Sex vs. cuddling

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I say cuddling, with sex as a close second. I think I miss cuddling more than sex when I'm not in an intimate relationship.

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Sunday, 26 March 2006 12:27 (twenty years ago)

OTM

― Mitya (mitya), Sunday, 26 March 2006 12:33 (twenty years ago)

Duh.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Sunday, 26 March 2006 12:35 (twenty years ago)

Hey, do both!

― mark grout (mark grout), Sunday, 26 March 2006 13:13 (twenty years ago)

"have your cock and eat it too"

― Forksclovetofu (Forksclovetofu), Sunday, 26 March 2006 17:42 (twenty years ago)

Kissing and cuddling and holding hands vs. ejaculating deep into your partner's rectum whilst they are gagged and bound: FITE!
It's a toss up.

― David Orton (scarlet), Sunday, 26 March 2006 17:54 (twenty years ago)

one word: ew.

― Gilbert O'Sullivan (kenan), Sunday, 26 March 2006 17:59 (twenty years ago)

The talk
The sex
Somebody to trust
The Audi TT
The house on the Vineyard
The house on the gulf coast
These are the things I miss the most

― Gilbert O'Sullivan (kenan), Sunday, 26 March 2006 18:01 (twenty years ago)

sex takes too much work sometimes. cuddling is a pretty lazy pleasure. ergo, cuddling is better.

― ryan (ryan), Sunday, 26 March 2006 18:01 (twenty years ago)

This is a false dichotomy; both cuddling and lots of messy sex are essential. One without the other is completely unacceptable.

I hear that white guys with guitars prefer cuddling and that some even have Tshirts that say so. I love cuddling, but don't think I am not about to accept the label of "cuddler" any more than I would drink chamomile tea in public.

― Daddy's Little Duder (unclejessjess), Sunday, 26 March 2006 18:50 (twenty years ago)

Now a long steamy tonguey slobbery kiss, that might beat stand a chance at challenging cuddling and sex....

― Daddy's Little Duder (unclejessjess), Sunday, 26 March 2006 18:52 (twenty years ago)

I agree with the first post.

― jaymc (jaymc), Sunday, 26 March 2006 18:54 (twenty years ago)

I agree that cuddling is what I miss out on while not in a relationship. You can get sex anytime, but cuddling is not as easy. Though of course the average casual pick-up sex is usually pretty second rate.

― Daddy's Little Duder (unclejessjess), Sunday, 26 March 2006 19:04 (twenty years ago)

I've had some pretty bittersweet one-night cuddling stands.

― Abbott (Abbott), Sunday, 26 March 2006 22:41 (twenty years ago)

both

― Yoo Doo Nut (donut), Sunday, 26 March 2006 23:23 (twenty years ago)

christ

― sunny successor (katharine), Sunday, 26 March 2006 23:45 (twenty years ago)

this is just me, but the two were just meant to be done together imho... not necessarily ALL the time, but I mean, sex with zero body contact occasionally can be hot, but hearing people saying "sex is so easy to get, but cuddling is not" kinda disturbs me. This isn't a "PLUR" type thing I'm talking about.. it's just physical primal common sense. I couldn't sustain a physical relationship with anyone who didn't want to be cuddled at least in private. (publicly, whatever, I don't require PDA)

― Yoo Doo Nut (donut), Monday, 27 March 2006 00:12 (twenty years ago)

Yeh I agree. Again, I don't get the either/or set up of this question.

Even when you hook up there's usually some cuddling, but it's really not the same. It's abbreviated and sort of meh.

christ

that was my initial reaction to this post.

― Daddy's Little Duder (unclejessjess), Monday, 27 March 2006 05:04 (twenty years ago)

"sex with zero body contact"?????

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Monday, 27 March 2006 05:30 (twenty years ago)

cybersex maybe. although i've never grasped the concept of that either.

― gem (trisk), Monday, 27 March 2006 05:34 (twenty years ago)

Donut's coming to Sydney to check out the glory holes.

― kit brash (kit brash), Monday, 27 March 2006 06:25 (twenty years ago)

Being touched by another person is satifying by itself. Especially if they're scratching your back.

Back scratches >> cuddling >> sex

― Gilbert O'Sullivan (kenan), Monday, 27 March 2006 06:33 (twenty years ago)

http://www.inaddition.com.au/images/Orgasmatron_Product.gif >> sex

― phil-two (phil-two), Monday, 27 March 2006 06:41 (twenty years ago)

What's in a kiss, our Gilbert?

