Does the entire Innocent Smoothies aesthetic strike you as deeply fucking irritating?

Message Bookmarked
Bookmark Removed

n/m

The stickman from the hilarious "xkcd" comics, Friday, 18 July 2008 12:59 (4 years ago) Permalink

Possibly cf with the ILM Noah and the Whale thread, actually.

The stickman from the hilarious "xkcd" comics, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:00 (4 years ago) Permalink

it probably would if their smoothies weren't actually head and shoulders above the competition.

G00blar, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:01 (4 years ago) Permalink

Not really. Although I suppose as part of (precursor to?) the whole twee countryside picnic Waitrose type adverts with some warbling accoustic number in the background I can see how it could grate a bit.

Ned Trifle II, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:02 (4 years ago) Permalink

oh xp, 'cos yes their xmoothies are (mostly) very good.

Ned Trifle II, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:02 (4 years ago) Permalink

I used to have to deal with their marketing department on a regular basis, and they were uber-cynical cunts of the highest order, even by marketing department standards.

Matt DC, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:03 (4 years ago) Permalink

xpost huh
also i think every supermarket now has a generic smoothie line with the damn-near exact same packaging aesthetic.

G00blar, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:04 (4 years ago) Permalink

Snakes On A Plane!

DJ Mencap, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:04 (4 years ago) Permalink

The aesthetic is repellent and the drinks are insanely over-priced bollocks so yes just a bit.

Noodle Vague, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:05 (4 years ago) Permalink

G00blar, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:06 (4 years ago) Permalink

^^^somerfield

G00blar, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:06 (4 years ago) Permalink

xp
Not going to their picnic then?

Ned Trifle II, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:06 (4 years ago) Permalink

G00blar, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:08 (4 years ago) Permalink

This Water (tm) is full of the lovingly squeezed juice of forty-eight cranberries OK WE GET IT I DO NOT WANT TO SPEND 2 QUID ON A SMALL BOTTLE OF FRUIT

Just got offed, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:08 (4 years ago) Permalink

Earl Okins playing...

Ned Trifle II, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:09 (4 years ago) Permalink

...at the picnic that is.

Ned Trifle II, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:09 (4 years ago) Permalink

yes wtf with this water

G00blar, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:09 (4 years ago) Permalink

This is what happens when you let Belle and Sebastian fans into the food and drink industry.

Matt DC, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:10 (4 years ago) Permalink

They invented it and then everyone else ripped it off. I didn't mind it when they did it.

But when everything you buy these days has got a section in their packaging saying "Hello you, welcome to the side of the packet! My name is Tad Fadley's new urban wenge and did you know that I am made out of 100% pure organic smugness. The scrummy goo inside me was personally farted out through the buttocks of a lovely young homosexual called Jason - MmmmmMMM! Oh it's delicious, drink me drink me! I'd really like to know what you think of me so drop me a letter, fax or even a tattooed baby (LOL! JKS!) of what you think. If you have a phone you can actually speak to Jason himself while he shits into a vat of pure untreated fairtrade effluent." it gets rather annoying, yeah.

the next grozart, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:11 (4 years ago) Permalink

I couldn't tell whether this was a musical subgenre or a category of porn.

jaymc, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:11 (4 years ago) Permalink

"The people at Innocent deal with the fruit-based products, and This Water with the water-based ones." - actual comment on bottle of This Water I once regrettably bought

(both Innocent and This Water deal with fruit-and-water-based products)

lol DL

Just got offed, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:12 (4 years ago) Permalink

I just get annoyed by so much other stuff, this is pretty far down the list.

Ned Trifle II, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:13 (4 years ago) Permalink

dude i used to work with tried to jump ship to their marketing department AND FAILED HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

DG, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:14 (4 years ago) Permalink

Tad Fadley's new urban wenge

Oh for the days etc

DJ Mencap, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:15 (4 years ago) Permalink

Soft drinks as I know and understand them.

Dingbod Kesterson, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:16 (4 years ago) Permalink

who gives a fuck about this

blueski, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:18 (4 years ago) Permalink

No, this is the real shit:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=thxAqdxGSPU

Noodle Vague, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:18 (4 years ago) Permalink

I inadvertently found myself at their picnic a few years ago. Ruined my afternoon in the park. Fuckers.

Upt0eleven, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:19 (4 years ago) Permalink

And they're charging for it this year. Double fuckers.

