccurate Adult. blurb bugged me:

"On their first album in six years, the married electro duo curate a highly collaborative record that is richer and stranger than anything they've done before. It's unusually electrifying."

(Their last one came out in 2013. 🤦‍♂️)

ewwwww their twitter bio is 'the most trusted voice in music' fuck these utter jerks forever

it's their slogan

well obviously now i'm reading the recent phil elverum profile/interview/story thing and regretting saying that, dammit pitchfork why you have to be good sometimes

Who died, and who did the killing?

That’s the central mystery of “Big Little Lies,” HBO’s limited series based on Liane Moriarty’s novel of the same name. But like the book, the show does not bask in that single question. It asks so, so many. Like, why does Madeline (Reese Witherspoon) drive a Buick?

http://pitchfork.com/thepitch/1471-how-does-the-first-grader-on-big-little-lies-have-such-killer-music-taste/?mbid=homepage-more-latest-and-video

Chloe’s taste in music is not a minor aspect of her character—it defines her. We’re supposed to recognize that early on in the show, when she says to classmate Ziggy (Iain Armitage), “When I grow up, I want to run a massive label.” This girl is a mogul in the making. She’s not thinking of limited runs of hissing cassettes—she’s dreaming of Grammys. Hell, she’s wearing Apple earbuds around her neck in numerous scenes, including the opening credits.

hell, she's wearing EARBUDS. she likes music so much she is WEARING EARBUDS!!!!

that oral history was really good actually

― flappy bird, Tuesday, March 21, 2017 2:14 PM (yesterday)

i tried to read it but got bugged early on by the author's claim that the video starts "in media res". it starts with a frigging still shot of the (motionless) car's (empty) back seat.

How Does the First-Grader on ‘Big Little Lies’ Have Such Killer Music Taste?

And how did that Doogie Howser blaze through medical school so fast??!

all this ok computer 20 year trash .... zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz