pooping while on the phone

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is better than peeing while on the phone because they can't hear the moaning and splashing sound.

CaptainLorax, Thursday, 27 September 2007 16:31 (sixteen years ago) link

hang on you moan whilst peeing

Just got offed, Thursday, 27 September 2007 16:32 (sixteen years ago) link

it is a sex pee

Just got offed, Thursday, 27 September 2007 16:32 (sixteen years ago) link

its like a sigh of relief

CaptainLorax, Thursday, 27 September 2007 16:32 (sixteen years ago) link

best thread ever

Mr. Que, Thursday, 27 September 2007 16:32 (sixteen years ago) link

I suppose peeing is similar to sex in that they both offer relief

CaptainLorax, Thursday, 27 September 2007 16:33 (sixteen years ago) link

I gotta go, later UNGHGHGHGHH

CaptainLorax, Thursday, 27 September 2007 16:34 (sixteen years ago) link

best thread ever

for those with exceedingly low standards in such matters

Aimless, Thursday, 27 September 2007 16:35 (sixteen years ago) link

Not everybody can hang out on AAD writing poetry like you mister

El Tomboto, Thursday, 27 September 2007 16:41 (sixteen years ago) link

Nevertheless, they should have a better grasp of their inadequacies, sir. We AskADrunkites know enough not to roll in just any old dungheap. We insist on nothing but the best.

Aimless, Thursday, 27 September 2007 16:45 (sixteen years ago) link

you don't get poop sounds?

cutty, Thursday, 27 September 2007 17:15 (sixteen years ago) link

If anyone would be discreet about laying cable, I'd-a thunk it'd be cutty.

libcrypt, Thursday, 27 September 2007 17:17 (sixteen years ago) link

Or maybe THIS is the reason he doesn't poop at work: cutty shitting is a multimedia experience.

libcrypt, Thursday, 27 September 2007 17:18 (sixteen years ago) link

i'm saying the people at work have a multitude of poop sounds

cutty, Thursday, 27 September 2007 17:20 (sixteen years ago) link

and i don't want to hear those sounds

cutty, Thursday, 27 September 2007 17:20 (sixteen years ago) link

my shits have been flawless lately, quiet, firm, not much on the toilet paper--finish with a moist wipe

cutty, Thursday, 27 September 2007 17:21 (sixteen years ago) link

Whoever gets the phone, just say, "They can't talk, they're twisting off a log." This is what my dad would say; honor they father & mother & such.

Abbott, Thursday, 27 September 2007 17:22 (sixteen years ago) link

my roommate does this and what makes it worse that i can hear both the bathroom sounds and the phone call through my wall

jeff, Thursday, 27 September 2007 17:22 (sixteen years ago) link

http://www.areyougoingtoeatthat.com/images/Spock.jpg

Noodle Vague, Thursday, 27 September 2007 17:23 (sixteen years ago) link

(xxxpost)

http://i21.tinypic.com/5p4fv4.jpg

StanM, Thursday, 27 September 2007 17:23 (sixteen years ago) link

I have had a few must-answer cell phone calls come in while I was already sitting on the toilet, I admit that much. I then have to wait till the call is over to do anything telltale like flush, run sink, etc.

Can't imagine calling someone while athrone, no way.

Imagining this happening in the pre-cordless era of landlines is giving me a laugh...

Jon Lewis, Thursday, 27 September 2007 17:24 (sixteen years ago) link

boldface on "entirely liquid" = classic

Jon Lewis, Thursday, 27 September 2007 17:25 (sixteen years ago) link

That could just as easily be "Bristol Penis Chart".

libcrypt, Thursday, 27 September 2007 17:25 (sixteen years ago) link

Amy Sedaris says to say you're having a hard time opening a jar. That would not explain the splashback foley, however.

