ILX quoted out of context

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This is the thread where you repost a posting from another thread that--when taken out of the context of its original thread--is either scary, funny, lewd, evil or other!

― Sean Carruthers (SeanC), Tuesday, 1 April 2003 00:47 (10 years ago) Permalink

Ha. Figures. It's been a dry couple of days, even though I've been rolling up the rim furiously.
-- Sean Carruthers (oneiro...), March 31st, 2003.

― Bryan (Bryan), Tuesday, 1 April 2003 00:51 (10 years ago) Permalink

Hey now, Sean. Let him seduce you with his trenchcoat.
-- Ned Raggett (ne...), April 1st, 2003.

― Sean Carruthers (SeanC), Tuesday, 1 April 2003 01:03 (10 years ago) Permalink

I like the idea of this thread, but sadly/happily, I think that most of the threads in their original contexts are likely to be much filthier. In the best possible sense!

― Skottie, Tuesday, 1 April 2003 03:46 (10 years ago) Permalink

I think I get taken out of context for the most innocent remarks anyway! One of the tragedies of my life.

― ChristineSH (chrissie1068), Tuesday, 1 April 2003 10:58 (10 years ago) Permalink

"Excuse me, but where are the X'O's?"
Elliott Smith to thread!

-- Jody Beth Rosen (edito...), April 1st, 2003. (later)

― felicity (felicity), Tuesday, 1 April 2003 16:03 (10 years ago) Permalink

I can never hear that phrase again without thinking of Patrick Bateman's naked body.

-- Mary (maj23...), April 15th, 2003. (later)

― felicity (felicity), Tuesday, 15 April 2003 01:39 (10 years ago) Permalink

2 weeks pass...

Oh no! What are all the chronic wiener eaters going to do?
-- Jodi (jenkyhaypatch...), April 30th, 2003 12:56

― Sean Carruthers (SeanC), Wednesday, 30 April 2003 17:19 (10 years ago) Permalink

Sean, I don't think they make buns small enough.
-- Nick A. (emmaa...), April 30th, 2003. (later) (Nick A.) (link)

― Ally (mlescaut), Wednesday, 30 April 2003 17:22 (10 years ago) Permalink

Ha!

― Nick A. (Nick A.), Wednesday, 30 April 2003 17:29 (10 years ago) Permalink

I fucking the sight of the male body.

-- Calum (ca...), April 30th, 2003.

Best.* Typo. Evah.

*"best" as in "most telling of the things going on in the subconcious of the person what posted it"*

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 30 April 2003 18:21 (10 years ago) Permalink

It's a Freudian slit, no doubt about it.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Wednesday, 30 April 2003 18:28 (10 years ago) Permalink

Damn, sorry, Freudian gymslip.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Wednesday, 30 April 2003 18:29 (10 years ago) Permalink

I want = I want someone
-- amateurist (am...), April 29th, 2003.

― Marcel Post (Marcel Post), Wednesday, 30 April 2003 23:16 (10 years ago) Permalink

god i just want to beat him around the head and neck with my dick until he passes out or it breaks off
-- jess (dubplatestyl...), April 23rd, 2003.

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Thursday, 1 May 2003 01:05 (10 years ago) Permalink

jess into turkeyslapping shocka

― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Thursday, 1 May 2003 01:08 (10 years ago) Permalink

Three beers, p'shaw! At least with grandpa, I actually make it to work tomorrow. =)
-- Kim (grimstitch...), May 1st, 2003 10:18 PM.

― Sean Carruthers (SeanC), Thursday, 1 May 2003 01:24 (10 years ago) Permalink

he also wants to fist tony robbins

― minna (minna), Thursday, 1 May 2003 02:51 (10 years ago) Permalink

Better than wanting to fist Tony Robinson. Arrrr. "That is clearly dirrrrr-ty!"

― kate, Thursday, 1 May 2003 08:16 (10 years ago) Permalink

your jetset lifestyle is impressive gareth, BUT HOW LONG CAN IT LAST
-- Ronan (ronan.fitzgerald...), April 29th, 2003. (later)

― felicity (felicity), Thursday, 1 May 2003 20:49 (10 years ago) Permalink

muff?

-- RJG (r_gillander...), May 1st, 2003.

― ailsa (ailsa), Thursday, 1 May 2003 21:13 (10 years ago) Permalink

My sister does that 'scratching-and-sniffing' thing and it drives my Dad bonkers.

--Mandee

― buttch (Oops), Thursday, 1 May 2003 21:15 (10 years ago) Permalink

does this mean i need to come clean about my gender?
-- jess (dubplatestyl...), May 2nd, 2003 10:01 AM.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Could it wait? I was enjoying having you over me.
-- felicity (felicityredwel...), May 2nd, 2003 10:04 AM.

― Trayce (trayce), Thursday, 1 May 2003 23:42 (10 years ago) Permalink

Haha! Best post of thread

― buttch (Oops), Friday, 2 May 2003 03:47 (10 years ago) Permalink

It was crying out to be used, I have to say :)

― Trayce (trayce), Friday, 2 May 2003 04:21 (10 years ago) Permalink

"I LIKE COFFEE AND SCOTCH AND SEX! I AM AN ADULT! CAN YOU BUBBLEHEADS PLEASE TONE IT DOWN A LITTLE IN HERE?"
Kenan on the I hate fun thread.

― Sarah Mclusky (coco), Friday, 2 May 2003 18:23 (10 years ago) Permalink

make that "come to"... fuck. See I can't even control my HANDS here...
-- Kim (grimstitch...), May 2nd, 2003 7:14 PM

― Sean Carruthers (SeanC), Saturday, 3 May 2003 03:25 (10 years ago) Permalink

I've never thought of Bernard Sumner's antics as fey.
-- Spencer Chow (spencercho...), February 28th, 2003. (spencermfi) (link)

― Ally (mlescaut), Sunday, 4 May 2003 05:11 (10 years ago) Permalink

I'm dead at Ypres in 1917 with the rest of you. It's a veritable mentalist holocaust.
-- amateurist (amateuris...), May 5th, 2003. (later) (amateurist) (link)

― Ally (mlescaut), Monday, 5 May 2003 15:15 (10 years ago) Permalink

Maybe it's the smoking that's causing a problem. It was fine last night. Today it's throbby and HUGE
--Ally

― buttch (Oops), Monday, 5 May 2003 18:24 (10 years ago) Permalink

I'd rather eat my sister
- Alix

Um, you're not twins are you, Alix? By any chance?

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Tuesday, 6 May 2003 18:40 (10 years ago) Permalink

My periods are all over the place. :-(
-- kate (masonicboo...), May 6th, 2003. (later)

(Confession - I took out some of this post to make it more open to misinterpretation)

― Nick A. (Nick A.), Tuesday, 6 May 2003 18:45 (10 years ago) Permalink

"...non vagina teeth..."

-- alix (lixibel...), May 6th, 2003. (alix)

This combination of words will stick with me for quite some time.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 6 May 2003 18:49 (10 years ago) Permalink

This thread makes me MAD!

-- Alex in NYC (vassife...), May 8th, 2003. (later)

― felicity (felicity), Thursday, 8 May 2003 16:58 (10 years ago) Permalink

I think I've smelled that rectum before.
-- Curtis Stephens (sevenxvii...), May 16th, 2003 2:36 PM.

― Jody Beth Rosen (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 16 May 2003 16:05 (10 years ago) Permalink

Sad to say, only Stoppard has ever really gripped me in the theatre.
-- Alan (AlanTrewarth...), May 20th, 2003. (later)

― NA. (Nick A.), Tuesday, 20 May 2003 11:47 (10 years ago) Permalink

The Real Ghostbusters are Nazi's.

-- Pete (pb1...), May 20th, 2003 6:11 AM. (Pete) (later)

― slutsky (slutsky), Tuesday, 20 May 2003 17:46 (10 years ago) Permalink

I got erection.
-- Ally (mlescau...), May 20th, 2003. (mlescaut) (later) (link)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I had a hand full of that. What did I do with it? I did it clean.
-- Alex in NYC (vassife...), May 20th, 2003. (vassifer) (later) (link)

― Ally (mlescaut), Tuesday, 20 May 2003 20:18 (10 years ago) Permalink

Every time I get an erection, the front seam of my pants violently explodes, revealing my throbbing manhood. It's really embarrassing.
-- Kenan Hebert (khebert...), May 21st, 2003. (later)

― Sarah McLUsky (coco), Wednesday, 21 May 2003 17:55 (10 years ago) Permalink

there was context to that??

― oops (Oops), Wednesday, 21 May 2003 18:03 (10 years ago) Permalink

Yeah, in context it's perfectly appropriate.

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Wednesday, 21 May 2003 18:59 (10 years ago) Permalink

It's so salty and warm...
-- jm (jimmythemo...), May 22nd, 2003. (later)

― luna (luna.c), Thursday, 22 May 2003 17:43 (10 years ago) Permalink

I hope you can see this...because I'm doing it as hard as I can.

-- Jordan (jordancohe...), May 23rd, 2003.

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 23 May 2003 16:32 (10 years ago) Permalink

If I ever get intimate with any of you, please bite me.

-- Christine "Green Leafy Dragon" Indigo (christineindig...), May 26th, 2003.

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Monday, 26 May 2003 00:13 (10 years ago) Permalink

"...you want a blow job from me, ok? ..."

-- Ally (mlescau...), May 26th, 2003 1:12 PM. (later)

― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Monday, 26 May 2003 03:15 (10 years ago) Permalink

Oi!

― Ally (mlescaut), Monday, 26 May 2003 03:22 (10 years ago) Permalink

heh

― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Monday, 26 May 2003 03:42 (10 years ago) Permalink

(reading this thread while listening to The Russian Patriarchate Choir sing 'Hymn To The Mother Of God' was a minor miracle of a multi-media experience - in a word, ILXuriant)

― t\'\'t (t\'\'t), Monday, 26 May 2003 21:24 (10 years ago) Permalink

(said to Ned on the Fred Durst thread)(hey!)

Here, let me turn on the vacuum cleaner and let you pretend it's Kevin Shields...whhiiiiirrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!

-- Anthony Miccio (anthonym...), May 27th, 2003 12:31 PM

Am I the only one to whom this sounds dirty?

― teeny (teeny), Tuesday, 27 May 2003 23:27 (10 years ago) Permalink

yet, at least text wise, that's the clean version, i believe.

― t\'\'t (t\'\'t), Tuesday, 27 May 2003 23:34 (10 years ago) Permalink

Skipping 760 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

oh burn

― The Most Typical and Popular Girl Rider (Crabbits), Monday, 1 October 2012 04:22 (8 months ago) Permalink

3 weeks pass...

oh god I can't see that as anything other than a giant foamy fountain of ejaculate now, thanks DJP
― ɥɯ ︵ (°□°) (mh), Monday, October 22, 2012

― let's have sex and then throw pottery (forksclovetofu), Monday, 22 October 2012 18:02 (7 months ago) Permalink

so innocent in context

― Author ~ Coach ~ Goddess (s1ocki), Monday, 22 October 2012 18:04 (7 months ago) Permalink

context provides referent slockster

― let's have sex and then throw pottery (forksclovetofu), Monday, 22 October 2012 18:10 (7 months ago) Permalink

I just had a really uncomfortable conversation with Ben Franklin about the joys of screwing older ladies. Let's hope that doesn't happen again.

― EZ Snappin, Wednesday, October 31, 2012 3:10 PM (5 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

― have a sandwich or ice cream sandwich (Jordan), Wednesday, 31 October 2012 20:18 (7 months ago) Permalink

haha

― thraeds of life (The Reverend), Wednesday, 31 October 2012 20:28 (7 months ago) Permalink

my mom lives 2 blocks away from the pony

― space dokken (Edward III), Wednesday, October 31, 2012 2:07 AM (16 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

― Mr. Zone A (Whiney G. Weingarten), Wednesday, 31 October 2012 23:03 (7 months ago) Permalink

where I live, the Pony is a gay bar whose interior walls are entirely covered in dicks. me and Stevie D went there together once.

― thraeds of life (The Reverend), Thursday, 1 November 2012 04:27 (7 months ago) Permalink

suck a wall of dicks

― (*・_・)ノ⌒ ☆ (Je55e), Thursday, 1 November 2012 05:29 (7 months ago) Permalink

ride the pony

― d-_-b (mh), Thursday, 1 November 2012 14:39 (7 months ago) Permalink

every time this thread is bumped i think of "she's going to brown u" and crack up

― congratulations (n/a), Thursday, 1 November 2012 14:41 (7 months ago) Permalink

I assume you're talking about The Stone Pony? Hope it's OK. :/

― ENBB, Thursday, 1 November 2012 14:41 (7 months ago) Permalink

2 months pass...

