pitchfork is dumb (#34985859340293849494 in a series.)

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it's almost like Jim Beam came to them and said "we have X amount of dollars what could we do" and then they came up with this idea and now people in New York can see a Majical Cloudz show

whatchutola khomeini (Whiney G. Weingarten), Tuesday, 29 April 2014 21:00 (ten years ago) link

Assuming it's not JUST them booking bands for random venues, I don't even know what it is at all before I can mock it.

Evan, Tuesday, 29 April 2014 21:01 (ten years ago) link

its an advertising partnership. they're just booking shows, but jim beam pays for it

whatchutola khomeini (Whiney G. Weingarten), Tuesday, 29 April 2014 21:02 (ten years ago) link

it sounds like it's just them booking bands at random venues

sarahell, Tuesday, 29 April 2014 21:03 (ten years ago) link

and it's called "nightcap" because it's sponsored by an alcoholic beverage company

sarahell, Tuesday, 29 April 2014 21:04 (ten years ago) link

it's not very interesting or imaginative but it could be worse -- there could be dumb fake mustaches or they could have spelled it "nightc@p" or started an aggressive hashtag branding campaign

sarahell, Tuesday, 29 April 2014 21:08 (ten years ago) link

why are we discussing this

sitting on a claud all day gotta make your butt numb (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 29 April 2014 21:10 (ten years ago) link

i'm not trying to be snide, i'm just curious
is the presumption that the pitchfork name means it deserves scrutiny/ridicule?

sitting on a claud all day gotta make your butt numb (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 29 April 2014 21:11 (ten years ago) link

Adam Bruneau otm

mattresslessness, Tuesday, 29 April 2014 21:17 (ten years ago) link

how are there 20+ posts on this

le goon (J0rdan S.), Tuesday, 29 April 2014 21:20 (ten years ago) link

how is anybody surprised that ilm is discussing this

marcos, Tuesday, 29 April 2014 21:20 (ten years ago) link

I was gonna come on here earlier to make fun of their constant mining of every little thing that happens between Drake vs. Jay-Z for front page news but forgot to.

▴▲ ▴TH3CR()$BY$H()W▴▲ ▴ (Adam Bruneau), Tuesday, 29 April 2014 21:20 (ten years ago) link

the thread title is pitchfork is dumb (#34985859340293849494 in a series.) and was started 12 years ago

marcos, Tuesday, 29 April 2014 21:21 (ten years ago) link

Last week one of the headline news stories was "Drake uses lint roller on his pants at basketball game".

▴▲ ▴TH3CR()$BY$H()W▴▲ ▴ (Adam Bruneau), Tuesday, 29 April 2014 21:21 (ten years ago) link

ISn't this just what Red Bull have been doing for a while now? Only with booze and a Pitchfork imprimatur?

EZ Snappin, Tuesday, 29 April 2014 21:21 (ten years ago) link

Except the Red Bull shows are cheap.

EZ Snappin, Tuesday, 29 April 2014 21:22 (ten years ago) link

it's almost like Jim Beam came to them and said "we have X amount of dollars what could we do" and then they came up with this idea and now people in New York can see a Majical Cloudz show

― whatchutola khomeini (Whiney G. Weingarten), Tuesday, April 29, 2014 5:00 PM (21 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

whatchutola khomeini (Whiney G. Weingarten), Tuesday, 29 April 2014 21:22 (ten years ago) link

Last week one of the headline news stories was "Drake uses lint roller on his pants at basketball game".

― ▴▲ ▴TH3CR()$BY$H()W▴▲ ▴ (Adam Bruneau), Tuesday, April 29, 2014 5:21 PM (9 minutes ago) Bookmark

this is a hilarious story, what is wrong with you people

le goon (J0rdan S.), Tuesday, 29 April 2014 21:30 (ten years ago) link

heaven forbid a music news section tries to have fun

le goon (J0rdan S.), Tuesday, 29 April 2014 21:32 (ten years ago) link

what ever will happen to serious news stories such as "here is another arcade fire song"

le goon (J0rdan S.), Tuesday, 29 April 2014 21:33 (ten years ago) link

people gotta know if arcade fire suddenly covers king crimson or Louis Jordan

christmas candy bar (al leong), Tuesday, 29 April 2014 21:36 (ten years ago) link

Yeah i'm tired of the "Arcade Fire Covers ______" too. Basically i would just eliminate their entire news section.

▴▲ ▴TH3CR()$BY$H()W▴▲ ▴ (Adam Bruneau), Tuesday, 29 April 2014 21:40 (ten years ago) link

besides drake and arcade fire is st. vincent the most ubiquitous person on the site? feels like it to me.

marcos, Tuesday, 29 April 2014 21:41 (ten years ago) link

Last week one of the headline news stories was "Drake uses lint roller on his pants at basketball game".

― ▴▲ ▴TH3CR()$BY$H()W▴▲ ▴ (Adam Bruneau), Tuesday, April 29, 2014 5:21 PM (9 minutes ago) Bookmark

They should go back to when they were covering indie music

Evan, Tuesday, 29 April 2014 21:50 (ten years ago) link

i'm starting a series of superb shows that will happen at supper. so grab a slice of papa john's and check out Supperb this summer.

the glimmer man (Sufjan Grafton), Tuesday, 29 April 2014 21:59 (ten years ago) link

I guess it's somewhat like "An Evening with Led Zeppelin" or whatever.

