people that YELP are scumbags

I love this so much, like -- you're eating bites of the same thing, were you worried there were going to be massive fluctuations of tastiness?

But I'm glad it wasn't bland like most Asian food

wtfffff

kill kill kill

[I shuck the wooden splinters off my chopsticks.]

free head shot to people who do this.

there is a vietnamese restaurant i go to probably once every other month or so. it's owned by a family from vietnam and they go to vietnam for several weeks in the winter every year. this year i was there and the guy told me they were going in feb and march since i am a trusted regular but i forgot when they get back so i checked yelp knowing some yelper would have complained about it. lo and behold a one star review saying it's closed until march 25 and they didn't even update their website! GOSH! i know it's not a great business practice to close for two months out of the year but like ugh yelpers. this place is tiny and cash only it's not like closing a domino's you ass.

i need to c/p some of these reviews

Cash only, small(er) portions, small interior.

Came here with a few friends for dinner. Not in the greatest area of Baltimore, especially as it gets dark, so just be wary.

I got the pho (P2) and I thought it was just okay. For the price ($8) I thought the portion size was small. Also, I don't like pho places with square bowls...I feel like it takes away some of the authenticity. The broth was a bit too salty and there really wasn't much that was remarkable about my noodles.

My friend got spring rolls and they were just okay too. They were small but you do get four per serving.

The staff came across as a little bit pushy. I get that since it's a small place, having a high turnover of customers for lunch/dinner rush is important, but I just never really felt comfortable during my dining experience. Since it's one of the few rare Vietnamese places in Baltimore, it's likely I'll be back at some point. But given the price and quality, it will be begrudgingly.

i'm sorry you have to begrudgingly go out to eat now ;_;

ROUND BOWL AUTHENTICITY

Roundeye authenticity

square bemoans square bowls

square bemoans square bowls, begrudges squaring bill for small soup size

this food is not remarkable

& yet remarks are remarked

square bowls square bowls square square bowls!
i'd like it if they liked us, but i don't think they like us

i demand remarkable noodles
0 stars

sometimes i really hate how much yelp makes me hate complete strangers, not healthy, square bowls, 2 stars

there is a vietnamese restaurant i go to probably once every other month or so. it's owned by a family from vietnam and they go to vietnam for several weeks in the winter every year. this year i was there and the guy told me they were going in feb and march since i am a trusted regular but i forgot when they get back so i checked yelp knowing some yelper would have complained about it. lo and behold a one star review saying it's closed until march 25 and they didn't even update their website! GOSH! i know it's not a great business practice to close for two months out of the year but like ugh yelpers. this place is tiny and cash only it's not like closing a domino's you ass.

after the "GOSH!" I went back and re-read it Napoleon Dynamite style and it was very enjoyable indeed

this fucking guy

http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/style-blog/wp/2014/03/18/meet-the-man-who-chronicled-his-heart-breaking-love-story-in-yelp-reviews/

It’s a novel and somewhat subversive use of the popular review site, which thrives on cut-and-dry, crowdsourced ratings of things like food and ambiance.

food, ambiance, and butthurt

http://www.yelp.com/biz/vip-room-new-york?hrid=xN6WXZBirTSDSbhklaAP8A

that's why they call it dope, dope

“The salad was fresh. The chicken was baked just right although there were a couple of raw spots. Very flavorful rice and quick delivery”

lol. yelp reviews are so bad now. you need to read a dozen from a given resto just to get a feel for quality and taste

http://www.adventure-journal.com/2014/04/the-aj-list-the-17-best-bad-reviews-of-national-parks-on-yelp/

TADA: a great big hole.

Lots of wonderful point-missing but the one comment that seems quintessentially Yelpish is the one where they have to pay the full, outrageous $25 per car (note, possibly the cheapest price you could possibly pay to do ANYTHING with a carload of people) even though fog was partially obscuring one of the most spectacular gifts which humankind has found in its wanderings around the strange and impossible landscape of this planet.

i am still mad about the national park reviews

there's a cafe around the corner for me that charges $4–5 for one cup of coffee. they are real prissy about making each cup individually, measuring out the water, timing the drip, etc.

i can't fucking stand these places. i'm not gonna yelp about it or anything but come on. the dumpy coffee place down the block from me closed and one of these artisanal one-cup joints went into the space and it really sucks.

