thanks, Fizzles, for that excellent article!
― Neil S, Thursday, 13 August 2015 11:16 (eight years ago) link
There must be some sort of lifehack to make a transfer at Green Park quicker.
― slideshow bob (suzy), Thursday, 13 August 2015 11:40 (eight years ago) link
like the shortcut to the central line at oxford circus
― doing my Objectives, handling some intense stuff (LocalGarda), Thursday, 13 August 2015 11:42 (eight years ago) link
the scumbags (roughly 70% of the population) who insist upon putting their feet on the seat opposite
I guess they can't have seen those delightful and hilarious illustrated rhymes politely requesting them not to!!!
― ledge, Thursday, 13 August 2015 11:46 (eight years ago) link
Am still utterly bamboozled by Kings Cross transfers since the redevelopment. Victoria line to surface level is always a ten mile hike, yet I'm sure I've once or twice found some secret entrance which somehow makes the reverse journey 90% shorter.
― ledge, Thursday, 13 August 2015 11:49 (eight years ago) link
things they need a twee rhyme for:
-standing on the right-stopping at the top of the escalator-stinking of body odour and or shit
― doing my Objectives, handling some intense stuff (LocalGarda), Thursday, 13 August 2015 11:52 (eight years ago) link
standing on the left i mean, i swear i'm not one of them
nyc has signs telling people to take their backpacks off, another thing london needs, instead of some bullshit about dumping newspapers (this is annoying but not as bad as people smelling or being thick)
― doing my Objectives, handling some intense stuff (LocalGarda), Thursday, 13 August 2015 11:53 (eight years ago) link
Never noticed any issues with Victoria-to-surface at Kings Cross - I do it every day.
The Northern escalator has reopened, though, so there's finally an end to that ridiculous walk.
― Chuck_Tatum, Thursday, 13 August 2015 11:59 (eight years ago) link
Ok I think I've figured out the kings cross conundrum (with the aid of someone else's hard work): http://stations.aeracode.org/#kxx (click on the kings x st pancras victoria line button) - look at that huge long passage from the right (north) end of the victoria line platforms to the northern ticket hall - that's the underground hike of doom which I find myself taking every time to get up to the mainline station. But it looks like there's a single escalator from the south end of the platform up to the eastern ticket hall.
― ledge, Thursday, 13 August 2015 12:00 (eight years ago) link
Does this help?http://www.buzzfeed.com/bkjmiller/how-to-win-at-kings-cross-station-and-not-be-take-a0ii#.ljzxRPjEl
― woof, Thursday, 13 August 2015 12:05 (eight years ago) link
now you've gone and made me laugh at buzzfeed. but yes, that's it.
― ledge, Thursday, 13 August 2015 12:08 (eight years ago) link
I love that! WALKING WALKING WALKING WALKING WALKING
― slideshow bob (suzy), Thursday, 13 August 2015 12:11 (eight years ago) link
London Reconnections made the rounds at the start of the year with their exhaustive breakdown of the massive delays around King's Cross / Finsbury Park over Christmas.
http://www.londonreconnections.com/2015/know-run-story-behind-xmas-kings-cross-problems/
― Andrew Farrell, Thursday, 13 August 2015 12:12 (eight years ago) link
This is very useful. Esp as I'll be catching a 7am train from Kings X tomorrow and I do not expect to have a luxurious amount of time when I get off the Vic. Back of the train, head up to Eastern ticket hall - got it.
― Michael Jones, Thursday, 13 August 2015 12:14 (eight years ago) link
haha that is funny - that corridor is the fucking worse, nobody obeys any sensible rule of passage and it's just dog eat dog madness
― doing my Objectives, handling some intense stuff (LocalGarda), Thursday, 13 August 2015 12:16 (eight years ago) link
worst*
I do all of these shortcuts already -- after 30+ years of using London Underground, every journey has the possibility of a new iteration: a different carriage, a different exit, etc. Shaving 10 seconds off a trip becomes a major victory (especially if you do that trip every day).