Upt0eleven, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:19 (4 years ago) Permalink

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I5F23TxSpZk

I would drink all this orange pop

Noodle Vague, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:20 (4 years ago) Permalink

i had a smoothie phase, but after deciding to cut down on sugar i am back on the cherry coke

blueski, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:20 (4 years ago) Permalink

Cresta: The blackcurrent beverage that induces strokes.

Upt0eleven, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:20 (4 years ago) Permalink

^ Xpost! LOLZ. Lolz at phrase 'warbling acoustic number'.
Yeah Innocent Smoothies....I'm just waiting for the Ribena (notsotoothkind) style scandal to happen.
"Hello you, welcome to the side of the packet! My name is Tad Fadley's new urban wenge and did you know that I am made out of 100% pure organic smugness. The scrummy goo inside me was personally farted out through the buttocks of a lovely young homosexual called Jason - MmmmmMMM! Oh it's delicious, drink me drink me! I'd really like to know what you think of me so drop me a letter, fax or even a tattooed baby (LOL! JKS!) of what you think. If you have a phone you can actually speak to Jason himself while he shits into a vat of pure untreated fairtrade effluent." it gets rather annoying, yeahHahaha
But like Ned says, this is irritating but not as much as many other things.

VeronaInTheClub, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:21 (4 years ago) Permalink

I miss the 70s and I want to go back there right now. This century fucking sucks.

Noodle Vague, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:21 (4 years ago) Permalink

When did adverts stop trying to be hip? Those Noodle ones are grebt

Upt0eleven, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:22 (4 years ago) Permalink

I am an unashamed Innocent fan.

Scik Mouthy, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:23 (4 years ago) Permalink

"It's frothy at the mouth, man!"

Mark G, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:23 (4 years ago) Permalink

xpost now I have the Billy Joel song in my head!

Mark G, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:23 (4 years ago) Permalink

Yeah, back to the seventies with its needless foreign wars and epidemics of knife crime in our streets.

Dingbod Kesterson, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:24 (4 years ago) Permalink

I was going to poll every flavour of Rubicon earlier this week and never got round to it.

Matt DC, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:25 (4 years ago) Permalink

matt dc - do it!

the next grozart, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:28 (4 years ago) Permalink

100% pure organic smugness.

I'm all for eating fresh stuff, but this kind of twee bollocks just makes me want to smoke a carton of R0thmans, drink six Red Bulls, and eat a kebab containing Alsatian meat cooked rare.

snoball, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:28 (4 years ago) Permalink

i had a smoothie phase, but after deciding to cut down on sugar i am back on the cherry coke

er...

CharlieNo4, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:29 (4 years ago) Permalink

It must be good for you, it's got cherries in it.

snoball, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:32 (4 years ago) Permalink

Diet Coke = no sugar
Smoothies = a whole shitload of sugar

Noodle Vague, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:33 (4 years ago) Permalink

Diet Coke = no meaning in the universe

blueski, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:33 (4 years ago) Permalink

^OTM

Ed, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:34 (4 years ago) Permalink

People who don't like Diet Coke should just kill themselves, imo

The stickman from the hilarious "xkcd" comics, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:36 (4 years ago) Permalink

Don't tell me, I only drink any of that shit as a mixer.

Noodle Vague, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:36 (4 years ago) Permalink

Srsly shit ALL TASTES THE SAME

Noodle Vague, Friday, 18 July 2008 13:36 (4 years ago) Permalink

Was it a twee bottle of vitamin water that tried to be matey with you? Normal vitamin water is fine.

"Hey, what's up man, hi bro"

"If you don't like my song, you don't have to listen, Britta, alright? I'm an artist, and I write what I feel. And I feel that you suck."

Matt DC, Thursday, 17 January 2013 20:09 (4 months ago) Permalink

i just bought my first ever innocent product :(

their juices are half price in sainsbury :(

never hated myself for buying something this much :(

lex pretend, Thursday, 17 January 2013 20:20 (4 months ago) Permalink

> How many fucking tiny bobble hats do you need in one square foot of space?

that's a thing though, isn't it. once a year all the bottles come with tiny bobble hats and some money goes to some charity, somehow.

koogs, Thursday, 17 January 2013 20:22 (4 months ago) Permalink

p much impossible to spend money at a supermarket without contributing to corporate dickheadery, self-forgiveness is the path of least resistance

imago, Thursday, 17 January 2013 20:23 (4 months ago) Permalink

I visited the Rackspace offices last year and they've got bizarre grassy bits and fake parks and stuff inside the building.

