Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull?!?? We can do better than THAT!

wow. dreadful film, pretty in places. script confused itself, and plot kinda seemed spliced together from three or four bad ideas.

i loved loved loved the opening scene of this flick anyone else?

I loved the opening sequence. Best part of the film. After the great "welcome to the nuclear age, Indy" mushroom cloud shot the film goes gradually downhill. Still, I did not hate the movie by any means.

CGI prairie dogs excepted.

My friend sent me a copy of Frank Darabont's script, the one he slaved over for a year with Spielberg before Lucas's people hacked it to pieces. Suffice to say that it is 1000x better than what showed up on the screen, even as it covers similar ground. It's much more nuanced and funny and suspenseful. It's by no means perfect, but oh what could have been.

prolly not hacky enough for lucas.

"Frank,

I can't use this draft, sorry. You left out the prairie dogs I asked for in the memo. WTF, dude? You realize that's the only fucking reason I wanted to do another Indy sequel. Stop pissing on my dream!"

"PS Here's your check and a storm trooper helmet full of Jar Jar pez dispensers. Good Luck on your next project, you rodent-leaving-out prick."

I still think it went downhill after the Indy + mushroom cloud shot (which was really awesome).

Ha ha "The Frank Darabont original was better" is like a now-legendary meme at the comment boards for The Onion AV Club.

i was really surprised when indy died in the fridge in that first sequence.

The whole opening salvo up to Indy being sillouhetted by the a-bomb (the sole contender for an iconic image from the movie) was expertly paced and very atmospheric. Went to shit after that.

chap OTM

Those guys who popped out of nowhere with the blowpipes in the tomb bit weren't given one jot of explanation.

-- chap, Friday, 6 June 2008 13:20 (Friday, 6 June 2008 13:20)

Chap again! I also wondered what happened to the second guy. Why didn't he just kill them in the corridor?

Also I was a bit miffed at the following: If a magnetic tape is being used to record Indy would it not be wise to take it away from the big giant skull magnet thing? Ditto radio waves. How did the radios work so close to that thing? Small point but it irritated me!

Also who reset the temple after Oxley and conquistadores had gone?

This post:

Just saw this, and I have to pretty much agree...Now it felt like a total anticlimax.

-- Tuomas, Thursday, 12 June 2008 13:18 (Thursday, 12 June 2008 13:18)

Had me nodding along. Well put Tuomas

Ha ha "The Frank Darabont original was better" is like a now-legendary meme at the comment boards for The Onion AV Club

Wow. I thought Darabont was also jobbed on the script for MI:3 -- I saw some interview where I swear he was talking about living above Tom Cruise's garage for a few months, writing during the day & going over scenes w/ TC @ night.

Note to filmmakers -- please stop w/ the "innocent bystander" / comedy relief cut-aways during action sequences, especially if they involve furry animals or janitors.

Note to filmmakers -- please stop w/ the "innocent bystander" / comedy relief cut-aways during action sequences, especially if they involve furry animals or janitors.

I blame Richard Lester and his "OMG that dude just got an ice cream cone blown into his face ZROFL!!1!" hixink in "Superman II" for this.

It did work in Superman II though.

This thing has been around ever since the legendary "street merchant whose fruit cart gets smashed in the action" cliché of old. Probably dates back to slapstick movies of the silent era or something.

Ha ha "The Frank Darabont original was better" is like a now-legendary meme at the comment boards for The Onion AV Club

So how long before "Frank Wrote First" shirts appear?

....

^^^ setting up the cafepress page

If anyone wants to read the Darabont version, send me an email.

Yeah but now think about just how bad this movie could've been if Frank Darabont directed!

he can do the LeBoeuf one(s).

What an awful fucking movie. I didn't expect much, but I didn't realize it was a trainwreck. No wonder Harrison Ford was embarrassed to be a part of it. Horrible dialog, ridiculous plot, numerous plot holes, unfunny "jokes", way too much CGI, just bad bad bad.

As a total aside, if you need some Cold War CIA/KGB paranormal mysticism get a copy of Tim Powers' Declare immediately.

-- Elvis Telecom, Thursday, May 29, 2008 10:57 PM (1 month ago) Bookmark Link

gotta second this!

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Meth?

If this was "awful," I wonder what the recent Mummy movies etc are. Srsly, curb the hyperbole.

I'm sorry, "awful" is the best word to describe this movie. I'm fairly certain the new Mummy movie can't be as bad as this.

let me know if it has one shot to equal the mushroom cloud or the Ark insert.

I didn't say I'll be seeing it, but I'm betting the dialog won't be quite as laughably bad as Indy 4. And the CGI effects will probably be a little better integrated.

I'm sorry, I just can't really get into a movie with complete disregard for a sensible plot, incompetent acting, and "humor" involving someone getting repeatedly hit in the nuts.

Indy beats Get Smart on all those counts.

Don't care to see that one either. I'm not saying its the worst movie of all time, but it wasn't fun at all and I feel stupid for having spent $9.50 to see it.

who got hit in the nuts? Shia?

Several times.

i blocked it out, i guess. i dunno, i figure with this kind of movie, people are going to get hit in the nuts, but hey, then there's a motorcycle chase through a library and killer ants. so i'm good.

any of the mummy movies i've seen were better than this

"awful" is not hyperbolic for kingdom of crystal skull

this movie was about ten times better than the mummy or national treasure flicks imo. it was dumb but still entertaining, though maybe i think i'd think it sucked if i was measuring it up to a couple of the previous series entries. otherwise it was better than i thought it would be. not bad for a 19 year gap, i guess. loved the nuke scene and the jungle chase.

maybe i think i'd think

some of you folx need new eyes.

did this bomb or what? everything I read/heard about it has been terrible

everyone i know has either said it's terrible or just okay, nobody has said it's been great yet

Shakey, it's grossed $300 M domestically, I sincerely doubt the neg cost was that high.

neg cost was only in goodwill for all parties involved except for, like Karen Allen.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20080709/sc_afp/sciencearchaeologyentertainmentfilmskull

shocking news

Indiana Jones and the D'OH!

Morbius's love of Spielberg knows no bounds.

Morbs sort of hated this movie, but don't let that change anyone's story.

indiana jones and the kingdom of the cubic zirconia foil skull

Morbs sort of hated this movie, but don't let that change anyone's story.

He did not hate it enough.

REVIVE. haha! Watched this again on dvd last night (after one viewing in theatre last summer) and enjoyed it much more second time around. Will still never match up to the first two (eff the third one. Always hated it.) but was just some good ol' cartoon nonsense when watched on the small screen. Still looks like it was filmed in "SWPrequelVision" for the most part, though. I give Spielberg the benefit of the doubt here as I could hear Lucas say " Hey! We've got this tech now! Why go to the Amazon?" as I watched. I'm sure his nuts were tied.