Also you need to work on your parkour skills for walking down a corridor in the wrong (but quicker) direction without massively pissing off the people walking towards you (cf. the corridor at Finsbury Park, using the "No Entrance" entrance to get on the Northern Line at Tott Court Rd, etc.)
― Chuck_Tatum, Thursday, 13 August 2015 12:35 (eight years ago) link
Ace In The Tube
― doing my Objectives, handling some intense stuff (LocalGarda), Thursday, 13 August 2015 12:37 (eight years ago) link
walking down a corridor in the wrong (but quicker) direction without massively pissing off the people walking towards you
outrageous, can we get a twee rhyme against this
― ledge, Thursday, 13 August 2015 12:46 (eight years ago) link
when walking through our maze of hellmake sure you read the tube signs wellcos if you travel the wrong wayyou are a disgusting savage
― doing my Objectives, handling some intense stuff (LocalGarda), Thursday, 13 August 2015 12:51 (eight years ago) link
when travelling on the central linedrinking wine, feeling finebefore you reach out to grab a barask yourself, do i stink of body odour? should i have washed my clothes or myself at any point in the history of my vile life?
― doing my Objectives, handling some intense stuff (LocalGarda), Thursday, 13 August 2015 12:52 (eight years ago) link
walking in the wrong directionmight get you where you want on timebut though you have the best intentionyou might annoy others which is a terrible crime
*shoots self*
― ledge, Thursday, 13 August 2015 12:57 (eight years ago) link
what are the existing ones for? not moving down? discarding papers? is that it?
― doing my Objectives, handling some intense stuff (LocalGarda), Thursday, 13 August 2015 12:58 (eight years ago) link
Is there one for holding doors open? I don't mind the rhymes as much as the terrifying twee smiley faces tbh.
― Andrew Farrell, Thursday, 13 August 2015 13:00 (eight years ago) link
the rhymes and the drawings are the same evil beast for me
― doing my Objectives, handling some intense stuff (LocalGarda), Thursday, 13 August 2015 13:01 (eight years ago) link
we're in the age now where a black and white sign that said DON'T HOLD THE DOORS OPEN, IT DELAYS THE TRAIN would be welcome
― doing my Objectives, handling some intense stuff (LocalGarda), Thursday, 13 August 2015 13:02 (eight years ago) link
in the age or at the age
― ledge, Thursday, 13 August 2015 13:02 (eight years ago) link
little from column a little from column b
― doing my Objectives, handling some intense stuff (LocalGarda), Thursday, 13 August 2015 13:04 (eight years ago) link
there's one about trying not to be violently sick all over the carriage, and to hold it in until the next stop if at all possible
though you might be violently illit would be much politer stillif you could wait until the next stopbefore puking the contents of your guts up
― Neil S, Thursday, 13 August 2015 13:06 (eight years ago) link
^ my own work, v sorry to all and to TFL also
Don't vomitOn the tube carriage floorThat's whatThe night bus is for
― Chuck_Tatum, Thursday, 13 August 2015 13:07 (eight years ago) link
aw well you missed out on finding the fun shortcut for this one, which they eventually started marking, so if you followed enough 'no access to the northern line' signs you'd find a 'northern line this way' sign
― Merdeyeux, Thursday, 13 August 2015 13:16 (eight years ago) link
I noticed that on Sunday, when I had to get to the Angel before a set time, couldn't bus it because I needed to reload my Oystercard and was worried about WALKING WALKING WALKING between Piccadilly and Northern lines. It was *concerning* how happy it made me not to have to deal with that palaver any more.