Al: IT'S NOT BIG ENOUGH!

― dyslectic Christ Brown (longneck), Saturday, January 5, 2013 4:22 PM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

― NINO CARTER, Saturday, 5 January 2013 16:24 (5 months ago) Permalink

Wish I had 25 mins with Whiney... :'(

― I just wish he hadn't adopted the "ilxor" moniker (ilxor), Friday, May 14, 2010

― buzza, Thursday, 10 January 2013 05:06 (5 months ago) Permalink

he got 25 mins on his whiney yessir

― What am I, in France? (forksclovetofu), Thursday, 10 January 2013 05:53 (5 months ago) Permalink

2 weeks pass...

fp'd your son

― ❏❐❑❒ (gr8080), Friday, January 25, 2013 4:38 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

― The Reverend, Saturday, 26 January 2013 01:46 (4 months ago) Permalink

I had Shart Pants 442 days ago.

― Jeff, Monday, January 28, 2013 11:43 AM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

― congratulations (n/a), Monday, 28 January 2013 17:46 (4 months ago) Permalink

apropos of nothing but i really did not listen to climax enough. i will now listen to climax 8 more times.

― an eagle named "small government" (call all destroyer), Monday, 28 January 2013 22:37 (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

― Mark G, Tuesday, 29 January 2013 10:12 (4 months ago) Permalink

Like a girlfriend you've spent half a decade cheating on and emotionally abusing more or less with impunity coming to you and telling you that she's dumping you because she doesnt like your new aftershave or some shit.

― Windsor Davies, dinsdag 29 januari 2013 18:59 (3 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

― Le Bateau Ivre, Tuesday, 29 January 2013 21:55 (4 months ago) Permalink

wrong thread...

OR IS IT?

― Le Bateau Ivre, Tuesday, 29 January 2013 21:56 (4 months ago) Permalink

Well, it's not the "missing verses from Alanis' Ironic" thread anyway...

― Mark G, Tuesday, 29 January 2013 23:13 (4 months ago) Permalink

Ha you pegged me - I read a lot of p4k

― Raymond Cummings, Friday, February 1, 2013 4:01 AM Bookmark

― The Reverend, Friday, 1 February 2013 18:45 (4 months ago) Permalink

by which I mean the closeted riverboat captain obviously...
except I'm not gay, haha!

― space phwoar (Hurting 2), Wednesday, February 6, 2013

― it was very clear that it's a sarcastic song (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 6 February 2013 16:59 (4 months ago) Permalink

Hitler had the right idea there (just saying)

― frogbs, Wednesday, 13 February 2013 17:13 Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

― Stop Gerrying Me! (onimo), Thursday, 14 February 2013 13:12 (4 months ago) Permalink

Im willing to bet that's in context tho

― ...to work on his autobiography, "kiddyfiddling as rome burns" (darraghmac), Thursday, 14 February 2013 13:14 (4 months ago) Permalink

I instinctively touch wood about 5 times a day.

― lo! dating (dog latin)

― christmas candy bar (al leong), Wednesday, 27 February 2013 19:55 (3 months ago) Permalink

tee hee

― set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 27 February 2013 19:56 (3 months ago) Permalink

thanks! that merkin sounds good.

― i see boy george has lost some weight (brownie), Thursday, February 28, 2013 12:09 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

― my super interesting Kant story (DJP), Thursday, 28 February 2013 17:11 (3 months ago) Permalink

of course this is stupidly insulting of songwriting and cookery

― tochter tochter, please (Noodle Vague), Thursday, February 28, 2013 10:43 AM (10 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Exactly, they're different disciplines.

― they all are afflicted with a sickness of existence (Scik Mouthy), Thursday, February 28, 2013 10:48 AM (10 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

― glumdalclitch, Thursday, 28 February 2013 21:18 (3 months ago) Permalink

2 weeks pass...

Picasso represents the horrors of war well in Guernica; "I'm Comin' Up Your Ass" is a poor substitute.

― not feeling those lighters (underrated aerosmith bootlegs I have owned), Wednesday, March 20, 2013 4:14 PM (20 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

― ☠ ☃ ☠ (mh), Wednesday, 20 March 2013 21:35 (2 months ago) Permalink

3 weeks pass...