This mini has been converted to a four person meeting room

Swings

The reception area is lifted straight out of a Mirror's Edge level

Stop Gerrying Me! (onimo), Friday, 18 January 2013 11:40 (4 months ago) Permalink

preschool or workplace, who can guess

just sayin, Friday, 18 January 2013 11:46 (4 months ago) Permalink

AlanSmithee, Friday, 18 January 2013 11:51 (4 months ago) Permalink

i'm having my ape hour

imago, Friday, 18 January 2013 12:09 (4 months ago) Permalink

Fuck those barefoot people.

Walter Galt, Friday, 18 January 2013 23:59 (4 months ago) Permalink

oh god, for a gigantic buzzsaw to fly along at head height here

Sgt. Biscuits, Saturday, 19 January 2013 00:14 (4 months ago) Permalink

that one guy in solitary confinement in the little cabin

a la recherche du tempbans perdu (NickB), Saturday, 19 January 2013 00:26 (4 months ago) Permalink

actually that would probably be my chosen seat if i worked there

a la recherche du tempbans perdu (NickB), Saturday, 19 January 2013 00:27 (4 months ago) Permalink

fuck off out of my cabin chuckleheads

a la recherche du tempbans perdu (NickB), Saturday, 19 January 2013 00:28 (4 months ago) Permalink

i wd be down for being barefoot at work tbh. also having my own cabin.

non-elitist melted poo (Noodle Vague), Saturday, 19 January 2013 09:42 (4 months ago) Permalink

2 months pass...

turns out the french aren't immune to the exact same twee copy style:

http://www.micheletaugustin.com/indexflash.htm

jonathan livingston seapunk (c sharp major), Thursday, 4 April 2013 21:30 (1 month ago) Permalink

Is that site actually aimed at French people, or just English speaking people who want to buy twee food labelled in French?

Will you see a political publicity stunt? (snoball), Thursday, 4 April 2013 21:38 (1 month ago) Permalink

(my French isn't actually good enough to tell the difference)

Will you see a political publicity stunt? (snoball), Thursday, 4 April 2013 21:38 (1 month ago) Permalink

french people! this stuff isn't sold in the uk (in fact the packet is very proud that some of their biscuits could be found in, specifically, the dean and deluca on broadway in new york city, in 2010)

jonathan livingston seapunk (c sharp major), Thursday, 4 April 2013 23:00 (1 month ago) Permalink

oh god michel et augustin... i have a few friends who worked or interned there and they made it sound just as twee as you'd think. bt it's changed a bit the past couple of years and now supposedly either michel or augustin is a major pain in the ass. i have to hand it to them though, some of their biscuits are really tasty. quite expensive too though.

Jibe, Friday, 5 April 2013 12:29 (1 month ago) Permalink

according to local estate agent, W12 has been renamed 'Chez Bu'...

koogs, Friday, 5 April 2013 18:48 (1 month ago) Permalink

2 weeks pass...

L___ G___ shared Innocent drinks's photo.

If you are running in the London Marathon today, we salute you. And if you're not doing anything active today, we salute you too. It's Sunday after all.

RIP Muppet Fat Chef (onimo), Sunday, 21 April 2013 11:57 (1 month ago) Permalink

3 weeks pass...

bye bye our pieminister pie
we're really going to miss you
and that is no lie
it's just those good ol' boys
are waiting with their
mash on the side singing
this is the day we'll eat pie
this is the day we'll eat pie

Printed on the side of their takeaway bags. Have these people even ever heard the fucking song? Half the lines don't fit ffs.

Elvis was a hero to most but he never her (ledge), Wednesday, 15 May 2013 13:47 (1 week ago) Permalink

forgot the crucial exclamation mark at the end

Elvis was a hero to most but he never her (ledge), Wednesday, 15 May 2013 13:47 (1 week ago) Permalink

none of it fits. fuck pieminister.

... (LocalGarda), Wednesday, 15 May 2013 13:54 (1 week ago) Permalink

fuck off and pie

dschinghis kraan (NickB), Wednesday, 15 May 2013 13:56 (1 week ago) Permalink

would be a great name for a shop

dschinghis kraan (NickB), Wednesday, 15 May 2013 13:56 (1 week ago) Permalink

i hate myself and i want a pie

The Parvenu Fucktard (onimo), Wednesday, 15 May 2013 13:59 (1 week ago) Permalink

pie antwoord

caek, Wednesday, 15 May 2013 14:22 (1 week ago) Permalink

i immediately regret that post, please don't turn this into one of those threads, i apologize

caek, Wednesday, 15 May 2013 14:24 (1 week ago) Permalink

iirc the instructions printed on the card box Pieminister pies come in say "open the flaps and munch". MISTAH WRIGHT!

warm leveret (DJ Mencap), Wednesday, 15 May 2013 14:34 (1 week ago) Permalink

I'd forgive the twee if the pies weren't terrible

Chuck_Tatum, Thursday, 16 May 2013 14:10 (6 days ago) Permalink

have never had a pie that i'd really say was "nice". is it even possible? they're just soakage as far as i can tell.