― slideshow bob (suzy), Thursday, 13 August 2015 13:23 (eight years ago) link
xposts
a few years back i was on the tube at christmas, like the last week paean to sodom and gomorrah, going from oxford street to bethnal green. and there was this one guy who was a shell of himself, like swaying everywhere, hanging onto the bars, most of the seats were full but it was just me and him in the space by the doors. anyway he began to lurch a bit more and soon by about holborn he puked out the doors when they opened. it was horrible but ultimately the mood i was in i felt kind of sorry for him, there were few people getting on, i guess when they saw him.
anyway we got to like chancery lane and he did the same thing, puked out the doors. then this american guy who was sitting down was like "dude that is fucking disgusting, don't puke on the goddamn TOOB" (i swear he said it like this) - and the guy could barely speak, he was prob trying to say i'm sorry but he was locked inside his own body, and this american got him and really berated him, then took like an empty mcdonalds bag off his gf and was like "dude that is fucking horrible, puke in the goddamn bag, you're a fucking mess" etc, really obnoxious.
so i decided this was a bit off and i told him to leave him alone, he's obviously in bits etc, he doesn't need a lecture. and the american was like "oh you think it's okay to puke on the goddamn TOOB, oh yeah you do?" and i was just thinking get a life or whatever.
anyway there was that silence that descends after somebody speaks to another person on the tube and i was sort of basking in at least having told this moron off. a minute had maybe passed when the american guy's gf just gurgled and puked all over the floor.
when i asked him, as i exited, if he should perhaps ask our friend for the mcdonalds bag back, i almost felt like there had to be a god.
― doing my Objectives, handling some intense stuff (LocalGarda), Thursday, 13 August 2015 13:24 (eight years ago) link
I've been using the lift shortcut for the Northern line - eventually they added some kind of guilt trippy sign to it, like "Do NOT use this unless you're disabled or old"
― Chuck_Tatum, Thursday, 13 August 2015 13:26 (eight years ago) link
xp LOL karma!
― slideshow bob (suzy), Thursday, 13 August 2015 13:37 (eight years ago) link
xxp justice! Though possible puking guy was the cause of puking gf?
― Neil S, Thursday, 13 August 2015 13:42 (eight years ago) link
could be i guess. it was definitely that real lairy time of year, possibly the last thurs or friday before xmas
― doing my Objectives, handling some intense stuff (LocalGarda), Thursday, 13 August 2015 13:44 (eight years ago) link
That is a story, that stays with you.
― Andrew Farrell, Thursday, 13 August 2015 13:48 (eight years ago) link
yeah it's definitely in my fairly competitive top 10
― doing my Objectives, handling some intense stuff (LocalGarda), Thursday, 13 August 2015 13:49 (eight years ago) link
TOOB
― conrad, Thursday, 13 August 2015 14:08 (eight years ago) link
silly americans, we all know it's pronounced 'choob'
― Merdeyeux, Thursday, 13 August 2015 14:18 (eight years ago) link
The district line is like meandering conservatory, with a slightly weak but pleasant ale on the table
― saer, Thursday, 13 August 2015 14:24 (eight years ago) link
For those who have never traveled through the underground yet open air line, here is a short section near Sloane Square
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BVlr24zD_KQ
― saer, Thursday, 13 August 2015 14:28 (eight years ago) link
https://tfl.gov.uk/cdn/static/cms/images/tbl-poster-doors.jpg
The first time I saw this poster I was irrationally angry about the lack of rhyme (in my accent anyway) between 'doors' and 'cause'.
What's the worst Tube line for summer heat?
There were a couple articles about this during the heat wave. Unsurprisingly Central Line takes top spot in both. http://www.citymetric.com/transport/which-london-s-hottest-tube-line-1186http://londonist.com/2015/07/itd-be-illegal-to-transport-cattle-in-these-temperatures
― salsa shark, Friday, 14 August 2015 07:47 (eight years ago) link
LG, that story is ALL TIME
― Credit: howtokeepapositiveattitudedotcom (stevie), Friday, 14 August 2015 08:06 (eight years ago) link
http://www.standard.co.uk/comment/comment/sam-leith-tube-campaign-makes-lovers-of-language-cringe-10289267.html
― Chuck_Tatum, Friday, 14 August 2015 09:24 (eight years ago) link
In the fine McGonagall tradition tbh
― imago, Friday, 14 August 2015 11:41 (eight years ago) link
McGonagall wasn't contemptuous of his audience... afaik!
― The Tony Hart Land (Tom D.), Friday, 14 August 2015 11:43 (eight years ago) link