(Were you in Wire?)

― mark grout (mark grout), Monday, 27 March 2006 06:55 (twenty years ago)

What's in a kiss, our Gilbert?

Kissing is roughly equal to sex. It's all about slippery things and exchanging fluids.

― Gilbert O'Sullivan (kenan), Monday, 27 March 2006 06:58 (twenty years ago)

Is it more than just one moment of bliss?

― mark grout (mark grout), Monday, 27 March 2006 07:18 (twenty years ago)

Or is it a case of underneath the blanket, go?

― Marcello Carlin (nostudium), Monday, 27 March 2006 07:49 (twenty years ago)

Donut's coming to Sydney to check out the glory holes.

glory ho's!

I'm with Trayce on the "zero body contact?!!" outrage, mostly... (what I meant in that context was just the unzip-and-have-at-it thing, which is not standard gettin'-down protocol, but not unheard of.)

― Yoo Doo Nut (donut), Monday, 27 March 2006 08:56 (twenty years ago)

Told you once before, and I won't tell you no more, get down, get down, GET DOWN!

― Marcello Carlin (nostudium), Monday, 27 March 2006 09:05 (twenty years ago)

Yoo Doo Nut is otm many times.

― josh in sf (stfu kthx), Monday, 27 March 2006 09:09 (twenty years ago)

tuomas do you have sex without cuddling?

― ken c (ken c), Monday, 27 March 2006 09:16 (twenty years ago)

xxxxpost with the zero body contact thing i suppose

― ken c (ken c), Monday, 27 March 2006 09:17 (twenty years ago)

i keep reading the thread title as 'sex vs. cudding' and wondering if this is some weird chewing fetish

― gem (trisk), Monday, 27 March 2006 09:26 (twenty years ago)

tuomas do you have sex without cuddling?

No, but I have cuddling without sex, which is quite pleasurable in itself. That's why I don't think the two always go hand in hand, though they often do. Like Abbott, I've had one night cuddling-stands too.

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Monday, 27 March 2006 09:58 (twenty years ago)

Anyway, even if they'd always go in hand in hand, surely I can ask which part you like the most?

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Monday, 27 March 2006 09:59 (twenty years ago)

They're both rubbish.

― Did I Mention My PAISLEY SOCKS? (kate), Monday, 27 March 2006 10:14 (twenty years ago)

whatever

― electric sound of jim (and why not) (electricsound), Monday, 27 March 2006 10:18 (twenty years ago)

they both rock! why do we have to choose...

― gem (trisk), Monday, 27 March 2006 10:43 (twenty years ago)

i think it depends on your definition like you know if you define sex as just the bit where you stick your dick in then you have a distinction. but if you think of it as the whole deal like that usually includes cuddling and like snogging and stuff then one if a superset of another and so you know unless you actually think the dick bit is detrimental to the whole thing, then it's hard to sort of do a vs. bit. it's like "£1000 vs £1000 + a new car"

― ken c (ken c), Monday, 27 March 2006 10:50 (twenty years ago)

You can have sex with almost anyone and it be pretty good, but cuddling someone you don't like very much is no fun. Plus I'm lazy, so cuddling is good. I haven't properly done it in a while; I miss it.

― Ally C (Ally C), Monday, 27 March 2006 11:42 (twenty years ago)

Hahaha "hate cuddle"!

― Dan (Ally C Is A Modern Genius) Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 27 March 2006 12:32 (twenty years ago)

grudge cuddle

― RoxyMuzak© (roxymuzak), Monday, 27 March 2006 13:34 (twenty years ago)

or "gruddle"

― RoxyMuzak© (roxymuzak), Monday, 27 March 2006 13:34 (twenty years ago)

the orgasmotron gets tangled in my hair and is a painful experience for me.

― Ed (dali), Monday, 27 March 2006 13:37 (twenty years ago)

This is a false dichotomy.

I'm with The Duder.

― Nutsy the Squirrel (pullapartgirl), Monday, 27 March 2006 15:32 (twenty years ago)

I thought that was a joke.

― Daddy's Little Duder (unclejessjess), Monday, 27 March 2006 15:41 (twenty years ago)

donut YOU HAVE MET ME BEFORE, SO YOU MUST KNOW "TRAYCE" and "TRACER HAND" ARE TWO DIFFERENT PEOPLE. JESUS.

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Monday, 27 March 2006 15:47 (twenty years ago)

Cuddling quite often leads to sex. Sex usually ends with cuddling.

