Bearsharktopus v. Bearotaur

imho - the Bearsharktopus doesn't stand a chance. top heavy and only tentacles to support it's front, it's no match for the speed and weaponry of Bearotaur.

― The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Monday, 14 June 2010 19:34 (2 years ago) Permalink

Speed is of the essence. Bearotaur.

― Madchen, Monday, 14 June 2010 19:59 (2 years ago) Permalink

bearotuar in a walk

― call all destroyer, Monday, 14 June 2010 20:04 (2 years ago) Permalink

where is the "yesssssssssssssssssssssssssssss" option?

― rugged and unrelenting (even brutal) (HI DERE), Monday, 14 June 2010 20:09 (2 years ago) Permalink

beatotaur is a fucking bitch. put your spiky bat down and we'll see what happens.

― goole, Monday, 14 June 2010 20:10 (2 years ago) Permalink

Bearsharktopus is just awesomer, regardless of whether it would flop about and fall over a lot, or not.

― flanimal collective (Upt0eleven), Monday, 14 June 2010 20:11 (2 years ago) Permalink

Guys, what if the fight takes place in water??

― Tuomas, Monday, 14 June 2010 22:00 (2 years ago) Permalink

both pics are on a beach. clearly our competitOrs have already chosen a battleground. ankle deep water.

― The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Tuesday, 15 June 2010 01:06 (2 years ago) Permalink

wondering if the bearsharktopus has also inherited the deadly intelligence of the octopus as well.

― an indie-rock microgenre (dyao), Tuesday, 15 June 2010 01:13 (2 years ago) Permalink

Which has left the most offspring??>?

― breaking that little dog's heart chakra (Abbott), Tuesday, 15 June 2010 01:14 (2 years ago) Permalink

wondering if the bearsharktopus has also inherited the deadly intelligence of the octopus as well.

i don't think so. otherwise it would have brought a weapon to the fight.

― The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Tuesday, 15 June 2010 03:49 (2 years ago) Permalink

I am also wondering how a Bear Centipede would fare in this fight

― an indie-rock microgenre (dyao), Tuesday, 15 June 2010 03:51 (2 years ago) Permalink

Pics?

― Tuomas, Tuesday, 15 June 2010 06:24 (2 years ago) Permalink

do not discount bearsharktopus my bredrin

― legalize gay pot (jdchurchill), Tuesday, 15 June 2010 16:57 (2 years ago) Permalink

yeah, i'm not so sure - bearotaur seems to have just regular old bear paws, which means no thumbs, which means that the admittedly kickass mace he's got is likely just duct-taped there. see, how both paws are on top? who holds a weapon like that? useless, dude.
on the other hand, bearshartopus looks like he eats some nasty stuff and likely has some literally stunning wicked reek going on. i guess bearotaur can still run away pretty fast though.

― Kim, Tuesday, 15 June 2010 17:06 (2 years ago) Permalink

the more i think about Bearsharktopus the more i think it would drown if it ever tried to swim. a shark isn't going anywhere without it's tail, which this guy does not posses. a squid gets around using water propulsion which is also absent here. even a bear needs it's from paws to swim!

― The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Thursday, 17 June 2010 15:32 (2 years ago) Permalink

Q: Where is bearsharktopus from?
A: It's from paws!

― Damn these skinny jeans' pockets. (HI DERE), Thursday, 17 June 2010 15:33 (2 years ago) Permalink

I think it's quite attractive

paws

― stofu (cozen), Thursday, 17 June 2010 15:35 (2 years ago) Permalink

not sure how bearotaur is gonna fare once he gets close enough to do any damage, but i'm gonna say speed would win the day for him.

― Remember when Mr Banhart was a replicant? (darraghmac), Thursday, 17 June 2010 15:37 (2 years ago) Permalink

speed as in "omg look how fast bearsharktopus tore bearotaur's legs off with those monstrous tentacles"?

― Damn these skinny jeans' pockets. (HI DERE), Thursday, 17 June 2010 15:38 (2 years ago) Permalink

those tentacles aren't monstrous, they're stubby- that's why i'm not giving them as much due as i otherwise would.