Thanks, get bent!!

― tokyo rosemary, Thursday, April 11, 2013 1:07 AM

― mookieproof, Thursday, 11 April 2013 05:15 (2 months ago) Permalink

i'm kind of sold on the crack thing tbqh

― Doctor Casino, Thursday, April 11, 2013 1:53 AM (12 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

― media conglomerates are pedaling the same product (stevie), Thursday, 11 April 2013 13:57 (2 months ago) Permalink

2 weeks pass...

I don't even want to ask but why would they then stick a fake cock and balls onto the mannequin?

― you say potatooles (onimo), Wednesday, May 1, 2013 5:18 AM (5 hours ago)

― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 1 May 2013 18:00 (1 month ago) Permalink

Aiiiieeee. I have to say, I'm having a lot more fun with the whacking than I was before it, but I think I might burn out at some point. Mordy, I'll save my next lot of eggs up for you.

― emil.y, Friday, May 10, 2013 9:47 AM (5 seconds ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

― congratulations (n/a), Friday, 10 May 2013 14:47 (1 month ago) Permalink

So much potential in that thread. I would've chosen the "smelling a Willie" one myself.

― emil.y, Friday, 10 May 2013 14:48 (1 month ago) Permalink

So I'm still whacking. Will the app have to update to go away.

― Jeff, Friday, 10 May 2013 15:40 (1 month ago) Permalink

No visible erections, no humping of inanimate objects. Bah.

― Troughton-masked Replicant (aldo), Wednesday, 15 May 2013 13:08 Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

― The Parvenu Fucktard (onimo), Wednesday, 15 May 2013 12:17 (1 month ago) Permalink

lol

― set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 15 May 2013 15:25 (1 month ago) Permalink

afternoon periods are tough, too. but you should enjoy this time of year!
― the late great, Thursday, May 16, 2013

― utilizing my famously feline agility to seek managerial succor (forksclovetofu), Thursday, 16 May 2013 20:40 (1 month ago) Permalink

apologies in advance

― utilizing my famously feline agility to seek managerial succor (forksclovetofu), Thursday, 16 May 2013 20:40 (1 month ago) Permalink

quoting 77 on ile, see you after the ban expires

― tweeship journey to 51 (mh), Thursday, 16 May 2013 20:46 (1 month ago) Permalink

http://www.cbsnews.com/video/watch/?id=2715238n

― utilizing my famously feline agility to seek managerial succor (forksclovetofu), Thursday, 16 May 2013 20:47 (1 month ago) Permalink

i mean there's a documentary about the drummer from Hole so why not Death?

― unfinest DN (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Wednesday, 29 May 2013 16:04 (7 minutes ago) Permalink

― THIS IS NOT A BENGHAZI T-SHIRT (Hurting 2), Wednesday, 29 May 2013 16:13 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

i think shakey is pretty fantastic up through the early 80s

― seasonal hugs (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Wednesday, October 24, 2012 6:01 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

― THIS IS NOT A BENGHAZI T-SHIRT (Hurting 2), Thursday, 30 May 2013 02:26 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

also I have to say I have a soft spot for balls

― w⚓f♠ (wins), Saturday, June 8, 2013 12:33 PM (1 hour ago)

― post-op1 (electricsound), Saturday, 8 June 2013 03:38 (1 week ago) Permalink

:-D

― w⚓f♠ (wins), Saturday, 8 June 2013 03:39 (1 week ago) Permalink

lol awesome truth bomb right here. DP is the best.

― Airwrecka Bliptrap Blapmantis (ENBB), Monday, June 10, 2013 1:12 AM (14 hours ago)

― sjuttiosju_u (wins), Monday, 10 June 2013 15:32 (1 week ago) Permalink

:-D

― wince (imago), Monday, 10 June 2013 16:23 (1 week ago) Permalink

tits umbrella raises a good point

― sjuttiosju_u (wins), Monday, June 10, 2013 4:25 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

this one is almost a good pun

― i don't even have an internet (Hurting 2), Monday, 10 June 2013 21:44 (1 week ago) Permalink

^would eat some hamenuts

― precious bonsai children of new york (Jordan), Wednesday, June 12, 2013 6:13 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

― i don't even have an internet (Hurting 2), Wednesday, 12 June 2013 22:24 (6 days ago) Permalink

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