Huckabee to GQ: Gay Marriage Will End Civilization

yup.

i've been really annoyed by this idea that OF COURSE Chick-fil-A is anti-gay "because they're Christian!" like what did you expect, liberals?! just because someone is Christian we're to automatically assume they're going to be bigoted?? one of my best friends is the pastor at a Presbyterian church not two blocks from Independence Hall. if he owned a business, it's highly unlikely he would be open on Sunday. but he also supports marriage equality (because WWJD?), and he would never give money to a hate group like the Family Research Council.

also weird is how personally these folks seem to be taking this. how dare one suggest folks shouldn't support CFA! evangelical groups boycott companies ALL THE TIME and no one says boo (Disney, JC Penney, Target, Hormel, etc etc). (tho i get that the Boston & Chicago mayors throwing in makes this a little dicier)

anyway, shouldn't they be thrilled that now they won't have to eat their crappy chicken sandwich around any of them queer fellers?

saw a guy wearing pink shorts and sockless boat shoes at the one on campus today who looked thrilled to bite into the fried meat in his hand

You can still avoid this place and loathe where the money goes and shake your head at gay libs who think "banning" CFA and having gays married and in the military will bring the US to nirvana.

saw a guy wearing pink shorts and sockless boat shoes at the one on campus today who looked thrilled to bite into the fried meat in his hand

― a regina spektor is haunting europe (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Monday, July 30, 2012 8:15 PM Bookmark Flag Post

Lol was that me

Chick-Fil-A Weekend

You can still avoid this place and loathe where the money goes and shake your head at gay libs who think "banning" CFA and having gays married and in the military will bring the US to nirvana.

you can still create the nirvana of false dichotomies!

oh, so not getting into rhetorical cockfights.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/07/30/chick-fil-a-brand-approval-rating-anti-gay-controversy_n_1719359.html

timely!

http://www.theonion.com/articles/chickfila-debuts-new-homophobic-sandwich,28888/

Chick-Fil-A Debuts New Homophobic Sandwich

'Queer-Hatin' Cordon Bleu' Goes On Sale Wednesday

JULY 24, 2012 | ISSUE 48•30

ATLANTA—As part of its recent efforts to publicly align itself with fundamentalist Christian values, the Chick-fil-A restaurant chain announced today the debut of its new Queer-Hatin' Cordon Bleu sandwich that would be on sale in all of the company's 1,600 restaurants this Wednesday.

In a press conference to reporters, company representatives said the homophobic new sandwich will include the national fast food chain’s trademark fried chicken filet wrapped in a piece of specially-smoked No Homo ham that would be topped with a slice of Swiss cheese and lathered in a creamy new Thousand Island-based Fag Punching sauce.

"The Queer-Hatin' Cordon Bleu is our company's way of showing our firm commitment to strong, Christian family values," said Chick-fil-A spokesman Robert Gary, before adding that the vehemently anti-gay rights sandwich comes served in a combo with waffle fries and a medium soda for just $6.95. "From the very first morsel of this savory meal to the very last bite, customers can envision gays burning in hell with their sodomizing cohorts, and know that our sandwich is on their side.”

"Of course, the young ones will want to finish their meals off right with a No Fudge Packin' Soft Serve Cone," Gary added. "I can't think of a better way to follow up a sandwich this good."

While the release of the Queer-Hatin’ Cordon Bleu has led to anger from pro-gay rights groups, loyal Chick-fil-A customers claim they are happy they can finally enjoy a sandwich that takes a firm stance on the issue of homosexuality.

"Any sandwich that combines that great Chick-fil-A flavor with a hefty dose of vitriolic homophobia is definitely going to keep me coming back for more," said Atlanta customer John Oaks. “Come Wednesday, I’m going to be first in line for this thing.”

According to sources, the Queer-Hatin’ Cordon Bleu is merely the first of Chick-fil-A’s new family values menu which is set to include the AIDS Is God’s Curse chicken nugget combo and the Fags Caused 9/11 strawberry fruit smoothie.