― goole, Tuesday, May 29, 2012 2:05 PM (1 year ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

totally come around on this joint fyi. it's awesome. they know my name, the owner brings his baby daughter around. it's delightful.

they do a bread plate with butter and preserves that is sooo good

Useful 1, Funny 1, Cool 1

I try to yelp about it now, but isn't it funny how everything works out?

the mount rainier one with the cosby reference was great

they do a bread plate with butter and preserves that is sooo good

― goole, Thursday, April 10, 2014 1:50 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I bet it's served on a wood plank and is $12.

they do a bread plate with butter and preserves that is sooo good

― goole, Thursday, April 10, 2014 12:50 PM (Yesterday)

you're ruining saint paul

next thing you'll have a face computer

I try to yelp about it now, but isn't it funny how everything works out?

― take a piece of mr. baxter's hand (how's life), Thursday, April 10, 2014 2:00 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I want apple butter (ohh ohh)
Now I'm downin' it

Are you kidding me a fall rut season and no elk in Horseshoe Park?

it's on a piece of slate and costs $3, so, close

i'll cop to ruining st paul tho. anywhere near john ireland or arcade and i am hopelessly lost

it's awesome. they know my name

The people at my regular coffeeshop know my name. I hate when they call me by name, it's a weird unasked-for intimacy. Maybe I should YELP about it.

if they are pros you can ask them to stop

i was told by a barista that the place she worked had a regular who wanted no banter or pleasantries from anyone, just wanted to get his coffee, sit down, read the paper (contrary to their very aggressive customer-service policy). so they obliged him!

Having to say "please don't call me by name" would be even worse than being called by name.

tell them it was never your real name and you'd just as soon protect your identity

http://www.yelp.com/biz/kaiser-permanente-los-angeles-medical-center-los-angeles?hrid=ofBluEE1AF-w3UKq9IKF_g

ha, that's the medical center i go to.

i've had really good experiences with kaiser and that medical center overall.

"Frequent readers of my reviews know I'm s stickler for authentic cuisine. I have studied historical origins of foods and when I visit a spot and see something on the menu that piques my attention .. I quickly order it up. Such was the case tonight.

My little sister and her husband were in town from Southern California, so my older sis and I decided to take them to Moretti's .. which I've never been .. but is a favorite place of my sister's.

I began my meal with a salad featuring "Creamy Gorgonzola and Bacon Dressing" with greens, tomatoes and onions. Rather good dressing and I was quite pleased.

My sister raves about the "Veal Moretti" at this establishment AND my not really knowing what that was?? lead to a dilemna. This was solved by my partner in crime ordering it so we could share the experience.

Being the "stickler" I wanted to try their version "Veal Marsala" WHICH origin is "Scaloppine al Marsala". Every trattoria in Rome offers up a rendition of this dish .. be it veal or chicken .. cooked in a Marsala wine sauce .. but the dish is indeed Jewish in origin .. nonetheless .. it has spread throughout the world and is quite delicious. Moretti's version was no different.

My "Veal Marsala" featured sauteed mushrooms in a rich wine sauce and a side of pasta in red sauce. Despite having too thick of sauce .. traditions ya know .. my "Veal Marsala" was very good. The pasta in red sauce, however, was fair at best.

My partner in crime's "Veal Moretti" was tasty as well .. WHICH ended up being a breaded veal cutlet buried in an "Alfredo" sauce smothered with poached mushrooms. I personally wouldn't have sogged the veal cutlet in a sauce if I were the chef, because the parts that weren't covered were crispy and very flavorful. I wanted THAT part .. but hey that's me. Still .. it was very good."

I can't decide whether "Such was the case tonight" or "the dish is indeed Jewish in origin" is the real standout here. But then again there's "partner in crime" and "I have studied historical origins of foods" and of course the opening reference to "frequent readers of my reviews."

just all the quotation marks

i refuse to eat any veal marsala that hasn't been bar mitzvahed