And I do this for a living! (answer phones. At least partly anyway)
(I still hates it)
― Stoop Crone (Trayce), Wednesday, 11 July 2018 05:31 (five years ago) link
There is a lady in the garden next door who's keeps yelling MIAOW MIAOW at her cat every 20 seconds. She doesn't live there but her cat's come over a few fences and she's trying to get him back.
I heard her saying, "I know it's annoying, but this is how I get the cat to come back to me." She's been yelling it for an hour now. The cat has not come back.
― Chuck_Tatum, Wednesday, 11 July 2018 10:24 (five years ago) link
Like, the cat is literally at the bottom of the garden, ignoring her.
― Chuck_Tatum, Wednesday, 11 July 2018 10:25 (five years ago) link
it sounds like she has a lot to teach you
― ogmor, Wednesday, 11 July 2018 10:30 (five years ago) link
lol, true
― Chuck_Tatum, Wednesday, 11 July 2018 10:31 (five years ago) link
MIAOW MIAOW!
― ogmor, Wednesday, 11 July 2018 10:34 (five years ago) link
Meanwhile the cat's thinking like "That's not even my dialect of Cat, beeyotch. And anyway what you are saying is meaningless; you're just mimicking the sound. Christ, get one dictionary."
― nonsensei (Ye Mad Puffin), Wednesday, 11 July 2018 11:03 (five years ago) link
not even a question mark on the miaou ffs
― repartee is deft (darraghmac), Wednesday, 11 July 2018 11:08 (five years ago) link
¿MIAOW?
― ogmor, Wednesday, 11 July 2018 11:30 (five years ago) link
Other day I went to visit my friend who happens to be homeless.
Approached a frat bro who was with a group of his friends and asked him for a smoke.
Bro: “why don’t you try knocking on people’s windows?”
His friend gives me a smoke instead.
I ask the group if they can make sure my friend is okay because she is homeless and especially vulnerable as a woman.
Bro: “we got that covered already”
Talked to my friend today and she said he mocked my voice and manner when I walked away. Of course not to my face because I would’ve rolled the ducker
― Ross, Wednesday, 11 July 2018 19:25 (five years ago) link
people who say “do you like the corrs? i like the corrs” when what they mean is “i like that one song they did 23 years ago that you hear when you go to the chemist”
― karl wallogina (Autumn Almanac), Friday, 13 July 2018 09:42 (five years ago) link
you could have stopped at 'i like the corrs' tbrr
― look, you’re just gonna get gravy on the baby sometimes 🤷♂️ (bizarro gazzara), Friday, 13 July 2018 09:47 (five years ago) link
They play music in the chemistsssssss?
― Alan Alba (Tom D.), Friday, 13 July 2018 09:56 (five years ago) link
it’s called “chemist warehouse radio”
― karl wallogina (Autumn Almanac), Friday, 13 July 2018 10:16 (five years ago) link
Everyone who looks at this awful weather and is like “oooh I love the heat!” Fuck you, this weather is awful and I would take a million more snowed-out Lidl-broken-into-Marches over a second more of this hell.
― gyac, Monday, 23 July 2018 16:57 (five years ago) link
The guy on our network server who spells his name with a space at the beginning so his folder appears at the very top.
― pplains, Monday, 23 July 2018 20:54 (five years ago) link
Good one. “=“ also works
― calstars, Monday, 23 July 2018 20:57 (five years ago) link
Asterisks work too. I have a folder on my desktop that's labeled *DO NOT DELETE* so that a) it'll always stay in the top right corner of the screen and b) I won't accidentally delete it.
― grawlix (unperson), Monday, 23 July 2018 22:01 (five years ago) link
The space is just being sneaky. It takes you, oh, an extra five seconds to figure out what's happening.
― pplains, Monday, 23 July 2018 23:15 (five years ago) link
They've started playing I Heart Radio channels in the halls at work, and whoever programs the I Heart the '70s channel can suck my balls.
In 2018, I should not be hearing "American Pie" every. single. day.
Also, evidently Paul McCartney only recorded 3 songs in the '70s: Maybe I'm Amazed, Band on the Run, With a Little Luck.
― Hideous Lump, Tuesday, 24 July 2018 02:56 (five years ago) link
they should really throw "jet" in there
― princess of hell (BradNelson), Tuesday, 24 July 2018 02:57 (five years ago) link
people on Twitter whose argumentative retorts include mentioning how few followers their adversary has in comparison to their own follower count. i've never had this happen to me b/c i don't actually argue with people on Twitter but whenever I encounter it I just can't believe a grown person would actually pull the "you're not even popular, especially not compared to me!" card.
(this post was prompted by observing this behavior from Jonah Goldberg, who is, as always, the worst).
― evol j, Thursday, 26 July 2018 18:52 (five years ago) link
People who walk on the left hand side of the sidewalk
― calstars, Thursday, 2 August 2018 23:53 (five years ago) link
In the U.S., yes. Mightn't it more or press parallel the driving convention elsewhere?
― devil's avocado (Ye Mad Puffin), Friday, 3 August 2018 00:11 (five years ago) link
It might.
― calstars, Friday, 3 August 2018 00:38 (five years ago) link
It does. We walk on the left here, well I mean people walk like idiots wherever they want with their faces glued to their phones actually, but you know.
