Disgusting savages; list them ALL itt

like “mispronOunciations”

people who object to (or even take much notice of) minor foibles

People who don't express gratitude when you hold a door open for them

something that has happened to me several times recently when holding a door for someone coming up behind me is that, instead of reaching out and taking the weight of the door from me as expected, they have passed through leaving me still holding the door. wtf.

I had a couple of times in China where that happened, then they were followed by a stream of other people, making it impossible for me to let go of the door without swinging it in someone's face. So I stood there, an unpaid doorman to the city, silently, impotently, fuming.

lol

ppl who start lining up ten minutes before the plane starts to board

I do that, it's much easier to sort out your hand luggage and stuff with fewer people on the plane and besides where else are you going to go? Not much point in sitting down waiting for the line to get longer before you join it.

Only ten minutes?

savages.

absolute savages.

I've only ever flown in a helicopter. Interestingly there was no queue and we had to be politely prompted to get aboard after we'd kissed terra firma and done the sign of the cross.

Zippers breaking off your favourite coat or rucksack. Zips are savages.

The real airplane etiquette savages are the people who stand up and start getting their hand luggage down the second the plane comes to a standstill, the doors are not opening for a good ten minutes, their luggage will not arrive for another half an hour, but for some reason they have to stand there blocking the aisle. I know some people are travelling light or transferring but I'm sure the majority of these people have no good reason to do this.

travelling with hand luggage only is pretty much the norm in european flights now, 'small' wheelie suitcases can go in the overhead lockers but they fill up quickly so if you don't want your luggage in a locker at the other end of the plane from your seat, joining the queue early is unfortunately a necessity. standing in the aisle less defensible.

Claustrophobia? I went through a phase of GET ME THE HELL OUT OF HERE and planes were very triggering while it lasted.

The other day that happened on a flight I was on but the plane hadn't reached its parking spot yet, it had just stopped for some reason. A few savages stood up and had to be told to sit down again lol. xps

China Eastern Airlines are the most disgusting savages, I took my family on a daytime flight from Shanghai to London, like 9am to 2pm, the plan being to have one very long day, stay awake, then go to bed in England at 9pm and break the jetlag. But one hour after we took off we had to close all the blinds and go to sleep until an hour before arrival, we couldn't watch as we flew over the himalayas and kids sleeping patterns were fucked up for a week. Honestly still angry about this nearly three years later.

Here's a dystopian vision of the future: A real announcement I recorded on the Beijing-Shanghai bullet train. (I've subtitled it so you can watch in silence.) pic.twitter.com/ZoRWtdcSMy

— James O'Malley (@Psythor) October 29, 2018

talking of which...

Lifelong exclusion from society for behaving like a disgusting savage? Bring it on!

people who get coffee grounds all over the sink/work surfaces/washing-up sponge in the office kitchen

seriously how are there so many coffee grounds all over every available surface

I guess it is like how there is dried mud on the office floor, because I cut across a couple of metres of grass verge on my way to work and didn't realise I'd picked up any mud, and then when I saw it on the floor I made a half-hearted attempt to shift it and then went "eh, the cleaners will vacuum at some point this week, probably" because I too am a disgusting savage. yeah I guess it's pretty like that, now I think about it. but still, coffee grounds, eh

(brr @ that vid)

People who enter your building walking about half a step behind you and then edge around you and speed up like they're on the way to the most important thing ever, then you meet them in the elevator lobby and share an elevator. Like, hope it was worth all that agitation, you savage!

Lifelong exclusion from society for behaving like a disgusting savage? Bring it on!

more like lifelong exclusion from credit for ~reasons~, which tbf is a good reason to eliminate _all_ credit imo. none of you deserve it. all good.

Buskers on rush-hour tube trains

Buskers on tube trains

Buskers

ppl who start lining up ten minutes before the plane starts to board

surely it's the people who leap out of their seats the moment the plane LANDS and then stand around elbowing you in the ear for the next 15 minutes before they're allowed to disembark

Not a new one but: people who talk on the phone in public (in some situation that isn't walking down the street or walking briskly through a supermarket, confirming a list of items to purchase).