... (LocalGarda), Thursday, 16 May 2013 14:23 (6 days ago) Permalink

nice is maybe the wrong word but you can't whack a good pie

the league against cool sports (Noodle Vague), Thursday, 16 May 2013 14:25 (6 days ago) Permalink

yeah that's my feeling. perhaps the ones i've tried just aren't formidable enough. like what's the quintessentially great british pie?

i speak as someone who fucking loves their pub counterpart, a scotch egg. actually saying that i'd have to say the best pies i've had are the cold ones where you get a big slice and maybe some mustard with it.

... (LocalGarda), Thursday, 16 May 2013 14:27 (6 days ago) Permalink

that's a terrible thing to print on a bag. i hate the song "american pie". why would satan want to destory rock and roll? it doesn't even make any sense.

Treeship, Thursday, 16 May 2013 14:28 (6 days ago) Permalink

xp Steak & Kidney has to be up there. Steak & ale also.

Neil S, Thursday, 16 May 2013 14:28 (6 days ago) Permalink

aye a good steak and kidney is the pinnacle for me, assuming i can't just say "my nan's meat and potato pie" which i haven't eaten in 30-odd years. a great Cornish pasty can hit the spot too. apart from pasties, pie on the go is never fully satisfactory in my experience. can't beat a plate, a pile of mash and mushy peas and plenty of decent gravy to set a pie in its best light.

the league against cool sports (Noodle Vague), Thursday, 16 May 2013 14:33 (6 days ago) Permalink

my chicken + leek pie beats anything pieminister could come up with. As annoying as PM have since become, they were always a staple at music festivals, where they were a notch above nasty festival burgers.

food and boardgames and minimal techno (NotEnough), Thursday, 16 May 2013 14:42 (6 days ago) Permalink

Chicken & leek pie a great way to use up half a roast chicken.

Neil S, Thursday, 16 May 2013 14:46 (6 days ago) Permalink

Those old thin crust (and presumably BSE-ridden) fish-and-chip-shop steak and kidney pies - classic.

Nu-pies are always too dry.

Chuck_Tatum, Thursday, 16 May 2013 14:50 (6 days ago) Permalink

I have no problem with Pieminister pies as food objects - proper pastry, decent ingredients, not too dry - but the ridiculous names stick in my craw. Only one stamp on my card before I get a free one though so I'll have to suck it up a bit longer.

Elvis was a hero to most but he never her (ledge), Thursday, 16 May 2013 14:53 (6 days ago) Permalink

The pies are alright but the little boxes you get them in are never big enough and you have to dig the stupid wooden fork thing in at awkward angles and sort of hack at the crust.

Matt DC, Thursday, 16 May 2013 15:21 (6 days ago) Permalink

"Vegetablists"

Matt DC, Thursday, 16 May 2013 15:22 (6 days ago) Permalink

Is this the right place to post about the new coke marketing ploy which involves putting peoples names on the bottles and pretending like its your best friend?

Fucking stupid.

beingcutesince1980 (captain rosie), Thursday, 16 May 2013 15:24 (6 days ago) Permalink

Argh, please fuck off with this shit, everyone. JUST STOP IT NOW.

emil.y, Thursday, 16 May 2013 15:24 (6 days ago) Permalink

xp

Neil S, Thursday, 16 May 2013 15:25 (6 days ago) Permalink

"get in fella" - ugh fuck off

... (LocalGarda), Thursday, 16 May 2013 16:07 (6 days ago) Permalink

Its confused mixture of tweeness and clunky laddism feels very 2013.

Matt DC, Thursday, 16 May 2013 16:11 (6 days ago) Permalink

Ghost of Jamie Oliver.

... (LocalGarda), Thursday, 16 May 2013 16:13 (6 days ago) Permalink

Less dissing of delicious pies itt pls
But I was wondering when they would get a mention on this thread :(

kinder, Thursday, 16 May 2013 16:39 (6 days ago) Permalink


You must be logged in to post. Please either login here, or if you are not registered, you may register here.