On a related note:

Documenting the piss-taking from everybody from Conan to John Goodman

http://www.patheos.com/blogs/slacktivist/2012/08/02/clowns-prophets-and-the-chick-fil-a-flustercluck/

And in costume:

http://m.gawker.com/5930964/john-goodman-stars-as-colonel-sanders-in-a-pro+gay-ad-for-kfc

Meanwhile, the Huckabee culture war/tribal-reinforcement day set a sales record.

Although one wonders if the long-term ramifications were worth it, with telling a bunch of people with money that they can fuck right off.

I just came here to say I love that Steve Perry gif a lot

http://www.cbsnews.com/2300-250_162-10013218.html?tag=page

can't recommend this enough

‎"Chick-fil-A team member Dakota Bibbs, center, cheers as customers aid in his search for the owner of an order ready for pick-up"

"Weston Stoler explains that his panda bear hat was the closest thing he could find that looked like a cow as he waited in line for over an hour outside the Decatur, Ala., Chick-fil-A restaurant, Aug. 1, 2012."

"Antoine Dodson gives his views on Chick-fil-A outside the Whitesburg Drive location in Huntsville, Ala., Aug. 1, 2012."

this fucking country, i swear

that entire photoessay is fucking terrifying

http://www.cbsnews.com/2300-250_162-10013218-36.html?tag=page

idk, Rahm Emanuel seems like a motherfucker with some dark secrets, he might eat all kinds of birds

at least Huck knows a semicolon from honey mustard

would love to hear the conversations that took place while these motherfuckers had to stand in line for ~1 hr to get a chicken sandwich. do they stick with it so that the company gets their SUPPORT? for the EXPERIENCE? to prove to someone that they're committed? so they can get the picture of themselves holding the chicken sandwich at the end?

occupy chicken sandwich

to prove to someone that they're committed?

This. Remember, this shit is tribalism. Celebration & reinforcement of the in-group, denigration of the out-group. Loudly shouting to yourself and your neighbors of your stance. Repping for your team no what heinous shit they did or how wrong they are. Being part of an exciting thing that you can join in with your friends.

i know otherwise extraordinarily nice folks who think this is a good idea and it makes my veins bulge

Same here.

Is the kiss-a-thon happening today?

http://blog.mywonderfulworld.org/2009/02/11/Little_Rock_Desegregation_1957.jpg

"hey grandad did you go to chick-fil-a on august 1, 2012?"

"ummm, well... see, i..."

What happens when progressive evangelists write about this stuff:

So please stop redefining Christianity as a superficial cultural tribe that self-identifies through its particular tastes in facial hair, “relevant” fashion, political stances, and the culture war loyalty test of the week (despite what it says in the picture your friend shared with you on facebook, you really won’t burn in hell if you don’t share it with 10 other people). Instead of all the superficial tribalism, be disciples who take a stand against your own sin. Be evangelists who are acutely attentive to navigating around other peoples’ stumbling blocks and loving them into the truth. Be witnesses of the beauty you have seen in Jesus Christ. Don’t let anyone trick you into being any less.

Problem is, plenty of folks are by nature far more into marching behind a standard, any standard carried by their authority figures their entire culture, personality, and upbringing have hardwired obedience into. Works the same with a national flag. What the standard or flag means don't mean shit, it's about marching behind it.

These dudes are "Christian" as a brand name only; theyre much more into following the State Religion of the Empire than listening to some dude who said hey we should actually care about poor people. The tenets of the religion don't mean squat, group affiliation does.