1. The guy on a crowded, packed like sardines metro train the other day who was talking on the phone with earbuds in and the phone in his pocket or something. Because it was so crowded it was like he was talking right into the side of my head. I wanted to grind his skull under the wheels of the train then send it to his mother in a ziploc bag.

2. The guy who came into my local yesterday, sat next to me at the bar, ordered a beer and a sandwich, then promptly called someone and engaged in a long conversation where he did nearly all of the talking. He drank his entire beer and ate his entire sandwich, it was a pretty long conversation and I was getting a bit fed up. So I got up and sat at the other end of the bar. I looked over at him a few times and he was still talking.

Who are these people who feel the need, whenever they're alone, stationary, and in public, to call some colleague or friend? And who are the people who are content to sit there going "oh, mhm, yap, yes, uh huh, oh I see" to someone who's basically doing all the talking (with an annoying amount of background noise). If someone called me like that I'd be like "Sorry, why are we talking about this, can it wait?"

Right there with you Fields

“Humanity is the devil”

Sort of related:

My stepfather has been making a long commute to his new job while he and my mom try to sell the house.

I asked mom if she followed him on the FindMyFriends app, and she says, Oh better than that! I call him as soon as he gets in the truck and stay on with him until he's home!

My poor, poor stepfather. I'm sure there a lot of "oh, mhm, yap, yes, uh huh, oh I see"'s during those 90 minutes.

I wouldn't do it on a packed train or just to shoot the shit but sometimes the walk to the shops, or bus trip when the baby is finally asleep, or waiting for my lunch, is literally the only time I have to make appointments, clarify arrangements etc

- people who allow their yappy lil dogs to yap CONSTANTLY when they're outside

the train here is rarely too packed by real city stds. my train phone sessions happen only due to the difficulty of finding any available time that lines up with my family's time zones. it's only a couple of hours, but causes conflicts with my actual home responsibilities. on top of that, i've had three years of trying to support with an elder caring for a spouse in memory care and i have attempted to provide her at least some level support and reinforcement. i really do try to by respectful and discreet (intentionally sitting as far from others, or even standing as far away as possible.

also, and this is key, it's a fucking actual public space wtf are you precious? fuck off. if i have to sit next to another person being reasonable on the phone or say a person who is a toxic miasma of recent weed-stench, i'm going with the phone.

(nothing personal there yall, but yknow, ~feelings~ and savages).

"the train here is rarely too packed" is probably the key diff tbh, it is a very very different proposition to sit scrunched shoulder to shoulder with someone shouting into the cord that runs up to their headphones than to be down the car from someone having a chat in a low voice. anyhoo there are lots of things i want to do on the train that i sometimes have to accept have been taken off the table by crowding: sitting down, opening a book, grading papers, etc. it's part of the deal unfortunately.

obviously any form of phone call is preferable to someone playing a FPS with their phone speaker turned on so loud you can hear it from the other end of the car tho. and tbh those coin-collecting / gem-combining games that just emit trilling dings every couple seconds, irregularly, are almost as bad.

Yah, i think my rude sensitivity above is that i am by nature one who values and tries to respect the tranquility of others in today’s shitspaceworld, and i had to negotiate a space for those phone instances with myself.

email marketers that put your name in the subject line of every single email. “hi adam! new bargains in store now!” i know my own name you creepy robots.

Literally any pub grouping of four or more men, ever

also, and this is key, it's a fucking actual public space wtf are you precious? fuck off.

If you were sitting in the same train car as me and calling your elderly relative to enquire how they're coping with their spouse's degenerative illness, I'd probably be able to get that from the tone of the call and would also appreciate your demonstrated tact by speaking softly or sitting at the other end or whatever. Little things like that really do come through to other people, it's the apparent thoughtlessness of so many Phone Talkers that gets me.

Literally any pub grouping of four or more men, ever

Agreed. Much like with Phone Talkers, it's chiefly about the senseless, unnecessary increase in ambient noise levels.

