oreo pizza: WTF

guys this looks delicious

I think the issue is that pizza chains are working with materials that aren't even 10% as sophisticated as a Taco Bell: they just have endless freezer/vat supplies of dough/sauce/cheese and a few vacuum bags of toppings, and then they run them through a conveyor-belt oven. Anything else they want to serve you has to be crappy enough to fit into a system with no real kitchen and no real ingredients -- it pretty much has to come straight out of a bag. Half the time it doesn't even come out, and you get a sealed plastic packet at home. These people just aren't in any position to pretend to be able to make anything other than cheap pizza.

Now, see, a McDonald's, at least they've got a deep-fryer, and a bunch of microwaves, and stuff! They've got the tools to actually pretend to do stuff, now and then!

this thread otm what hath man wrought! can't wait til pizza technology achieves sentience and forcefeeds us all the cheese jizz enemas we so clearly desire. dassa spicy meatball! LOL

Yeah but why can't they stuff the crust with just regular pizza cheese?

otm x 1000

the stuffing is the problem. stop being gross

Is the stuffing supposed to be ricotta-ish?

Yeah, sort of, except it's obviously not ricotta--it's like they took a fast food approach (make everything greasier, tastier) to making something that's a bit of classier and ended up in no man's land.

I like what you were thinking, Pizza Hut; I too have dreamt about having melted cheese ooze out of everything into which I bite. But it can't be just any melted cheese, oh no. IF YOU'RE GONNA DO SOMETHING, DO IT RIGHT.

should read: "it's like they took a fast food approach (make everything greasier, tastier) to imitating something that's a bit classier"

OLIVE GARDEN TAKE NOTE

Oreos are terrible already, on a pizza with that goo they look frightening.

Its funny though, an old pizza restaurant from my hometown thats been around since the early 70s used to have a dessert pizza on its menu. It was a thin crust and it had cream cheese, sultanas and cinammon/icing sugar. Kind of morroccan or something I guess.

I never tried one though.

i misspoke, the act of stuffing things into the crawlspaces of the pizza is the problem. do people not know they can buy cheese all by itself, in big solid blocks? totally legal, have at it! let poor pizza hut concentrate on getting actual pizza right.

Just out of curiosity, how unpalatable is Olive Garden's food? The worst restaurant of that ilk that I've ever eaten at was Applebee's.

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

Olive Garden is perfectly fine. So is Applebee's, really, if they don't screw anything up.

I just got xposted by a MACHINE

Also, am I totally off in remembering Pizza Hut's food as being pretty good up through, say, the early '90's? I have a feeling that they took a serious dive south in the last dozen years or so. But maybe a distorted memory plus my then-youthful and inexperienced young palate make for a loss of credibility points in asserting this to be the case.

BAN TREMENDOID

Well, I've had one meal in my life at Applebee's and it was pretty wretched, and basically seemed like the kind of thing that couldn't be screwed up (it was fish and chips-- so I assume that it's the kind of thing that they just dig out of the vacuum-sealed bag and throw into a fryer...

xxp The beginning of the end was that huge 'monster' pizza they started selling, the cheese on that was inedible. I don't think they went wholesale to that type of cheese(they wouldn't still be in business) but a bunch of changes were made to the cheese and consistency of the pizzas, to the point that now their default pizza is all sloppy like a hot pocket turned inside out. not my thing.

I think, also, that they stopped putting beer in the cheese.

then-youthful and inexperienced young palate

durr. Hunger-induced tautology.

Thanks, tremedoid. That would make sense; the lower-quality cheese thing and probably adjustments to the crust recipe and stuff. I had a couple of slices at a friend's place earlier in the year, and it was not what I remembered it once being.

Hot pocket turned inside-out, ack!

I can't help but wonder what GARU G would have to say about the "kitty litter cake" pic upthread.

hmm.

http://inlinethumb54.webshots.com/17909/2126521250068014149S425x425Q85.jpg

http://i3.tinypic.com/525t4i0.jpg

^^ scene from Domino's test kitchen

lol looks like a still from Cronenberg's Shivers

i love oreos and oreo flavored things but this is just nasty

http://www.cookiemadness.net/ddloreos%20007.jpg

^^^^^ ¿Dondé comprar?

I'd hit it.

cakesters: y or n?

It can't be that bad.

ok this half-assed oreo pizza thing is gross and dumb but srsly - people don't like oreos??? i haven't had any in years (!) so maybe it's a childhood nostalgia thing but oreos are good! oh but also i remember american friends/aquaintances always saying that canadian oreos were like 345234 times better than american oreos. i don't think i've ever tried american oreos. wld do this taste test though.

siding with american, however, i do want to try a chocotaco one of these days and i don't think they exist here. oreo ice cream and ice cream sandwiches do though, and they are goood.

oreo milkshakes or oreos in ice cream are good

chocotacos are down by law, u have to get them with the shells properly stale and chewy = delight. oreos are alright i guess, i don't bother with them.

God the ad for this stuff is so fucking disgusting. Sorry I'm late to the party.

taco bell should come out with a rasberry chalupa! i don't even like rasberry anything but it rolls off the tongue really well.
it's spelled 'raspberry'?!

oreos are great, rrobyn!

the shells properly stale and chewy

I had never previously realized how absolutely key and true this is! Once these things have been sitting around for a while ... it's like the shells have been infused with butterscotch.

b/c of ilx:
1. i have watched all of 'sex and the city' and
2. now all i want are oreos and chocotacos
effing bastards

Mmmmmm, petrified dung.

http://snacks.cyberpunks.org/chocotaco.html

so i bought oreos for the first time in like 10 years (?) and liked the first two enough to eat two more and then the weird chemical after-taste hit me but then i ate two more anyway just to make sure and then i felt really GROSS
i didn't know what to do so i just drank some decaf chai and waited for the ill to pass
ugh
this was hours ago and i still feel weird

i am watching terminator 3

whoa my god lemme get those dulce de leche oreos

Are there healthy / vegan oreos that are any good?

THOSE DULCE DE LECHE OREOS ARE HEAVEN

AND VEGAN OREOS ARE AN ABOMINATION IN THE EYES OF OUR LORD

for my birthday this year i'm going to make a pizza topped with tacos and sushi

http://fasthugs.typepad.com/blog/images/2007/09/18/cakesters_3.gif

HMM