Whenever rightwing doofuses pop up to make proclamations about why they're doing what they're doing, I just replace the word "Christian" with "Ohio State," and it makes far more sense.

i know otherwise extraordinarily nice folks who think this is a good idea and it makes my veins bulge

Yeah, people are complicated and plenty of smart people believe things for decidedly non-smart reasons. I know folks who believe in new age medical bollocks and libertarianism, and it's the same reaction.

i was on a plane the other day and sat next to a 10-year-old Unaccompanied Minor girl and she was telling me about her school and was like "it's a christian school but i dunno some of the kids don't act very christian" and i was like lol welcome to earth

thumbing through your copy of Lolita

she was thumbing through her copy of emma actually

I was going to start rewriting "Don't You Want Me" around this scenario but I got to "you were thumbing through your Emma in an airplane seat" and all my BAD IDEA alarms went off

you were thumbing through your Emma in an airplane seat
when I met you
you lectured me
you preached to me
I laughed you off
my little boo

"it's a christian school but i dunno some of the kids don't act very christian"

Exactly. This. The term is a marketing/tribal/brand name you use to sell shitty pop music to rightwing authoritarian followers. It has dick-all to do with the source of the name or paying attention to the teachings of some itinerant revolutionary rabbi who had some good ideas tromping around Asia Minor during the reign of Tiberius.

It's one of the reasons I don't identify myself as "Christian", but rather as "drunken Protestant" or "loosely Presbyterian"

idk who gets to determine what "acting Christian" means, does it just mean acting like the ideals? pretty sure people confuse "you are supposed to do this" with "you will act like this at all times because you are infallible"

there's a noticeable difference between "I try to live up to these ideals but sometimes I make mistakes" and "I pay lip service to these ideals but never follow them because I am a gigantic ass"

i think she just meant people were being dicks more than they had to be

lol

Right, wot Dan said.

Posted to my facebook today re Chik-Fil-A: Hey...let's eat water intensive meat during a drought to celebrate our homophobia....

Christianity = "Boy, I sure am a sinner. I should ask every day for forgiveness."

"Christianity" = "Boy, you sure are a sinner. You should ask every day for forgiveness. I, on the other hand, have a Jesus fish on my car."

Hey...let's eat water intensive meat during a drought to celebrate our homophobia....

I think you mean "homophilia." At least that's my experience.

Homo-Fil-A

this whole thing is really reminding me of the terry shiavo thing for some reason

because it's so fucking stupid, is the reason, probably.

Yes, and it's another skirmish for people desperately wanting to prove that they're not victims of modernity by bolstering themselves and loudly chanting their tribal affinity and righteousness to drown out any possible internal doubt or anxiety.

Check the Slacktivist link I posted a coupla days ago; American conservative/Republican/evangelical culture is _all_ about declaring the correct Stances, and ostracizing those who don't reaffirm some plank as zealously as others.

Looks like from that picture gallery there is a competition about which congressman can prove they are the most "conservative" by having the most chick fil a bags on their desks.

Feel like this is the Stand with Chik-Fil-A standing in for Las Vegas.

Here, this gawker bit is good:

All Meals Are Possible Through Christ: Hate-Bingeing on the Chicken

...People gathered to celebrate the wonder-working power of redemption through Christ—which, instead of what all those pipe-organ songs seem to suggest, is cause for intense, simmering resentment.

[....]

Indeed, you could be forgiven for assuming that this was solely a protest in favor of religion, but it was as much about Free Market Jesus as it was about the original version, with the poor people and the repudiation of material things. A large motivating factor for the Chick-Fil-A celebrants was aggrieved rhetoric from the far right that portrayed gay activist groups as violating or suppressing the First Amendment in two ways. One, that citizens boycotting a business constitutes active suppression of speech, and that Obama/The Gays/The Left were "criminalizing" pro-Christian speech. Two, that the original text of the First Amendment read, "Congress shall make no law abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press, or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, unless that speech or assembly affects a corporation's bottom line."

i ate at CFA on wednesday but didnt find out until afterwards that it was hate-a-homo day. it wasnt any busier than it usually is at lunchtime on a weekday. i ate there the next day too