Let me also add "Literally any pub grouping of four or more women, ever."

There's a pub near me that's never busy enough to warrant having one person working on Saturday afternoon, but they occasionally get spiked by roving gangs of tourists. I saw a group of like five twentysomething American-looking women sit down on the terrasse and said to myself "here we go." It took the girl working about a half an hour to serve them a single round of drinks. They couldn't figure out how to order, couldn't decide, and then eventually each individually ordered a completely distinct and needlessly complicated mixed drink. Grapefruit juice and Apérol (?) for this one, a cuba libre for that one, this one wants a martini, etc. etc. etc. Meanwhile everyone at the bar is sitting there miserably with empty glasses.

I’m on your side. I think the thing about public conversations on the phone which is more annoying is the one-sidedness. Supposedly the uneven nature of it forces your brain to pay attention rather than just tuning out like you can so when it’s people having an irl conversation.

While on the subject of bad train behaviour, shout out to the woman on my train who takes her shoes off and placed her (socked) feet on the seat opposite.

I do that. As long as there isn't anyone sitting in the seat next to the opposite seat I don't see a problem. My feet don't smell.

You’re in a public space, what compels you? Also, you might not have smelly feet but enough of the travelling public don’t wash or change clothes regularly, so I can’t say I care about this being normalised.

Nothing "compels" me, it's just more comfortable on a long train journey. It's weird to suggest that there's something wrong with doing it as long as there's no-one else in close proximity (when I agree it would be a no-no).

needlessly complicated mixed drink. Grapefruit juice and Apérol (?) for this one, a cuba libre for that one, this one wants a martini

These drinks are 2 ingredients plus ice plus a green thing, right? Admittedly the martini probably needs a shake but if a bartender can't assemble a spirit + mixer in about the same timeframe as pouring a non-frothy beer then that's not the customer's fault.

Epic indecision, lack of coordinated ordering and needless loudness is the customer's fault though, I'll give you that.

much love,

a rum+Coke drinker

(to me "Cuba Libre" signals that you're just getting a rum+coke but the price tag is suddenly doubled because the bartender might spend an extra half-second squeezing the lime before dropping it in but mainly because now it has a fancy name - looking forward to learning that I'm an uncultured barbarian and/or this is another transatlantic "divided by a common language" thing though)

...And to weigh in on the other topic of the day, it bothers me when people put their shoed feet on the seat opposite (thanks for wiping your gross dirty shoes on something someone's going to sit on) so I guess I should be grateful for that extra step of taking shoes off, but habitual public shoe removers also seem a bit weird to me

not really sure why it bothers me, maybe just the feeling that if I did that someone would tell me I was weird and gross, therefore nobody else should get away with it

also I had a persistent bastard of a verruca a while ago that I am p. sure I originally got from going briefly shoeless but not sockless while changing in the toilets either at work or at my physio clinic, so: shoes. shoes are good imo. except when they're bad, for reasons like they are expensive and never fit right and make your feet hot and then they get holes in

If you order a cuba libre in the U.S. the bartender will probably ask you what's in that?

get yr feet off the fuckin seat ffs

"my feet dont smell" is in the group of sentences with "my dog doesnt bite" "my child would never do that" "i dont need a shower" and "im only parking for a minute" that is the realm of utterly unsocialised savages and not an inch should be given to em

Mildly in awe of the guy last week having an extremely loud conversation on the phone in a crowded train carriage about how the police were stacking up charges against him and had a lot of evidence so he was going to jump bail and get a job at a French ski resort, in the expectation he could get away with it for at least six months.

I once shared a bus with a guy trying to sell a “lightly spiked mattress” to someone on the phone he started threatening five minutes later about a completely unrelated topic.

xp otm

Lightly soiled, jfc

The driver who managed to soak me completely from a not particularly large looking puddle as I waited to cross an otherwise empty side road is a disgusting savage.

I just get down to my boxers when on a long train journey, because it's more comfortable and my bod is sublime.