Also, why am I recently running into men who think it's cool to act wimpy and cuddly? Is it an emo thing? I think it's an emo thing.

― Daddy's Little Duder (unclejessjess), Monday, 27 March 2006 15:47 (twenty years ago)

I don't give a shit about being cool and I don't much like the term "wimpy".

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Monday, 27 March 2006 15:53 (twenty years ago)

Cuddling quite often leads to sex. Sex usually ends with cuddling.

Holy shit, I was thinking the same thing.

Cuddling is a pretty intimate thing. I'm not apt to cuddle with someone I wouldn't have sex with. Both are lovely ways to spend time and I'm a huge proponent of both as a hobby.

I think preferring one to the exclusion of the other might represent a certain discomfort with the the particular form of intimacy represented by the shunned activity. I don't think preferring cuddling to the exclusion of sex makes someone a wimp, but I would wonder what that person's issue with sexual intimacy is. Just as only wanting to fuck without any cuddling would suggest to me that person has another form of intimacy issue.

― Nutsy the Squirrel (pullapartgirl), Monday, 27 March 2006 16:13 (twenty years ago)

Skipping 71 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

haha, yes, C, the word "cuddling" or "cuddle" is just gross. The act is nice, I'll agree to that.
xpost

― rrrobyn (rrrobyn), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 16:13 (twenty years ago)

is "snuggle" any better?

― Special Agent Gene Krupa (orion), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 16:13 (twenty years ago)

er, no. not re: people anyway.

― rrrobyn (rrrobyn), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 16:15 (twenty years ago)

maybe I feel like it's too childish/twee? images of teddy bears, etc, something really ineffectual about it (the words) that bothers me.

― rrrobyn (rrrobyn), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 16:17 (twenty years ago)

snoggling

― Dr Morbius (Dr Morbius), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 16:18 (twenty years ago)

Kangaroo care! In a non-creepy, not-inappropriate-for-adults way.

― Laurel (Laurel), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 16:20 (twenty years ago)

"Cuddle" is too simple a word to describe what I think we're talking about. A "cuddle" IS a very child-oriented act - something you do to make a kid feel safe/protected. That's not to say it doesn't serve, to a certain extent, the same purpose in a relationship, just that there's more too it than that. Stuff to do with "connections" and "intimacy" which don't really fit into the meaning of the word "cuddle".

― uptoeleven (uptoeleven), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 16:22 (twenty years ago)

Although maybe they do. Fuck, I don't know what my problem with the word is.

― uptoeleven (uptoeleven), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 16:22 (twenty years ago)

spooning just sounds like feeding the elderly.

― Special Agent Gene Krupa (orion), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 16:25 (twenty years ago)

Cuddling =/= coddling.

Cuddling is delightful, coddling is insulting. Don't let a little vowel disrupt your enjoyment of a good, close cuddle.

― The Milkmaid (82375538-A) (The Milkmaid), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 16:25 (twenty years ago)

sexeling

― rrrobyn (rrrobyn), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 16:26 (twenty years ago)

intimatelying

― rrrobyn (rrrobyn), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 16:26 (twenty years ago)

Amanada, why coddling = insulting?? Peel me a grape etc!

― Laurel (Laurel), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 16:30 (twenty years ago)

I guess it's not entirely insulting, but I don't enjoy being coddled...although I do enjoy coddling others. I retract that. But I just wanted to point out that cuddling and coddling might be getting confused. Also, I would prefer to peel my own grapes.

― The Milkmaid (82375538-A) (The Milkmaid), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 16:32 (twenty years ago)

Cuddle IS a terrible word though. It's reminiscent of unicorns or something.

― Allyzay Rofflesberger (allyzay), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 16:32 (twenty years ago)

My favorite use of the word:

"Give us a cuddle, Maurice", in Secrets and Lies

― Collardio Gelatinous (collardio), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 16:33 (twenty years ago)

http://members.aol.com/alligatorjuice88/bears1.jpg

― jaymc (jaymc), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 16:35 (twenty years ago)

OK the logo actually looked like that? Jesus.

― Allyzay Rofflesberger (allyzay), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 16:38 (twenty years ago)

Coddling is awesome if you make a space where it belongs and keep it there. Not cool in daily life, obv, speaking as someone who does own bike repairs and LIKES IT. But that's neither here nor there....

― Laurel (Laurel), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 16:40 (twenty years ago)

Whereas the word "sex" is more like:

http://www.antoniogenna.net/doppiaggio/telefilm/newhart.jpg

― jaymc (jaymc), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 16:42 (twenty years ago)

that's more like "making love" to me actually.