― Remember when Mr Banhart was a replicant? (darraghmac), Thursday, 17 June 2010 15:40 (2 years ago) Permalink

paws

― stofu (cozen), Thursday, 17 June 2010 15:41 (2 years ago) Permalink

right now the only thing bearotaur has going for him is his sweet castle; pretty sure there's a ballista up there backing him up for when the velcro on that club comes loose

― Damn these skinny jeans' pockets. (HI DERE), Thursday, 17 June 2010 15:42 (2 years ago) Permalink

it's where he's holding bearsharktopus's daughter hostage.

― The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Thursday, 17 June 2010 15:43 (2 years ago) Permalink

if bearsharktopus even tried to bring its jaws into play it would fall over

― Remember when Mr Banhart was a replicant? (darraghmac), Thursday, 17 June 2010 15:43 (2 years ago) Permalink

obv the skarktopus part of it couldn't care less, but the bear component is fucking pissed!

xpost - exactly!

― The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Thursday, 17 June 2010 15:44 (2 years ago) Permalink

you guys the bearsharktopus can only look up

― puff puff post (uh oh I'm having a fantasy), Thursday, 17 June 2010 15:47 (2 years ago) Permalink

aaaaa

now i'm imagining it coming at me from below

― Remember when Mr Banhart was a replicant? (darraghmac), Thursday, 17 June 2010 15:47 (2 years ago) Permalink

this is also imp. data re: the bearotaur

― puff puff post (uh oh I'm having a fantasy), Thursday, 17 June 2010 15:48 (2 years ago) Permalink

holy fucking shit!!!!!

― The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Thursday, 17 June 2010 16:00 (2 years ago) Permalink

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

― System, Monday, 28 June 2010 23:04 (2 years ago) Permalink

voted bearotaur under pressure

― Jarlrmai, Monday, 28 June 2010 23:17 (2 years ago) Permalink

That video suggests the bearotaur will mostly be using that club to hit itself in the head, so I'm voting bearsharktopus.

― Scelsi Hotel (Paul in Santa Cruz), Tuesday, 29 June 2010 02:39 (2 years ago) Permalink

furry fin is adorable, bearsharktopus wins for cuddle-bility.

― peacocks, Tuesday, 29 June 2010 14:21 (2 years ago) Permalink

u got a low threshold of cuddleability, imo

― ,,,,,,eeeeleon (darraghmac), Tuesday, 29 June 2010 14:23 (2 years ago) Permalink

so are these SyFy original movies or what

― ~athdouspart (some dude), Tuesday, 29 June 2010 14:24 (2 years ago) Permalink

I'm a sucker for suction cups, tbqh

― peacocks, Tuesday, 29 June 2010 14:27 (2 years ago) Permalink

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

― System, Tuesday, 29 June 2010 23:01 (2 years ago) Permalink

a travesty - bearsharktopus should have won!

― sarahel, Tuesday, 29 June 2010 23:03 (2 years ago) Permalink

nonsense. it can barely stand.
the people have spoken.

― The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Tuesday, 29 June 2010 23:06 (2 years ago) Permalink

bearsharktopus can both stand and swim! It can probably breathe underwater, unlike bearotaur.

― sarahel, Tuesday, 29 June 2010 23:08 (2 years ago) Permalink

if by "swim" you mean "thrash about frantically until it sinks to the ocean floor" i would be in agreement.

― The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Tuesday, 29 June 2010 23:10 (2 years ago) Permalink

although i will concede it could breath just fine down there.

― The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Tuesday, 29 June 2010 23:10 (2 years ago) Permalink

in the episode of X-Files, the thing that could breathe underwater won vs. that which could not

― sarahel, Tuesday, 29 June 2010 23:12 (2 years ago) Permalink

Mulder was which one?

― The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Tuesday, 29 June 2010 23:14 (2 years ago) Permalink

at any rate - the battle is not happening in the deep blue depths, but the shoreline in which both are photographed.

― The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Tuesday, 29 June 2010 23:15 (2 years ago) Permalink

no, it was alien-human underwater hybrid breathing creature vs. helpful sewer system supervisor and before him, hapless sewer maintenance technician

― sarahel, Tuesday, 29 June 2010 23:17 (2 years ago) Permalink

basically bearsharktopus could employ a similar strategy and hide underwater until bearotaur enters the water, then knock bearotaur off-balance by grabbing bearotaur with the tentacles, then delivering fatal bites

― sarahel, Tuesday, 29 June 2010 23:18 (2 years ago) Permalink

how do you hide underwater? it's clear!

― The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Tuesday, 29 June 2010 23:27 (2 years ago) Permalink

hmmmm. not an unlikely outcome when you think about it.

