Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull?!?? We can do better than THAT!

Why is a switchblady greaser on a treasure hunt for magical power doohickeys again?

daddy issues

The problem with Excalibur is that the UK is not nearly exotic and full of boogidy boogidy dark skinned natives enough.

Wales might be.

also they still have coal mines for the cart chase

Watched the Rifftrax version tonight, which was hilarious and made it totally worthwhile to sit through this again. But I realize the ending (villian tricked into turning into immaterial being) is a direct visual ripoff of that awesome Fate of Atlantis PC Game from back in the day. Not as cool though.

Or from 'The Five Doctors'.

Just saw this (it was just okay) and I thought I could provide some answers to some questions (Tuomas' mostly):

* Who were the skull-masked Indians at the cemetery, and why were they protecting it?

Oxley's note written in the ancient code said that the "cradle" was "guarded by the"living dead".

* Why did Oxley return the crystal skull to the tomb?

Because he couldn't find out where to put it in Akator and he knew that people were coming after him.

* Why would a skull of an alien have psychic powers?

The person that returned the skull to its original place would be granted the powers of the super-beings themselves (?)

* Had the Mayan tribe lived at El Dorado all this time? What was their story?

Their civilization failed once the crystal skull was taken from the chamber of alien skeletons.

* Why was the treasure room filled with artifacts from other cultures? Why had the aliens collected them?

To learn and absorb Earth culture.

* Why did returning the skull to it's proper place summon the alien, when the skull had presumably been in the same place for centuries before the Conquistador guy stole it?

The conquistador didn't steal the skull, an enemy of the Mayan tribe did. The conquistador found the skull but not in Akator.

* Why had the aliens set up such a system in the first place?

Tourism/Colonialism?

Shia The Beef explains a few things:

"I feel like I dropped the ball on the legacy that people loved and cherished," LaBeouf said, explaining that this upped the ante for him before he began shooting the "Wall Street" sequel. "If I was going to do it twice, my career was over. So this was fight-or-flight for me."

Meeting with reporters Saturday on a terrace at the Hotel du Cap, he had some strong, confessional words about his acting in the film, which he said he felt didn't convince anyone that he was the action hero the movie claimed him to be. "You get to monkey-swinging and things like that and you can blame it on the writer and you can blame it on Steven [Spielberg, who directed]. But the actor's job is to make it come alive and make it work, and I couldn't do it. So that's my fault. Simple."

LaBeouf said that he could have kept quiet, especially given the movie's blockbuster status, but didn't think the film had fooled anyone. "I think the audience is pretty intelligent. I think they know when you've made (slop). And I think if you don't acknowledge it, then why do they trust you the next time you're promoting a movie." LaBeouf went on to say he wasn't the only star on the film who felt that way. "We [Harrison Ford and LaBeouf] had major discussions. He wasn't happy with it either. Look, the movie could have been updated. There was a reason it wasn't universally accepted."

Asked whether this was difficult to say, given his deep relationship with Spielberg, LaBeouf continued with the directness.

"I'll probably get a call. But he needs to hear this. I love him. I love Steven. I have a relationship with Steven that supersedes our business work. And believe me, I talk to him often enough to know that I'm not out of line. And I would never disrespect the man. I think he's a genius, and he's given me my whole life. He's done so much great work that there's no need for him to feel vulnerable about one film. But when you drop the ball you drop the ball."

I can already see him naming his memoirs "Shia LaBeouf: Truth Bombs and REAL TALK"

Oas a footnote, searching for "lebeouf 'truth bombs'" on Google brings you this.

shia labeouf is pretty horrendous

― memo from norv turner (omar little), Thursday, February 12, 2009 6:55 PM (1 year ago) Bookmark

labaoueouf also said that transformers 2 lost the "heart" of the first installment, so I guess he's challoping too.

for the defense:

http://www.reverseshot.com/article/indiana_jones_and_kingdom_crystal_skull_0

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IFKu_bwMoYE

Just saw this on io9. Nice cheap shot at Karen Allen, who is pointedly called "less attractive" because lol old women, amirite?

Yeah it ain't perfect.