Let's Win the New Yorker Caption Contest

high early standard on this one, DJP and forks in particular

yeah you should submit that dan

"put your mother down NOW"

"Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn"

"Eh...too blonde. 6."

"I"m sorry honey, he has droit du seigneur."

― I'M THAT POSTA, AAAAAAAAAH (DJP), Thursday, April 26, 2012 9:49 AM (30 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

"i TOLD you to wait an hour"

― "in this super-sexy postracial age" (forksclovetofu), Thursday, April 26, 2012 9:52 AM (28 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

^^^can't choose. both perfect

"honey, you know i left my glasses in the car. help with what?"

"just relax, it's more scared of you than you are of it"

"christ, what an octopus"

"Don't worry, it's a vegatarian!"

http://www.newyorker.com/images/2012/05/14/p465/120514_contest_p465.jpg

"MI6 actually"

"I'm attempting to circumvent the ridiculous luggage restrictions imposed by this airline!!!!!!"

"Get off my case"

"Well I don't care if Bill Murray could 'make it work', I feel like an idiot"

"It's not my fault you had the venti instead of the grande."

"What do you mean 'except' the kitchen sink?"

"Damn, I think I forgot my toothbrush"

"Oh god, my toothbrush just went straight up my asshole"

"Robodude 9000 feels no pain.... no pain...."

"wearing sunglasses on a plane, how obnoxious."

technically i'm a human suitcase, but i wear many hats

lto

"my therapist told me to externalize my emotional baggage"

there's a "keep calm and carry on" joke in here somewhere but i can't get at it

I really especially hate this one.

"Customs is a bitch but check out is a snap."

yes, this picture is not funny

xp

tracer otm

this one demands the words accentuate, not guide the image because the cartoon is self-actualizing ("I'm attempting to circumvent the ridiculous luggage restrictions imposed by this airline!!!!!!") and is not only not funny but doesn't really reward deeper thought.
so you kinda got to make it quiddy i think.

"I'm gonna make a fuss like Kevin Smith on twitter when they kick me off the plane."

"You can come out when we land"

"Allahu Akbar!"

"I'm flying above the clouds at 540 mph, but they used to serve hot meals."

"(FARRRRRRT!)"

im a suitcase

"If you think this looks uncomfortable, you should see what I did to get around the restriction on liquids!"

"Boy they really pack you like sardines in these things, don't they?"

Part of what is irritating me about this one is that the positioning of the other passenger makes no sense to me visually.

"this is the only drawback to my plan to get a free cancer screening by going through the airport x-ray machines"

like, is he partially under the guy with the suitcase, and does he have two left arms?

"the craziest thing about me is that for some reason i am bringing four different hats on this trip"

"Guess I'm just on a lucky streak - second time I've been upgraded from baggage to coach for free."

"favorite unintentionally homoerotic new yorker cartoon imagery"

"my therapist told me i had to get a 'handle' on my fear of flying!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

im a suitcase

― max, Tuesday, May 8, 2012 4:50 PM (9 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

This is the only one so far that's actually made me laugh.

haha n/a I had the same thought about the hats, especially since three of them look like identical knit caps in different colors

"One for each day of Bonaroo"

what's going on with the passenger to his right? is he flat stanley slipping between the two seats?

"been upgraded from baggage" is lols.

"Ironically, I could fit very few items in this bag, because the bulk of its capacity is consumed by the volume of my own body."