― The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Wednesday, 7 July 2010 22:03 (2 years ago) Permalink

john, you are insulting Blind Idiot God for suggesting they're responsible for that stupid winnie the bear-horse thing

― sarahel, Wednesday, 7 July 2010 22:11 (2 years ago) Permalink

if a "blind idiot god" were to create anything it would be that monstrosity of a hairshartopus. a creature incapable of moving forward or even swimming due to it's frankenstein-like stitching.

― The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall,

Co-sign, OTM & recommend 4 medal.

― ,,,,,,eeeeleon (darraghmac), Thursday, 8 July 2010 09:08 (2 years ago) Permalink

i see no stitching on BEARSHARKTOPUS!!!! which we have seen can rip John Oates' head clean off

― sarahel, Thursday, 8 July 2010 09:10 (2 years ago) Permalink

the song Maneater was actually about Bearsharktopus

― sarahel, Thursday, 8 July 2010 09:13 (2 years ago) Permalink

theme:

hairshart tonight, wrapped around the corpus of death tonight
hairshart burning becuz this is the nexus of love tonight (tonite tonite tonite.....)
alright!!! tonight!!!
tentacles of love and hair within the light tonight
octopus sanction of vengeance coming down alight
fire within the gill-flesh armor of shark tonight
alright......alright......ALRIGHT!

pot of hunny, btw

― good news if you wear cargo shorts (contenderizer), Thursday, 8 July 2010 09:27 (2 years ago) Permalink

in the spirit of:

― good news if you wear cargo shorts (contenderizer), Thursday, 8 July 2010 12:11 (2 years ago) Permalink

bearotaur so lame the durans don't even notice him, except for nick rhodes who's all 'whateverrrrrrr'

― postcards from the (ledge), Thursday, 8 July 2010 12:51 (2 years ago) Permalink

They laugh at his cheaply pierced ear.

― peacocks, Thursday, 8 July 2010 12:57 (2 years ago) Permalink

man, was SO drunk

― good news if you wear cargo shorts (contenderizer), Thursday, 8 July 2010 16:14 (2 years ago) Permalink

is hard to "draw" undr normal circumstances with little touch pad guy, but...

― good news if you wear cargo shorts (contenderizer), Thursday, 8 July 2010 16:15 (2 years ago) Permalink

I assume being incredibly drunk and hairsharts always go together

― emo WINNER! (HI DERE), Thursday, 8 July 2010 16:15 (2 years ago) Permalink

lolololol

― The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Thursday, 8 July 2010 16:25 (2 years ago) Permalink

i am seeing a trend on this thread.

― The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Thursday, 8 July 2010 16:32 (2 years ago) Permalink

― ,,,,,,eeeeleon (darraghmac), Thursday, 8 July 2010 16:36 (2 years ago) Permalink

who would win in jeopardy?

― peacocks, Thursday, 8 July 2010 16:37 (2 years ago) Permalink

as above imo

― ,,,,,,eeeeleon (darraghmac), Thursday, 8 July 2010 16:40 (2 years ago) Permalink

depends on if you define winner as "the one who answers the most questions" or as "the one who eats everyone on stage and runs off with the money"

― emo WINNER! (HI DERE), Thursday, 8 July 2010 16:43 (2 years ago) Permalink

if we're talking running then it's def not the hiarsharktopus!

― The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Thursday, 8 July 2010 16:45 (2 years ago) Permalink

need a (drawing) tablet bad

― good news if you wear cargo shorts (contenderizer), Thursday, 8 July 2010 16:46 (2 years ago) Permalink

but darragh u just made my day :D

― good news if you wear cargo shorts (contenderizer), Thursday, 8 July 2010 16:48 (2 years ago) Permalink

i love this thread ... and i'm sober now.

― sarahel, Thursday, 8 July 2010 20:27 (2 years ago) Permalink

its easy to fix that problem u know

― NO NO NO NO NO ok (jjjusten), Thursday, 8 July 2010 20:51 (2 years ago) Permalink

the fact i'm sober or the earlier problem of bearotaur being bearotaurdo montalban?

― sarahel, Thursday, 8 July 2010 20:57 (2 years ago) Permalink

sobriety is a totally curable diease thanks to medical and retail science

― NO NO NO NO NO ok (jjjusten), Thursday, 8 July 2010 21:00 (2 years ago) Permalink

bearotaur's retardedness is incurable tho

― sarahel, Thursday, 8 July 2010 21:16 (2 years ago) Permalink

need to photoshop andrei arshavin into a pic with both, and whichever eats the most of him by weight wins imo.