Abbott, Thursday, 27 September 2007 17:25 (sixteen years ago) link

"Splashback Foley" = criminally slept-on jam rock band

Jon Lewis, Thursday, 27 September 2007 17:26 (sixteen years ago) link

i'm saying the people at work have a multitude of poop sounds

-- cutty, Thursday, September 27, 2007 6:20 PM (5 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

and i don't want to hear those sounds

-- cutty, Thursday, September 27, 2007 6:20 PM (4 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

OTMFM

Mark C, Thursday, 27 September 2007 17:26 (sixteen years ago) link

How the fuck do you get the phone near the toilet? I mean, do you, while chatting merrily on the phone, think to yourself:"Hmm, need to go do a poopoo." and then proceed to go the toilet? Or do you have your significant other open the toilet and hand over the phone while you're twisting out a poopoo? Either way, you guys are mental if you do.

stevienixed, Thursday, 27 September 2007 17:42 (sixteen years ago) link

cutty shitting is a multimedia experience.

This sentence has completely brightened my day.

HI DERE, Thursday, 27 September 2007 17:42 (sixteen years ago) link

it's more interpretive dancing than multimedia experience

cutty, Thursday, 27 September 2007 17:44 (sixteen years ago) link

I really need to stop reading Cutty's comments on this thread. Icky POOPOO.

stevienixed, Thursday, 27 September 2007 17:45 (sixteen years ago) link

cause you are laughing too hard or i am making you have to poop it out?

cutty, Thursday, 27 September 2007 17:47 (sixteen years ago) link

laugh till you poop

carne asada, Thursday, 27 September 2007 17:49 (sixteen years ago) link

DP OTM

Dandy Don Weiner, Thursday, 27 September 2007 17:50 (sixteen years ago) link

I hope Cutty never finds out what they do in India.

Wrinklepaws, Thursday, 27 September 2007 18:03 (sixteen years ago) link

tell us what they do in India, Wrinklepaws

gff, Thursday, 27 September 2007 18:10 (sixteen years ago) link

Yes please, Wrinklepaws. There are too many search results for "India" on http://www.poopreport.com/ :-(

StanM, Thursday, 27 September 2007 18:14 (sixteen years ago) link

indefensible

Alex in NYC, Thursday, 27 September 2007 18:15 (sixteen years ago) link

they wipe their ass with guess toilet papers

cutty, Thursday, 27 September 2007 18:15 (sixteen years ago) link

while faxing imprints of their poopoo no doubt

stevienixed, Thursday, 27 September 2007 18:23 (sixteen years ago) link

eating while pooping

carne asada, Thursday, 27 September 2007 18:24 (sixteen years ago) link

http://www.mustangworld.com/forums/showthread.php?t=504336

Curt1s Stephens, Thursday, 27 September 2007 20:06 (sixteen years ago) link

I used to never poop while on the phone, but now that I work in a building where the bathroom is practically the only place with a decent cellphone signal I do it way too often.

Alex in Baltimore, Tuesday, 2 October 2007 23:57 (sixteen years ago) link

beach boys - poop sound

ken c, Wednesday, 3 October 2007 00:52 (sixteen years ago) link

nine months pass...

a friend of mine at work once said she was in the ladies room and was scolding her daughter and that every 2-3 seconds or so, there was a loud audible "plop" coming from the stall.

"You know you (plop) weren't supposed to go to (plop) Jenny's house until (plop plop) AFTER dinner!"

seriously, wtf--it couldn't wait until AFTER you bombed hiroshima?

Bo Jackson Overdrive, Wednesday, 30 July 2008 04:35 (fifteen years ago) link

to clarify, my friend wasn't the one plopping...just a random person in the ladies room stall

Bo Jackson Overdrive, Wednesday, 30 July 2008 04:36 (fifteen years ago) link

thanks for the crucial clarification

BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Wednesday, 30 July 2008 04:43 (fifteen years ago) link

ploppage

libcrypt, Wednesday, 30 July 2008 05:23 (fifteen years ago) link

was trying to work a "ploppelganger" pun into this but couldn't make it work.

RabiesAngentleman, Wednesday, 30 July 2008 10:09 (fifteen years ago) link


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