― Allyzay Rofflesberger (allyzay), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 16:44 (twenty years ago)

Haha, okay.

― jaymc (jaymc), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 16:44 (twenty years ago)

http://ssl4.westserver.net/goldmonkey/Merchant2/graphics/00000001/misfits.jpg

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 16:49 (twenty years ago)

yes THAT is the "sex" font.

― Allyzay Rofflesberger (allyzay), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 16:50 (twenty years ago)

bukkaling

― ken c (ken c), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 16:51 (twenty years ago)

But it's also the one-night stand font.
xpost

― rrrobyn (rrrobyn), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 16:52 (twenty years ago)

http://img.epinions.com/images/opti/04/0d/209607-movie.jpg-movie-resized200.jpg

― Allyzay Rofflesberger (allyzay), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 16:56 (twenty years ago)

Btw, I wasn't seriously suggesting that the Newhart font = sex. I was just looking at that Care Bears image and noticed the clouds and the curly tail on that letter B, and ... well you know the rest.

― jaymc (jaymc), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 16:58 (twenty years ago)

logical leaps + image gags, we know, we understand.

― rrrobyn (rrrobyn), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 17:00 (twenty years ago)

...and then I woke up next to Suzanne Pleshette.

― jaymc (jaymc), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 17:03 (twenty years ago)

http://images.windowsmedia.com/img/prov_i/300_80/2b983146-98d6-4c25-b039-cea3e03e398f_094634247351_800.jpg

― jaymc (jaymc), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 17:06 (twenty years ago)

Bah still too sweet.

― Laurel (Laurel), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 17:07 (twenty years ago)

I'm just riffing on the curl!

― jaymc (jaymc), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 17:08 (twenty years ago)

RIFF ON SOMETHING ELSE. Hah.

― Laurel (Laurel), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 17:10 (twenty years ago)

Also, huh-huh, "morningwood."

― jaymc (jaymc), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 17:12 (twenty years ago)

Jaymc, that's not how you're supposed to react to a single entendre.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 17:14 (twenty years ago)

I think there's maybe a quarter of another entendre in there that's somehow related to:

http://screenwriterforgod.tripod.com/sitebuildercontent/sitebuilderpictures/.pond/sausagelinks.jpg.w180h111.jpg

― jaymc (jaymc), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 17:19 (twenty years ago)

Or if that's not showing up for you:

http://media.westsideorganics.com/wso/product_pictures/big/corndogs.jpg

― jaymc (jaymc), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 17:21 (twenty years ago)

Yes, except that's the opposite of "better".

― Laurel (Laurel), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 17:23 (twenty years ago)

Hmmm?

― jaymc (jaymc), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 17:24 (twenty years ago)

maybe I feel like it's too childish/twee? images of teddy bears, etc, something really ineffectual about it (the words) that bothers me.

There is something very vital sounding about the words "hardcore hate-fuck' though. A hardcore hate-fuck is just emphatic cuddling.

― Daddy's Little Duder (unclejessjess), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 20:23 (twenty years ago)

what

― rrrobyn (rrrobyn), Tuesday, 28 March 2006 20:31 (twenty years ago)

one year passes...

Kissing and cuddling and holding hands vs. ejaculating deep into your partner's rectum whilst they are gagged and bound

what the fucking fuck

― Curt1s Stephens, Wednesday, 28 March 2007 05:39 (nineteen years ago)

Whoa. I don't remember that. Oh man, did I post that?

― Jesse, Wednesday, 28 March 2007 06:01 (nineteen years ago)

HA!

― Drooone, Wednesday, 28 March 2007 06:08 (nineteen years ago)

One Day in the Life of a Finnish Sex Tourist

― Eisbaer, Wednesday, 28 March 2007 06:21 (nineteen years ago)

What has that to do with sex vs. cuddling?

― Tuomas, Wednesday, 28 March 2007 06:37 (nineteen years ago)

its a caps lock thing

― 600, Wednesday, 28 March 2007 06:52 (nineteen years ago)

Skipping 69 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

I ROFL'ed

― kv_nol, Wednesday, 28 March 2007 09:53 (nineteen years ago)

If you're a gay guy or recreationally-broadminded female, you likely have had a good aggressive fuck once in awhile where cuddling would've been completely inappropriate. Like, while standing up.

― Dr Morbius, Wednesday, 28 March 2007 13:20 (nineteen years ago)

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