▴▲ ▴TH3CR()$BY$H()W▴▲ ▴ (Adam Bruneau), Tuesday, 29 April 2014 22:44 (ten years ago) link

^^ significant lol (xpost)

alpine static, Tuesday, 29 April 2014 22:45 (ten years ago) link

Last week one of the headline news stories was "Drake uses lint roller on his pants at basketball game".

― ▴▲ ▴TH3CR()$BY$H()W▴▲ ▴ (Adam Bruneau), Tuesday, April 29, 2014 5:21 PM (9 minutes ago) Bookmark

this was the best news story i'd seen in forever! though i love hoops scooped them

dollar rave club (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Tuesday, 29 April 2014 22:47 (ten years ago) link

That Deerhunter shit thing is really an ultimate trump card. Can't argue w that.

▴▲ ▴TH3CR()$BY$H()W▴▲ ▴ (Adam Bruneau), Tuesday, 29 April 2014 22:48 (ten years ago) link

sometimes i think drake couldn't be more drake than he already is, but then he does something like lint rolls his pants courtside at a basketball game! can you even appreciate that? that a human being could actually think to bring a lint roller to a sports event? and then use it courtside?

he's the G.O.A.T. at being drake

dollar rave club (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Tuesday, 29 April 2014 22:49 (ten years ago) link

I don't understand, is his car filled with cats or something?

▴▲ ▴TH3CR()$BY$H()W▴▲ ▴ (Adam Bruneau), Tuesday, 29 April 2014 22:53 (ten years ago) link

"Girl let me get all up on them pants... LINT ROLLER"

djenter the dragon? (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Tuesday, 29 April 2014 23:09 (ten years ago) link

The lint roller story got me to check pitchfork for the first time in about ten years

badg, Wednesday, 30 April 2014 02:11 (ten years ago) link

I was hoping that all five of today's reviews would use the word "workmanlike", but it turned out to be only Guided By Voices and the Black Keys.

how's life, Tuesday, 13 May 2014 17:10 (ten years ago) link

but the Black Keys review did use "farty synths"!

djenter the dragon? (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Tuesday, 13 May 2014 17:11 (ten years ago) link

that black keys review was terrible, i'm getting super tired of all the cloying attempted witticisms and constant linking to extraneous or tangential internet phenomena.

marcos, Tuesday, 13 May 2014 17:13 (ten years ago) link

yeah, i'm no Black Keys stan by any means, but that was terrible.

djenter the dragon? (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Tuesday, 13 May 2014 17:15 (ten years ago) link

Heh. Yup. Other farty entries on Pitchfork include:

*Her voice-- passive, girlish-- sounds lost against the farty and broken-down guitars
*Its rollercoaster companion, "Yoshimi (Part 2)," scales a slinky, ascending wall of farty synth and distant Japanese babble before the bottom
*The pressure here builds and builds, but rather than taking flight, tracks like "De Javu" struggle with a misdirected explosion of percussion that flattens out into a farty bass riff smothered in layers of percussion.

AND a GbV review from two years ago!

*The farty flute kickoff to "Doughnut for a Snowman" nods to those sputtering constructions of old, but it feels a bit perfunctory, a sound effect where a fleck of dumbass brilliance like Alien Lanes' "Hit" might've otherwise gone.

how's life, Tuesday, 13 May 2014 17:15 (ten years ago) link

all five of today's reviews would use the word "workmanlike"

bands are lazy, I respect labor tbh

Οὖτις, Tuesday, 13 May 2014 17:17 (ten years ago) link

*Many of her tracks sound similar to one another: A 505 Groovebox queefs out splatty, farty beats and M.I.A. shouts lyrics of varying snark over them, sometimes even singing them.

how's life, Tuesday, 13 May 2014 17:19 (ten years ago) link

A 505 Groovebox queefs out splatty, farty beats

lmfartyao

purposely lend impetus to my HOOS (BIG HOOS aka the steendriver), Tuesday, 13 May 2014 17:26 (ten years ago) link

I mistakenly ready that as: "A 505 Groovebox queefs out splatty, farty beefs"

Evan, Tuesday, 13 May 2014 18:11 (ten years ago) link

I didn't think that sentence could get worse.

how's life, Tuesday, 13 May 2014 18:27 (ten years ago) link

pitchfork coppin GOW*'s style

*Good Ol Waterface

famous instagram God (waterface), Tuesday, 13 May 2014 18:31 (ten years ago) link

queefs out splatty, farty beefs queefs out splatty, farty beefs queefs out splatty, farty beefs queefs out splatty, farty beefs queefs out splatty, farty beefs queefs out splatty, farty beefs queefs out splatty, farty beefs queefs out splatty, farty beefs queefs out splatty, farty beefs

marcos, Tuesday, 13 May 2014 19:12 (ten years ago) link

wait someone wrote "queefs out splatty, farty beats" in a record review on p4k? is that true??

alpine static, Tuesday, 13 May 2014 19:51 (ten years ago) link

all i wanna do is *QUEEF QUEEF QUEEF QUEEF*

and *splat* *fart*

and take your money

Stupor Fly, Tuesday, 13 May 2014 19:57 (ten years ago) link

^ a new challenger enters the arena

purposely lend impetus to my HOOS (BIG HOOS aka the steendriver), Tuesday, 13 May 2014 19:59 (ten years ago) link

omg stop

billstevejim, Tuesday, 13 May 2014 20:01 (ten years ago) link


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