Rolling 2004 Negative Reviews That Make The Subject Sound Awesome Thread

Now this one is just totally off the mark. I like soundtrack ambience, dammit!

"Once upon a time Mark Hollis was the intense-eyed ranting lad who shouted 'All you do is talk talk!' Then he became the anthemically melancholy lad who moaned 'Its my life!' and never looked back from a life of anthemic melancholy.

"As time goes by, Mark Hollis' music has slipped into a vat of dark, brooding melancholy so deep that even David Sylvian would join Right Said Fred rather than partake of its glummo brew.

"In despair did EMI release an anthemically melancholy singles album and in more despair an anthemically melancholy dance remix album - an act on a par with releasing an Ambient House mix of Sham 69's 'Hurry Up Harry,' only not as interesting.

"Now Hollis has gone to Verve and recorded 'Laughing Stock' with 23 acoustically-oriented bass and organ and drum people. There is a slight jazz feel to this record. There are elements of soundtrack ambience. There are songs called 'After The Flood.' There are lyrics like 'A hunger uncurbed by nature's calling.' The whole thing is unutterably pretentious and looks over its shoulder hoping that someone will remark on its 'moody brilliance' or some such. It's horrible."

it's a frighteningly common cliche to critique ozzy-era black sabbath as "stupid" music. not just among the hostile, but even among those who love that era black sabbath. yet, this "stupid" music had an unbelievably enormous influence which leads one to question the "stupid" label.

A friend was telling me that Daft Punk's Discovery wasn't that good. He said, "Yeah, I remember reading a review that was really right on: it said the album sounded like dance club, but from outside the club." WTF! I want to hear it now!

Haha, that Squarepusher review Mr. Snrub posted is actually spot-on! "Selection Sixteen" does have a couple of nice tracks, but it's still one of the worst records I've purchased for years.

"NINA HAGEN 'Nunsexmonkrock' (Columbia): The album oughtta win some kinda bad taste title - it has the proverbial major-star-in-Europe (so I'm told), Nina dressing as a Madonna cum bag lady/whore. It's really disgusting. The music (?) is so bad it's almost good, or at least good for a few laughs. Listen as Nina dribbles, sings, moans, talks backwards, throws up, spews incomprehensible inanities, and laughs at her own jokes in at least three (count 'em) languages. Impressive, eh? She also has a band that dabbles in reggae, pseudo-opera, shlock rock, progressive art-noise, quasi-religious hippy dippy mysticism and, probably, massive quantities of drugs, since I don't see how anyone could be this stupid on the natch. My suggestion is she team up with Wild Man Fischer; they could be the Sonny and Cher of the '80s. (j. poet)" - from Creem, October '82, made me interested not only in this album but in 'massive quantities of drugs'. Thanks for fucking my life up Creem