My mother's incredibly stupid ex-husband

I love my dad too. He doesn't like sports (other than Duke basketball, ugh), but he loves music as much as me. It's all we can talk about, unless he's drunk (then he suddenly "loves" me and whatnot).

(chortle)

dude needs to try harder:

http://www.rdwarf.com/~mnoel/face25.4.4.02.jpg

He also said that it's been scientifically proven that Salvadorans work harder than Mexicans. So he has enemies.

At least two have opened recently in DC. There was one in Rockville when I was growing up, but I don't know if it's still there.

Chain restaurant based around selling "gourmet" hamburgers or something.

That needed to be shouted.

Find a Fudds

"Hey, do you know who this is?" he'd ask.

"No, who?" I'd say.

"Guess Who."

"I don't know, who?"

"Guess Who."

"I don't know, who?"

"Guess Who."

Ad nauseam, until he'd finally say, "it's the Guess Who, the band." (Note: I should take part of the blame for this, because it actually worked more than once.)

Sample conversation: "Hey, Mick, what you doing tonight?"

"I dunno, Mick. What's Mick doing?"

"I think he and Mick are getting together to watch the game."

"You think Mick and Mick will let us join them, Mick?"

etc.

I don't know if these anecdotes are supposed to be funny or what. I laughed my ass off just in case.

This may have been an appeal to the very large Salvadoran population in the DC area. Moran represents Northern VA, I believe. Though I think most of the Salvadorans live in NW DC.

It is how guys keep swimming in a straight line...by using their fuckrudders.

Matos? Did your siblings recognize Chris' ridiculous nature? At what age did you understand how illogical and ignorant this Chris guy was? And HOW did your mom hook up with him? And if you have children, are they also able to recognize craziness?

And yes, Moran said it to appeal to the Salvadoran population. Before 9-11 Bush was pushing for an amnesty for illegal Mexican immigrants, and Moran, whose district has very few Mexicans but many many Salvadorans, made the comment. To be fair, apparently Mexicans and Salvadorans are extremely similar culturally. And an amnesty for them would be nice.

Of course Moran is an idiot in many other ways...

That's my uncle! Chris, we're going to be cousins!

Let me tell mine... I grew up in Detroit, and we used to take trips all over to see relatives. It was me, my ma and my dad. Well, he hated to stop all the time to let us pee along the way, because he always liked to make good time. So he bought a PORT-A-POTTY for the van we drove. This was a stinky little 2'x 2'x 2' plastic portable toilet, with chemicals in the bottom to break stuff up. After he bought it, anytime that he was in the car and we had to pee, we'd have to use the port-a-potty. Driving 85 miles on the interstate, sitting two feel off the bottom of the floor of the car, trying to pee, with bleachy chemicals licking your bottom, trying not to tip over... was a nightmare. Things were even worse when he was taking me and my little friends to the beach or something. He had no qualms about makeing little girls he didn't really know use it. AND there'd constantly be toilet paper rolling around the floor of the car. So totally embarassing for me!! And it stunk seriously bad. And you were visible to not only everyone in the car, but everyone on the road (because those tinted windows aren't really too hard to see through.) And the thing was known to tip over if the van made a sharp turn - and of course it's your fault, and you get your ass beat.