― Everytime I hit 'submit post' the internet gets dumber (darraghmac), Wednesday, 14 July 2010 12:15 (2 years ago) Permalink

― not_goodwin, Wednesday, 14 July 2010 13:42 (2 years ago) Permalink

man another reason to distrust kanye

― bearotaur say "I am so sorry" to me! (jjjusten), Wednesday, 14 July 2010 18:36 (2 years ago) Permalink

which is more retarded: kanye west or bearotaur

― sarahel, Wednesday, 14 July 2010 18:38 (2 years ago) Permalink

oh thats easy that would be bearotaur

― bearotaur say "I am so sorry" to me! (jjjusten), Wednesday, 14 July 2010 18:39 (2 years ago) Permalink

i have reached that point where bearotaur however fills me with sadness and pity, whereas kanye is like a buzzing fly. poor poor shameful bearotaur

― bearotaur say "I am so sorry" to me! (jjjusten), Wednesday, 14 July 2010 18:40 (2 years ago) Permalink

i dunno john, i think kanye west might just be stupider than bearotaur

― sarahel, Wednesday, 14 July 2010 18:42 (2 years ago) Permalink

waiting for Kanye to tweet WEL AT LEAST I'M NOT AS RETATRDED AS BEAROTAUR LOL

― Fee Fie Fo, FUNFNFUINFLFF! (HI DERE), Wednesday, 14 July 2010 18:42 (2 years ago) Permalink

Kanyetaur.

― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 14 July 2010 18:51 (2 years ago) Permalink

for reference:

― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 14 July 2010 19:03 (2 years ago) Permalink

Nothing's as retarded as whatever bearotaur kicks in the head.

― Madchen, Wednesday, 14 July 2010 19:14 (2 years ago) Permalink

if you want a vision of the future, imagine bearotaur kicking himself in the head...FOREVER

― bearotaur say "I am so sorry" to me! (jjjusten), Wednesday, 14 July 2010 19:17 (2 years ago) Permalink

bearotaur and kanye kicking each other in the head forever would be a funny vision of the future

― sarahel, Wednesday, 14 July 2010 19:18 (2 years ago) Permalink

if you want a vision of the future, imagine bearotaur kicking himself in the head...FOREVER

pretty sure bearotaur would need completely different legs to achieve that

maybe when they unvelcro the mace they can slap a couple on his paws

― Hot Tub Fellatio Machine (HI DERE), Wednesday, 14 July 2010 19:18 (2 years ago) Permalink

Bondage Goat Zombie vs. Bearotaur

― sarahel, Wednesday, 14 July 2010 21:52 (2 years ago) Permalink

the picture is kinda blurry - what Bondage Goat Zombie holds in its hoof is Bearotaur's Little Brain

― sarahel, Wednesday, 14 July 2010 21:55 (2 years ago) Permalink

did a goat zombie take that picture?

― my cock is a spiral ham (The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall), Wednesday, 14 July 2010 22:25 (2 years ago) Permalink

while drunk?!

― my cock is a spiral ham (The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall), Wednesday, 14 July 2010 22:25 (2 years ago) Permalink

and with auto focus off?

― not_goodwin, Wednesday, 14 July 2010 22:27 (2 years ago) Permalink

you saw the picture before you uploaded it and you thought it'd be fine, i'm happy with this out of focus picture to go up on the net for many people to see and went ahead and posted it?

― not_goodwin, Wednesday, 14 July 2010 22:29 (2 years ago) Permalink

lol that image is to the Bearotaur detractors what the Hitler billboard is to the tea partiers!

― my cock is a spiral ham (The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall), Wednesday, 14 July 2010 22:39 (2 years ago) Permalink

bearsharktopus sux

― Randy Carol (darraghmac), Wednesday, 19 September 2012 15:08 (8 months ago) Permalink

Clearly bearsharktopus is the ultimate winner here, since bearotaur has run away.

― Tuomas, Thursday, 20 September 2012 06:46 (8 months ago) Permalink

fair point, but our cavedrawing tributes remain in tribute as secondary evidence

― Randy Carol (darraghmac), Thursday, 20 September 2012 08:49 (8 months ago) Permalink