― Stoop Crone (Trayce), Friday, 3 August 2018 07:14 (five years ago) link
I pay attention to walking conventions and then willfully ignore them whenever I actually have somewhere to be that isn't behind some trundling doofus on a sidewalk
― El Tomboto, Friday, 3 August 2018 11:31 (five years ago) link
Savagery question:
When I'm buying meat at the butcher, my butcher always touches the bacon/chicken/raw meat with his bare hands, then gives me my change without washing his hands, so I'm stuck with a bunch of raw bacon cash.
Is this:
a. Savageb. I should get over myselfc. I should get over myself, and in fact it's not a health hazard at all
― Chuck_Tatum, Friday, 3 August 2018 13:58 (five years ago) link
accept your meaty reality, but pay on card
― ogmor, Friday, 3 August 2018 14:00 (five years ago) link
My answer is A
― calstars, Friday, 3 August 2018 14:15 (five years ago) link
Gross, he needs disposable gloves
― Mario Meatwagon (Moodles), Friday, 3 August 2018 14:21 (five years ago) link
thats gross but not as actually alarming as handling cash and THEN handling the meat. But it sounds like he is savage as hell and needs correction.
― Hunt3r, Friday, 3 August 2018 14:38 (five years ago) link
B. Everything you touch or ingest is covered with gross things you don't happen to know about.
The only reason you're bothered by bacon cash is that you know about it. It's possible that the cash you get in change from your local coffee shop was covered in something worse.
The world is filthy and that's why you have an immune system. And your immune system craves exercise to stay healthy.
― devil's avocado (Ye Mad Puffin), Friday, 3 August 2018 15:38 (five years ago) link
most money has feces or cocaine residue on it, i heard way back
― eris (Ross), Friday, 3 August 2018 15:44 (five years ago) link
Dose makes the poison in many ways, tho i am generally of the “something’s poop...it’s almost everywhere” belief. That does not mean you handle money and put it in your mouth or pick your nose, or handle food afterwards without washing.https://food.unl.edu/food-poisoning-foodborne-illnessXp
― Hunt3r, Friday, 3 August 2018 15:51 (five years ago) link
thanks Hunt3r
― Ross, Friday, 3 August 2018 15:53 (five years ago) link
yw but man i ain't a expert i just surf a lot. and lecture my kids about handwashing.
― Hunt3r, Friday, 3 August 2018 16:09 (five years ago) link
Don’t wanna be a mr. bungle. Good parenting
― Ross, Friday, 3 August 2018 16:19 (five years ago) link
i'm actually going to school rn and my intention is to become an inspector (possibly restaurant though not sure what else i'll become interested in once i get into the specific program more). And i'm coming from having worked in kitchens for a long time. That sounds really **cked-up to me. I had a friend who used to surreptitiously post these types of egregious infractions on her social media page but she stopped doing that and i'm not sure if direct confrontation or calling the cdc or something is better. but imo there are SO many different things that can happen, most obvious being the potential harm to anyone that may be at-risk (the old, very young, pregnant, whatnot)
― lâche pas la patate (outdoor_miner), Friday, 3 August 2018 16:20 (five years ago) link
oh, aforementioned friend would take pics or viddys and post on her fb to warn her friends, that wasn't v clear in previous post
― lâche pas la patate (outdoor_miner), Friday, 3 August 2018 16:21 (five years ago) link
i mean it sounds like this person is cross-contaminating *everything* and with things like this in the news (https://www.sciencealert.com/superbugs-becoming-more-resistant-to-hospital-alcohol-disinfectant-sanitiser)why would one mess with epidemiology
― lâche pas la patate (outdoor_miner), Friday, 3 August 2018 16:34 (five years ago) link
^^
― Hunt3r, Friday, 3 August 2018 16:37 (five years ago) link
People making the searches which mean that Google offers to autocomplete a search for ANY well known name with "net worth". The fuck is wrong with people.
― an incoherent crustacean (MatthewK), Friday, 3 August 2018 21:34 (five years ago) link
better than 'feet' (marginally)
― mookieproof, Saturday, 4 August 2018 00:33 (five years ago) link
this dude bought me breakfast the other day, then spotted money at my place and said he was gonna take it for the breakfast he bought me. you cannot steal a gift man, never hang out with that sucker again
― Ross, Friday, 10 August 2018 22:40 (five years ago) link
People who write the address on a parcel at the post office counter. My god.
― kraudive, Friday, 17 August 2018 15:24 (five years ago) link
related - post office counter staff who insist on slowly typing the full address into their computer without asking if I want proof of postage, even after I question whether they actually need to do that (they do not need to do that, unless I want proof of postage, which I do not because it's completely useless)
― Colonel Poo, Friday, 17 August 2018 15:27 (five years ago) link
xp
otm
Even worse are the ones that also try to do all of their packing at the counter.
― Mario Meatwagon (Moodles), Friday, 17 August 2018 15:37 (five years ago) link
Do we have a thread on this man
http://masterpiececakes.com/
― Rabbit Control (Latham Green), Friday, 17 August 2018 16:46 (five years ago) link
people who listen to music or anything else off their phones in public without fucking earbuds. good fucking christ please bring back the boombox. I don't want to listen to squealing trebly high pitched shit whining out of your phone.
― akm, Saturday, 13 October 2018 22:06 (five years ago) link